Never Think
by TwilightAddiction6
Summary: Four mates move to LA.Charlie has been in love with Rob Pattinson for years,and is happy when she meets him.But she is stuck between Rob and an old crush.Will Charlie choose between the two look-alikes or will she decide to get the best of both worlds?
1. LA

I was glad that we had got to Los Angeles, but I still couldn't deny how much I would miss Peterborough. I always complained about how awful it was, but I would really miss my family. We had agreed to stay in contact though, through the phone and my computer.

Even my Mum was going to be learning how to use a laptop after she had decided to try and learn how to use the laptop properly s that she could send emails to me. It was right really, after I had spent my waking hour on that laptop, writing my stories.

I had finished _Party Time _now, my story where I met Rob Pattinson himself. Oh god that was my dream come true there. I longed to meet my hero himself whilst we were in LA, dreamed of it even. I had liked Rob Pattinson since I was roughly about fifteen years old.

And now that I was twenty two, it certainly didn't bother me that he was twenty eight. I had fancied him from the beginning, and who could blame me? He wasn't just a fittie either; he was also a super-talented singer, actor, and guitar and piano player.

Wow, couldn't get much better than that.

I looked around my new bedroom again from my bed. I had already put my hello kitty suitcases on my unusual, double bed. Everything was already set up for us to move in, which was good as we didn't have to move anything.

It had super shiny wooden floor on the floor, and had a rug at the side of each of my double bed. There was a red mat in front of the front door for people to wipe their feet when they wanted to come into my bedroom which was smart.

There was a cream sofa on the right side of the room which was dying for me to jump on, and a nig, black, flat screen television in front of my bed. The spa-styled bath which was round was on the left side of the room, behind my bed.

I sighed heavily as I took in the perfection of it all, knowing that I was missing my Mum already. I was just happy when my new American mobile phone started to ring-or should that be cell?-and I looked at the screen to see that it was my Mum calling me.

''Mum!'' I shouted excitedly, answering my mobile eagerly. I heard laughter from her in response to my eagerness.

''You're there then?'' She asked me, sounding a little worried. I knew why…I had supposed to have rang her, but I totally forgot. It was the excitement of it all, and even when I stepped off on the plane onto LA ground, I couldn't stop myself from screaming in delight.

I hadn't truly believed that us Girls were going to make it here. I had started to wonder about it truthfully, but I was so glad that we had got here now. All I had to do now was find my stunning sex god…

''Yeah. I'm sorry for not ringing you, I was going to send you a text and ring you in the morning.'' I promised her, knowing that was exactly why she had rang me for. She would have been worried about me.

''That's alright. Are you having a good time?'' She asked me, sounding excited. I knew that my Mum never actually expected us to get to Los Angeles, but we had all shocked her and finally got here.

''Yeah, and it is so cool, Mum! Oh my god, I'm not even joking. The rooms are so cool, and like, I have a spa kinda bath in my room, and just…yeah, wow.'' I finished, giggling at how excited I sounded.

''Well that's good then. How does the house look then?'' My Mum asked me curiously. I took another look around my room as she asked me, and giggled again in response. It truly was amazing.

''It's really big. Like a proper big house. And the kitchen like proper looks amazing, the bedrooms are all huge-''

''-Yeah alright, keep rubbing it in!'' She interrupted me, huffing. I laughed in response, unable to stop myself. It wasn't my fault; if she had believed me in the beginning then we wouldn't be having this conversation.

''Well alright then, I just wanted to ring you and make sure that you had got there okay. I better go because of my credit.''

''Well okay, I'll ring you in the morning…well it will be morning for you but early afternoon for us.'' I added, laughing.

She sighed heavily. ''Yeah alright, keep rubbing it in.'' I laughed in response again, biting on one of my right nails like how I always did.

''I'll speak to you tomorrow then, yeah?'' I asked her.

''Yeah, you will. Love you.'' She added, making me smile.

''Love you too Mum.'' I replied, before forcing myself to hang up. I so badly missed my Mum right now, but I was still happy. I had wanted this since I was sixteen. To finally meet my sex god. It was my dream come true.

And I knew that he was in LA too now. He was filming his new film; _Lost Summer_. It was about a Guy who falls in love with this Girl in summer, and how they part and he's left searching for her. It actually sounded very good, and not just because my sex god was in it…well maybe.

I walked downstairs because I didn't feel very tired yet even though it was now nine at night, and we had been travelling all day. The Girls were outside, talking to our neighbours next door. I smiled at them after the smiled at me.

''You must be Charlie…I'm Phil.'' one of them greeted me.

I nodded my head. ''Hi Phil, and yeah, that's me.'' I replied, walking over to the Girls, and stuffing my hands into my jean pockets self consciously, pursing my lips like how I always did when I was a little embarrassed at meeting someone new.

''The Girls were saying you just moved here. And you're the youngest, right?'' One of the other guys asked. I met his eyes, and he smiled apologetically at me. ''I'm Adam by the way.'' He added.

I laughed in response. ''Well hi Adam. And yeah, unfortunately I'm the youngest one.'' I sighed heavily, rolling my eyes, making Rachael laugh. She knew that I hated being the youngest which was probably why she told them that.

''There you are! Tasha these are the next door neighbours, they came to say hi to us.'' Rachael told Tasha.

I looked round to see Tasha checking the Guys out, making me laugh. I mean they were quite fit actually, but I was here for one reason only. To get my sex god. I had been waiting for about eight years after all!!!

''Oh hi.'' Tasha said casually, sounding in shock almost, making me laugh. I walked back into the house to go and put my clothes away then, leaving them to it. I had lots of summer clothes after I had brought the whole shop up at Primark ready for when I moved here.

I put on my cool, hello kitty top and trousers which were nice and cool after they were cotton too. I went to bed, reading my book of breaking dawn, before going to sleep. I felt really tired now, and I knew that in the morning, I had to ring the office where I would be working in a day, and working on my writing.

I was excited but I was bloody nervous too. I mean, it was going to be a big thing; working in LA. But I was twenty two now, and I felt brave enough to get on with it and get in the money to pay the rent for the house…

***


	2. Neighbours

I woke up early in the morning at nine, and I could tell that I was the only one awake, because it was totally silent in the house. I couldn't hear any movements at all around the house, and as I got up, I decided to get dressed before I went downstairs.

I got a shower in my room, after locking my bedroom door, and walked back into my bedroom to get changed, with a towel around me, and my hair. I put on some short denim shorts, black sandals, and a white top with black, loud writing on it.

I put on my '_Jackson Rathbone' _style hat, which Rachael liked on me. But of course she would like it. She was in love with Jackson Rathbone so she was bound to be in love with my Jackson Rathbone styled hat.

I dried my hair and curled it, before walking downstairs to find Rachael sat at the kitchen table. ''Oh hello,'' I said to her casually, shocked that Rachael would be up so early. Usually, she would be in bed until much later. The last up in fact.

''Good morning,'' she replied enthusiastically, grinning happily at me. I snickered under my breathe in response. Surely Rachael must have been drinking to be so happy at this time in the morning.

It wasn't truly natural for her. Usually, she'd mutter back a reply, not happy that it was so early in the morning at all, even if it was past eleven, but today…today she was in a very happy mood. It was nice to see.

''I'm surprised that you're up so early.'' I commented as I walked to the fridge to get the milk out for my cereal. I poured it into the bowl, and put it back into the fridge again. She laughed from the kitchen table in response.

''It's a new change. We're in LA now, and the sooner that we find our sex gods, the sooner we can start partying!'' I laughed in response because it was true.

''Oh hell yeah!'' I agreed, making us both laugh then. We both eat our cereal, and walked round with Tasha and Kirsty to our neighbours house after they had invited us there. Well…invited Tasha, but she had promised us that they had invited us all round there.

''Hi, come in.'' They said enthusiastically as they opened the front door to find us there. I smiled at them in response, and followed the Girls into the door nervously. I felt a little bit out of place being here if I was honest, because I knew for a fact that Tasha had the hots for one of them, and I was sure that Kirsty fancied the other one.

But me? I was too busy pining for sex god. Yeah it was alright, but the only person who I wanted to be meeting and chatted up by was sex god himself. That would just be the world's greatest gift to me if that ever happened.

Not that it would or anything.

''Thanks!'' the Girls said happily, walking into they're hallway. It looked really messy, with shoes on the floor, and coats hung up everywhere on the hallway pegs. We all walked into the kitchen, where Phil was.

The kitchen was quite messy too actually; with papers all over the round kitchen table. ''Oh hi Girls, ready for a good day then?'' Phil asked us. I smiled, suddenly so excited just to get out there.

''Yeah, so boys, where are you taking us?'' Rachael asked them playfully, taking a seat at the kitchen table.

''Well is everyone going because we have a lot to show you!'' Phil promised us. ''Especially clubs to go out.'' He added.

I noticed Kirsty smile at Phil and then quickly look away, bless her. She looked embarrassed after he had smiled at her.

I wanted to come with them, but in the end I chickened out of it. After all, I did have my new job to ring up and see too. I wanted to make sure that it was done and out of the way with. Because then I wouldn't feel so nervous about it.

I got home, and took a seat on one of our comfy living room sofa, ringing the office number where I would be working today. It was strange getting used to the American numbers too, but I was getting there…slowly.

''Hello?'' A posh lady's voice asked, instantly making me freeze and not sure what to say. _Just go with it_; I told myself internally.

''Ur…hello. It's Charlie here, urm…I had spoken to you on the phone a few days ago about starting at the writing workplace?'' Shit, I described that excellently, not.

''That's right. Yes, if you come in at nine tomorrow morning, Sam will give you a tour of the building, and then you'll get to meet our author for teenage books, Elizabeth Samson.'' The Lady explained.

''Okay then, well I'll see you tomorrow.''

''Yeah, bye.'' She agreed, putting the phone down. I jumped from the sofa, clapping my hand together excitedly at the very thought of having a job that worked on my dream; story writing. It really was my dream coming true, and on that note; I rang my Mum to tell her…and rub it in a little bit, of course.

***


	3. New Job

**I woke up early in the morning in my eager rush to get to work. Well, early for me anyway. My alarm went off at six, but it wasn't until seven when I finally managed to drag myself out of bed in time to go to work.**

**I hadn't actually been up this early since I was back in England, going to college, and getting there for half past eight in the morning. I had started to get used to have lie ins but I wasn't complaining about the early start. **

**I was far too excited about this new job, and what would or could come out of it to complain about being tired or anything unimportant like that. **

**I got a shower and washed my hair quickly, drying it, and straightening it, and leaving it like that because I was too nervous to mess about with it or anything today. I checked that my side-fringe looked okay and went to get dressed in my room. **

**I wore something that I would normally wear in England, something that I was comfortable in, as that was what it was about. When going to work, it was good to wear something that you would be comfortable in, especially as I would be there all day. **

**I put on a white top, with buttons at the front, and small, delicate frills on the front of it. It was a very pretty top, and it was something that I would definitely wear. I put on some lightened blue jeans too, with black and white converses to match. **

**I also grabbed my long-sleeved, white cardigan, with buttons on the front, as it was thin material, and folded it into the shoulder bag that I was taking with me to work after packing my lunch ready for the day. **

**I walked out of the front door and walked to work as it wasn't so far away from the house, and it was better to walk rather than get the bus. That would be my new promise; to do more walking instead of getting the bus. **

**I arrived at work fifteen minutes early and went straight to reception. It was very posh in here with marble flooring, and marble walls. Even the reception was made of a light brown marble, which was very cool.**

**The receptionist walked me over to the lift and took me up to the floor that I would need to go on, as it was my first day and there was too receptionists on the desk. **

**One was called Maggie, and was in her forties, with pretty, tied-up blonde hair, and a very professional look about her. She had on a black suit, white shirt, and black trousers, and she stayed at the reception. **

**The lady that offered to show me to the floor that I would be working on was very pretty. She was in her twenties, no older than thirty, most definitely. She had straightened blonde hair, and she was wearing a casual rock top, and jeans, with black high heels. **

**She was very small at about five foot three, and her name was Sally. **

''**So, you're from England then, right?'' She asked me curiously as we stepped into the lift. I nodded my head in response. She had a twinge to her accent, but it was definitely a Los Angeles kinda accent. **

''**Wow, I never thought that I'd get to meet someone from England…I'd love to meet Rob Pattinson though.'' She added, giggling hysterically as she mentioned the name. He was my sex god, and now, I just had to talk about him. **

''**Oh my god…no way!'' I replied, not able to control myself. She eyed me confused, before grinning in response, and nodding her small head. ''I'm like the **_**hugest**_** fan of Rob. I've been a fan of him since like Harry Potter even though he was a big head in it.'' I huffed as I thought about it because it was true. **

''**But that's not his fault; that's the character he had to play.'' I added quickly, because that too was true. ''But yeah, I've been in love with him for what…eight years now.'' I added, blushing embarrassedly. **

''**Hey Girl, don't be embarrassed about it! We need more people like you to stay loyal. I love it when I meet a fan like me, that has actually loved him since the beginning, instead of loving him for playing a hot Edward Cullen-''**

''**-Same as!'' I agreed, still shocked that we had this in common. She giggled with me, before forcing herself to stop, and mashing her cherry-blossom coloured lip gloss together, as if thinking about something. **

''**I really hate it though that they love him because of a bloody character. It's like jeez, get a grip. EDWARD'S NOT REAL!''**

''**Oh my god, I know!'' I agreed, because it fucking bothered me too. ''I mean why would you run up to someone who's a normal human with bitten necks, just to try and get him to suck your blood? I mean that's gross!''**

''**Ewe,'' she agreed, pulling a face. ''You're right, that is absolutely disgusting. I would never do that if I met him, in fact I'd probably scream until I went blue, and then fainted.'' She added, making me laugh. **

''**Same as.'' I agreed, laughing with her. ''Well either that or throw myself at him, and get arrested.'' I admitted, making her laugh. **

''**So I take it you're a twilight fan then?'' I asked her curiously. **

''**Oh hell yeah, and if Edward was real, then obviously I would be happy to have him, and you have Rob!'' She admitted, making me laugh again. **

''**Thanks.''**

''**Don't mention it, hon.'' She grinned at me, winking. **

''**So Edward is you're fave character then?'' I asked her curiously. **

**She thought on that for a moment, mashing her lips together again, before replying. ''Urm…yeah. Although there is something about Jasper, he just…hmm yeah, he has that look about him. But Edward's the one for me.'' She admitted. **

''**So if you see someone with auburn hair, a devilishly gorgeous face, and asking for someone named Sally; direct him here please.'' She requested, making me laugh. **

''**Okay.'' I agreed jokingly. **

''**Obviously he's not real, but…damn, its such a shame.'' She added, making me laugh again in response. **

**Unfortunately, we were at my floor already, which wasn't a lot of time for us to talk anymore. She walked me out of the lift and I looked around to find it looking like a normal office. But so much more cooler. **

**There was an old looking receptionist at the reception desk in front of the lift with round glasses on, and dark, cropped hair. Sally told the receptionist who I was, and left me to it, promising to see me at twelve, my lunch hour. **

**A young lady with wavy hair tied up in a ponytail came over. She had jeans on too, and a casual top, and had a nice, kind look about her as she smiled at me. She had converses too, like how I had. **

''**I'm Sam, and you must be Charlie?'' She asked me unsure. I nodded, and shook her hand after she had offered me it to shake. She looked very young, at about my age, about twenty five or so years old. **

''**Well if I give you a quick tour around here, so you know where you're going, and then you can meet our author who works here; Elizabeth Samson.'' she explained to me. I nodded, and followed her round. **

**She showed me where they publish the books that successful authors makes, and where people work in all the offices, not just doing writing fiction. Some were checking websites, and had their own fan fiction pages for people to write stories and stuff. **

''**Hey, you're Charlie, the new girl!'' I looked round to see a young Guy speaking, and walking towards me. I smiled, blushed, and looked away quickly. I was always blushing when someone spoke so loudly like that to me. **

''**Hey, I'm Liem Henshaw.'' He walked up to me. He had a grin on his slightly tanned face. He had cool blue eyes, and dark, almost black hair, which was flattened down but still really looked cool. **

**He had small ears, and was wearing a plain, grey vest, and jeans. ''That's Liem with an E, not Liem with an A.'' He added, laughing in that manly voice that he had. ''People always get that wrong.'' He added sadly. **

''**Well hi Liem, and yeah, I'm Charlie.'' I added casually, making him laugh too. **

''**Have you shown her to her office yet?'' He asked Sam. **

''**Well no, I was just going to-''**

''**-I'll do it.'' He promised her, interrupting her. He ignored her rolling her eyes to the ceiling, and I followed Liem into the next office along. It had two desks in the small room, and on the left side of the room was two people. **

**Sat on the chair was a pretty, blonde haired girl, with short hair. She had a grey cap on, and was very pretty and look looking. She had black eyeliner on, and red lipstick, and had a black and yellow scarf around her neck.**

**She wore a white, casually plain vest, and a skirt and high heels, and she was glaring at the Man in front of her. He too looked very young, and he had on a clingy, white vest to fit his muscles, and had spiky, blonde hair. **

**His skin had a very light tan to it, and he wore skinny fitted jeans, with casual, but very expensive, white trainers. **

''**Oh fuck off Blake. You weren't complaining last week when I was chatting you up, and you certainly weren't complaining last night.'' The Girl told him, shouting the words at him and totally ignoring our entrance. **

**She had a twinge of a Irish accent, mixed in with an American accent too, telling me that she must have moved out here. **

''**Spread anymore lies about me Olivia, and you'll be out of here.'' Blake warned her. ''The only reason why I was flirting with you last week was to make Brina jealous last week. And as for last night, I was at my parents house, so.''**

''**Yeah well-''**

**Liem cleared his throat loudly, telling them that we were there. They both looked at us in shock, and Liem smiled at them both. ''This is the new Girl. Charlie. Olivia, you're sharing with Charlie, so just try and be nice, will you?'' Liem told her, glaring at her. **

**She rolled her dark eyes in response. ''Whatever Liem. It's about time you got laid and had some fun, isn't it?'' She huffed at him, snickering in response as Liem frowned at her. **

''**I'm warning you Olivia Brendington-''**

''**-Alright, alright; jeez, no need to use my full name to threaten me, buddy!''**

**Liem sighed heavily as Blake walked out of the room in response, and turned to look at me. ''Will you be okay here?'' he asked me. I was about to nod, before Olivia carried on speaking again, cutting me off. **

''**She'll be fine; I don't bite!'' She stated, grinning at us both as we turned to look at her. Liem sighed and smiled at me. I smiled back, and watched him walk out of the door, before I took my seat on the right side of the room on the spinning chairs. **

''**So I hear you're from London, Charlie.'' Olivia commented as I turned the computer on. I turned a little bit and smiled at her. **

''**Not London; Peterborough which is near London.'' I replied, not knowing what else to say. She nodded, and went back to writing on her keyboard. **

''**By the way, don't take any notice of the conversation you just heard. Blake is the biggest scum in this office building.'' She warned me. I nodded, and typed in what it said I should on a piece of paper on my desk, where it began to log me in. ''As for Liem…he has the hots for Sally; you know the receptionist?'' She explained to me. **

**I nodded. ''Yeah, she came with me in the lift.'' I replied, waiting for the computer to hurry up. At least they were faster than the computers in England. **

''**Yeah, her. She's just broke up with her Boyfriend, but apparently she really fancies Liem too.'' She told me, giving the gossip out. **

''**I'm not being rude, but…why are you telling me all this?'' I asked her confused. I mean it was the work gossip and I was just the new girl. Olivia thought on that one for a long time, chewing busily on her chewing gum, and finally shrugged. **

''**You seemed pretty cool, and not like the other bitches in here.'' She added, turning to glare out of the big windows in front of us. **

**I nodded, and went quiet again, feeling awkward about the information that I had been given by this Olivia. It wasn't my place to know about went one, as I was here to work. I didn't even know these people so the last thing I could do was judge, but with Olivia…she was loud, and seemed unbothered about what the others said. **

**And she clearly hated them all. **

**However she gave me all the gossip on the people the worked here, even though it really wasn't my place. There was Aidan who had a crush on Nikki, Nikki who was dating Dean. Olivia who fancied Dean, and apparently Dean fancies Olivia…then there was Blake who fancied Sabrina, (Brina for short) big time, Brina who was very shy, and didn't talk to Blake who fancied her, and was trying to make her jealous…then there was Brooke who had this big thing for Jared, who had just got here, and Liem who fancied Sally kept himself to himself. Everyone besides Sam had all this going on. **

''**See, I told you it was all very complicated, didn't I?'' Olivia winked at me, grinning contently as I took all of this in. It was the way she described it; for her loud, unbothered attitude, she made it sound nice…kinda. **

''**God yeah.'' I agreed, still in shock. **

**She laughed. ''I'm sorry about this morning. I'm not truly a bitch, and me and Blake definitely did not sleep together. I say this shit because it makes people think I'm confident. Silly really, right?'' she asked me. **

**I shook my head. ''Not really…I can understand where you're coming from. I have a different way to make myself look complicated; make-up.''**

**She laughed. ''I should change my attitude really. Everyone in here hates me.''**

''**Well have lunch with me in the staff room. I'll get people to like you through me, and not for sympathy, but because I think you're pretty awesome.'' She was. She was really nice after she gave the whole 'I-don't-care-what-you-think-as-long-as-you-give-me-what-I-want' act away from her cool attitude. **

''**Well alright, but expect to get jeered when you walk in there with me.'' She warned me with an unhappy laugh. I laughed with her in response. **

''**I'll take my chance.''**

''**Fair enough, but I warned you.'' She sighed. ''I'll be back in a minute, just going to the bathroom.'' she told me, leaving me there to finish off my last **_**tainted soul **_**chapter before I sent it off to this Elizabeth Samson person. **

*******


	4. Meeting Rob Pattinson

**I was just going to get up and grab a blue plastic cup and some ice cold water from the water machine in our office when a Girl walked into our office. Her strange, green-grey eyes went wide automatically behind black rimmed glasses. **

**She had long, black hair, which was beautifully straight. She wore a pink , strappy top, with skinny jeans, and shiny pink high heels which made her feet look absolutely gorgeous. She had a beautiful pale look about her skin, which was almost of a porcelain color. **

**She smiled apologetically at me and instantly took a step back towards the office door, a look of shock on her face as she looked around the room again. I watched and smiled encouragingly at her. If she was meant to be here then she shouldn't be letting little me bother her. **

''**Oh, I'm so sorry…do you know where Olivia is?'' She asked me shyly, having another look around the office room self consciously. **

''**Ur yeah, she's just gone to the bathroom. She'll be back in a second.'' I explained to her, keying in something to the computer. **

**She nodded. ''Okay, well is it alright if I wait for her here?'' She asked me in the same, girly sounding, American accent that she had. **

''**Well sure…I'm just the new Girl.'' I admitted with an easy laugh. She laughed too, shy and quietly. **

''**Oh, you're Charlie, right?''**

''**Yeah.''**

''**Well I'm Sabrina, Brina for short.'' She told me, grinning. Ah, so this was the crush of Blake, the Guy who had been trying to make her jealous. ''I work in the office opposite.'' she added, explaining to me. **

''**Okay, well it was nice meeting you.'' I smiled politely. **

**I met loads of people in my lunch hour, before I went out with Olivia to look around the near shops of Los Angeles. There was Aidan, who shared a office with Brina, opposite us. He had short, cropped, dark hair, and had a really cute, baby look face about him. **

**Then there was Brooke, who came with us to have a look around Los Angeles, and she was new here, like me. She had only just got her a few weeks before me, and had freshly moved from Texas. **

**She had a very pretty face; with black mascara and eyeliner on, and a tanned look about her. She had long, light blonde hair and a pretty smile. She was also very out-going, and loved cowboy hats, as proven when she wore one out with us to go shopping. **

**And she also had the biggest crush on Jared, who worked there. He was also from Texas, but he had moved there two years ago, and worked here since. He had a beautifully pale face, and also liked wearing cowboy hats, covering his short, curled, light brown hair. **

**Olivia had a crush on a Guy called Dean, but was too scared to go and speak to him, because he was really shy too, and she thought he would hate her because of all the rumours about her, flying about the office, bless her. **

**He had short, dark hair, cropped, and had a beautiful, manly look about him. He looked really nice too, bless him, and after smiling shyly at her, and ducking his head again quickly, out of embarrassment. **

**There was also Nikki too, who was very beautiful and reminded me of Brina a little bit. She had dark brown hair, almost black hair. She wore black rimmed glasses, and a pale face and she was quite shy like Brina too. **

**However, I was glad that it was the end of the day soon, because although I had a good first day, I couldn't wait to get home and just rest. I walked to our new house, MP3 in my ear, listening to Rob Pattinson-Let Me Sign very loudly. **

**I took the headphones out of my ear after the song was finished, all the while thinking about how amazing Rob's voice was, and walked into our garden, putting my MP3 away in my bag as I strolled to the front house. **

''**CHARLIE!'' I looked around in shock, hearing Rachael's booming voice coming from behind me. She was looking at me shocked as she walked into the garden, making me confused. What was up with her?**

''**I've been calling you for the last five minutes now. And Jesus, I have been getting the strangest looks!'' She added angrily, huffing, making me laugh. **

''**Bless. Sorry, I was listening to Rob singing **_**Let Me Sign**_**. Fuck, he has an amazing voice!'' I admitted. **

''**I bet his voice isn't the only think you like.'' Rachael commented with a snicker. **

**I laughed, unable to stop myself, because I certainly knew what she was thinking about. ''Oh hell no; god, his body as well. Wow.'' **

**Rachael laughed in response this time. ''And Jackson too. Ooh!'' She commented back, making me laugh again in response. **

**We walked into the house to hear Kirsty and Tasha talking upstairs. I walked into my bedroom to go and get changed, because I felt awful now that I had been wearing these clothes all day long, and it was hot out, which made it worse too. **

**I went back downstairs after having a shower and changing my clothes, and went downstairs to the living room where all the Girls were. Tasha looked pretty as she was going out on her date with Adam, and she left then, after he knocked on the door.**

**We all sat down and put the **_**Breaking Dawn **_**movie on, like how we used to always watch when we were in England. I felt a little guilty about watching Tasha's own sex god; Kellan whilst Tasha was out, but then I thought again…she was probably enjoying herself anyway. **

**It wasn't my fault if I wanted to see my sex god, Rob, and Kellan just happened to be in the movie too. I was only watching for that gorgeous hunk of a Man, named Robert Thomas Pattinson. God, he looked so fit in this; especially as he had his top off half the time. **

''**I'd love to be Bella in this film.'' I admitted after Bella and Edward had just woken up from making love for the first time. The jealousy was still definitely there; crazy but impossible to ignore. **

''**God, she's so lucky. Having Rob all over!'' I complained, catching Rachael roll her eyes in the corner of my eyes. **

''**Darling, just think that none of this is real. This is Edward, and that is Bella. They are not Rob and Kristen…even if he probably has fucked her in real life.'' I gasped in shock as Rachael actually said that out loud and in front of me. **

''**They have not **_**fucked**_**! Kristen is still with Michael, and Rob is still single!'' I defended, ignoring the jealousy I felt due to the fact that that could have been true. **

''**Yeah exactly Darling, and look at the state of Michael. Either Rob is gay or them two are secretly dating.'' I threw my pillow at her, and turned around, shaking my head furiously as I tried to concentrate on the film again without feeling jealous. Didn't work. **

''**Rob is not gay…and even if he was, I could change him.'' I added, winking playfully at Rachael. **

''**Oh, I bet you could darling.'' She replied, making us both laugh in response. We were both thinking the same thing. **

''**I heard that Rob, Jackson and Kellan are supposed to be in the area, you know.'' Kirsty commented casually after the film ended. Me and Rachael both stole a glance at Kirsty, both probably wondering why she hadn't said anything sooner. **

''**Thanks for telling us sooner Kirsty!'' Rachael commented, huffing angrily at her. Kirsty rolled her eyes in response. **

''**They have a new house in the area, and they've been walking around here.'' She confirmed, before adding; ''We could go and find them tomorrow, if you like-'' But Kirsty didn't get to finish her sentence; me and Rachael screamed, jumping up from the sofa, and bouncing around the living room. **

''**OH MY GOD!!!!'' Me and Rachael shouted together. ''WE'RE GOING TO MEET OUR SEX GODS!'' We said together again, making us both laugh in response. **

''**Great minds, great friends, and greater sex gods!'' I reminded her of what we used to say as the Twilight Buds making us both laugh again; the excitement of it all going straight to our heads and doing funny things to our heads. **

''**Definitely darling!'' She agreed, making me laugh again. **

''**Oh shit, I have work tomorrow!'' I complained with a groan. **

''**Just take the day off, I'm going to.'' Rachael told me with a shrug. **

''**But its only our second day-''**

''**-So. Where would you rather be; with our sex gods or working?'' She asked me. Well on that question…**

''**Well yeah….alright then, I'll take the day off.'' I agreed, making Rachael squeal and hug me to her. **

**I laughed, and we all rang up our work afterwards, before laughing after we had finished. This was so exhilarating, lying, especially as we would be meeting our sex gods tomorrow. Hopefully. God, how exciting!!!**

**Rachael looked up on the internet and saw that they all had houses around here, in the area luckily. I got on the sofa and jumped about, too excited to sit down. I knew that I wouldn't get much sleep tonight, I was far too excited. **

''**Girls, it's nice that you care but please!'' Tasha complained as she walked into the living room with Rachael hot on her tail, making me laugh. **

''**Sorry; we're just so happy for you!'' Rachael defended herself. **

''**I know, but can we talk about something else…like what are we doing tomorrow?'' Tasha asked us confused. **

**that's where I cut in. ''Well we were talking about that, when you were out. We want to go and look for our sex gods. So please Tasha, can we?'' I begged in the same over excited voice, giggling again at the thought of it. **

''**I don't mind, but where do we look?'' Tasha asked us confused. **

''**Well…it's good that we have the internet because they all have a place near here. And it wont take all day to find.'' Rachael replied, grinning at me. I grinned back, thrilled by this idea of meeting our sex gods. **

''**Cool….so what time are we leaving then?'' Tasha asked us, as I started to bounce on the sofa again like a big kid. **

''**As soon as we are all up.'' Rachael told her, making me squeal in delight. ''Adam can come with us, if you want?'' Rachael suggested, though I had to admit that I kinda hoped he didn't, because this was our thing, as the twilight buds. **

''**No, it's okay. I want to do this with you Guys.'' Tasha told us, making me squeal again in absolute delight. **

''**Okay then.'' Rachael agreed, and I screamed again, sending everybody deaf. I couldn't help it though, because I was so delighted at the thought of meeting my very own sex god. It was a complete dream come true. **

**We stayed up in the living room until ten thirty, all talking about tomorrow, and how exciting it was going to be, and everyone was a bit unsure, not sure whether we were going to see them or not. **

''**Of course we are going to see them, we just have to.'' I told them all, making them laugh in response. But I had the complete and utter faith that I would see my sex god, because I had a very good feeling about it. **

**I went to get a glass of chilled milk to take up to bed with me then, with my teddy bear Esme in hand, and I went to sleep after watching half of the Haunted Airman with my very own sex god in it himself. **

**I went to sleep then, praying that I got to saw my sex god tomorrow, like I so desperately hoped that I would…**

**I got up from my bed, actually jumping up which was a first for me. I just didn't do mornings usually, but today was going to be different. Today I was going to be meeting sex god, I knew that I would. **

**I put on a blue, pretty dress with pink and white different flowers on it, which was really pretty, and pulled on some flip flops, before walking downstairs after I had a shower. I had breakfast quickly, and when Rachael came downstairs, I went out with her and had a cigarette. **

**I screamed as we lit up our cigarettes. ''Oh my god, I'm so excited that we are actually getting to meet our sex god!'' I shouted, jumping once and making Rachael laugh as she took a long inhale of her cigarette. **

''**Me too darling. Ooh, and when I met Jackson, ooh!'' She laughed as she pictured it in her head, and I laughed along easily with her. **

''**I know, god, it's going to be amazing.'' I agreed with her, ecstatic about this. I absolutely couldn't wait. **

**After we had our cigarette, Kirsty came down, and we were waiting thirty minutes for Tasha to come downstairs. And as she walked into the kitchen, where we were all waiting impatiently, I wasn't happy to see that she still needed to get dressed. **

''**About time, we were just going to come in and wake you up!'' I warned her, annoyed that she had taken so long to wake up. It had been time wasted, and we could have been out there by now, searching for our lovers. **

''**Girls, its nine, god!'' She complained, sitting next to Kirsty at the breakfast table, without a care in the world, as Kirsty rolled her eyes in response. **

**I frowned unhappily at them both. What did they think that were doing, just sat there doing nothing? Tasha could have been in the bathroom already, getting ready to go out and see our lovers. **

''**So what? Look, we have to go now if you want to get back and go and see Adam?'' I warned Tasha, who all but ignored me. **

''**Oh talking about Adam…he has just been around here to give his number. Bless him, that's a really nice lad that you've got there Tasha!'' Kirsty joked, handing Tasha the paper with his number on. **

''**I know.'' Tasha agreed, grinning back at Kirsty. **

''**TASHA PLEASE!'' I begged her, shouting at her to try and get ready. I wanted to get out of this house as soon as, so that we could go meet our sex gods, and as in…now!**

''**Okay, I'm going to get dressed now, god!'' She complained again, rolling her eyes at me. I just grinned in response, happy again now. Because we would be meeting our sex gods for the first time, and this was my actual dream come true. **

**I couldn't wait to actually get to meet my sex god, and I knew that we would. I had faith, what with them living so close to us. It was going to happen, I knew that it was. I had the best possible feeling about this. **

''**Shall we let her eat her breakfast first? I mean it is a bit rushed.'' Kirsty asked me. I frowned at her and shook my head. **

''**No, just a grab a cereal bar or something in the cupboard please, because it will only mean more time spent wasting it here. If we miss them, then I will be so disappointed, and you know that I will be absolute furious-''**

''**-Okay, okay, I'm packing a cereal bar for her.'' Kirsty confirmed, interrupting me, as she got up from the breakfast table, and grabbing a cereal bag and an apple and putting in her bag for Tasha. Rachael laughed at me in response to my eagerness. **

''**I'm at the front door first!'' Rachael shouted in a rush to get their first. I laughed with her and followed her out of the kitchen door, pushing her out of the way. **

''**Actually I am, so ha!'' I replied as I slid into the wall next to the front door. Rachael slid into me as she tried to copy the move. **

''**OW!'' We both shouted together, because we had just crashed into together, before we both laughed. **

**Kirsty rolled her eyes at me in response, and stood next to Rachael whilst we waited for Tasha to walk downstairs. Finally, after ten minutes, Tasha walked down the stairs, dressed and ready to go. **

**She frowned at us in response to us waiting near the door. ''So I'm not allowed anything to eat?'' She asked us, huffing in response. **

**I rolled my eyes. ''Yeah, Kirsty got you something in her bag for you.'' I told her, already opening the door for us to go. Me and Rachael were in front, and I took her arm in mine, so deliriously happy that not only was it so sunny and hot like usual in LA, but we were also **_**definitely**_** going to be seeing our sex gods today. **

**I was at war with myself internally not to scream over the idea of it, and it was very hard not to. I knew that I'd probably scream at Rob if I actually did see him. I mean, he was my very own sex god, and I would probably be in shock when I did see him. **

''**We are so going to see our sex gods today.'' I told Rachael as we walked out of our front gates, grinning at her in response. **

**Her smile instantly brightened up, turning into a full grin. ''Oh hell yes.'' She agreed with me, making us both laugh. **

''**I hope that we're not walking all day!'' Kirsty shouted at us, huffing. I rolled my eyes, even though she couldn't see me do it, because she was behind me. I ignored her anyway, and followed the path round to the end of the road, before crossing. **

''**I don't think that we will. Rach will get bored of walking in the heat!'' Tasha replied, making both me and Rachael huff in response. **

''**I don't think that I will darling, not when I know that Jackson is waiting for me.'' Rachael whispered to me. I giggled in response. **

''**Oh I bet he will be.'' I agreed with her, making us both laugh again in response. I think this sun was doing funny things with my brain, because it certainly felt like it at the minute. I felt drunk on air, but I wondered if that was just because of the excitement of it all. **

**We carried on walking for what felt like ages, even though I knew it had only been something like an hour or two, definitely not any longer. But I kept everyone going, despite them moaning about how hot it was and how they didn't want to walk anymore, because I knew that they had to be here somewhere. **

**We had the street where the Guys were supposed to live on, and it was supposed to be near to where we lived, so I knew that it couldn't possibly be very much further for us to walk. Just a little further. **

**In the end, Tasha started to ask people about Rob and Kellan and Jackson, but they didn't understand. I huffed in response as we asked them about where they lived, as Tasha commented that we might not be asking right. **

''**How hard is it to get? There's only one fucking Rob Pattinson!'' I complained, the sun getting to my head. **

**Tasha rolled her eyes, but we carried on walking for a while, whilst Rachael started to complain. I hoped we saw them, before everyone went home, otherwise it would be just me walking this fucking path, and I wouldn't have a clue what to say to them if I saw them on my own. **

''**Girls, I'm getting to the end of this road, if we don't see anything, then I'm going home.'' Tasha complained, making me whine under my breathe in response. Disappointment filled me in response. **

''**Me too.'' Rachael complained, breathless. **

**I frowned, and kept my gaze on the floor, trying to convince myself that we would see something, anything that would get us closer to our sex gods, by the end of this winding road.**

**Rachael gasped, but I bet that was only because she was about to moan about the warmth of today again, so I kept my head down, all the while begging that we would see something soon, anything soon. **

''**Girls, you need to look now…please!'' Rachael begged us all, making me confused. I looked up and gasped in shock at what I saw. OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**Getting out a flash, black limo was Kellan, in a grey vest, black beanie, and skinny jeans, but my eyes were already on the gorgeous Man climbing out of the car behind Kellan. Oh my bloody god!!!**

**Sex god was there in a casual, blue and grey striped shirt, with a grey polo neck vest underneath the shirt. He had on light blue jeans, and converses like how he usually wore, and he had a plastic cup in his right hand with a straw in it. **

**His short hair looked amazing, all spiked up and gorgeous, and he had his perfect sunglasses on again, to match my own, which I had on too. **

**I screamed then, because I just couldn't help myself. I couldn't stop myself screaming his name, making it so obvious. I looked away and blushed a tomato red blush, and giggled helplessly into Rachael's right arm. **

**She laughed in response, and I turned around to see Rob and Kellan looking over here now. Kellan waved at us politely whilst Rob ran his hand through the top of his hair, looking embarrassed, which only made me scream again. **

**God, why did I have to scream for? Oh yeah, because he was a total freaking sex god, and I so badly wanted to tear his clothes off…but I could control myself, I was sure of it. **

''**Can we have a picture please?'' I shouted, instantly shocking myself because I had actually asked them. I blushed bright red, but watched as Kellan nodded, and waved us over there to see them. **

**We walked over there, with me in front, dying to get over there. I felt Kirsty trying to hold me back, making me groan in frustration. What did she think I was going to do? Jump on Rob? I mean I would only do that if he asked me out, which he wasn't going to, so she was safe, for god sake!**

''**Oh my god, is that actually happening?'' I asked the Girls in shock as we walked over there, whilst I tried not to hyperventilate in shock. **

''**Yep, so smile.'' Tasha told me, catching up with me and Rachael. I nodded, taking a deep breathe. **

''**Urm…okay.'' I agreed unsure, smiling. I pushed my Rob Pattinson sunglasses back onto my eyes properly, and we finally got over to them. My eyes instantly went to Rob, to see that he was watching us, unsure. **

''**Hello Girls.'' Kellan greeted us, winking playfully. I giggled in response, because Kellan's confidence was quite hot. He was so cool when he did that on television, and I knew that it got Tasha in a flush, same as Rob did to me. **

''**Hi.'' I heard Tasha say, sounding as though she was in a bit of a muddle, making me laugh again in response. Rob continued to watch us, like Kellan, but when I laughed, he looked to me. I blushed and quickly looked at the floor. **

**I had to, I couldn't stand anyone looking at me, especially not my idol; my sex god, Rob. God, it was too much!!**

''**So who wants a picture then?'' I looked up after hearing Kellan ask us. **

**Rachael got out her phone ready then. ''Tasha would love one.'' She admitted. **

''**Okay.'' Kellan agreed easily, and I watched as Tasha took her place next to Kellan, for the picture, as I looked on, at Rob. **

''**Robert, will you have a picture done with Charlie?'' Kirsty asked her, making me shocked. I turned round, and stared at her, wide eyed, and flushed bright red. She just rolled her eyes at me in response. **

''**Ur yeah, sure.'' He agreed, sounding shy, bless him. I got pushed to him by Kirsty, and my heart instantly sped up as I reached his side. He smiled at me shyly in response, and I smiled back, before blushing red. **

**I stood by his side, not really sure what I should do, or if I should put my arm around him or whatever, and Kirsty noticed my awkwardness and rolled her eyes at me in response, which was easy for her to do. **

**If she was meeting Aston, then she would be just as embarrassed as me right now. So she couldn't roll her eyes at my embarrassment. ''Can you move a bit closer please, my screen isn't big enough, sorry.'' Kirsty apologized even though I knew that she was totally lying. **

''**Ur…sure.'' Rob replied awkwardly, as I nodded in response. Kirsty shot me a smile, and I knew why. She was doing it on purpose, but I wasn't going to be complaining any time soon. I moved closer to him, as did he, when I felt his hand rest at his side awkwardly, like he wasn't sure what he should do with it. **

**I blushed, tried to compose myself, and gave a half smile to the camera. I felt a thrill of delight run in me due to the fact that I was actually standing next to my sex god lover. My arm was also at my sides, and I felt a small, pleasant warmth radiating from him, though I think that was probably just me. **

**Because the excitement of it all, standing next to Rob-my very own sex god, and hero-and just that was making my heart beat erratically in my chest. It was so loud that I was sure that everyone hear could hear it. **

''**Done.'' Kirsty grinned at us both, putting her mobile back in her pocket. ''Charlie.'' She called, pushing me to her. I gasped in shock, but she pretended to hug me, as she said in my ear; ''This is your chance. Ask him out or something.'' She warned me, making me even more shocked. **

**I couldn't do that! For one thing, I was far too shy, and for another, he would probably just think that I'm a weirdo. But I settled on speaking to him, making conversation whilst I still could. This was my only chance after all. **

''**I just want to say that,'' I started, turning round and catching his eyes straight away. He held my gaze; his smoldering coloured grey eyes burning into my brown ones. I looked down at my hands, instantly becoming embarrassed. **

''**Well er…that er…you're erm new film…looks…like really good. And er…if you wouldn't mind er…signing my Lost Summer book?'' I asked between stuttering. I felt so embarrassed, actually asking him this, and my heart beat into near overdrive as I waited impatiently for his answer. **

''**Ur yeah sure, do you have it on you?'' He asked me. **

''**Urm….yeah.'' I got it out of my bag, and passed it to him. He took my pen too, and started to try and write in the back of it. **

''**Ur…sorry can I just…'' he asked me, meaning leaning the book on my back. I nodded, feeling delighted. **

''**Hell yes.'' I replied, making him laugh. I giggled in response, taking in how musical and glorious his laughter was. I turned round, and let him lean on my back, to write whatever he was writing. **

''**Done.'' I heard him say. I turned around, and took the book off of him, holding his gaze as I did. He watched me back, smiling as I took the book and put it in my bag. **

''**Thanks.'' I replied, biting down hard on the edge of my bottom lip. He was still smiling at me as I put the book back into my bag, and looked back up at him. I blushed, feeling some kind of a…undeniable chemistry, something pulling me in, pulling me closer to him. **

**I didn't quite get it, but something about the way I was feeling…I had a feeling that it was probably just the way you felt after you had just met your hero, someone who you absolutely idolized, and had done for years, and now you had just met him. **

**Because it was that same feeling that was pulling me in, trying to get me to move closer to him. I failed to let my move though, because I knew that it was just me feeling this, and it made me feel stupid just thinking about it. **

**Finally, my attention turned back to everyone else, who was talking to themselves, just like how me and Rob were a moment ago. Rob looked to them too now, breaking our gaze, just like how I did. **

''**Well its been nice talking to you Girls, but we need to be going. See you around hopefully?'' Rob asked us. **

''**Oh, hell yeah!'' I said a bit too eagerly, making Rob and Kellan laugh. I hid my face, a blush sneaking up its way to my face. **

**They walked into the gates of their big house, where their Bodyguards were. They looked scary as they were dressed in black suits, and were tall and burly. They nodded their heads at Rob and Kellan as they disappeared through the gates. **

''**Did that just happen?'' I asked the Girls after we started walking to the bus stop to get the bus back. **

''**Yes, it bloody did!'' Rachael replied, making me laugh in response. I gazed back at the house, watching Rob and Kellan walk into their posh-looking house. **

''**They were so nice and friendly.'' I commented, smiling at the house. I mean; I knew that Rob was pleasant anyway, friendly, but…well, he was just lovely. Like…wow. I couldn't believe how down to Earth he was, especially as I was obviously a fan, and he didn't like the attention of fans very much at all. **

''**Yeah…lets walk over there.'' Kirsty commented, pointing to the bus stop. We got to the bus stop, and waited for the bus whilst we kept talking about what had just happened. We were all in shock about how nice they were, and I was definitely in shock at how fit Rob was. **

**God, he was so much more gorgeous looking in the flesh. **

**I didn't care about much anymore, because I had had my dream come true, and for that, I could die happy now. **

*******


	5. Club

We all decided to go out clubbing when we got home but that was mostly because Adam wanted to go clubbing with Tasha, and had invited us all along. I spent lots of time in my bedroom when I got home, getting ready to go out.

I got a shower and took my time with my hair, straightening it, and curling strands of hair so it looked nice, and I put on a dress which I wouldn't usually wear. It was blue, and sleeveless, and was a bit like a cocktail fit, and very fitting.

It was black coloured, so I put some nice, black heels with it, and walked downstairs to meet everyone in the kitchen. Tasha wasn't downstairs yet, so I knew that we had a bit of time to relax, before we went out.

''Wow Charlie,'' Rachael commented as I sat down at the kitchen table. I grinned at her, pleased that she had noticed.

''Thanks.'' I said, happy.

''Drink this. It will get you pissed.'' Rachael told me, handing me a glass with a small clear shot in it.

''Urm……..okay.'' I agreed, trying to work out why she was smiling at me like that. I drank it back, before instantly coughing on the taste. Rachael laughed and poured me a glass of WKD as I got over the burning, scorching pain in my throat.

''Here, have this, then you really will get drunk.'' I drank back the WKD and welcomed the tipsy feeling immediately. My head felt a little dizzy, but I didn't care. I loved getting drunk, especially as it made me more confident.

''Woot, I feel drunk.'' I commented, making Rachael laugh as she gave me another glass of WKD, which I instantly threw down my neck again.

Tasha walked into the kitchen then, and joined our drinking, just as the doorbell rang. Rachael ran to the door to answer it, shouting about it being something about Adam. I didn't quite hear right, because my hearing had died down now because of the alcohol.

Wow, I really was drunk already. That shot must have been as strong as it really tasted. It was vile, but I didn't care, because I was drunk already, and it was good to get as drunk as. Especially as it made me a confident, cool person.

We walked to the front door, with me holding Rachael's hand, as I was so drunk that I was stumbling along…alongside her. I got in the taxi with her, leaving Tasha and Adam to kiss outside, but Rachael started whining so Tasha had to get into the taxi.

I laughed in response, muttering something incoherent as we drove off to this club that we were going to. There was some new faces with us and they were Alex, Ben, Alice and Kerry. I laughed when they mentioned Alice.

''You're last name isn't Cullen, is it?'' I asked her drunkenly, slurring my words. Everyone laughed, including this Alice.

''No, it's Hughes.''

''Oh,'' I commented, disappointed, wanting another drink so bad now. ''Damn.'' I mumbled under my breathe, making everyone laugh again in response.

We got out then, with Alice in lead. ''Everyone this way!'' She commented, whilst Tasha looked unsure.

''Are you sure?'' She asked her, even though Tasha was drunk too.

''Yeah, my Brother owns this club, we all get free drinks, and we don't have to wait outside.'' Alice commented proudly as she took Tasha's hand in her own.

The club looked cool with bright lights and stuff, but I couldn't really see much else, because I still felt so badly pissed. ''Good evening Alice, nice to see you tonight.'' The Doorman said to Alice.

''Yep,'' she agreed drunkenly. ''Is my Brother here tonight?'' She asked him. He shrugged in response.

''I think so. I haven't seen him yet, have fun.'' He winked at her as he let us go in. I squealed in response, making Rachael laugh in response, as she took my hand in hers again and lead me into the club eagerly.

It was so cool, like a proper cool club, and I realized then that it was the first time I had been in a LA club. And it was so cool; with a huge dance-floor in the middle of the room, and everyone dancing to club music.

Tasha was leading the way to the dance-floor with Adam pulling her along, as we all got drinks in for us all. We got a huge table, and I drank back some drink that Rachael had given me. It was nice though, like fruity.

''So you having fun?'' Adam asked me curiously, smiling at me. He was cute, in a Boyish sort of way. He had short brown hair, which was spiked up, and a cheeky kinda smile, but there was only one Man for me.

''Hell yes. And I'm pissed, and its still early; Woot for me!'' I said, making him laugh. ''How about you?'' I asked him, as I started drinking from my drink again. It was so fruity, but already; I could feel the alcohol working all over me.

_Kiss me through the phone_ came on then though, and I was pulled to the dance-floor by Tasha, and I flashed an apologetic smile to Ben, who just grinned at me, and followed me over with the rest of his mates.

Rach was going wild, dancing to the next song which was _Lady Gaga _and _Just Dance_, and we all just cheered her on. She was hilarious when she was drunk. A new song came on after that which was a remix of _Let Me Sign _by Rob Pattinson himself, and I was really going for it, swinging my hips and getting into the beat when I heard Tasha talking to Rachael.

''Rachael, Kellan just got us a drink.''

''What, he's here, where?'' I heard Rachael ask. I turned to see Tasha point above us, and I stopped dancing for a moment, looking up and not expecting to see them there. Rob was standing there though, next to the balcony.

I blushed bright red when I saw that Rob had his eyes on me. Oh my god, how embarrassing, being caught dancing to his song, and proper going for it! I looked away quickly, and decided to just go for it.

I was twenty two and I'd look more pathetic if I just stood there doing nothing rather than if I looked cool, and really started dancing to it. I looked round in the corner of my eyes to see him still watching, so I carried on dancing, still blushing like mad.

I turned round then, and saw that Tasha was back on the dance floor. I smiled at her as she walked over.

''Umm…they want us to go and sit with them.'' Tasha admitted, pleased.

''Oh hell yeah, lets go, Jackson needs me!'' Rach told us, leading the way.

I huffed in response. ''Oh, I bet he does.'' I said to her, as we laughed together in response. She grabbed my hand and pulled me off of the dance floor, and pointed over to Rob again. I looked to see him still looking.

I blushed bright red again, and quickly looked away. ''See, Rob needs you too!'' She warned me, making me laugh again as we rushed up the stairs. They were in the VIP section, looking absolutely amazing as they waited for us.

Rob looked absolutely gorgeous in a smart black suit, trousers, and a white shirt which had a few buttons undone, and showed off his glorious, toned chest. I licked my lips in response, seeing that his hair was just as wild as ever, as he ran his hand through the top it.

I half-wanted to run over there and kiss him, and I mean proper kiss him, but I daren't. I was too shy to do anything like that, and he'd only think that I was mad, so there was really no point. I'd probably get arrested.

Rach ran over to Jackson, and as I was halfway over to Rob, he was out of the VIP doors, and onto the main hallway, meeting me halfway, and smiling at me.

''Hi.'' We said together. I laughed with him in response, because we both sounded as eager as each other to see each other again, though I knew that that was not possible. The only person who was happy to see who, was me to see Rob.

''Ugh…I didn't expect to see you here.'' I admitted sheepishly, not sure what else I should say to him. I mean what did you say to you're all time favourite hero who just happened to look as eager as I was at seeing him again.

''I know…I didn't expect to see you either. But Kellan suggested to buy you Girls some drinks, which I thought was a good idea.'' He admitted, his bottle of beer still frozen in his hands, after he had practically ran over to me.

My heart beat erratically in my chest, crashing loudly against the club music being played in this club, and it was only in response to Rob being so close to me. That electricity spark was back again, flowing freely around us, and leaving us in this bubble; safe from everyone outside it, and away from us.

That's what it felt like to me anyway.

''That was a lovely idea, so thank you, it was much app-apprec-appreciated.'' I finally got out, grinning at him as I stuttered the word out. I was only stuttering because I was a little pissed, and very nervous too.

He laughed in response, the sound free and beautiful. I could listen to him laugh all evening. ''Do you want to er…come and sit down?'' He asked me unsure.

''Urm hell yes, if you wouldn't mind, sex god?'' I gasped in response, quickly looking at the floor as my nickname slipped out. ''Urm-Urm-Urm….I'm just drunk. Ignore me.'' I begged him, blushing, and curing under my breathe out of embarrassment.

He just laughed in response, still sounding as happy as before. ''Urm okay…so do you want to sit down then?'' he checked.

I nodded, looking back in time as he walked back to VIP area slowly, giving me time to catch up with him. I followed him by his side, and sat down next to him on the sofa, still in shock about who exactly I was sitting next to.

I couldn't actually believe my luck.

I turned round on the seat to look at him, because the truth was, I couldn't keep my eyes off of him. He looked so much more gorgeous in the flesh if that was even possible, and I couldn't keep my eyes away from him.

''So do you still live in LA?'' I asked him after a minute, because it had been awkwardly silent for a while. As if we didn't know what to say to each other after we had practically ran to each other. Well, I had ran to him, actually.

''Yeah, I've been living here since I filmed twilight, but I go back to England a lot.'' He admitted, shifting closer a little bit. My heart sped into overdrive in response, booming against my chest as he casually put his arm on the rest behind us.

''Oh, er…cool.'' I replied, trying to catch my breathe. He smiled at me in response, a little shyly, and ran his hand through his hair just like how I had seen him do all the time on television. And yet, it looked so much hotter now that he was repeating the movement in front of me.

''So, are you a fan?'' he asked me curiously, probably guessing that I was, straight away. I didn't think that the fact that I screamed his name when I had met him helped either. That was a pure give away,

''Yeah,'' I admitted sheepishly, blushing bright red and looking down at my hands, embarrassedly. ''But I'm not your average crazy fan that bites her neck, or stalks you or anything.'' I added quickly, looking up and finding his gaze.

He grinned in response, before chuckling under his breathe too. He ran his hand through the top of his wild hair again, and reached for his bottle of beer, drinking a swig, and putting it back down on the table again.

''Well…it's funny that you should mention about the bitten necks. I still get that.'' He admitted, smiling. I watched him shocked, thinking that he was joking.

''No way.'' I gasped, in shock. It had been three years since the twilight saga finished, and they were still obsessed with 'Edward'!

''Yep, apart from the fans seem to be getting younger and younger these days.'' He admitted, making me laugh. I giggled, looking back down again, before going quiet again. I wasn't too sure what else I could say since I was sat next to my idol.

''So…I take it you're a fan because of twilight?'' Rob asked me curiously. I looked back up, and blushed as soon as I met his gaze, quickly looking away again.

''Well…not exactly. I've actually liked you since Harry Potter.'' I admitted, biting on my bottom lip.

''Oh really? Whenever I meet a fan, its because of twilight.'' He admitted, still sounding surprised.

''Well…I'm a loyal fan.'' I admitted, still blushing bright red. ''If not, sad.'' I added, huffing at myself, because it was probably true.

''Nah, loyal fans are the best.'' He disagreed with me. I looked back up at him, and smiled in response. I was happy to hear that from him.

''So how old are you? Twenty?'' He asked me, sounding curious. God knows why he was curious for. I was boring really.

''Not quite, but thanks.'' I replied, giggling again. ''Twenty two.'' I added, smiling as he took that in. He took another swig of his bottle of beer and I took a small sip of my bottle of WKD that I now had.

''Six years younger than you.'' I added, because I didn't know what else to say really. He nodded, smiling.

''So you were only…sixteen when twilight came around?'' he asked, checking to see if that was right.

I nodded. ''You're average fan girl.'' I laughed, just as Rachael walked over and put down two shot glasses. I shot her a confused look, because they were almost half full, and I didn't get why she had put them on _our_ table for.

She rolled her eyes in response. ''Kellan got you the shots. He agrees with me; you need a bit of alcohol courage to get you two talking properly.'' I blushed because of that, looking down at my hands, and getting all embarrassed.

Rachael sighed heavily in response. ''Just drink up. You'll start getting drunk again then.'' She warned me. I took my shot glass the same time that Rob did, but Rob had more courage than me, and threw the shot back.

I watched him carefully after he finished his shot, looking for any sign of discomfort on his face due to how strong the alcohol in that shot glass was bound to be, but I saw nothing. He smiled at Rachael.

''Tell Kellan I said thanks, please.'' He asked her politely. She laughed in response, winking at him, though I didn't miss that one.

''Will do.'' She promised, before she turned to look at me. ''Come on Charlie, drink up!!'' She told me, groaning in impatience.

I sighed heavily, before drinking the shot up. ''Oh my god…what did you put in there?'' I asked her in shock, finding the strong, repulsive flavour absolutely disgusting.

Rachael laughed in response. ''You know what the problem is?'' Rachael asked me. I looked up, waiting for her to continue. ''You're not drunk enough yet, that's why it tasted so strong for. Down some more shots, and you'll be fine.'' She promised me, making me huff in response. She laughed. ''I'll go get you some more shots to drink, darling.''

She walked away then, leaving me bright red and embarrassed because now I looked a right wimp, and right in front of sex god. Great, and just my fucking style too. Shouldn't have been surprised.

''I cant believe I was the only one who acted like a wimp.'' I complained under my breathe, not expecting him to hear, but he did.

''I'm drunk already, I wouldn't worry about it.'' Rob promised me, drinking his beer back again. I watched him, before quickly turning away again, realizing that I was staring. It was a constant habit with me.

''So…I really love your new film. It looks really…awesome.'' I admitted, sitting back on the sofa-styled chair, and watching him. He was just inches from me now, and I couldn't keep my eyes away.

''Thanks, have you read the book?'' He asked me curiously, holding my gaze with his own, intense one. I daren't look away now, because that amazing pull of energy was pulling me in, and closer to him again.

And I had to actually stop me from moving in, and do something that I regretted, like trying to kiss him, and making an idiot of myself…before I got kicked out of here. So I tried to stay calm…which was harder than I expected, what with his gaze holding mine still.

''Yeah…it has a really good storyline…sad, but…very interesting.'' I looked down to my hands, and bit on my lower lip shyly.

''Yeah, I agree. When I read the book, I really wanted to do the part.'' He admitted, as I nodded my head to tell him that I was listening. I looked up at him shyly, through my eyelashes, and held his intense gaze again, still deep on my face, and radiating the blush from my skin.

''Urm…yeah. I think you'll be amazing in it.'' I admitted, not realizing that I had shifted up a little bit more on the sofa, a little closer to him. In fact, not even he had noticed, which was a good thing.

My stomach was doing funny things, but I knew that it wasn't because of the alcohol I had been drinking. It was because we were now sat, very close to each other, and that irresistible force of chemistry was still pulling me in, towards him. And I was struggling to say no.

''Thanks, not a lot of people thought that.'' He admitted, trying to hold my gaze as I looked back down at my hands, and bit on my bottom lip in embarrassment again. Oh, if only Mum could see me now. I think she would actually die of shock!

I forced myself to look back up again, and hold his intense, almost smoldering gaze again. ''Well…I'm sure a lot of people will change their minds. I mean…the way they reacted after you got the Edward Cullen part, and then…everyone couldn't get enough.'' I said, biting on my lower lip as he smiled.

God, I was completely and utterly charmed. In fact, I could safely say that I was absolutely lost in his dazzling, beautiful ways.

''Uh hum,'' he agreed casually, his eyes finally leaving mine, and looking down, giving me time to gain my breathe as he slowly looked back up again. He smiled casually at me, causing me to blush again, opening his mouth to say something, just as Rachael walked back to over with more shots in her hand. Damn that bad timing!

''Here's your shots.'' Rachael grinned at us, putting three different types of shots in front of me and Rob. Rob tipped them back as she served them, and she grinned at him in response, as he thanked her.

''I think I may have found a new drinking partner.'' Rachael confirmed, giggling. I shot her a glare in response, making her roll her eyes. She knew why though; he was mine. Okay, so he wasn't, but…he was my fantasy, my sex god. Hands off.

''Charlie, I'm not leaving them until you drink them. You'll go through depressive mode if you don't get drunk.'' She said, making me roll my eyes in response. Was it in anyway possible for me to go through 'depressive mood' with my lover sat right here, with me? The answer was hell fucking no.

''Fine.'' I sighed as she stood, waiting for me impatiently. I tipped the clear-liquid shot back first, which was really strong and made me grimaced in response. I ignored Rachael laughing and downed the next one, which was green, and had a really nice, fruity taste to it. And then I downed the pink one, which tasted of really strong alcohol mixed with a bit of strawberries. It tasted nice, and didn't really burn my throat, but it made me feel a bit sick.

''Good Girl.'' Rachael commented, making me smile. ''Now just down this bottle of WKD, and you'll be drunk as hell.'' She gave me a new bottle of WKD for me to drink. I downed my last bottle, feeling very light headed, before moving onto the next bottle, and drinking half of it already.

I turned to see Rob watching me curiously, making me blush and look down at my hands, embarrassed.

''Sorry I er…didn't mean to stare.'' Rob apologized. I smiled and looked back up, still feeling my blush radiating on my cheeks as I looked back to him, to see him smiling at me still.

''It's okay, I don't mind.'' I admitted, and pushed myself forward before I knew what I was doing. I blushed in response, and quickly looked down at my hands, wondering what on earth I was doing.

I was practically making a move on him, we were sat that close now. And yet still…he was sat where he had been sat since we got here. It was that irresistible pull again, trying to reel me in, and keep me under the spell.

It was working, but it was certainly not a good idea, by any means. And yet, I was finding it harder and harder to resist this temptation, the need to be closer to him…

…I think the drink was getting to me, and doing very funny, strange things to my head. Or maybe I was just intoxicated by his very presence. A very overused sentence, but nevertheless true in this case.

He smiled slightly in response, and looked back down at his hands, like how I had been, and his forehead creased slightly as if he was thinking hard about something or other. I forced myself to look away, and told myself not to be so stupid before drinking back the remainder of my bottle of WKD…


	6. Chemistry

**It is said that silence is golden, but definitely not in this case. This silence was awkward, strange, and I hated it. We had been sat, not talking for roughly about five minutes now, and I struggled to think of something to say to him. He was still looking at his hands, his forehead creased as he concentrated on something or other. **

**What was there to possibly say to someone who had millions of fans, lots of people screaming for him, and crazy people who were always after him and drove him completely mad? Definitely not a lot. I was one of them millions of Girls who screamed at him, and I knew that he probably though I was sad. **

**He was six years older than me, and more experienced in every single way. I was still that silly, teenage girl who screamed over Rob Pattinson, and needed to grow up….badly. And now. At twenty two, I was so fucking immature, it was laughable, especially sat next to someone as glorious as Rob himself. **

**I built myself up to say something to him, anything, trying to think of something clever to say. Anything that wouldn't make me sound like a complete loser, like how I definitely looked now. Asking for his signature was definitely a sad move, but…if I asked him to dance…would he just move away, and call me sad? **

**Probably. I took a deep breathe, preparing to say something, anything casual to him, to make conversation whilst the slow, more mellow songs filled the VIP area now that the night was toning down. **

''**Urm…'' I looked up at Rob in shock, after he had began speaking. His forehead was still creased as he turned to look at me, his gaze holding mine, keeping me there. ''Do you want to dance?'' He finally asked me, keeping my gaze as he ran one of his hands through the top of his hair again. **

''**Well erm…I'm not sure.'' I admitted, watching as Rachael danced with Jackson on the dance floor. I smiled, because she looked so drunk, bless her. But at least she was having a good time though. **

**I looked back to see Rob nodding in response, and turned back round to look at the table, beer in hand. Shit, he thought I had just openly rejected him. Well done Charlie, good fucking thinking, not!!**

''**No, I-I…I'd like to dance.'' I admitted, even though I hated dancing. It wasn't anything to do with Rob, I just hated dancing. But for him, I would dance. **

**He looked round at me in shock, concentrating on my face, as if asking for permission. I nodded my head again once, to tell him that I wanted to dance with him. Despite how I hated dancing, it was going to be so worth it, just to dance with Rob. **

''**You sure?'' He asked me again. I nodded my head, moving closer to him slightly. ''You really don't have to, if you don't want to.'' He added, watching me closely. **

''**No…no, I really want to…if-if you do.'' I stuttered nervously. I looked down my hands, and blushed bright red, waiting for his answer. Of course it was bound to be something along the lines, of; **

'_**Like hell do I, you saddo!**_**'**

**But as I waited for his answer impatiently, I felt a strange feeling in the air. Something which I couldn't put my finger on. It was eagerness, probably radiating all from me, as my heart continued to beat erratically in my chest, like how it had all night long. **

**I looked up in surprise as Rob took my hand in his. **

**That sizzling chemistry between us burst instantly into a livewire, a powerful, delightful bound of electricity when our skin met, and my fingers were instantly lacing with his, pulling him up with me as that awesome amount of electricity and energy burst between us and causing a fire deep in the pit of my stomach as we walked slowly to the small dance floor in the VIP area. **

**It was need. Pure and simple need as that fire twisted and turned surprisingly comfortably as my arms stayed at the side, still laced with his hands as I watched him starting to dance easily from side to side. **

**His forehead creased as he ignored my gaze holding on him, and he removed his hands from mine, leaving mine stone cold and dropping to my sides awkwardly. He pressed his right hand into the side of my dress, just on my hip, and looking at me as if to make sure that it was okay. I smiled, giving him that permission. **

**His hand was like fire on my side, hot with electricity and pulling me deeper to him. My stomach ached with need, yearning to kiss him, but knowing how wrong it would be. He was just being friendly after all. **

**His left hand took my right one, making the sizzling chemistry turn into smoldering fire, and burning electricity as soon as his hand touched mine. My stomach lurched again; pure lust filling my every thought as I placed my other hand on his arm, before running it all the way to the top of his shoulder. **

**I let it stay there, dying to believe that he really wanted to dance with me, and that he wasn't just doing it for pity. The reason I thought that it was to do with pity was because he hadn't been talking to me for five minutes beforehand. **

**There was no way that he felt the same need that was raging through me right now, because that was just impossible. He hardly knew me, and this was someone who I had looked up to for years and years. **

**But we were dancing however, even if it was just a small, side-to-side, simple dance. It was perfect. Perfect because the Guy who I was dancing with, was the one who I had been madly obsessed with for all these years…admittedly. **

''**Wow…I'm dancing.'' I confirmed, snickering as I thought about it. I looked down at out feet, and blushed, sighing as I thought about the stupid reasons for me not going to my prom all them year ago. **

**This wasn't as hard as I imagined that it was, despite how tall Rob was compared to me. His hands were struggling keeping to my small body, because he was about five inches taller. But I didn't care; I would do anything for his hands to keep on me; to keep this sizzling electricity electrifying my whole body right now. **

''**Is that so hard to believe?'' He asked me confused, even though he was doing the most of the moving. I was just standing here, copying his easy, side-to-side sway, and trying to make myself believe that I was making it look as graceful as Rob was. **

**I dared myself to look back up, and find his intense gaze. He was staring down hard at me, looking as though he was trying to work something or other out in his head, and I decided to tell him why I was having a hard time believing that I was dancing. **

''**Urm…yeah. I'm not a very good dancer…at all. I never dance unless I'm completely wasted.'' I explained, making him laugh in response. **

''**Well you're halfway there.'' He reminded me jokingly. He was kinda right though; I was pretty drunk, by this point. **

''**True.'' I agreed with him. I laughed with him, before blushing and looking back down at my shoes again. ''But I missed my prom because I was too scared to dance…and because I looked like a total geek at my school.'' I admitted, laughing it off uneasily as I watched our feet continue to move with the slow, mellow beat. **

''**But I hated dancing so much that I stay away from it was much as possible.'' I admitted, before forcing myself to look back up, and meet the same intense gaze radiating from him. He smiled in response. **

''**I was always like that; hating dancing, or anything social…but I've supposed I've grown up a little more now…got used to a bit.'' He admitted, shrugging a little. I nodded, noticing how he had grown up already. **

**He was still as shy, but there was still something about him. He had a newfound confidence, and I found it a little new and unsafe if I was honest. I liked him best when he was shy, because he reminded me so badly like myself. **

**Now, I presumed that he thought that I was just a silly little Girl, who was too quiet, too shy, and needed to grow up and get over him…badly. As usual, I thought the worst, and took things way out of proportion. **

**It was something that I had a talent at. **

''**You're very quiet.'' I looked back up to see Rob watching me closely, trying to work me out again. I blushed in response and forced myself to look back down at the floor again. I bit down hard on my lower lip. **

''**Are you always quiet?'' Rob asked me curiously. Oh hell no, if only he bloody knew me; I'd soon be driving him mad! I talked way too much after I got to know someone more, and I knew that I annoyed everyone. **

''**Urm…'' I trailed off, thinking of the best way to describe how I was both shy and loud at the same time. ''Well…I get really quiet when I meet someone new, and I go all embarrassed. And then, when I get to know someone…I kinda just get more confidence to speak out more.'' I admitted, because it was true. **

**He nodded, looking at me as though he was intrigued by my confession. I blushed red again in response, and looked away quickly, to the floor, where I watched our feet moving again, to the beat. **

**That same inevitable pull was daring me to take things further again, to make a bigger idiot of myself than I already had. I wasn't giving into the hold that this chemistry had on me, no matter how tempting. **

''**So if I got to know you a little better…you'd be louder, would you?'' Rob asked me intrigued. I blushed a heavy red, trying not to smile as I nodded my head. I looked up in shock, and saw him smiling back at me. **

**Did that mean that…well that he wanted to get to know me better? No surely not; there was no way that he would want to know me any better. I was so boring, I could send a party animal to sleep. **

''**Well er…I'd like that…to get to know you more, I mean.'' He admitted, causing my heart to speed back up again, and me to feel sort of…faint in his arms. His forehead furrowed as I leaned into his hand, which was now on my back, sending waves of deep warmth through my whole body. **

''**Whoa, are you alright there?'' Rob asked me confused as my body went weak from above his hand. I smiled up at him shyly in response, blushing a bright red as I pulled myself back up, and tried not to look even more stupid than I already clearly did. **

''**Yep. Just in shock.'' I admitted, hiding my beetroot face from him so he couldn't see. He chuckled under his breathe; the sound throaty and manly. I blushed even harder as I started to get weird looks from the staff working in the VIP area, and I hid my face again. **

''**So…I don't understand. Why were you in shock exactly?'' Rob asked me confused. God, what could I tell him? I didn't want to tell him that I was in shock about him liking me, because he might not even like me.**

**He might have just simply have been taking pity on a loyal fan, and dancing with her, letting her hopes get up, only to be dashed later, after he saw how pathetic I was, and how annoyingly loud I was.**

''**Just erm…in shock about er…meeting my favourite hero.'' I replied, before ducking my head and blushing bright red, because that sounded worse than anything else I could have said right now. **

**He chuckled again, in the same husky tone; rough but musical at the very same time. My heart fluttered awake in my chest in response. I looked back up and met his intense gaze, with my unsure one. **

**His eyes raked my face, taking in every feature until he stopped, and his eyes lingered on my lips. I bit my lower lip in response, wondering if what I was thinking was a good idea. I mean…he was definitely staring at my lips; there was no denying it. **

**I was moving forward before I knew what I was doing myself though I had a pretty good feeling that it was the alcohol doing the actions now. He watched me in shock, unsure about what I was doing. **

**I moved closer still, until there was no space between us. The spark between us was flaming up, and I could feel the chemistry that I felt towards him hit right dead centre in the pit of my stomach, sending waves of need and lust throughout the whole of my body. **

**I turned my head to the side slightly, and leaned my face in slowly, watching his face the whole time for any sign about him pulling away. I saw none, so I leaned in closer; my lips so close to his now…**

''**Anyone want free drinks?'' A young, small voice asked. I turned to the side to look at the interruption, feeling pretty pissed about it actually. She was female, and very, very young looking too. **

**She had strawberry blonde hair, and she was very pretty. She had bright red lipstick on, with her face heavily done in make-up, like a film star, with her eyelashes long in black mascara, and her black eyeliner was evident as she gave a false, pouting smile at Rob. I huffed in response, knowing the look she gave him was not at all innocent. **

**I had seen people do that on television when they wanted someone all to themselves, and make a move on them. And the worst thing was, she was a waitress too! She obviously worked here in the VIP area too. **

**She was wearing a very short black dress, with a white pinny-style bib round the front, with nothing to cover her legs, besides the small, black heels on her feet. Her blonde hair was straight, but she was so pretty. **

**I looked away quickly, feeling like such an idiot. Rob may have not had the chance to kiss me even if he wanted to, but he hadn't exactly moved anywhere near closer to me. He had his chance to meet me halfway, but he didn't. **

**And he had looked shocked that I was even going to move in to kiss him. In fact no, cancel that, he had looked almost **_**mortified **_**about me going to kiss him. And could who blame him when he women like that chasing him? **

**Rob turned slightly, but not nearly enough to look at her, and mumbled a small; ''No thank you…I'll er…be right back.'' He said to me, not meeting my eyes now, before he stormed off quickly back through the VIP doors. **

**But I knew that he wasn't coming back. He had grabbed his jacket on the way out, telling me that he was presumably leaving me and this club, and going home, whilst he could still escape me. I couldn't blame him, but I so badly wanted to run and stop him. **

**But there was no point. He was running **_**from**_** me obviously. So I just stood, watching him leave, and ignoring the waitress who huffed at me in response to my sadness and the fact that I had just been very clearly stood up by my very own sex god, and rightly so. **

**Rachael walked over to me then, and pushed me lightly, waking up from my staring. ''Well…go after him then.'' She warned me angrily. I sighed heavily in response, watching the waitress put down her tray on the bar, and run out the door to chase after him. **

**She was so beautiful, and she had been staring at him a few times. There was no competition over who he was going to choose over me or her. **

''**If you think she has a chance then you are so fucking wrong. Look at the state of her Charlie!'' Rachael warned me, as the waitress ran down the stairs in her eagerness to catch Rob before he left. **

''**Yeah well she's pretty compared to me!'' I shouted back, because I honestly believed that it was true. And I felt like such an idiot for ruining things with him, when things were just going **_**okay**_**, and because of that, and the drink too; I rushed to the bathroom in the VIP section, with tears already brimming down my cheeks. **

''**Charlie.'' Rachael sighed from behind me in response. I heard her following behind me, but I hoped that she wouldn't come into the bathroom, because it was embarrassing as it was, with me crying my eyes out over something so stupid. **

**I slammed the bathroom door behind me, and locked the bathroom cubicle behind me, trying so hard not to cry as a few tears slipped down my cheeks. **

''**Charlie.'' I heard Rachael call, stepping into the bathroom. ''Charlie, open this door now!'' Rachael demanded, banging on the cubicle door. ''Otherwise, I promise you Darling, it will be getting kicked down!'' She added, making me laugh then despite how pissed off I was with myself. **

**I forced myself to open the door, and smile at her as I dried my tears up, and made sure that I had no black lines underneath my eyes. Rachael smiled at me as I sorted myself out in the mirror, and she brushed my hair for me, before turning me round, and reapplying some shimmering, red lip-gloss for me. **

**She smiled proudly after doing my make-up so nicely for me. ''You look absolutely beautiful.'' She promised me, taking my hand and squeezing it gently. ''Now, go out there and get him, before that slapper can get her hands on him. This is your dream come true Charlie, so enjoy it.'' She told me, making me laugh in response. **

**I felt so stupid now, crying over something so stupid. ''Okay, even though I think it it's a bit pointless.'' I admitted, huffing. It was true though; how could I have made such an idiot of myself like that?**

**I didn't care that I had alcohol to blame me, that wasn't the point. ''No, it's not…just go and talk to him.'' She asked me. I nodded, and refused to try and let her pull my dress up and under, so that it looked shorter. I walked downstairs in my black high heels, and looked about for any sign of Rob. **

**There was absolutely no sign of hi all around the club, so I went outside, knowing that Rob had probably gone home already, and that it was probably a waste of time, but not caring one bit. I glanced around the smoking area on the left side of the club, where I found him. **

**I was about to walk up to him, when I listened to what he was saying to the same blonde waitress from upstairs. ''I don't know why you're even here for, Katie! We're over, we've been over for a year!'' I gasped in shock, and hid myself behind a wall, before they could hear me, and listened carefully. **

''**Oh come on baby, you know that we had a good time when we were together.'' She replied with a heavy American accent. ''And it was very intense, from what I can recall.'' She added, making me cringe in jealousy. **

''**Oh please Katie, we were together for two months, and we never spent anytime together.'' Rob huffed back in response.**

''**Because I was away modelling. But things will be different this time, I promise baby.'' She replied sweetly. So she was a model, and it was no surprise with how beautiful she actually looked. **

''**I don't want things to be different Katie. It's over, and I've moved on.'' He told her, making her huff in response. **

''**What, moved on to that ugly British Girl, I saw you talking to there? She looked like a total retard. And I mean god, surely you could have gotten someone at least half fitter than that her in there-''**

''**-Don't talk about my friends like that, Katie!'' He shouted at her furiously. ''Just leave me alone, I said its over, didn't I?'' He shouted at her. I heard Rob's feet walking closer but before I had time to walk away, he was right in front of me, catching me red handed. **

**I looked down at the floor embarrassed, and started to speak. ''Sorry, I er…came to look for you.'' I admitted because it was true. I tried not to let the Girl's words bother me, even though they stung like hell. Because she was right; I was a mess, and I wasn't worth it, and I wasn't even sure why Rob bothered to call me 'his friend' for. **

**Still, it made my heart beat erratically in my chest in response, and I couldn't deny the happiness that I felt because of it. I was so happy, that at this moment, I could have quite happily jumped the walls. **

''**Doesn't matter; are you coming back in the club with me?'' He asked me. I nodded, looking up slightly to see his outstretched hand. I took it automatically, that sizzling chemistry scolding into hot fire as soon as our skin touched, and followed him back into the club. **

*******


	7. Shots

**Closer**

We walked up to the VIP area upstairs, hand in hand, and as soon as we were in the VIP section, Rachael raised her eyebrows in response to me and Rob holding hands. I blushed bright red in response.

''I know!'' I mumbled under my breathe in response, making her laugh in response. I followed Rob over to where we had sat before we had got up to dance, and I couldn't help but smile in response as Rob kept his hand in mine.

''Do you want another drink?'' Rob asked me, releasing my hand from his then. I nodded, trying not to notice how his hand had dropped from mine, though it was hard. The smoldering fine between our skin returned to the small, yearning feeling in the pit of my stomach.

'Urm…yes please.'' I asked, wanting another bottle of WKD. ''Can I have another bottle of blue WKD please?'' I asked him, watching him get up from the sofa. He nodded, flashing me an irresistible smile as he got over to the bar.

I watched him as he got me a bottle of WKD, and brought himself a bottle of beer. He walked back over to the table slowly, and yet again; I couldn't keep my eyes away from him. He was the most beautiful person that I had ever had the pleasure to look at, and I was still completely intoxicated by just him being here.

''I don't know if…well if you heard anything outside.'' Rob started, running his hand through the top of his hair embarrassedly.

''I'd just got outside when I saw you.'' I lied, looking at the floor quickly, and biting on my lower lip. I totally sucked at lying, and so with not keeping eye contact, at least I could have half-successfully lied.

The good thing was that he seemed to believe me. ''Oh…'' he trailed off, and I waited to see if he said something more. But before he could, I looked up, after hearing Rachael laughing, very loudly.

She grinned at me as Jackson followed her over to our table, and I noticed that she had yet more drinks. Ugh, lovely. Was she trying to give me a hangover tomorrow morning or what? It wasn't nice to think that I already felt partly sick as it was.

''Don't roll your eyes at me Charlie, you're drinking these shots. I paid three dollars for these! Because apparently its past twelve, and you have to pay for shots when its past twelve.'' She complained, mimicking the waitress at the bar with a terrible American accent, after I had rolled her eyes at her in response to her shots in hand.

And three dollars wasn't that bad as she did have three different shots in her hand, and three dollars was one pound fifty in English money.

Jackson handed Rob the same amount of shots. ''I've never seen anybody drink so much. Or share so many shots.'' Jackson said in awe, as Rachael ran back over to the bar, to grab her and Jackson's own shots.

She tipped hers back all in one go, despite the fact that she had five shots too, and smiled at him. ''I'm a sharing person, darling.'' She told him, making him laugh. He winked at her in response, making her giggle.

And me smile. Jackson seemed to really liked Rachael, and they seemed to be getting on really well. They had been sat together all night, which was nice, because I half expected Rachael to jump him as soon as she first saw Jackson.

But she didn't, she was good. She sat with him, and he started buying her drinks even which was sweet, even if it was all free. But still, I thought it was really nice, and they seemed to be getting on great.

She sat down at the table then, and grinned at me drunkenly with Jackson taking the seat next to her. I giggled in response, noticing how drunk she was, but she hadn't missed the fact that I hadnt tipped my shots back…neither had Rob.

''Well come on Guys, drink your shots!'' She ordered, huffing at us.

''Okay, okay.'' I agreed, laughing along with Rob after I saw him roll his eyes in response to Rachael.

We both did each shots at a time, with me taking in each vile and strong flavour. They were all badly strong, and disgusting, but I'd only get told off if I didn't drink them.

Rob turned at the same I did, and grinned at me, and I giggling, blushing in response, and quickly looking away. My heart was fluttering like mad in my chest, beating erratically in response to a simple smile.

''More drink!'' Rachael shouted as she got up from the table, making me jump. I laughed in response, watching her get up, and knowing that she would be getting us drunk right up until the end of the night…

***


	8. Chat

When I woke up that morning, I couldn't remember anything very much, apart from just after we had gone back into the club, and Rachael had got the shots in, but luckily I didn't have a hangover, which was the main thing.

I got up and got a shower, still struggling to remember what happened from the night before, but really struggling to remember hardly anything after we had them shots in the club, and I was still trying to remember as I got myself dressed in my bedroom.

I put on a blue, strappy dress, with red, pretty flowers on it, and some flip-flops, and walked downstairs. I yawned, trying not to ruin my make-up, and walked into the living room, where I froze at the doorway.

Sat on the sofa, watching television; was Rob himself. Did he actually stay over last night then? By the looks of it, he had, because he still had on the same clothes from the night before. It was just him, and I was wondering if I should go into the kitchen for a moment, whilst I could compose myself properly.

But he had turned and saw me already, so I smiled at him, a little unsure. He smiled back, which instantly made my fluttering heartbeat start beating more radically in my chest, in response to just a simple smile from sex god himself.

His hair was in a glorious, dishevelled mess, and it looked absolutely everywhere as he ran his hand through the top of his hair again, and gently pulling on a few strands there at the top of his hair.

''Ur…hello again.'' I said, not sure what else to say, but instantly regretting how stupid I sounded. I walked into the living room, looking at how clean the living room now. I could imagine that it was a mess when we got home last night though, even if I couldn't remember it.

''Hello again,'' Rob replied, grinning at me. I smiled back, feeling a blush creep its way up my cheeks. I was sure that my poor heart wasn't able to take much more of this; it was still overreacting like mad in response to a simple grin.

''You look surprised to see that I'm here.'' He commented, running his hand through the top of his hair, as he sipped his glass of water.

''That's because I am…I don't really remember much last night after Rachael got them shots in again.'' I admitted, blushing as I struggled to remember what happened, because I was praying that I hadn't done something stupid.

He laughed easily in response, and the pure sound of it was still enough to make me feel…absolutely thrilled that this was actually happening. My poor heart was still struggling to accept the pure beauty of him.

''Not a lot happened after that anyway. We got a taxi soon after that and Rachael wanted us to stay here, in the living room, overnight.'' He admitted, as he continued to watch the television and drink his glass of water.

''Oh…well that's okay then.'' I replied, taking a seat on the other sofa, next to the sofa that he was sat on. I wasn't too sure if I should sit next to Rob, or even if my poor heart could take any more dazzling, so I kept safely away.

''Have you got a hangover?'' I asked him curiously, because he was drinking water. Not that you would actually be drinking water-the drink you should be drinking with a hangover apparently is tomato juice-with a hangover but I was just making conversation.

''Not really; just a little sick after all them shots last night.'' He admitted, shuddering at the very thought of it. I grinned in response, and quickly looked back at the television, blushing, as I replied to that.

''Well, tomato juice is supposed to be a good cure for sickness and hangovers, you know.'' I suggested innocently. Because friends could do that right? If that was even what I was. That's what he had said last night anyway.

But then again, maybe he was just saying it to be nice. I didn't know, did I?

''I hate tomato juice.'' He replied sourly.

''Me too.'' I replied, because it was true. ''When I was in America on holiday when I was sixteen, I had tomato juice, expecting to like it, because it was a vegetable, and I liked lots of vegetables and fruit. But I couldn't stand it.'' I admitted, grimacing as I thought about it, because that was also true.

I couldn't stand tomato juice, and as soon as I had had a sip of it, I had to leave it, because it had tasted awful. Just like what it was called; mashed tomato in a cup, where-as I expected it to be lovely, like orange juice or something.

''So have you been to American before then?'' He asked me curiously as we continued to watch the television, which was now busy talking about the daily news now.

''Yeah, three times, I think.'' I admitted, trying to work out if that was right or not in my head. ''I went to Florida first, to Disney land when I was about five, and then I went to Washington D.C., San Francisco, and Las Vegas when I was sixteen. And then we went back to Las Vegas when I was seventeen.'' I admitted, trying to make conversation with him.

I doubt that he'd be very interested anyway; I mean this was Rob Pattinson, in our living room, and he had probably gone almost all over the world if not for holiday, then for tours with the twilight cast, and other projects.

''Did you like Las Vegas?'' He asked me curiously.

''Umm…I didn't mind it, but it wasn't as nice as I thought it was going to be. But I was underage when I went…so no gambling, no drinking either.'' I added, making him laugh in response. I blushed, and carried on.

''So, I might like it better if I went again now, but I much preferred the history of things. I much preferred Washington D.C.'' I admitted because it was true.

''That's strange you should say that. Most young people would say Las Vegas, because of the shows, and nightlife.''

''Well I guess I'm a bit different. I much prefer finding out the interesting stuff about town first, like the history of a place.'' I admitted, because it was all true. I hadn't really thought much of Las Vegas as a favourite of mine.

''I'd probably say the same, if I'm honest.'' He admitted, and it was virtually impossible to ignore the way my heart sped up in response to the similarities between us. ''So how are you liking Los Angeles so far?'' Rob asked me curiously.

''I love it here. We were supposed to come on holiday to check it out first, but we didn't get the chance. But I really like it here.''

''Was there a specific reason why you decided to move here from England, or did you just want a change?'' Rob asked me curiously.

''Urm, well…'' I trailed off, thinking of the best answer to give to that one. The only reason why the twilight buds have moved out here in the first place was to meet this sex god sat right here, but I couldn't tell him that.

''Okay, to be honest…we heard that you lived in the area. And…well we wanted to move out here near-by to you guys, but it was also because we were just so fed up of England. Everything's…changed compared to how it used to be.'' I admitted in the best way that I could, at least I wasn't telling him how much I had wanted to find him, which was true.

Rachael walked into the living room then and grinned at us in response to see that we were talking. ''Charlie, your work's just rang, and you don't have to go in as there's a leak in your office, and everything's ruined in the room.'' She told me.

''Ha, I bet Olivia's furious about that!'' I laughed as I imagined how angry Olivia would be when she couldn't send her new story off to the editor to look at. The only bit of good news about it for her was that she got a day off from everyone working at that office.

''That's alright then, I have the day off.'' I said thrilled, making Rachael frown at me in response, making me confused.

''Lucky bitch, even Tasha and Kirsty cant go in. That's it, I'm having a fucking day off now!'' She raged, storming out of the living room. I looked to see Rob, watching her leave shocked, and I burst out laughing.

He laughed with me, and I shook my head in response to Rachael. ''God, she's such a joker.'' I commented.

''She is that.'' Rob agreed with me. ''Where do you work then?'' He asked me curiously, after we had stopped laughing.

''Urm…at an office building. I have my own office with this other Girl.'' I admitted, not telling him _exactly_ what I had to do there, because I didn't yet want to tell him that I write stories. Not yet.

''Oh cool, are you enjoying it, or?'' He asked me.

''Yeah, its really nice. A bit hard to take in at the minute, because I've only worked there a day, but I'm liking it.'' I admitted.

''Well that's the main thing.'' He agreed with me.

''Yeah,'' I agreed, getting up from the sofa. ''Do you want anything to drink or to eat or anything? I'm going to make some breakfast for myself.'' I told him, as I walked towards the living room door.

''No thanks, better not. Still don't feel too good.'' He admitted, grimacing. I smiled at him in response.

''Are you sure that I cant tempt you into having a tomato juice?'' I joked, watching him grimace again in response. I laughed.

''No thanks. Definitely not tomato juice.'' He added. I laughed, and walked out of the living room. ''Oh, Charlie?''

''Yeah?'' I asked, walking back into the living room as soon as he had said my name. that was the first time that he had actually talked about me by my name. His forehead creased a little, and he ran his hand through the top of his hair, as if he was embarrassed about what he was going to say next.

''Can I er…come with you? Do you mind?'' He asked me.

''Ur…hell yeah, you can come with me.'' I replied, before giggling, and blushing in response. He grinned, sending my heart soaring again. He got up from the sofa too and followed me out to the kitchen, watching me as I put the toast in the toaster.

I put some jam on the toast, and poured myself an orange juice, and sat down at the kitchen table, with Rob sitting opposite. He got his mobile out whilst I started eating-very slowly as I was sat facing sex god-and sighed heavily.

''Sorry, I have to go.'' He apologized as he got up from the table. I finished easting my toast, and got up too after I had finished.

''Urm…okay. Well will I see you later?'' I asked him unsure, begging silently that he would say yes.

He smile, sending my heart wild again. ''You will. The Girls are organizing a party round here.'' He told me.

''Oh,'' I replied in surprise. Happy surprise though. ''Well I'll see you later then.'' I agreed happily.

''You will.'' He agreed just as happily. His forehead creased, and he ran his hand through the top of his hair, as he prepared himself to ask something or other. ''Urm…can I have your number, so I can talk to you a bit later?''

''Sure.'' I agreed automatically, giving him my mobile number. ''I'll talk to you later then.'' I agreed, watching him leave.

''You will.'' He promised again, leaving our house. I watched him go sadly, missing him already. I hadn't wanted him to go yet, and now I had the whole of the day to miss him.

''He'll be back soon darling.'' Rachael promised me. I smiled at her, walking back into the living room and watching some more television.

***


	9. Making Up Again

I waited impatiently in the living room for Rob to come back to the house, and I couldn't help but think that maybe he wouldn't come back. He had only been gone a few hours, but he might get a better offer whilst he was out.

Like that Katie, for example.

However as I went upstairs and got ready for tonight, washing my hair again, and putting my make-up on after, I got a text.

I picked up my phone from the table after it buzzed, thinking that it would probably be just from one of my family as they hadn't talked to me since I got here, which was unusual, but I opened a text by a number I didn't recognize and got a shock.

**Hi Charlie, it's Rob. **

**Just thought I'd text you to let you know that I've just got in a taxi, and I'll be round in twenty minutes. With some WKD. **

**See you soon. Rob. **

I screamed in response, literally screamed. I couldn't help it; it still felt like a dream come true to be actually speaking to my lover of a sex god. He meant everything to me, even more-so now that I had met him.

Rachael rushed into my room after hearing my scream, and stared at me in confusion. She was dressed like me, but she had obviously ran in here in utter shock to find out why I had screamed for.

''Sorry,'' I apologized , laughing. ''Rob text me.'' I added, grinning at her happily. I was so happy to think that he had actually text me, even though I really hadn't expected him to if I was being honest.

''Let's see the text then.'' Rachael grinned back. I showed her the text message with pride, and she laughed as she read it. ''Well, its good to know that he's bringing alcohol. That's what I like to hear.'' She added, making me roll my eyes in response.

I had put on a black, patterned dress with small, delicate, flower patterns all over the pretty dress. I put on some black, high heels too, and walked downstairs to see that Rob had just walked into the house.

He was checking his mobile again, with his head down giving me a moment to take in how beautiful he looked. He was wearing a light, cream shirt, and dark, blue jeans, with black shoes, and I couldn't help but notice how his shirt buttons had a few undone…

I cleared my throat as I walked downstairs, keeping my head down, and blushing like mad when I saw that his head instantly looked up and to me. I got to the bottom of the stairs, and forced myself to look back up, at him.

He smiled, making my heart overreact like mad again. ''You look…nice.'' He commented before quickly walking away again.

''Thanks, so do you.'' I said back, because it was true. I mean, he looked a lot more than nice; he looked beautiful, stunning, amazing, but I wasn't going to tell him that just yet, just in-case I scared him away or anything.

''So, are you ready to party?'' he asked me jokingly, chuckling under his breathe and holding up the four bottle of blue WKD.

''Am now.'' I replied, following him out into the garden, where everyone already was getting drunk.

I sat down next to Rob on the outside sofa, and on the same sofa, this time. I tried to ignore it when Rob rested his arm on the back of the sofa, behind us, but it was hard. Just the mere closeness of him, sat next to me, was making my heart overreact, and the sizzling chemistry between us flame up even more.

''So…did you think that you'd actually meet me when you moved to LA?'' Rob asked me as he drank his bottle of beer. I shook my head because the genuine truth was that I didn't think that I would get to meet him. Ever.

''No, I really didn't. So, if I act a little surprised when we talk, don't think that you're seeing things. I really am still in shock.'' I admitted, making him laugh.

''Well I'm really glad that I met you. There's not a lot of times that the fans genially make me laugh, like how you do.'' He admitted, grinning. I smiled back, not caring that he had basically called me a joke, and ignoring my fluttering heart.

His phone started ringing then, and he pulled it out of his jean pocket and held it to his ear. ''Hello?'' he said, sounding frustrated for some reason. I looked away, and drank my WKD quietly, trying not to listen.

''Look, I thought that I told you already before.'' He put his phone on his shoulder and turned to smile at me apologetically. ''Sorry, I have to take this.'' he apologized.

I smiled. ''It's okay. Go ahead.'' I promised him. He smiled and got up from the outdoor sofa, and sighed heavily.

''I told you before that I didn't want you calling me.'' Rob warned the person on the phone furiously, as he walked off and stood at the end of our big garden, where he continued talking on the phone.

Rachael walked up to me, having seen all of this. ''Who's that on the phone?'' Rachael asked me confused.

''I don't know. Private call.'' I told her, as I didn't know who it was. She nodded, still watching Rob confused.

''Well he looks pretty pissed off about it.'' She noted, because he really did look unhappy and angry. Which I thought was pretty unusual for him.

''I know. I wonder who he's talking to.'' I agreed with her. She pursed her lips for a long while, before shrugging in response.

''I don't know, darling. But you want to ask him, because if he's talking to a secret Girl or whatever, be sure to kick him where it hurts.'' She warned me making me roll my eyes in response.

''Yeah alright Rach, I'll try and remember that.'' I replied sarcastically, even though she took it as me being serious.

''Good girl.'' She replied, winking at me, before walking back over to Jackson, and sitting on his lap. I sighed heavily in response, and shook my head, waiting for Rob to come back from having that phone call.

He came over five minutes later and smiled apologetically at me. ''Sorry about that. I'm just going outside to make another call, I'll be back in a minute.'' He promised me, walking back into the house to go outside and make yet another phone call.

I sighed heavily, wishing that he would just sit down next to me and make the call, because I wouldn't listen if he didn't want me to, and the truth was, I wanted him to sit next to me. And stay next to me.

That sickly, yearning feeling was turning in the pit of my stomach, and I hated how much I wanted him to come back and sit next to me. Just to be touching me in any single way possible, even if it was just sat down next to me.

''Go and get him, Charlie.'' Rachael warned me after a minute or two, noticing how down I was about it. I shook my head though, because he was making another call, and I didn't him to think that I was being nosy, when I wasn't; I just wanted to be with him.

Rachael frowned, but left it for a while as I drank back the rest of my bottle of WKD which Rob had given me.

It was a few minutes after that though when Rachael growled suddenly and got back off of Jackson's lap, and walked up to me. ''You came here to meet your sex god Charlie, and I'm going to make you spend as much time with him as you possibly can.''

I tried to stop her, but she had already pulled me up and was dragging me through the house, and to the front door. ''Rach no, he said that he was going to make a phone call. He was busy, leave it be-''

''-I just want us to be back together, babes. We had something special, and I know that that British Girl is just your friend.'' My jaw literally dropped when I saw that this Katie was back again. I watched as she rested her hands against the side of her face, the jealousy hitting me like a slap to the face.

He didn't move though, and in fact he practically initiated it, as he moved in a little more, closer to her. It was just a good thing that I couldn't see his face, and that he had his back to me, so that he couldn't see how hurt I knew that I looked.

And it was so fucking stupid. I had no right to be hurt, because we were just mates, having a laugh. But I couldn't deny the painful twinge of hate and jealousy, mixed with rage that was raging through my body.

''I see Rob's busy, Charlie. We'll just have to come back.'' Rachael shouted loudly, just before they kissed, and this got their attention. Katie looked round in shock, before huffing as she saw us, and Rob also looked round in shock.

''Thanks a lot Rachael.'' I muttered sourly, before pushing her out of the way, and back into the house. She tried to stop me, as I reached the stairs, but I wouldn't have it, even though I knew she had just been trying to do me a favour.

''I'm fucking fine Rachael! Just leave me alone!'' I shouted at her, storming up the stairs, and feeling tears slipping from my eyes already.

''Charlie,'' I heard Rob call now, but I ignored him too, as I stormed into my bedroom, and slammed the door behind me, locking the door. And ignoring Rachael trying to get me out of my room all night. It was then that I really cried however, despite how stupid it was. I couldn't help it; these feelings that I was feeling were making me feel so confused, and all I knew was that my heart literally felt like it ached.

***

Rachael found the key to my bedroom. And after everyone had left, she walked into my bedroom, as I sat in my nightclothes, watching the television quietly, with my teddy bear in hand, and my make-up ruined.

Great; I probably looked like a fucking panda too. There was no need to question why Rob would pick someone like that compared to me. There was a huge difference in comparison from me to her.

''Everyone's gone home…Rob included.'' She promised me. I could only huff in response, the aching in my body getting worse as soon as she mentioned Rob's name.

''Good.'' I mumbled, rolling over and facing away from her. I felt so stupid, lying here and crying, but…that was what I did best, when I was upset and frustrated about things. And right now, I missed home like hell for once.

''Charlie, Rob said that he sent you a text.'' Rachael warned me. I heard her walk over to me, but I didn't look. She sat down next to me, on the bed, and gently moved strands of hair out of the way of my face.

''W-Why should I-I even fuck-fucking care?'' I demanded, because I was angry. Rachael knew that I didn't mean what I said when I was mad, and I got proof of that when I sat up properly, and watched her.

''Because you love him.'' She spelled it out for me, making me snicker in response. Of course, in some way I probably did love him, and not even in the way that a fan loved their hero, but that just made it even worse, even more weird.

''Huh. Which makes me look even weirder.'' I didn't totally disagree with her. She laughed in response, rolling her eyes at me.

''Not weird, Charlie. Just part of who you are. We're used to you going on about Rob all the time, and you cant just let some tart put this dream down!'' She warned me, which was true really. Well that, and the fact that I probably needed to grow up and get a life. But this was me.

I frowned then, giving in. ''Let's see the text.'' I asked her, holding my phone out for my mobile which I knew that I had left downstairs.

She grinned triumphantly, and handed me my mobile. I took it from her, and got open my messages, where I had a new one from Rob. I opened it up and forced myself to read it in my head.

**I'm sorry about tonight. **

**Just read this text quickly, before you go to sleep, please. **

**If I upset you in any way then I'm sorry. If you prank call me then I will you back and explain about tonight. **

**Please do that, because I really need to talk to you. **

I sighed, and called his mobile. I let it ring for a while, before cutting it off, because he wasn't answering anyway. Rachael smiled at me as I cuddled up to my teddy bear Esme.

''If it helps to hear then…Rob went home straight away after you ran up the stairs, and he looked really upset about it. And he definitely went home on his own.'' She promised me. I nodded, and let her leave to go to bed then, sat there thinking about tonight.

I was just about to turn my phone off when Rob's number popped onto the screen, ringing me. I sighed, and answered the phone.

''Whatever you do Charlie, please don't hang up. Just hear me out.'' He begged me, before I even got a chance to say anything. Okay, so here goes…

''Okay.'' I forced myself to agree, wanting to hear him out. I mean, he shouldn't even have felt the need to tell me anything or explain himself to me, because we were just mates. If we were even that.

He didn't have to tell me anything and yet, he wanted to. He wanted to tell me about this, and for that; I felt happier about it. I felt ecstatic in fact, because he trusted me to tell me something that was private.

''Right, for starters me and Katie are _never_ getting back together again.'' He empathised the word never. ''The reason that I find it…hard sometimes to be around you, is because you're a fan. Katie was a fan too.''

I sat up then, instantly wanting him to carry on, and continue telling me what he meant. I may have been so nosy, but my curiousness got the best of me. And I was now definitely listening very carefully.

''Me and Katie went out for a couple of months; nothing serious and nothing came out of it, but I called it off, because we didn't get to see each other at all, so it was pointless.'' He carried on, rushing with his story in his eagerness to explain to me.

My heart jumped with delighted glory, just so happy that he had actually decided to tell _me_. ''But whenever I see her about, she…well, you saw tonight. But I don't want her back, and I needed to tell you this.''

But now that he had admitted this…I was confused. I didn't get why he thought he needed to tell me this, when we weren't even really friends. It was safe to say that I was quite confused about his choice to tell me.

''But…why have you told me this for?'' I asked him confused.

''Because we were getting on so well, or at least starting to. And er…well, I just…'' he sighed heavily, and tried to say it again.

''I like you Charlie.'' He admitted, making my breathe catch, and my heart beat erratically inside my chest in response. ''I _really_ like you, and I'd like to be friends with you. If you just…give me the chance.'' He begged.

''I'd like that.'' I promised him, because it was true.

''You would?'' Rob asked me, sounding as though he was unsure. God knows why he sounded so unsure for though; I thought it was obvious about how much I wanted to be friends with him. He already meant a lot to me, and I had only known him for a couple of days. I was very much in deep.

''Yeah, I'd love to be your friend.'' I admitted, because it was true. It would mean absolutely everything to me; the world to me, in fact.

He laughed, the sound of it relieved. ''I'm so glad you said that.'' He admitted, making me blush, and smile in response.

***


	10. College Guy

I spent most of the night talking to Rob on the phone, about anything really. We were just talking about casual things, like favourite music, and stuff. I had admitted to him how much I liked his music, but he wasn't embarrassed by that, thank god.

When I got up in the morning, I told Rachael all about it, and she was obsessed by the thought that Rob had the hots for me. Which of course, was definitely not true. He didn't have the hots for me at all; we were just mates.

And I could safely say-despite the fact that I couldn't really deny that I fancied him a little bit, because I had for years-that I was happy about us being friends. It was so much more better than anything I could have asked for.

I had put on a black and blue striped dress, which was quite pretty, but was a little short, but Rachael had promised me that it looked fine on me. We went out shopping then with everyone, with Rachael commenting about why Tasha wanted to go shopping for.

Because Rachael had got it into her head that Tasha already wanted to dress up for Adam, even though they had been only dating for a matter of a few days. It was something that Rachael would do for Jackson, but god!

''I wonder why you want to go shopping for Tasha.'' Rachael smirked at her. I laughed along with Rachael, because I knew what Rachael meant by that. She meant that Tasha would be dressing up for her new Boyfriend.

God, they had only been going out with each other for a few days! But that was just Rachael, and how she was, bless her. Tasha rolled her eyes in response, understanding what Rachael meant by that.

''Rachael! Honestly I've only been going out with him for a matter of a few days!'' Tasha disagreed with her, replying to Rachael's statement. Rachael laughed again in response, delightfully happy as she got her mobile out of her jean pocket and began texting.

I had my money down on it being Jackson. The cheeky 'mare had rubbed it in our faces, telling us that they had been texting each other ever since the very first night that we had met the Guys. And speaking of texting…

I was sure that Rob had been flirting with me a little bit last night, just a little bit when we were on the phone. Not a lot, but it was enough for me to notice it, even though he had told me that we were _friends_. But I had already successfully convinced myself that it was all in my head. I mean I had been dreaming about this Guy since I was like fifteen, so it was an easy mistake to make when you fancy someone so much, right?

Rachael didn't seem to think so. Since this morning, she had been trying to make me believe that Rob had the hots for me, but of course I knew better. This was Rob, the Guy who was supposed to be getting ever closer to his co-star of his new film that he was working on as-well as Kerry the Ex.

Of course I still felt a little jealous. I would be lying if I said that I wasn't. But it was seriously not right. I always got this…crazy, painful jealousy when it came to him. It was irrational; irrational and awful.

I absolutely hated feeling like the way I sometimes did, but I was getting better. Ever since I started college with the Girls a few years ago, back in England, I was getting better slowly. Because I knew that there would never be a Rob and Charlie in the same sentence when talking about dating.

I turned and looked across the road to the Starbucks restaurant. I hadn't been into an American Starbucks yet, and I was so badly dying to get a hot chocolate. I just knew that the Starbucks cafes in America was way better than the cafes in England.

However I couldn't help but gasp and totally froze as I saw the Guy say at the table, next to the window in Starbucks. OH MY FREAKING GOD!

''What is it?'' Tasha asked me confused.

''What's wrong?'' Kirsty asked me worriedly.

''What have you seen that you like in Starbucks then?'' Rachael asked me jokingly, and I rolled my eyes due to the fact that I knew she was on about the people not the service there. But this Guy…he definitely had caught my eye…again.

''That's the College Guy.'' I spelled it out for him, so sure that it was. I had met 'the college Guy' four and a half years ago whilst in college in England. We were always glancing at each other across the hall, but nothing came off it because I was too slow.

He always smiled when I looked his way, but when I was about to go and ask him out, I hadn't seen him about in college anymore. I was so gutted, but I knew that was definitely him. There was no faking him!

He looked a little older, more matured than how he looked a few years ago. In fact, his hair looked a little more curly that it used to be. His face had aged a little bit, but not much, and that same gloriously happy smile was written on his face.

There was no way that I was seeing things. Despite how long I had not seen him, I knew there was no mistaking that face. He was and still looked as cute as hell. I could admit that I was still single, like how I had been for the last five years.

I had had a few dates with Boys, but that didn't include any kissing, no holding hands, no cuddling…nothing. And especially not anything close enough to sleeping together. Embarrassingly so at twenty two, I was still a Virgin.

Great, it was nice to see that to back up the Girls claims of me being 'beautiful' nobody actually wanted me. Yeah right Girls, I was so beautiful yet nobody on this Earth wanted anything to do with me.

Hell yeah. Dead sexy. Not.

''Who's the College Guy?'' Tasha asked me confused. They didn't even remember themselves, but I certainly did. There was no way that I could forget about that hotness.

''Yeah who is the College Guy and where have you been hiding him for all this time?'' Kirsty asked in shock. I knew why though; it was a first to recognize any Guy besides sex god himself of course.

''The College Guy Kirsty; the Guy we always talked about in College. The Guy who kept staring at me across the dinner hall?'' I reminded her. Rachael gasped in shock as the Girls remembered who I was talking about.

''No way!'' Tasha exclaimed in shock.

''That cant be him, surely not!'' Rachael gasped in shock.

''Well it looks just like him. A little bit older looking, more curly hair, but its definitely him.'' I told them, because it was so true. He still looked exactly like the same person I imagined, only a little older looking.

''Well go in there and see if it is.'' Tasha encouraged me, but I flushed red in response to the idea. It was a silly idea, and that was because of one thing; I was far too shy and embarrassed about doing things like that.

I always needed someone with me, making sure that I wasn't making a idiot of myself, like how I always was. And there was also the promise that Kirsty made to me…about getting Nick's number before he left, but being too late. She still owed me, big time!

''Urm…well I cant go on my own! I'll just look like an idiot! Cant someone come with me?'' I begged them.

''Charlie, you like him, so you go for it.'' Kirsty encouraged me, making me huff in response. The Girls knew how shy I was at this sort of thing!

''I cant just go for it, because he'll just think I'm an idiot. Cant you come with me Kirsty? After all you did promise me to help get his number before, but he wasn't at college when he left.'' I reminded her.

''Okay, I'll go with you, but here's the plan; you buy a hot chocolate, I walk you over to him and you do the talking alright?'' She asked me. I nodded in response, as it sounded like a pretty fair deal to me. After all I hadn't been interested in this Guy for years.

''Okay then, and thanks Kirsty!'' I shouted in delight. I couldn't believe that I actually had the chance to meet the Guy I used to fancy again.

''We'll wait for you here Girls.'' Tasha promised us, and we nodded in response.

Kirsty grinned in response, and followed me over to the café. I walked in the star-bucks café first, and threw a look at him. That was definitely College Boy without a doubt. I knew for a fact that it was now.

I looked back quickly because I had always made my staring so obvious back in college and ordered a hot chocolate. I grabbed my drink quickly, and was about to walk back out again before I flashed another look at college Boy before I left.

''Go to the back door.'' Kirsty commanded next to me. I looked back at the back door, which was past college Boy and a the back of the café.

''But that means I have to walk past him!'' I warned her, starting to panic. I wasn't sure that I could actually do it without tripping over my feet or something. But Kirsty just rolled her eyes in response.

''You promised me that you would walk past him and at least try and speak to him so come on. This is what you could need you know Charlie. You spent so long wanting to meet Rob that you hadn't given any Guy a chance.'' She was right; I had been so focused on coming to LA and meeting my sex god that I hadn't given any thought about love, but that's because I hadn't needed to.

Me and Rob may have been talking with each other a bit, but that was nothing. It didn't mean much to him, and I knew that he was probably just having a laugh. I mean…I was just a fan anyway, right?

''You're right.'' I forced myself to agree.

''I mean if this is him-'

''-It is.''

''Then you should give him a chance. See if he wants to get to know you.'' She told me truthfully. I nodded.

''You're right.'' I agreed with her, walking up to him, and feeling my heart hammering in my chest just as he was about to get up…

I gasped in shock as Kirsty pushed me into him at just the right time that he was getting up, and I spilt my hot chocolate all over him. He gasped in pain as the scolding hot chocolate spilt onto his clean black vest making his chest more clearer to see; his muscles clearer for me to see now. I blushed and quickly looked away again.

''Oh my god Kirsty, you are dead!'' I warned her, turning round and glaring at her. But she was already running through the front door. I huffed in response, feeling absolutely livid with her 'helping'.

''Yeah, just you run girl! Wait until I get my hands on you!'' I threatened before turning back round to see College Boy whimpering still in shock as the hot chocolate continued to burn his chest.

He tried to pull the ultra tight vest away from his body to make it stop hurting him as much as the scolding hot chocolate must have been hurting him. ''Ouch…this is just my luck.'' He complained under his breathe.

I took in his amazing London accent, and I knew then that it couldn't be anyone else. His voice was perfect; not too manly sounding or girly sounding; just in the middle. He had an amazingly rough kinda voice, yet it still sounded perfectly velvet and cool.

''Oh, I am so sorry!'' I apologized, hoping that he would forgive me. I doubted that much though after I had spilt steaming hot chocolate down him. I mean, it was just the exact fucking thing that I would do!

Staff was already gathering around him, and a pretty young lady handed him a few wipes for him to use. She fluttered her eyelashes at him, but he was too busy cleaning himself down. I gulped as I awaited my fate from college guy, who would surely tell me to fuck off.

''Hey, that's no biggie! By my standards, it would usually be me that-'' His face darted up, ready to grin at me. But instead, he didn't. His eyes widened in shock as he looked at me, and I was half inspecting him to insult me after I was such an idiot to him.

''Oh my god...you're-you're…college Girl, aren't you?'' He asked in shock, making me shocked too. Did he actually remember who I was? No way!

''Urm…depends what you mean by college Girl.'' I replied, looking back down at the floor and blushing a bright red. ''Are you the College Guy I was checking out five years ago or do you not remember that far back?'' I asked, knowing that I sounded like an idiot, and that he would probably tell me that he didn't know what I was going on about…but he didn't.

''Yeah, in college at The Regional College in Peterborough.'' I gasped in shock, and instantly looked back to him. He was smiling again now, and not just that, but he was smiling at _me_. It was almost like he had been waiting for me, like I for him.

Like it was fate.

''Oh my god…its actually you! The Guy I checked out at college all that time.''

''And the Girl that I had said to my mates was fit.'' He admitted, making me giggle embarrassedly in response. ''You have a nice laugh.'' He commented, making me blush even more. God, the Guy was such a charmer!

''Sorry…I'm Nick by the way. Nick Sutherland.'' He grinned at me again, using his charm that he had perfectly, and making me giggle again in response.

''Charlie………Charlie Higgins.'' I grimaced as I told him my full name, because I hated my last name. I didn't use my full first name which was Charlotte, because I preferred Charlie, not Charlotte.

''Oh cool…is that like short anything or is it just Charlie?''

''Well my name's Charlotte, but I prefer Charlie.'' I admitted, blushing again once I said my full name. the truth was I thought Charlotte was far too much of a posh name for someone like me to have.

He grinned again, and took my hand to shake. Wow. His hands were the most loveliest hands that I had the pleasure to touch. They were warm, pleasantly so, and strong, but not too strong. Just enough to give the right kind of grip…

''Well its been lovely meeting you Charlie, but I have to go to the studio where I work for dance practice.'' He admitted with a heavy sigh. It seemed as though he didn't want to go, and the truth was that I didn't want him to go yet either.

We had only just started talking to each other, and the more we continued to talk, the more I got to like him.

''So you're still a dancer then? That's really cool.'' I confessed, because I thought that it was. There was nothing embarrassing about a Guy being a Dancer. I thought it was pretty awesome myself.

''Ur yeah…awesome. I'm glad that you think so.'' He agreed with us, giving me a cheeky grin as he spoke. I laughed in response, because he didn't sound too sure about what other people might think to his dancing, but it was nothing to be ashamed off.

He had talent, which was cool, and he must have loved dancing otherwise he wouldn't have been doing it.

''Well…I'll see you around then, yeah?'' I asked him hesitantly, turning to leave.

''Wait!'' He begged, his hand reaching out and stopping me before I had the chance to move elsewhere. I turned back round and looked at him confused.

''Look, I know that I've just met you, but…can I have your number? I wanted to er…well to ask you if er…if you'd go on a date with me sometime?'' he asked me unsure. I smiled in response to his stuttering of words, and nervous way.

''I'd love to.'' I promised him because I did.

''Great, well if you type your number into my phone, I'll ring you later.'' He promised me, even though I didn't think that he really would. I mean Nick was fit, and I mean really fit, and in good shape too, and here was boring, little _me_.

I keyed in my address too, just in-case things went well. I mean give me a break, I had only had one proper Boyfriend in my life who turned out to be a proper creep, and I was already twenty two.

He grinned as he took his phone back and saw that I had keyed in my address too. ''Cool, I know where that is. It's just around the corner from here, right?''

''Yeah, that's right.'' I agreed.

''Cool,'' he grinned. ''Well I might pop round later and-''

''-No, no, no!'' I interrupted him without thinking. Tonight the twilight cast was round ours to see us again, and I didn't really want to bring anyone round if I was honest, as it was going to be just us tonight.

''It's just that…its going to be me and the Girls tonight…maybe tomorrow. That will be cool.'' I added quickly.

He nodded, going back to grinning. ''Okay cool…well I'll definitely see you around then. I'll give you a text later, is that alright?'' he asked me unsure.

''Yeah, course.'' I replied, smiling back as my blush only got more redder. ''I'll speak to you later then.'' I agreed with him before walking out of the café.

''Yeah bye.'' He said again, and as soon as I was out of the café, and had my back to him, I grinned at the Girls. I ran over to them, and screamed my head off. Literally.

''OH MY GOD GIRLS!!!'' I screamed as Tasha watched me in shock. ''He actually asked me out on a date and everything! And we swapped numbers too!'' I bragged happily. The Girls all laughed, as we started to walk to the shopping centre for Tasha.

''So come on then, give us all the details.'' Tasha begged.

''Yeah you just have to tell us everything darling!'' Rachael confirmed, making me giggle even more.

''Well Kirsty slammed me into him, and I spilt my hot chocolate all over him. THANKS KIRSTY!'' I growled at her.

She laughed and shrugged innocently in response. ''What, you got his number, didn't you?'' She asked me playfully.

''Well actually no, but I'll get to that bit later.'' I told her making Tasha laugh.

''He recognized me as the college girl and…said that he told his mates that he had thought I was fit.'' I added.

Rachael raised here eyebrows and Tasha laughed in response. ''Well,'' Tasha said, sounding in shock. I giggled again.

''He's still a Dancer, and he had to like go and go to the dance studio. Which explains his muscles.'' I added making Tasha laugh in response.

''Charlie, you little minx!'' Rachael replied, making us all laugh again.

''Oh and what? He was well fit!'' I replied, giggling in response to how immature I sounded. I was twenty two and I had never really looked at Guys before, and here I was, checking one out, and calling him 'fit'. But he was.

''So then what happened?'' Tasha asked me curiously. I knew by the sound of her voice that she was just dying to know…and I was dying to tell her.

''Well he asked for my number, and I typed it in his phone for him, as well as my house address. He wanted to come round tonight but I wouldn't let him-''

''-Why not? You should have let him come, it would have been fun!'' Rachael complained. ''We could have gotten him drunk, and well yeah…you two could have er…had a bit of privacy.'' She added making Tasha shake her head in response.

I huffed at her. ''Privacy? What with you around Rachael?'' I joked. She laughed in response to that. ''Well the Guys are coming round tonight aren't' they?'' I reminded him.

''So-'' Tasha began to ask confused, but she was cut off by Rachael.

''-Oh I know why! Because you want to have a bit of time with your sex god. Not hoping something will happen by any chance?'' Rachael asked me, making me snicker. She had a brain of a sewer, I was sure of it.

''No Rachael, because I want to spend some time with you Girls.'' I lied a little. I wanted to spend time with both him and the Guys.

''Uh hum, oh I bet!'' Tasha replied disbelievingly, making me roll my eyes at her in response. It wasn't that hard to believe…right? No, it wasn't that hard to believe.

As soon as we were finished shopping; I went upstairs and tried on the dress that I had just brought for tonight to wear.

It was very pretty, with flowers at the bottom of the dress, and an almost two-tones style to it, and I decided to wear it tonight, after I got a shower.

I washed my hair ready for tonight, and did my make-up ready, doing my hair too. I heard everyone downstairs already as I got dressed into my dress and high heels, and I waited up here; feeling too nervous to go upstairs yet.

***


	11. Awkward

I heard two knocks on the door as I put my mascara on, and I listened carefully for any sign of who it was. If it was Kirsty asking me to come downstairs again to get drunk, I wouldn't be happy.

She had been screaming it at the door now for twenty minutes, because for once, it was Kirsty to be absolutely drunk already.

''Charlie?'' My heart started beating erratically in my chest in response to the Man calling my name through the door. It was Rob, it was actually Rob. ''Rachael gave me permission to come and knock.'' Rob added awkwardly, laughing it off.

I smiled in response, trying not to laugh too, as I got up from my dressing room chair, and walked towards the bedroom door. I unlocked the door, and walked out, smiling at him. He had already taken my breathe away.

He had done that the moment I stepped out of my bedroom, and looked at him. Because he had that amazing effect on me. He was wearing a smart, black polo neck, which had a few buttons undone, and dark jeans on, with some cool, casual converses too.

His hair had been cut, and he looked amazing; in a stunning kind of way. He smiled back at me, catching my breathe once more, as he stared at me.

''Urm…are you ready to go downstairs, or do you want me to wait downstairs for you?'' He asked me, sounding as though he wasn't sure. I smiled in response, and nodded. Because I was practically ready to go downstairs anyway, so I would just go now.

''I'm ready. And you look really nice today, by the way.'' I added, because I found it easier to tell him things like that now. He smiled again at me in response as he lead the way down the stairs. But just that smile had got me captured once more.

''Thanks, but you still manage to outdo me.'' He replied, chuckling as he said that. I rolled my eyes in response, sure that that wasn't true, and followed him into the hallway, where I still couldn't hear any noise from anyone in the house.

''By the way,'' Rob added casually. ''Tasha's still in her room, because apparently that Adam and her have broken up, because he was cheating on her apparently.'' Rob warned me, looking shocked as he told me it.

''Oh my god…you're joking, right?'' I asked him in shock. But he shook his head to tell me that he really wasn't joking.

''No, I heard from Rachael.''

''God, what a jerk.'' I complained as we walked out to the kitchen together, and I opened a bottle of red WKD to drink. ''I could literally hit him for that.'' I added furiously, downing my bottle of WKD.

''Do you want to go into the living room?'' I asked him, because then we would be alone, free to talk. I could already hear everyone outside, and I knew that it would be best if I left Tasha on her own for a minute to chill out and clam down a bit.

''Okay.'' Rob agreed, following me into the living room. We both sat down on the sofa together, and I ignored the usual closeness of him as usual, because we were just friends, and I knew that he was going to be a good friend to me from now on.

Unlike some other people, next door!

''I still cant believe that he cheated on her like that. I'm so mad now.'' I admitted furiously. I downed my WKD bottle, and put it back on the table, empty.

''Don't be mad.'' Rob begged, reaching out and pressing his hand gently into the side of my arm. That sizzling chemistry once again turned into burning, yearning fire. I looked up in shock, whilst trying to ignore the yearning for him in the pit of my stomach.

''By the sounds of it, Tasha gave him a good punch around the face.'' He added, chuckling as he thought about it, and ignoring the shocked look that I knew was still on my face. I laughed in response, happy to hear that.

''Good. It sounds like the wanker deserved a punch too.'' I admitted, frowning unhappily as I thought about how much of a loser this Adam really was!

Rob's eyes darted up for a moment then, and I looked round in time to see Tasha standing there, in the doorway. I smiled at her, hoping that she was okay, after the way that arsehole had treated my best friend….and Mom of course.

''Are you okay; Rach told us?'' I asked her, knowing that I sounded as panicked as I felt right now.

She grinned at me, and rolled her eyes in response. ''I'm fine, really. Stop panicking!'' She asked me, knowing that I always panicked.

''Well okay…but if you need someone to talk to, I'm always here, okay?'' I asked her, because I knew that she always found it easier to turn to Rachael and talk to her. I couldn't blame her because Rachael was more understanding than me, but…I wished that she would talk to me a little more.

''Thanks, where is everyone?'' She asked me, and I noticed how she changed the subject quickly. I sighed heavily in response.

''In the garden.'' I replied, smiling. I turned back, and looked at Rob, who of course was smiling too; which took my breathe away…again.

''So…should we do dares tonight? I think that we should.'' I asked him, giggling. I think I was feeling a little drunk by now, and I was more than sure that the alcohol had gone to my head. Rob laughed in response.

''Are you feeling okay?'' He asked me concerned, giving me a funny look. ''Or is this where you start getting more and more louder gradually?'' He asked me casually. I giggled in response, blushing bright red, and drinking another bottle of WKD that I had gotten hold of.

''I'm feeling fine…a little drunk maybe.'' I admitted, hiding my face in the side of his arm, and blushing bright red in response to how happy I felt now. I heard him laugh quietly too in response to that.

''You blush a lot.'' He commented, making me cringe further into the side of his arm in response. ''Do I make you blush a lot?'' He asked again. I gasped in shock about him actually asking me like that, and so up front.

He didn't seem to be like that normally.

''Urm…'' I trailed off.

''Urm?'' he asked me, tipping my head back, so that he could see my face properly. I blushed a brighter red, as his thumb gently stroked the side of my face. He watched me closely for a moment before he slowly started to tip his face forward to mine. My eyes widened in shock, because I had to stop him.

Two knocks at the door saved me for kissing him, like this, when I had already agreed to go on a date with someone else. I breathed a sigh of relief, feeling guilty about the way that I wanted so badly to kiss him, and climbed up from the sofa quickly.

''I'll get it!'' I shouted, just in-case anybody else in the garden heard the knocks on the door. I smiled at Rob apologetically as he watched me walk out of the living room to see who was at the door.

I ran the door, and pulled the door open successfully; gasping in shock as I saw who was stood there. Oh my fucking god, what could I do now?!

''Nick!'' I gasped again in shock. The Guy grinned at me in response; his cute smile stretching over his feminine, pink cheeks. He had pale skin, but adorable, pink cheeks, and his brown hair was the same dark colour as his hair; curly, and wild.

He was wearing a white, casual T-Shirt with a round neck, and had black, swirls on it. He was wearing a smart, black suit over the casual T-Shirt, and he wore dark jeans, with awesome converses.

But now wasn't the time to take in what he was wearing. I was panicking, and trying to ignore how happy I was at how he was here. I didn't deserve to feel happy, because Rob was in the living room, and we had just almost kissed!

''I'm sorry if this is like…freaky. But er…I just wanted to make sure that I got the right house, I was sure that I'd got the address wrong or something stupid. It's so me.'' He admitted, laughing awkwardly.

''Urm…yeah. I'd probably do the same.'' I admitted, trying to look back whilst I talked to make sure that Rob wasn't out of the living room door yet. I had such a bad feeling about this, and I was getting more and more worked up in-case Rob saw this.

I looked back at the door again, to see that Nick had brought a bottle of WKD with him, which made me feel guilty. Nick caught me looking, and laughed again awkwardly in response to being caught with it.

''Ur…yeah. I brought some drinks with me just in-case. I don't really drink WKD, but I thought that maybe you would appreciate it.'' He admitted, shrugging easily as he passed the bottles to me.

I smiled at him. ''Thanks so much…you really didn't have to do that.'' I promised him, because he really didn't have to. It had been so kind to offer some drink, when I had been rude enough not to invite him in the first place.

He grinned at me again, showing off his perfectly white, straight teeth that he had again. ''That's okay, no problem.'' He insisted, shrugging easily. His eyes looked up then, and he scanned the empty hallway, looking for something or other.

''Urm, do you mind if I come in, or…'' he trailed off, hoping that I would say yes. He smiled at me hopefully, but yet expecting me to say no too. I smiled apologetically at him, wishing that I could be alone with Nick now.

''I'm sorry, it's just that…well, I just…well, I have company.'' I admitted, hoping that he would understand. His dark eyes widened a little bit, and he nodded his head once, as if understanding what I was saying.

''Oh, I understand.'' Nick promised me, frowning. I watched him confused, wondering if he really did understand why I was doing this, and why he was frowning for. I wanted him to know exactly why now wasn't the best time.

''You do?'' I asked him confused. He nodded, still frowning at me sadly as he passed me the bottles of WKD. I took them from him, still watching him confused. I didn't want him to think that I was just being rude.

''Yep, I worked it out.'' He promised me, making me even more confused. He carried on. ''Well obviously you have…company as in….romantic company-''

''No, no, no, no! You're wrong, no.'' I told him, because he was. Me and Rob were still friends, even if he had gone to try and kiss me. And I had agreed on a date with Nick, who seemed really nice.

''No, you see,'' I started, pushing him out of the door, and shutting it behind me, so that I could talk to him more privately.

''Here's the thing,'' I started, clearing my throat to get ready to tell him the whole truth. ''I moved to Los Angeles with the Girls because we wanted to meet some people who we all liked…the twilight movie cast.'' I explained to him, hoping that he would understand.

He nodded, telling me that he did understand, and I carried on. ''Well my friends all like different people. Rachael likes Jackson Rathbone, Tasha likes Kellan Lutz, and I…well…I like er…Rob Pattinson.'' I admitted, forcing the name out of my mouth, and trying so hard not to blush in response as I said the name.

Nick nodded, looking as though he was struggling to see where I was going with this. I smiled at him in response, taking in his beautiful face, which had more of feminine look about it rather than Rob's face.

But Nick's face was still beautiful, just in a very different, particular way. But I couldn't deny that I had a good feeling about agreeing to this date with Rob now.

''Right well here's the thing, Nick.'' I told him, starting to explain more. He nodded; his forehead creased a little bit as he concentrated hard, with small, delicate lines on his forehead as he did, before his face broke into a huge, cheeky smile.

''I like the way that you say my name.'' He admitted, catching me off-guard. I blushed bright red in response, and giggled helplessly. He laughed in response, happy that I was happy. ''And you really do have a nice laugh.'' He added, making me blush again.

''Stop it, I'm trying to explain here!'' I warned him.

''Oh right, yeah sorry.'' He apologized sincerely, going straight back to looking at me with serious eyes, and a furrowed, concentrating forehead; telling me to carry on explaining and tell him more.

I smiled in response, but carried on. ''Well, the twilight cast are in my house now. As in Kellan, Jackson, and er…Rob too.'' I admitted, watching his face, his expressions as he took that in properly.

He nodded a few times, before he looked at me in shock; as if he actually just realized that what I was saying was actually true. ''So…the twilight guys…are in you're house now?'' He asked me in shock.

''Yep.'' I replied, watching his shocked face as he looked past me, and in the closed doorway, past the door.

''Well…I suppose I better let you get partying now that I'd brought the drinks round then.'' He forced himself to agree, turning round to leave. I sighed unhappily, feeling so badly guilty that he had to leave.

It wasn't fair after he had brought drinks round too, and I didn't want him to leave yet. He was really nice, and I found that I could speak to him really easily, compared to anyone else who I had just met.

I felt confident around him, and he seemed like the nicest person and the most genuine Guy that you could ever meet. He seemed a little stupid, but I realized that he only acted stupid when he was more nervous.

When he was okay about things, calm, he actually seemed more like himself; clever. And he was clever, there was no denying that. And yet despite how brainy and cute he was, he seemed to genially like me.

''Nick, I'd like you to stay.'' I admitted, because it was true. I did want him to stay now, and I wanted him to enjoy the remainder of the party with me. Because now that we were dating, I wanted him to meet Rob, and the rest of my friends.

He turned back round, and glanced at me in shock. He was confused, especially as I couldn't get rid of him quick enough a moment ago. A happy, delighted smile spread across his face in response.

This made me happy, because he had such a cute smile, and I would do anything just to get to see that cute smile again.

''Are you sure that you want me to stay? I mean you don't have to say yes, just because you feel sorry for me-''

''-Of course not, silly. Anyway, we had already agreed to a date, so…I'd like to spend a bit of time with you.'' I admitted, because it was true. Nick's smile only got wider as he followed me through the front door.

''Well I'm glad that you should say that, because I happened to be thinking about you today. A lot.'' He admitted, not at all sounding embarrass as he admitted this, making me blush as we walked into the hallway.

''Well, that's good to hear.'' I giggled helplessly as we made our way near to the living room door. I was going to go past it and put the drinks down, ready to open, but I stopped dead when Rob walked out of the living room.

My eyes widened in shock as he looked from me to Nick, looking in as much shock as I was in right now. I could tell by Rob's face though, that he understood, that he knew what was going on. With me and Nick.

''This is er…Nick.'' I explained, looking away from him quickly, because I felt as though I was stuck in the middle here.

''Hi, you must be Rob, right?'' Nick checked, stepping forward and grinning at Rob politely. I was pleased when Rob smiled back at Nick politely, even though he still didn't look as though he was too happy about this.

''Yeah, and you're Nick?'' He asked as he shook Nick's outstretched hand and shook it. Nick nodded, stepping back again, to my side.

''Yeah, it's good to meet you. Charlie was just telling me about you outside.'' Nick admitted, still looking as happy as he had looked since he had first got here. That was because Nick seemed to be a typically happy person all the time, and he seemed so kind too.

''Cool…so are you staying for the rest of the party?'' Rob asked Nick, sounding as though as he really wasn't bothered whether Nick stayed or not. I didn't blame him; he had every reson to feel annoyed after the…well the moment we shared before Nick arrived.

''Yeah, if that's okay with Charlie.'' Automatically, Nick and Rob's eyes looked to me for an answer for that one. Oh great, as if I didn't feel awkward and guilty as it already was. I smiled at them both, shrugging.

''Well sure…I'd love you too.'' I replied, smiling awkwardly at Nick.

He grinned back at me, just as happy as I was. Though I still felt guilty after the way that I had left things with Rob. ''Awesome…do you want me to put them bottles in the kitchen for you?'' Nick asked me politely. I smiled at him, and shook my head in response.

''No, that's okay, thanks. I'll just go and do it now.'' I promised him. ''Do you want anything to drink?'' I asked Nick politely, trying to ignore how Rob was still watching us. But it was very, very difficult.

And my heart was aching inside my chest due to the fact that I still felt stuck in the middle of the two now. Nick seemed everything that I liked; he was kind, sweet, funny, and he was very polite too. Not to mention cute.

But Rob was…everything that I _wanted_. He was kind, polite, gentle, kind, and he had been what I had been looking for, for so long. I loved him in such weird, fan way, but Kirsty was right when I met Nick.

Nick might be exactly what I needed for me to get over Rob, and it would have been healthier for me to get over my obsession with Rob. Maybe Nick's arrival in LA had been a sign, to tell me that now was the time for me to get over it.

Obviously, it wouldn't be easy. But like giving up any obsession, it wouldn't be. And me and Rob could still be friends, I just wanted to carry on seeing Nick too. Because I couldn't choose between them.

''Ur yeah, sure, please.'' Nick replied politely, following me into the kitchen, and helping me get some more drinks out, and putting them on the kitchen table. I looked back to Rob to see that his bottle of beer was empty too now.

''Rob,'' I called to him. ''Do you want another beer?''

''Yes please.'' He replied, sounding a little annoyed at how we had left things before Nick arrived. I grimaced in response, but carried on getting the drinks out anyway. I handed Rob another bottle of beer, ignoring his eyes that I felt on me.

''Ur…Nick, what did you want to drink?'' I asked him, noticing that he had said that he didn't drink WKD.

''Urm…have you got any more beer?''

''Sure, here you go.'' I smiled at him, handing him a beer bottle to drink.

''Thanks.''

For a moment, I looked up, and straight into the eyes of Rob, who was still watching me closely, like before. I blushed bright red, and looked away again quickly.

I heard Tasha coming downstairs then, and I caught her with her suitcase in hand. ''Where are you going?'' I asked her in shock, walking back out to the hallway to see her. I watched her in shock, because she was supposed to be going tomorrow, after saying goodbye to Kellan, when he got here in an hour.

''To the airport. Why?'' She asked me as she got ready to leave.

''What, now? But you said you weren't going until tomorrow!'' I reminded her, still in shock as she prepared herself to leave. I felt myself getting worked up about this, and I knew that if she left now, I was definitely going to cry.

''Well it's the only space they had; so I had to take it. I've got to leave in half an hour, to get there in time.''

''But you cant go!'' I warned her, feeling as though I was so badly close to crying. I had to hold back the tears now.

''I will be back, I promise. But I want to go back for a while.'' She warned me, smiling. I nodded, forcing a smile back.

''Are you sure that you'll be back?'' I asked her, because she just had to be back here. This was all our homes now.

''Yes, this was all our dreams. I'm not going to let you live it without me.'' She warned me, smiling at me. I forced a smile back, but then I remembered that Kellan wasn't even going to be round before she left again.

''But Kellan isn't here yet!'' I warned her.

''Well, I cant wait for him. I'm going to phone for a taxi.'' She told me, walking to the door and ringing. I sighed and walked into the living room, where everyone all was now, including Nick and Rob.

I sat down on the floor, next to Nick, and trying not to cry. ''Hey, are you okay? You look as though you're about to cry.'' Nick said considerately. His hand instantly brushed my arm, and took my hand in his, to try and comfort me.

I smiled at him in response, squeezing his hand in mine, and thanking him silently as I rested my head on his shoulder. I didn't even look to see if Rob was watching, because I was too upset with Tasha leaving.

We said our goodbyes to Tasha, and she went then, with Kellan arriving an hour later, just after Nick had gone home. Rob was still here, but I was too busy telling Kellan about Tasha going back home to talk to him yet.

''I cant believe she's actually gone.'' Kellan said glumly, and that was it.

I ran out the living room, starting to cry, and I ran out out the back door, sitting on the outdoor, swing sofa.

''Charlie.'' I looked round to see that Rob had followed me out, seeing me crying. I sighed in response, shaking my head.

''I don't want to talk now, Rob.'' I told him, hoping that he understood. And he did. He took a seat next to me, and pulled me to his side, resting my head against his arm. For once, I didn't much notice the spark between us, because I was still so upset.

***

**Another chapter of both this story and Finding home will be up tomorrow!**


	12. Twilight bud

_**I had stopped crying a while after Tasha left, though I felt a little tired now. My head was still resting on Rob's arm, and his hand was still rubbing gently against my back. I was glad that I had him to rely on though. It was good to have him as a friend, now that my very best friend had gone back home again. **_

''_**Are you alright now?'' Rob asked me quietly, after I had stopped crying. I nodded against his arm, welcoming an arm that he wrapped around me, as he tried to comfort me. It felt nice, like this, and I was a little surprised after the awkwardness of tonight. **_

''_**Do you want to go back inside?'' He asked me. **_

''_**No, not yet please.'' I begged, because I wanted to stay with him for the minute. I needed to speak to him anyway, so I knew that it would be better if I spoke to him now, rather than later. I still wanted to meet up with Nick. **_

_**But I also really wanted to be friends with Rob, because moments like these, meant the world to me. But Nick was exactly what I needed right now to help me grow up and get over this obsession of mine. And it was about time that I did. **_

''_**Okay.'' Rob agreed quietly, keeping his arm around me. I had heard before that Rob found it difficult with people crying, but you could never tell. I pulled away from his arms though, and wiped the tears away from my face. **_

_**I sat back in the chair, feeling his eyes on me as I tried to calm myself down. ''Sorry.'' I apologized, hating that the fact that he had to comfort me, and we hadn't even known for me very long. **_

''_**Don't apologize. You're best friend's just left, it's normal to feel upset.'' He promised me, making me smile. He was so sweet, especially with how tonight had come about between us. Which brought me to the subject changer. **_

''_**Rob, I…'' I trailed off, not too sure on what I should tell him. I wanted to be his friend, or at least try to be. I still wanted Nick to be in my life too, because I really liked him. ''I'm sorry about tonight.'' I apologized, knowing that he would understand exactly what I meant. **_

''_**It's okay.'' He promised me, before going quiet again. I rested my head on his arm again, hoping that he wouldn't mind. It was nice like this, to be friends, like how I knew that we would be. **_

_**He wrapped his arms around me then, as if he thought that I might cry again, and my arms wrapped around his, thanking him silently for being a friend, even if I probably didn't deserve it tonight. **_

''_**Thanks.'' I whispered, trying so hard not to cry right now. Not cry because I was unhappy, even though I was still upset about Tasha leaving, but also because I was happy; because Rob was in my life, as a friend, and he meant a lot to me. **_

''_**It's okay.'' He whispered back, before going quiet again. I stayed there, in his arms for a few minutes, before pulling away again, to look at him. He watched me back, still expecting me to cry, by the looks of things. **_

_**He gently removed a strand of hair that had got in the way of my face, watching me the whole time. He watched me closely, as that same, let down feeling was burning in my stomach. Yearning, need. **_

_**This addiction was definitely going to be hard to give up, especially with that aching chemistry still evident in the way that he was still holding me; his arms wrapped around me tightly, his eyes watching me closely. **_

''_**Rob…'' I started, trailing off, and pulling away from him again. I looked away as his arms fell away from me, and I glanced across the garden. I decided that this would probably be easier if I did this without looking at him, because I would find it easier to get my words out right without stuttering. **_

''_**I want to be friends with you. I'd like that a lot.'' I admitted, because it was true. He took my hand in his, and I ignored the burning, yearning need sizzling as soon as our skin touched. It wasn't important. **_

''_**I'd like that a lot too, Charlie.'' He admitted, squeezing my hand which was still gently laced with his. **_

''_**I'm so glad to hear that.'' I said, sighing happily. **_

''_**Do you want to go inside now? I think Kellan needs cheering up.'' He added. **_

_**I laughed in response. ''What, with Rachael in there? She's probably spiking his drinks with vodka by now.'' I admitted, because it was probably true, knowing Rachael. It was something that she would do. **_

_**Rob laughed too, and got me up then, ready to go inside, and make sure that Rachael wasn't up to her normal mischief. It was a hard job being a friend, but someone had to do it, and I was quite happy to. **_

_**I saw Kellan in the hallway, as me and Rob walked by, still hand in hand, with our arms swinging back and forward, as we strolled through the house, happily. I stopped smiling as soon as I saw Kellan, and we stopped in front of Kellan. **_

''_**Hey, you alright?'' I asked him. He nodded, smiling at us. I smiled back, knowing that he missed Tasha as much as the twilight Buds did. **_

''_**Yeah, although I miss Tasha.'' He admitted, his smile fading a little bit as he mentioned Tasha's name. **_

''_**I know, it wont be the same without her. But at least she's coming back, I'm counting down the days already.'' I admitted, making Kellan laugh. I laughed too, because it was hard not to worth Kellan around. **_

_**He had such a Boyish, happy laugh. ''Well watch out, because Rachael's providing all the entertainment in there for the time being.'' He admitted, laughing again as he warned us. I rolled my eyes in response. **_

''_**Oh god, here we go.'' I groaned, making him laugh again. **_

''_**I'll be in a sec.'' He promised, winking at me, as he passed me to go to the bathroom. I smiled, and followed Rob into the living room, to see…oh god. **_

_**Rachael was in the middle of the room, definitely providing all of the entertainment. She was dancing…with Jackson, and er…not in a great, family oriented way. I groaned in embarrassment, and quickly looked away. **_

_**I blushed bright red in response to my friend's embarrassing ways. Of course Jackson was enjoying it, but then he would. He was a typical Guy. **_

_**I looked up in time to see Rachael laughing in response to how embarrassed I looked, and she stopped dancing, and got some vodka out. ''No need to be embarrassed darling, the Boys are very much enjoying it.'' She promised, winking at me. **_

_**I rolled my eyes in response, watching Rachael pour a bit of vodka into a bottle of beer carefully. ''What are you doing Rachael?'' I asked her confused. She did not drink beer, so it was definitely not hers. **_

''_**Just helping Kellan cheer up a little bit, darling.'' She replied, making me sigh. As if vodka was going to help!**_

''_**Rachael, you're spiking his bloody drink!'' I warned her, taking the vodka bottle off of her as she tried to tip a bit more into Kellan's beer bottle. **_

''_**Do you want him to be upset all night, or do you want him to have a bit of fun, like how we're having?'' She asked me, taking the vodka bottle off of me and tipping a little bit more in Kellan's beer bottle, before putting the lid back on. **_

_**I sighed heavily, watching her in shock as she grinned, and stirred the beer bottle before putting it back down again on the table, where it was. ''There we go. Maybe he'll start enjoying himself then.'' Rachael confirmed happily.**_

_**I rolled my eyes again in response, because I had a feeling that it would take a bit more than a bit of vodka to make him happy again. He seemed really upset when Tasha left, just like how we all were. **_

_**I sat down next to Rob on the sofa, and watched as Kellan walked back into the living room, and sipped on his bottle of beer. Rachael watched, grinning as he sat back on the sofa, and smiled at everyone happily. **_

_**Bless, well as long as it made him happy then I wouldn't care. I knew by the short time that we had all spent together that Kellan had really liked Tasha, and it was nice to see how they were getting along so well. **_

''_**Did you know guys, that we have a name for our group?'' Rachael asked everyone as Kirsty watched on, looking slightly drunk, with pink cheeks, and blurred eyes. I smiled at her, and she smiled back, and it made me happy to see that despite us all being upset about Tasha leaving, Kirsty was okay too. **_

''_**No, go on, tell us.'' Kellan asked, laughing as he asked it. Probably because this was Rachael saying this, and not everyone else, so it was bound to be a joke, coming from the Girl who drank for England. **_

''_**The twilight buds.'' She confirmed, grinning at everyone. Kellan laughed in response, as did Rob and Jackson. I rolled my eyes in response with Rachael, because they thought that we were actually joking, even though we weren't. **_

''_**It's not funny, darling. It's very serious.'' Rachael told them, trying to keep a straight face. But she just ended up laughing after a few seconds, because Kellan kept giving her strange looks, and making her laugh. **_

_**Yep, he looked drunk already, thanks to Rachael's drink spiking, even though he didn't seem to have noticed it at all yet. Which made me surprised, because she had put a hell of vodka a lot in his beer. **_

_**We went outside, whilst me, Rachael, Rob and Kellan had a cigarette, with everyone staying outside with us as we carried on the party, and messing around. ''How's your beer, Kellan?'' Rachael asked him jokingly, grinning at him. **_

''_**Nice, thanks.'' He replied casually, smirking back at her. **_

_**I huffed in response, because he actually really didn't seem to know that Rachael had spiked his drink. ''You know that she spiked it with vodka, right?'' I asked him, because he surely must have been blind from the taste sense if he hadn't noticed by now. **_

''_**Yeah,'' he confirmed casually, shrugging in response. ''I don't care; I'm getting drunk quicker this way.'' **_

_**Rachael laughed in response, whilst I just shook my head. ''That's the way to do it, Darling!'' Rachael replied, winking back at him, after he had winked at her. I sighed heavily, and turned away unimpressed, and shaking my head in response to them two. **_

_**I went back inside after having my cigarette, leaving them to it, as I was getting cold. I went to get another bottle of WKD, and sat on the living room sofa. I was just about to text Nick, when Rob walked into the room. I smiled at him, and quickly put my mobile away. **_

''_**Hello you.'' I said to him, laughing, as I was a tiny, weenie bit drunk. He grinned in response, and sat down next to me on the sofa, putting his arm around the back of the sofa and me too. My heart thumped unevenly in my chest, but I ignored it. **_

''_**Hello twilight bud.'' He replied, nearly making me choke on my WKD. He laughed and patted my back for me, sounding in shock. ''Whoa, you alright there?'' he asked me, still in shock about that. **_

''_**Ur yeah,'' I replied, feeling completely humiliated by the fact that I had almost choked on WKD. ''Just a bit in er…shock about what you called me, just a moment ago.'' I admitted, because it was true. **_

''_**Well; you're my friend, and you're a twilight bud. And you're kinda like my very own twilight bud, so…you're my twilight bud.'' He confirmed, making me laugh. **_

''_**Well okay then….twilight bud.'' I agreed, laughing too. **_

_*******_


	13. Jealousy

When I got up in the morning, I put on a black, and blue, striped dress with black tights as it was quite short and went downstairs to start the clear-up from last night. Usually Tasha would do this, but as my twilight bud wasn't here anymore, I had to do the clear-up.

I had just finished clearing up the kitchen, when my mobile rang. I smiled as I saw that it was Nick calling.

''Hello?'' I answered it.

''Good morning.'' Replied a very happy-sounding Nick. I laughed in response, wondering what he was doing, ringing me so early in the morning, as it was like only nine and everyone was still asleep, which included the twilight cast, lying in the living room.

''Good morning to you too. What do I owe the pleasure of you calling this morning?'' I asked him curiously.

''Well, I wanted to ring you and ask you how you were after last night. I know you were pretty upset about your friend leaving.'' He admitted considerately. I smiled as I thought about how kind that was.

''Thanks, you didn't have to.'' I said, because he really didn't. It was embarrassing to break down in front of the Guy you've just agreed to go on a date with. He probably thought I was a right loser last night, especially Rob too.

''No, but I wanted to.'' He replied, amazing me more.

''Well…I'm fine this morning, thanks for asking.'' I told him, because I did feel okay. However, now I just wanted to go and smash that Adam's face in for cheating on Tasha like how he had done.

''That's good to hear.'' Nick replied, sounding as though he was relieved to hear that I was happy again, bless him.

''So…was there anything else?''

''Oh yeah, right.'' Nick replied, sounding as if he had forgotten to mention something whilst he was talking. ''Well I wanted to ask you if er…well maybe you'd…well like to go on that date we agreed to yesterday.''

That shocked me. I stopped still, watching as Rob walk into the kitchen after he had woken up. He flashed me a smile, and I smiled back before quickly looking away again. ''Urm…okay then, I'd like that.'' I agreed, because I wanted to see Nick.

''Where are you taking me?'' I asked him, hoping that he wouldn't keep it a surprise. I hated surprises.

''That would be telling. You'll just have to wait and see.'' He replied teasingly, making me sigh in response.

''Okay then.'' I forced myself to agree.

Nick laughed in response. ''Well, is it okay if I pick you up just before noon? Just before lunch?'' He asked me.

''Yeah, sure that will be fine.'' I replied, as it would be. Work still wasn't on the cards for at-least two weeks, as they had to sort out mine and Olivia's room.

''Okay cool, so see you soon?''

''You will, bye.'' I put down the phone then, and put it back in my pocket. Rob watched me confused, so I spelled it out for him. ''That was Nick.'' I told him, as I cleaned the kitchen table with a cloth.

His jaw instantly tightened when I mentioned Nick, but I ignored that. ''We're going on a date today.'' I added, wanting to tell him.

''Oh…well…cool.'' Rob replied, making me laugh, even though I knew that he didn't sound too happy about that. But there was nothing that I could do; we were agreeing to be friends, so we would just have to try and stick to that.

''Yeah, it should be really nice. Even though I don't know where we're going yet.'' I admitted honestly, laughing. Rob nodded, getting up from the kitchen table, and not looking at all happy to hear this.

''I'm sure it will.'' He agreed furiously, before walking back into the hallway, and into the living room; ignoring the hurt that had built up on my face in response to how he had just walked off, clearly pissed off with me.

Rachael walked into the kitchen then, after coming downstairs now. ''Wow, I see you've tidied up already.'' She noticed as she took Rob's seat at the kitchen table. I nodded, trying not to cry about how pissed off Rob was.

''Yeah.'' I agreed simply, sweeping the floor to keep me busy before she asked questions about why I was upset.

''You should have left it, me and Kirsty would have helped you.'' She promised me.

''Well there's still the living room to do. When everyone else wakes up.'' I replied, grabbing the dustpan and picking all the rubbish on the floor up and putting it straight into the bin.

''What's wrong?'' Rachael asked me confused, already noticing my fowl mood this morning. I was a bit pissed off actually, because Rob knew that I had a date with Nick this morning, and yet he had still managed to put me in a fowl mood.

I wasn't pissed off with him, but I just wished that he hadn't walked out when he did and he'd talk to me about this.

''Rob?'' She asked when I hadn't said anything, which of course she was right. I sighed, and forced a nod.

''What is it?'' She asked me confused.

''Nothing.''

''Charlie, either you tell me or I ask him. You choose.'' I sighed, and I walked past her and shut the kitchen door, so that nobody else could hear and I took a seat at the kitchen table, sitting next to her.

I bit down on my lower lip, questioning why I was even telling her. Was it going to help? Maybe, so I had to try.

''I got a call from Nick this morning, and we're going on a date today.'' I told her, making her smile in response.

''Yay, I'm so happy!'' She replied, making me grin in response. I took a deep breathe and carried on telling her.

''I told Rob what Nick said on the phone, because he had walked in when I was on the phone, and I had told Rob that we were going on a date today.''

''And?'' she questioned.

''Well its nothing, but Rob was like; '_Oh well cool_' and I said; '_Yeah, it should be really nice_' because I was trying to make conversation with him, and he was like; '_Yeah, I'm sure it will_' and stormed out of the kitchen.''

She raised her eyebrows in response, nodding her head as if she had already guessed what was going on. ''He's jealous.'' She spelled it out for me loud and clear, making me huff at her in response.

Even if that was true, I couldn't do anything about it. We had agreed to be friends, and although that was going to be hard for me, he had to make the effort to. I loved him, and I wanted him around as my friend.

''Well, what can I do to help that? We agreed to be friends last night, what exactly can I do if he decides to be jealous?'' I asked her confused and hurt too, because I didn't have a clue about this kinda stuff.

''Well talk to him…again. And tell him how you feel. Because if you do that, it will only bring you two closer and he'll probably understand more, and be there for you as a friend.'' She told me.

I nodded, knowing that it was true about what she was saying. ''Thanks Rach.'' I smiled at her, thankful for her advice.

''Don't mention it.''

Rob walked back into the room again, with his cigarette packet and lighter in hand, and Rachael got up from the table, smiling at Rob.

''Right, I'm going to grab my cigarette packet upstairs, and get ready for work. Will you be alright now?'' She asked me. I nodded, smiling at her and I watched her as she walked out of the kitchen.

I watched Rob walk out of the garden, and I grabbed my own cigarette packet, and lighter and followed him into the garden, sitting next to him on the sofa, where he had been comforting me last night.

''It's a lovely day.'' I commented, because it was true. The sun was out, and it was already hot, even though it was barely nine in the morning. It was absolutely lovely outside today and it would be so lovely if we were outside whilst we had our date, especially if the weather stayed like this all day.

''It is.'' Rob agreed simply, as he lit up his cigarette. I did the same, trying to think of something, anything to start a conversation up as I looked to the end of our garden. I wanted to hold up what I needed to say for a minute, and have a conversation with him first.

''So, what will you be doing today then?'' I asked him curiously. He shrugged in response, holding his cigarette to his mouth, and inhaling. He kept his eyes away from him, whilst I watched him as he replied.

''I don't know. Probably go home, and sit about for a bit.'' He replied, giving me a bit more information than he had a moment ago. But he still sounded frustrated about having to go, and about Nick too, of course.

''Well…at least you have a day to yourself. To do what you want I mean.'' I added, trying to look on the bright side of the things. If he was ever bored, then he could always stay around here, with us, if he wanted to.

''I guess.'' He forced himself to agree, even though he sounded as though he wasn't really agreeing with me at all.

I sighed heavily in response, and tried to think of something else to talk about. What about the Lost Summer film?

''So, are you all finished with the Lost Summer film now, or so you have to do more work to it, or do any interviews?'' I asked him curiously. I was genially interested though; Lost Summer had caught my attention just as much as the twilight saga had.

''The Lost Summer filming is all finished.'' He replied simply, leaving it as that again. I was about to try and think of something else to say, to make conversation, but he started speaking again.

''As for the interviews, I'm still doing a few to promote the film.'' He added. I nodded, trying to think of more things to make conversation about. This was my hero, and I wanted to make the most of his time, here with me.

''That good, so…do you like doing the interviews or?'' I asked him curiously, because he was so pissed off this morning; I was trying to suggest that this was the reason for him being pissed off, even though we both knew that it really wasn't.

''Yeah, they're okay.'' He replied, before going quiet again.

''Oh.'' I replied, not sure what else I should say to him, to make conversation. So with a heavy sigh, I gave in, and put my cigarette out on the floor, and finally got on with what I had to say to him.

''Rob, I wanted to speak to you.'' I admitted, finally. I looked round, and back to him, to see him nod his head as he put his cigarette out too.

''I know.'' He replied simply, waiting for me to talk again.

''I wanted to talk about this morning…and last night, when…when we agreed to be friends.'' I admitted, because it was true. He didn't say anything for ages, so I carried on speaking, forcing myself to.

''I really want us to be friends, because well…you mean lot to me.'' I admitted, because it was true. ''I'd love to get to know you properly, as friends, and…I still want to date Nick.'' I spelled it out for him.

I stayed silent then, waiting for him to take that in, and accept that. I was determined not to talk yet, so that he had time to take in what I was saying in, what I wanted, and I hoped that he would understand my reasons for it.

I was stuck in the middle here. Part of me; the part that had been hopelessly in love with him for years wanted to rip his clothes off, and…well yeah…do something that I would definitely regret. Just the thought of it made me blush.

But the other part…the other part wanted me to do what everyone else wanted. It wanted Nick, someone normal, and I wanted to finally get over this obsession with him. That was one thing that I definitely wanted.

''I'd like to…to be friends.'' He confirmed, sounding as though he still wasn't too sure about the idea. Truth was neither was I, but I wanted Nick too, and I couldn't have the best of both worlds. I had to make a decision on one of them, and who to be with.

Bu before I went on this date…I had one question to ask Rob. One question that had been getting me confused since the day that I met him, and I wanted to know if he felt it too, or if it was just me all along.

''Rob, I…'' I trailed off, trying to get my words together before I asked this question. ''I wanted to know something.'' I admitted, looking back to him whilst I got myself together before asking what I wanted to.

''Go on.'' He asked me curiously.

I took a deep breathe, and forced myself to carry on, and ask my question that I wanted to ask him. ''Well…when I met you, I was proper happy. Like over the moon happy.'' I admitted because it was true.

He smiled in response, and nodded for me to carry on. ''But there was something else too...I don't know why, but…I felt…'' I tried to word it without feeling stupid about it. ''I felt like…close to you almost.'' I finally said it, even though close wasn't even the right word.

I didn't feel close to him at all, I _wanted_ to be close him. I'd had that same sickly, yearning since the day that I had met him, and there was definitely something there between us, whether he felt it too or not; I felt it. That same, sizzling chemistry that stood between us, and always turned into warmth, into smoldering fire whenever our skin touched.

I supposed that if we were to ever kiss, though we weren't going to; that same feeling would intensify into something huge…I had a feeling that the chemistry would double over, and that small spark would ignite into…well, I don't know.

I hadn't been in a situation where I had these intense feelings for someone and it was all new to me. I could honestly say that I felt so confused about this, my feelings, like I was stuck in the middle a little bit.

''Okay, that's not the right word. I felt…I suppose in a way I did feel closer to you, now that I'd met my hero, kinda thing.'' I paused for a moment, before adding; ''Do you think that makes sense?'' I asked him unsure.

He nodded, grinning at me. ''Perfect sense.'' He reassured me. I grinned in response, glad that it did.

''I'll have to go round your house sometime, have a party.'' I told him, messing around. But he nodded.

''I'd like that.'' He admitted.

''So would I.''

The doorbell rang then, and I knew who it was going to be. I grinned at Rob, and went to go and get the door, knowing that it would be Nick. I pulled open the door eagerly, glad that he had called round at just the right time. Because that chemistry between me and Rob was getting harder to ignore.

He was there when I opened the door, a cheeky grin on his face as he looked up at me. I smiled back, and took what he was wearing, in.

He was wearing a tight-fitted, white shirt, which showed off his perfect, masculine muscles on his chest, and he was wearing a blue NY cap, to hide his perfect curls. He was wearing fitted jeans, and a pair of white converses to match too.

''Hello you, you look lovely today.'' I commented, taking his hand automatically, which he had held out for me to take. He had big, masculine hands, and my small hands looked even more tinier wrapped up in his own.

He sighed heavily in response and led us out of the garden. ''Damn, you're too quick. That was going to be my line.'' He admitted, making me laugh in response. He was so cheeky, but in a good way.

''I suppose I'll have to go with this one…'' He trailed off, before clearing his throat, and getting himself ready for the big line that he was going to give out. I watched him as he did, amused by his good attitude.

''You look absolutely beautiful….but I suppose you already know that you already, as you always look beautiful.'' I blushed bright red then in response to that, before rolling my eyes at him and huffing.

''Oh please; you're just trying to make me feel better now.'' I replied, snickering in response. I wouldn't call myself beautiful at all.

''I'm being serious.'' Nick warned me in a very serious voice…well for him anyway. I giggled, blushing again in response, and quickly changed the subject.

''So…where are you taking me then?'' I asked him, as he didn't have any clues on him as to where we were going, and we were still walking down the road together, hand in hand. Was there even a car to go in, or were we walking there?

''You'll just have to find out. It's a surprise, remember.'' He reminded me, making me sigh in response.

''Okay,'' I agreed easily, making him laugh. He walked over to a car, and pressed a button on the car key, and opening the car. I looked round in shock, before I couldn't help it. I actually screamed when I saw the car.

I blushed red and quickly looked away, embarrassed. Nick laughed, a little confused. 'You like my car?'' He asked me playfully.

''Urm…you haven't seen twilight at all, have you?'' I asked him, struggling not to laugh as I said it.

He shook his head. ''Okay well…as embarrassing as this is…that's Edward's Volvo. And yes, I pretty much love the car.'' I admitted, blushing red again. Nick laughed happily in response to that.

It was a cool car, but in a different colour black, but it was definitely the exact same sports car version of Edward's one. Nick opened the passenger door for me, and I smiled and got in, still curious to know where we were going, as we drove away.

***


	14. Beach

**I turned to Nick and raised my eyebrows in response, as he drove more and more closer to the beach in LA. He just chuckled in response, and carried on driving quietly. I looked back out of the car window, which was open, and let the wind gently blow away my hair. **

''**Do you want to put some music on? There's a few CD's in there.'' Nick told me, pointing to the dashboard in front of me. **

**I nodded, smiling. ''Ur…okay.'' I agreed, curious as to know what he listened to. I opened the dashboard drawers and pulled out the few CD's that he had. **

**The first CD that I got out was a **_**Debussy**_** Album, **_**Claire De Lune**_**, which really impressed me. I was the biggest fan of Debussy, and it was good to see that we had something in common with each other. He had a **_**Yiruma**_** album too, and **_**The Beatles Revolver **_**album. **

**And I was very impressed to see the latest **_**Paramore**_** album. I absolutely loved Paramore too. We had a lot in common with music, it seemed. **

'**Wow…I love the albums you've got in here.'' I admitted, because it was true. He smiled in response, just as happy as me about having something in common with each other. **

''**Put whatever CD that you want on. I don't mind, you can choose.'' He promised me. I looked back at the CD's, wondering what I should put on. I liked Paramore, but they're music wasn't exactly…quiet or peaceful before a date. **

**So for that fact, I put the Debussy CD on, listening to Claire De Lune when it came on, and getting the attention of Nick again. ''Good choice.'' He grinned at me in response to the CD that I had chosen to put on. **

**I laughed in response. ''Well, I was going to go with the Paramore CD but then I realized that the Debussy CD is calmer.'' I told him. **

''**Hey, don't mind me. I think its an awesome CD.'' He admitted, not at all embarrassed by admitting that fact. It was good to be like that, if you could. Especially when you were such a happy person like how Nick was. **

**It went silent then, and I kept my eyes on the car window, as Nick drove. He smiled at me shyly as he pulled up on this quiet, empty beach. It looked really gorgeous; the sun out, with crystal clear sand. **

**I walked hand in hand with Nick to the beach, and helped him put the blanket on the beach. He put a basket down on the blanket, which he had retrieved from his boot, and got a glass of champagne out. **

''**It's supposed to be a really nice wine. I haven't tried it myself, but I wanted to make the effort as much as I can on our first date.'' He admitted, shrugging, making me laugh. I could tell that he was nervous and I got proof of that when he couldn't undo the champagne bottle, because his hands were shaking so much. **

''**Nick, chill out! You're shaking like hell!'' I said in shock. I mean I was nervous too, but I was learning to deal with it. Nick seemed like a really nice Guy, and I could safely say that I trusted him already. **

**My hands instantly reached out and rested over Nick's shaking hands and they automatically stopped shaking. ''God…how bloody embarrassing.'' Nick sighed heavily, making me laugh in response. **

''**Just relax Nick. I'm having a good time, and you are too, right?'' I checked to make sure. He nodded. **

''**Yeah, I'm just…nervous.'' He admitted sheepishly. **

''**Well don't be, I'm really enjoying myself, I promise. You have nothing to be nervous about.'' I added, promising him. **

**I hesitated, before slowly leaning in, and kissing his cheek quickly; feeling the soft skin below my lips, before quickly pulling away again. I smiled at him, and he grinned back; delightfully happy now, as he went back to opening the champagne bottle. **

**He poured me a glass, and then himself, even though he had admitted that he was only drinking champagne to impress me, which made me laugh. He had brought everything in his little picnic basket; including strawberries, some sandwiches, and my favourite; peanut butter cups. **

''**Oh my god, how did you know? I absolutely love Peanut butter cups!'' I admitted, because it was true. **

''**A good guess, I suppose.'' Nick replied shrugging, sounding as though he was in shock to hear that we had that in common too. ''Peanut butter cups are my favourite too.'' He admitted honestly. **

**We sat eating the strawberries then, which were also my absolute favourite, when he started asking different things. ''So I was wondering…can I ask you some questions? Just…curiosity I guess.'' Nick admitted, a little embarrassed. **

''**Ur yeah sure, go for it.'' I replied, making him grin. **

''**Okay then.'' He agreed, eating another strawberry, and concentrating as he thought of a question for me. ''Has anybody had a major impact on you, excluding Rob Pattinson?'' He asked me, watching me in wonder. **

**I gave that some thought, trying to think of all the people that I looked up to, and were my heroes. ''Excluding Rob…I'd probably say…John Lennon, and…Martin Luther King.'' I admitted, nodding my head. **

''**Why them two? What are you're reasons?'' He asked me curiously, sounding as though he was genially interested in my answer. **

''**Well…I believe that they changed the world. In my opinion. John Lennon is my absolute hero, because he's a great singer, he got famous when everyone else didn't think that he could…and most importantly; he used his lyrics to try and make the best of the world, to make a change. I like that.'' I admitted, because it was true. **

**I looked to Nick, expecting to see him laugh or whatever, but he didn't. He just smiled, pleased with my response. ''And er…Martin Luther King?'' He asked me, just as curiously as he had before. **

''**Mostly for the same reasons, apart from that he wasn't a singer. He used that infamous speech to try and change the world, to make a difference. And then despite all the change he was trying to make, he was still assassinated.'' I sighed. **

''**And the people that have made an impact on you?'' I asked Nick curiously, because I was very curious to know. **

''**Easy. Michael Jackson.'' Nick replied, grinning. **

''**Aww, I adore Michael's music. So why is he an influence on you?'' I asked him. **

''**Through dancing.'' He admitted, making me blush. Ah, of course; that one should have been totally obvious. ''He's the king of Pop, and I believe in some way that he changed the world.'' Nick added. **

**I nodded my head, because it was true. Through Michael's classic dancing skills, and amazing voice; he had changed the world. **

''**I mean…like The Beatles, he was way ahead of his time, through his dancing, through his music. He's a big influence on major people in the business, and I think that he changed the music industry for the better.'' **

''**I agree; he was such an amazing dancer.''**

''**Especially when he did his moon-walking.'' Nick agreed with me. **

''**So…anyone else?'' I asked him curiously, because he had only mentioned Michael Jackson so far. **

''**Yeah. Definitely James Dean.'' Nick admitted. **

**I smiled. ''Through dancing?'' I asked him, knowing the answer this time. He laughed in response, and nodded. **

''**Yeah; people like them have a real effect on my dancing. I'd love to dance as good as Michael Jackson.'' He admitted, biting down on his lower lip as he thought about it. I smiled in response, liking the fact that he got caught up in his dancing, like how he just had. **

''**So…any more questions to ask?'' I asked him curiously. I liked these type of questions; they were an interesting way to get to know somebody. **

''**Any books that have had an impact on you?'' Nick asked me curiously before taking a bite out of the peanut butter sandwich that he had got out. I smiled in response, blushing bright red at the first thought that I had. **

''**Definitely the twilight saga.'' I told him, because it was true. ''Because…well, I think it influenced me a lot. I write books you see, and it definitely influenced my writing.'' I admitted, because it was true. **

''**Wow…what books are you writing about?'' He asked me curiously, sounding just as curious as before. **

**I told him about this one book that I had written back in England, called **_**Tainted Soul**_**, which was like **_**Twilight**_**. It was about a Girl called Katie Sutherland, and how she moved back to live with her Dad, after her Foster Mum moves to live with her Boyfriend. **

**Katie's Mum had died in a 'car accident' with Katie's two other Sisters, with Katie in the car, but when she moves back with her Dad, she finds out that the accident wasn't so innocent as it seemed. **

**And she meets two people, Brother and Sister, who seem weird; Damian and Viola Malin, and when they're family moves into town, she has to try and stay away from Damian after she finds out that he's a Vampire, even though she's falling in love with him, despite how it seems that his family has something to do with her Mother's death.**

''**Wow…wow, and er…wow.'' I laughed as Nick said that; relieved that he liked the sound of it. ''That sounds like a really good book. And I'm not just saying that; promise.'' He told me, grinning. **

''**Well erm…thanks for that.'' I replied, smiling back. ''So any books that had influenced you?'' I asked him curiously. **

''**I've read loads of books actually, but I wouldn't say that they've had much of an influence on me.'' He admitted. ''But I do have another question.'' He added, grinning at me. I laughed in response. **

''**Go on.'' I asked. **

''**What is the most annoying thing someone could do on a first date?'' He asked me, making me laugh in response. **

''**Nice try, but I'm not telling.'' I told him, winking at him. **

**He laughed too, sounding a little frustrated by that. ''Oh please…I mean…it would be good to know for next time.'' He told me, winking back at me. **

**I giggled, exasperated and happy to think that there would actually be a **_**next**_** time. ''Oh, so there will be a next time, will there?'' I asked him. **

''**Well…'' he trailed off, thinking for a moment. ''I'd like to think so.'' I added, grinning cheekily at me. **

**I blushed bright red, and quickly looked away from him again. ''So anyway…tell me please.'' He asked, after I had gone off track. **

''**Okay,'' I sighed, trying to think of something to say, anything. ''Well, I haven't been on much dates before, so I'd probably say…'' I trailed off, still thinking. ''Probably, if someone kept talking a lot, and…I don't know…wouldn't let me speak or something.'' I said, shrugging. ''Because I am usually quite a quiet person, so…I'd probably find that really annoying.'' I admitted. **

**He grinned in response. ''Mine would have to be…someone who…kept getting their phone out, and making it obvious that they were completely not interested in what I was saying. I find that really frustrating, because if I was boring you…I'd prefer you to just tell me. I kinda talk a lot when I'm nervous.'' He admitted, laughing shyly at himself. **

''**I talk a lot when I'm really nervous, and I wouldn't worry. You're are probably…the least boring person that I have ever admitted.'' I promised him, taking his hand and squeezing it in encouragement. **

**He grinned at me in response, taking my hand up to his face, and kissing it softly. I giggled in response, blushing bright red. ''I'm glad you're enjoying yourself.'' He admitted, winking at me as he put my hand back down. **

''**Because I am too.'' He confirmed. **

''**So any more questions that you have up your sleeve?'' I asked him curiously, giggling as I asked him that. **

''**Definitely,'' Seth agreed, still grinning. I giggled again and took out a peanut butter sandwich, feeling a little hungry now. **

''**Well…what was the craziest thing you did as a kid, and why did you do it?'' Nick asked me, getting my attention. I was always crazy as a Kid, so this should be an easy, laugh a minute. And he'd probably laugh. **

''**I'd probably have to say…getting kicked out of school for two weeks, because we kinda…er…blew the biology room up.'' As soon as I had said that, Nick was bursting out with laughter. **

''**No way!'' He exclaimed, still laughing. I nodded, laughing with him, because it had been quite funny. **

''**We didn't mean to do it, but we were all making this thing that we had to do, I forgot what it was now, but we ended up blowing the classroom up.'' I admitted, still giggling as I remembered it. **

**He laughed again. ''That is hilarious.'' He confirmed, laughing once more again. ''Okay mine is…stupid really, but…well, I have two Brothers and two Sisters, all older than me, besides my little Brother, Thomas.'' He explained. **

**I nodded, for him to carry on. ''Well I was eight, and my Brother was six. And he was always getting more things for the youngest, getting more attention, being younger than me. And I remember being jealous because my Parents got him a brand new bike, and it was a lot nicer than my old bike, so I messed about with it, so that he couldn't use it. But he got onto the bike and rid off, while I tried to catch him and warn him…and he fell off, and had to go to hospital. I felt so bad after that.'' He admitted sheepishly. **

**I laughed in shock. ''God, I cant believe that from you. You seem so…sweet.'' I told him, laughing. **

''**Oh, so…you think I'm sweet, do you?'' He asked me playfully. I laughed in response, blushing bright red as he gazed at me. **

''**I'm wondering now.'' I admitted, giggling again. **

''**Well…I'm sweet when it comes to you.'' He admitted, flirting with me, and making me blush an even brighter red in response. **

''**Changing subject…any more questions?'' I asked him, hoping that there was, because I was still blushing red. **

''**Ur yeah…is there anything that you cant say no to?'' he asked me, still gazing at me as I thought about that one. My face was getting hotter and hotter as the minutes went by, and I tried to ignore the way that he was looking at me, even though it was very hard. **

''**Well…that all depends.'' I replied, trying so hard to ignore the way that he was looking at me. Or should I say, gazing?**

''**On what?'' he asked me, sitting forward, so that he was sat even closer to me. I looked up in shock, catching his dark eyes staring at me closely, right close to my face. **

''**Well…'' I trailed off, unsure what to say. ''On…whether the timing is right…or what it is that I would be saying no to…umm.''**

**He smiled at me sheepishly. ''There's definitely something that I can't say no to.'' He admitted, leaning in closer. I watched him, hoping that he was about to do what I thought he was about to do. **

**But his mobile started to ring then, and with a heavy sigh, he pulled back, and got his mobile out of his jean pocket. He frowned in response to the I.D name, and looked back up to me. ''Sorry, I have to take this. It's important.''**

''**Go ahead.'' I promised him, smiling. He smiled back, and got up from the blanket that we were sat on, and walked over to take the call, whilst I eat another one of the peanut butter sandwiches. They were really nice. **

**I watched him as he got himself stressed over the phone call, and I had to wonder who he was talking to. For once, he didn't look calm; he looked really stressed out, and I watched him as the phone call carried on. **

**It was unusual to see Nick looking so…angry, and I wondered if I should ask about it when he came back…out of curiosity. **

**It was about five minutes later when he put his phone back into his pocket, and I looked to see him trying to calm down for a minute before he forced himself to walk back over. I smiled at him as he did, even though he looked really pissed. **

**I wondered if I should ask about it when he walked over here, but then I also wondered if that would be too nosy too. I was only going to ask because I was worried about him, but would he actually appreciate that?**

**He sat back down on the blanket, and I decided to just go for it, and ask him about it, and if he didn't want to tell me, then he'd tell me to get lost, wouldn't he?**

''**Problems?'' I asked him curiously. **

**He nodded his head, taking another slice of the peanut butter sandwiches, before he went quiet again as he started to eat the sandwich. **

''**Do you want to talk about it, or?'' I asked him, giving him the chance to tell me no, if he actually really wanted to. **

**He sighed again, after he ate the sandwich, and nodded. ''It's nothing…family problems.'' He half-answered me, sighing again. ''But I need to go now. I'm sorry.'' He apologized, even though we had actually spent hours together. **

**I shook my head. ''That's okay. Do what you have to do.'' I promised him, smiling in encouragement. **

''**I'm really sorry. I wanted to spend the whole of the day with you.'' He admitted annoyed, as he packed up the lunch. I helped him pack the blanket away too. **

''**It's fine, honestly. We'll just have to spend more time together on a our second date.'' I admitted, giggling. **

**He smiled, but it wasn't the same, happy smile that came from him. I could tell that he really wasn't happy about this, at all. **

*******


	15. Twilight Buds

It was far too quiet on the car as Nick drove me home. He hadn't said a word to me for ten minutes now, and the silence was the awkward-kinda silence that you got on a first date. But I couldn't stand it.

I didn't know what to say to him though, because he looked really pissed off still as he drove me back home, and I could tell that whoever he was talking to on the phone had really annoyed him, bad.

I tried to think of something to say, anything, just to try and make him feel better, and take his mind off of it, but I couldn't think of anything to say. We had talked beforehand a lot, so now I was struggling to think.

He pulled the car outside the house, and turned to smile apologetically at me. I smiled back, hoping that he was okay. He still looked really upset about it though, and I wondered if he was off now.

''Are you okay?'' I asked him worriedly. He nodded, sighing heavily as he rested his head in his hands.

''Yeah, sorry I wasn't talking on the way back.'' He apologized again. I smiled at him in reassurance, telling him that it was fine.

''It's okay; you had stuff to think about, and I had a good time.'' I promised him, because it was true.

He smiled, a little happier. ''I'm glad.'' He replied, still looking a bit upset though. He got out of the car though then, and walked over to my side. I pulled open the car door, and took his hand, which he held out for me.

He shut the door behind us for me, and we walked hand in hand to the door, slowly, because it seemed that we both didn't want to leave each other yet.

''Is your er…family problems that bad then?'' I asked him, unsure of how I should ask him about it. I wanted him to feel like he could tell me, because not only did I want to know, I wanted to be there for him, if he chose for me to be.

''Just normal.'' He replied, frowning unhappily. God, I had never seen Nick so unhappy before. It was sad to see, because he was such a usual, happy person.

''Oh,'' I replied, not sure what else I should say in response to that. He was so upset about whatever was bothering him so much. ''Well I hope everything works out.'' I told him, feeling as upset as him about whatever it was upsetting him.

''Thanks.'' He replied, sighing heavily as we reached the outside of our house. He walked me to the door, and I smiled up at him shyly, hoping that now he would make some kind of move. Even if it was just a small kiss…I wanted him to.

He smiled at me shyly, as he moved closer to me a little. ''Well…I'll text you tonight.'' He promised me.

I nodded. ''Okay,'' I agreed, stepping even closer to him. He smiled, and started to lean in closer, before he quickly pulled away again.

''I'll see you soon.'' He promised me, before quickly rushing out of the garden, and rushing off in his car. I watched him leave, feeling upset about how he had left things. I really had thought that he was going to kiss me, but he didn't.

I sighed heavily and walked into the house, to hear absolute nothing, no noise at all. I walked into the house, to find nobody, and walked out into the back garden, to see Rob sat on the outdoor sofa having a cigarette.

He smiled at me as I walked outside, looking a little surprised that I was home. I could tell that he had gone home to change because he had changed his clothes since this morning. He was wearing a white vest with a lime green shirt on top, which was undone, and matched his green-grey, sparkling eyes.

He had on dark jeans, and his usual, white converses which he usually wore for photo shoots and stuff, and I couldn't help but notice how cute he looked today. Definitely more than cute; sexy was more of the right word.

His short hair was its usual messy-self, where he had been running his hands all through it, and it was unusual not to see it spiked up, like how it usually was.

''Where's everyone else?'' I asked him confused. It wasn't normally this quiet in the house, and it felt weird with no noise coming from the house at all.

''Kellan and Jackson went back home to get changed, and Rachael and Kirsty are at work.'' He told me, inhaling his cigarette.

I nodded, and walked back into the kitchen to grab my own cigarette packet and lighter. The hilarious thing was my Mum hadn't even known that I smoked until I was eighteen; two years after I started.

''So, its just you and me then.'' I replied, walking into the garden again, and taking a seat next to him, on the outdoor sofa. I lit up my cigarette, and took a long inhale, because I was a bit stressed after how things had turned out with Nick.

''Yep,'' Rob agreed, taking another long inhale of his cigarette as I sat back on the garden sofa. ''So how did your date with Nick go then?'' Rob asked me curiously. I decided to tell him, just to see what he would say.

''It went okay really, but he had to go early.'' I admitted, taking another long inhale of my cigarette, feeling calmer already. ''He had family problems, and he got a call about it.'' I added, telling him.

Rob nodded, putting his cigarette out then. ''Oh,'' he replied. ''So…are you seeing him again? I mean if it went well, then…'' he trailed off, adding the last bit quickly, because of how awkward it could be between us.

''I think so. He said that he was going to text me tonight.'' I admitted. He nodded his response, looking as though he didn't want to talk about Nick anymore. So I quickly thought of a subject change.

''So…they actually left you here on your own?'' I asked him in shock. I hadn't thought that they actually would.

''Well I left with everyone else to go and get changed, but Rachael knew that I wanted to come back here, so she gave me the spare key.'' He admitted, showing me the spare key that Rachael had given him, and flashing me a cheeky smile.

I laughed in response. ''So…why did you want to come back here so early?'' I asked him curiously, feeling a bit confused. I mean, he had that nice, big house of his to live in, but he had decided to come back here, to our small house.

Well, small compared to how big their house was.

''I like it here. It's nicer than our house, even if it is smaller. I like it being smaller, it's more…homely.'' He admitted, making me smile. I should have expected something so…nice from him.

''Yeah, we got lucky when we brought this house.'' I agreed with him. ''Are you staying for the rest of the night?'' I asked him, hoping that the answer would be yes.

''Ur yeah, I think so. Rachael's organizing another party, but I wanted to make sure that it was okay with you first.'' He admitted.

''Of course; you wouldn't have to ask me for permission, even if I was going to bed early.'' I assured him, laughing.

He grinned at me, happy now.

''Well, I got a beer if that's alright with you. Rachael said I could help myself.'' He admitted, making me huff.

''No, it's not alright. I demand you to put it back.'' I told him, trying to keep a straight face. He looked at me in shock, making me laugh. ''I'm joking, yikes. What did I say a moment ago? About not asking for permission? Its fine.'' I told him, sighing.

''Okay.'' He agreed, laughing too.

***

I got myself a bottle of red WKD from the kitchen, and walked back into the living room where Rob was sat on the sofa, listening to the music that I had put on, on the stereo. The song playing now was a new song by Katy Perry, and it was a bit like _I kissed a Girl_, with a club dance vibe to it.

I handed Rob another beer, and walked back to the kitchen to get the bowl so that I could make a punch. It was almost five already, and everyone else was bound to be here soon, so I thought that it was a good time to start getting drunk.

Yikes, I was sounding more and more like Rachael. Drinking at five in the evening wasn't at all like me. It was something you would more expect from Rachael, and not me. God, I even surprised myself.

I walked back into the living room, with a bottle of apple sours, a bottle of Smirnoff vodka, a bottle of Jacques cider, and a bottle of red WKD, with my bowl to bring in. Rob raised his eyebrows in response to everything that I had in hand, but I just grinned in response.

''It's five already, and the others will probably be here soon, right?'' I asked him, though I had a feeling that they would be. Rachael was due to be home at five or six anyway, and Kirsty was sure to be home in the next ten minutes.

''Ur yeah, the Guys just text me actually to say that they're on their way round. They're just popping to the shops quickly to buy some alcohol.'' He said that and rolled his eyes then, making me laugh in response.

''That's alright; it just means that we have more alcohol to drink.'' I shrugged, making him laugh this time in response. I tipped the drinks into the bowl that I had brought with me, just as I heard the front door open and close.

''I wonder who that could be.'' I said, grinning at Rob as I poured myself a glass of the punch that I had made up, which had turned a lovely, pulsing purple colour. I tasted it, and fought the urge to moan.

It tasted so good, and better that any punch that I had ever made, or tasted in fact. I was proud of myself.

''I don't know.'' Rob replied, watching the doorway just as Kirsty walked in the living room. She smiled at me and Rob, after seeing that he was here. She was wearing her nursery top on, and she looked a little tired.

''Hiya guys.'' She said, before her eyes looked to the middle of the room, and took in the punch that I had made. ''You made a punch already?'' She asked me in shock. I nodded, grinning at Rob, after he smiled at me.

''Uh huh, and you two should taste some. It's really nice, better than any punch that I've ever tasted before.'' I commented proudly. Kirsty nodded, putting her bag down on the spare armchair and walking into the middle of the room.

''I will after I go and get changed.'' She replied, grabbing a bottle of WKD. ''I'll take this with me to drink, after I wash my hair.'' She added, grinning at me. I grinned back, tipping the remainder of my punch back down my throat.

''So, how did your date go?'' Kirsty asked me curiously, before she walked out of the door. I smiled at her, which was harder than I thought as I thought over today, and what had happened on my date.

''It was okay, but he had to rush off, because he got a call to do with family problems or something.'' I admitted, sighing. I would have been quite happy to stay with Nick all day, if I'd had the chance.

''Oh, are you seeing him again?'' Kirsty asked me.

''Maybe. He's texting me tonight.'' I told her, smiling as I poured myself another glass of my punch. She let the room to go and get dressed then, and I looked up at Rob, who was still sat, drinking his beer.

''Well, are you not having any punch then?'' I asked him offended. I had made the effort to make a lovely, sweet-tasting punch, and it tasted amazing, and he was sitting there, drinking his beer, and totally ignoring my specially made punch. How rude.

''In a minute, maybe.'' He replied, shrugging as he drank some more of his beer. I huffed, annoyed that he could actually turn down my awesome punch.

''How could you turn down my punch after I had took my time to make it especially for us?'' I demanded, before grinning at him. He rolled his eyes in response, and got up; getting himself a glass, after he had out his beer bottle down.

''Okay, okay, I'm having some.'' He told me, sighing heavily in response.

''Good Boy.'' I replied, making him laugh. ''God, I'm sounding more and more like Rachael by the second!'' I complained because it was true.

He laughed again, drinking some of the punch as I turned the music up a little louder. ''The neighbours can fuck off, if they have any complaints. He shouldn't cheat on my friend, should he?'' I demanded angrily.

I tipped the shot back down, and got myself some more of the punch, just as I heard the door go again. ''Oh, I think we've got more visitors.'' I giggled.

Rob grinned at me, and watched the living room door, like me, watching to see who had come back now. Rachael's head popped around the living room door a moment later, and she smiled at both of us.

She laughed in response at seeing what we were up to already, and at this time in the day too. It was a proud laughter, something that I could safely say that I expected from her. That's what Rachael was like.

''I see that you two are in party mood already then.'' She commented, still amused by the sight of us drinking the punch together.

''Yep, Rob's helping me finish up the punch, so you better hurry up if you're going upstairs to get ready first, otherwise it will be all gone.'' I warned her. ''And I made it, so it does taste really yummy.'' I added, making her laugh again.

''Well, I better go and quickly get changed then. I'll be back in a minute.'' She added, grinning at me. ''Oh, before I forget, how did your date go?'' She asked me curiously. Ugh, I was getting fed-up of that question.

I rolled my eyes in response. ''It was okay, but he had to go after getting a call. Something to do with family problems.'' I told her.

''Well, where did he take you?'' She asked me.

''The Beach…it was nice actually; we had a picnic and a bite to eat, but…then he had to go.'' I told her.

She nodded. ''Well I'm going to go and get changed quickly, before Rob has all the alcohol.'' She joked, grinning at Rob before she quickly ran up the stairs. And she complained about being unfit; huh, that was a joke. She could manage it when alcohol was on offer.

''So twilight bud, how drunk are you getting tonight?'' Rob asked me jokingly. He sighed happily as he sat down on the sofa, with yet another glass of my punch in his hand. I laughed, and sat down next to him.

I sat, facing him, with my knees tucked under me. ''Slaughtered, if Rachael has her way.'' I joked, grinning at him. ''How about you…_twilight bud_?'' I joked, sitting forward on my knees. He laughed happily in response, and shrugged.

''I don't know…we'll see when the others get themselves around here.'' He replied, shrugging again. He sipped his glass of punch as he grinned back at me. I smiled back, drinking a bit of my punch too.

''Rob…can I ask you something?'' I asked him curiously, because I kinda wanted to know, even though it was probably all the alcohol talking now. He nodded though, shrugging again, and watching me closely.

''Yeah sure, go ahead.'' He assured me. I smiled, and decided to just ask him, after all; we were friends now, so it was okay to ask.

''That night that I met you…I went to kiss you. It was stupid, and I have to laugh about it now.'' I admitted, laughing awkwardly. ''But you pulled away, and ran for it. It doesn't matter, but…I just wondered if that had been because I scared you off?'' I asked him, because I had actually convinced myself that it was because of that.

''It was the complete opposite reason. I was in shock more-so, but…you kinda reminded me of Katie, because she had been a fan too.'' He admitted.

''Oh…I was just wondering. Because you looked absolutely mortified, and I have to admit that I felt like a fucking idiot.'' I admitted, because it was true. ''But I was just curious, now that we're friends and all.'' I admitted, because it was true.

Rob smiled in response. ''Don't be embarrassed about it; you can ask me whatever you want.'' He reassured me, making me feel a little better.

''Thanks.'' I smiled.

He shrugged. ''No problem.'' He promised me, before getting up, and pouring himself some more of the punch. I decided to go and get changed now too, ready for tonight. I got up, and smiled at Rob.

''I'm just going to go and get changed, okay?'' I asked him. He nodded, and I walked out of the door carefully, and up the stairs. I went into my room, and locked the door, and got in my shower, washing my hair.

I put on a grey and pink dress, which looked pretty. It was grey at the top, and pink at the bottom, and had a pretty bow around the middle of the dress, cutting the colours off away from each other, and I put on some pretty, pink high heels to go with it.

I blow-dried my hair and I straightened my hair, curling a few strands in my hair, to make it look even better.

I went downstairs, and walked into the living room, where everyone already was, including Kellan and Jackson too. Kellan smiled at me as I walked into the living room, and I grinned at Rob, after he looked up at me.

''You look well nice, Charlie.'' Rachael told me, making me smile.

''Thanks Rach.'' I replied. I walked into the middle of the room, and looked at the new punch that someone had made. ''So…any chance that I could get a glass of this punch?'' I asked, looking around for any sign of a free glass for me.

''Of course, here you go darling.'' Rachael replied, handing me a glass with a some punch in, after she poured me some punch. I downed it in one, and got myself some more, making Rachael giggle.

''That's more like it, darling.'' She giggled after sitting herself on Jackson's lap. I grinned at her in response, and took a seat next to Rob on the floor. He had a glass of the punch too, which made me smile.

''Liking the punch more than mine?'' I asked him curiously, watching him closely as he drank a bit of his punch, and turned to grin at me. My god, his eyes looked fucked up already, telling me that he was drunk…that might be an advantage though.

Only kidding, honestly. I mean I was drunk too, so it wasn't my fault, if sex god was catching my eye. It was his for er…I don't know. I was just a little too drunk to think of something at the minute.

''Well don't tell her, but I prefer you're on better.'' He admitted in a whisper, in-case Rachael overheard. We laughed together because of that, both just a little bit drunk, that much was obvious.

''Well that's it Rob, you will not be having any more of my punch from now on. It means there's more for us, as Charlie's punch is better and all.'' Rachael warned him sourly, shooting him an angry glare.

''What I meant was…Charlie put more alcohol in hers, so I think that's probably why.'' Rob lied, making me grin. The truth was, I had a feeling that Rachael put a lot more alcohol in this punch than I had, if the taste was anything to go by.

''Oh, well that's okay then, darling.'' Rachael grinned at Rob, before going back to drinking her drink, after shrugging her shoulders in response. I laughed again with Rob, and continued drinking the punch.

''God, this punch is a bit strong though.'' I admitted, grimacing in response. Rob laughed, and nodded his head in agreement.

''I know, I think that Rachael did it on purpose, so that we all got drunk.'' He admitted, making me laugh. Well, that definitely sounded like Rachael.

''Well…its probably true; knowing Rachael.'' I agreed, making me and Rob both laugh again in response. I could feel the alcohol in me, going straight to my head, and doing funny things. It was really warm in this living room now though, even though I was just wearing this dress, with high heels.

''Is it me, or is it really warm in here?'' I asked Rob confused. I didn't think that it was just me, because his cheeks had a warm, pink glow to them, which looked simple adorable on him. He turned and smiled at me.

''I think it's the alcohol, but I do feel really warm too actually.'' He admitted honestly, smiling at me. ''Do you want to go outside, and have a cigarette?'' He asked me, drinking the rest of his punch.

''Yeah, okay then.'' I agreed, drinking up the rest of my punch. ''Why not?'' I added, making us both laugh again as I got myself up at the same time that he did.

I followed Rob over to the living room table, and got myself a whole glass of punch again, and Rachael watched us; raising her eyebrows in response. I rolled my eyes at her, because she was watching me as though we were doing something naughty or something.

''Honestly Rachael, we're going for a cigarette, that's all.'' I admitted. She frowned at me, unhappy now.

''Thanks for the invite, darling.'' She replied, huffing as she drank some more of her punch. I rolled my eyes in response.

''Well you know that I would Rachael, but…well I want Rob all to myself.'' I joked, just messing about. Rob must have known that I messing about too, because he took my hand which was outstretched for him to take.

I giggled in response as he pulled me through to the hallway, grinning at me as we walked outside. He let go of my hand straight away, and took a seat on the outdoor sofa, while I carried on laughing.

''Oh god, how funny.'' I commented, trying not to laugh so hard, because it was actually hurting my stomach. He laughed again, as he lit up his cigarette, and continued to watch me whilst I danced drunkenly on our stone flooring.

I looked up, and back to him, and as soon as we were looking at each other; we both laughed, and looked away from each other again. I drank some more of my punch, feeling so badly drunk now, as I kept drinking.

''You're so funny Charlie, honestly.'' Rob complained, sighing, before laughing at me again, as he continued to smoke his cigarette, and drink some more of his punch too. I laughed too, happy about him saying that.

''Well I'm glad that _you _think so.'' I replied, before spinning around drunkenly on the spot. Rob laughed again in response, but I couldn't see him, because I was getting so dizzy now. I laughed too, before stopping to catch my breathe.

I leaned against the wall, finding Rob's face as the rest of the world spun around me, and laughed along with him. ''God…air outside is…so not good for the drunk.'' I admitted, slightly breathless from spinning round and round.

''Well, you were the one that wanted to come outside.'' Rob reminded me, laughing again. I nodded, agreeing with him, and laughed again. God, I needed to stop laughing. I had laughed so much tonight, that it actually hurt my stomach.

''Stop making me laugh, it hurts!'' I complained after the dizzying died down, and I lit up my cigarette. He laughed again though, which only made me laugh with him too. He was such a laugh when he was drunk, same as me, I guess.

I say that, because I talked more when I was drunk. I just let myself go, and danced, and had a laugh. When I was sober, I constantly panicked about what I should say, and what it would sound like when I said things.

''You're making me laugh!'' Rob complained, before sighing happily. I looked over at him curiously, to see him looking up at the sky; his head resting on the top of the sofa, and leaning out above the sofa cover to see the sky.

I laughed again, which instantly set him off. ''What are you looking at?'' I asked him confused, walking over and taking a seat next to him on the sofa. He laughed again, and turned his head to look at me.

''Don't you think that the sky is really beautiful when its night-time, with all the stars out in the sky?'' He asked me curiously, making me laugh again. I was starting to think that he had been taking more than alcohol, and that maybe he was actually on something.

I mean…that was a really random thing to say. I would never ask something like that, and in my drunk state; it sounded even funnier to me. Especially with Rob saying it, as he had been making me laugh all day.

''Okay Rob, I'm getting a bit worried about you now.'' I admitted, making him grin in response. My phone buzzed in my pocket, and with a heavy sigh, I pulled my mobile out and read the text that I had got. I opened the message up, after seeing that it was from Nick, wanting to read what he had to say.

**Hiya, it's Nick. Hope today was okay, and I'm sorry for rushing off, like how I had to. **

**I'll ring you again tomorrow morning, but I was wondering if you wanted to meet up again in the next couple of days?**

**Nick. **

''Aww, bless.'' I commented, happy that he had text me. I giggled, because the drink was also getting to me more and more. Rob noticed my mood, and rested his head closer to mine, looking at me curiously.

''Who's that from?'' Rob asked me curiously.

''Uh…Nick.'' I replied.

''Oh,'' he replied, totally unbothered now. He turned his head away, and took another long inhale of his cigarette. ''Are we getting some more drink then, twilight bud?'' He asked me, turning his head to grin at me again.

I rolled my eyes in response. ''Wait a sec, I've just got to reply to Nick.''

''Okay.'' Rob sighed heavily, taking another long inhale of his cigarette again. I grinned at him in response, before I pressed open, and started to reply, before I read it back to myself, to make sure that it was okay.

**Okay then, and it's fine, I promise. **

**I'll look forward to talking to you, speak soon. **

**Charlie. **

''Come on then you, lets go and get some more drink.'' I said to Rob, sighing heavily as a joke, as I put my cigarette out on the floor. He laughed in response, and put his own cigarette out. He got up from the sofa too, like how I had.

''Yes! I thought you'd never ask.'' He joked drunkenly. I laughed again in response, and stumbled into the kitchen, and through the house, with Rob following me, as we went to get some more of the punch.

***


	16. Friends or more?

**Kiss**

We sat in the living room, with the lamp in the middle of the floor, and the chocolates sat there too, for all of us to eat. We were all sat in a circle, getting ready for the scary story that Kellan was about to tell us.

Kellan was sat opposite me, and I couldn't look away. I found scary stories to be…exactly that. Very scary, so it was safe to say that I was a little scared about what was to come. Because I hated anything scary.

We were all sat there, with Kirsty at the end, Rachael in the middle, with me sat next to her and Rob. Jackson was sat next to Kirsty, and Kellan was in front of us. Me, Kirsty and Rachael had our pyjamas on, with our dressing gowns now, and we were all ready for bed, with our hot chocolate in front of us.

Rob was going to sleep in the spare room tonight, with Kellan on the floor, bless him, and Jackson was sleeping on the floor in Rachael's room. But it wasn't exactly on the floor, because we had mattresses for them to sleep on, with blankets and quilts, and pillows.

''These are all true stories.'' Kellan confirmed, grinning as he looked around at us all. I looked to Rachael, to see her eyes just as wide as mine, and looked back to Rob, who didn't look at all bothered. Yet.

I gulped, and looked back round to Kellan, knowing that I would probably freak out if the stories were too scary. That was just typically me, because scary stories weren't my thing at all, to be honest.

''So…there's a bridge in America, called Covert's Crossing,'' Kellan began, moving the lamp so that it was right I front of his face, making the story even more scary. ''But some call it Covert's Bridge too.'' He carried on.

''Well a young Couple had gotten married on Halloween. It's said that they were from the area, and wanted to have their reception at Covert's Castle, as it's supposed to be really scary there.'' He told us, making me shudder in response.

Especially, as he was looking round at us, with wide eyes, trying to freak us out even more. It was bloody working with me. Rachael grabbed the _after eight _chocolate box, and stuffed one into her mouth, but I was too scared to laugh.

She handed me the box, and I took one from her. She put the box back onto the floor, in the middle of the circle, and carried on watching Kellan with wide eyes, exactly like how I was doing too.

''Well, they'd just got married, and it was around midnight, so as you can imagine, it was really dark already.'' Kellan admitted, making me and Rachael shudder in response. I felt it as I leant to her, without even realizing that I was doing it.

''And it had just turned Halloween, and they were riding a Horse-drawn carriage, across the bridge, but…'' he trailed off, and I heard both mine and Rachael's breathe catch at the same time in response.

''BANG!'' I screamed in response at the same time that Rachael did, and I jumped; reaching out and grabbing Rachael's hands in my own. She squeezed my hands; sounding just as scared as I was.

Kellan chuckled; making sure that the sound was dark and eerie; just enough to scare us even more. Me and Rachael shuddered again in response.

''The carriage was crossing the bridge at the same time that the car was. But…the bridge was only one lane, so by the time they saw each other…it was too late.'' Kellan admitted, confirming our fears.

''Oh my god!'' I said in shock.

''That's sick!'' Rachael agreed, just as shocked as I was.

Kellan grinned in response, and carried on. ''Story has it, that they crashed, and the hubcap of the car flew off…decapitating the bride.'' Kellan added, making me feel even more scared. I shuddered again.

''Oh lovely.'' Rachael replied, sounding just as scared as I was still I was glad that we were both scared, even if we were the only ones. My hands were still in hers, but it was kinda helping me feel a bit better, because she was just as scared as me too.

''I know.'' Kellan agreed with Rachael, raising one eyebrow in response. ''The police never found anything; not her head or the body of the groom.'' Kellan added, making me feel even more scared.

''Oh my god.'' Me and Rachael said together.

''I know, and here's the best bit…'' Kellan trailed off, preparing himself to tell us the next part of the story, which was probably going to be the scariest, knowing mine and Rachael's luck. I took a deep breathe to prepare myself.

''It's been said a hundred times before that apparently if you sit on the bridge on Halloween night at around the same time that they were killed…you can see the headless bride standing on some rocks near the river.''

''Oh my dear god.'' Rachael shuddered. I shuddered with her in response to the true, sickening story.

Kellan grinned at her in response and carried on with the story still. ''We don't know if the Bride is either looking for her head, or…trying to find her lost love again.'' He admitted, looking around for our reaction.

''Oh my god…that's so sad, the last bit.'' I admitted, because it was. ''I mean, what if she really is trying to look for her lost love, bless her.'' I added sadly. It was such a sad story when you put it like that.

''I know.'' Kellan grinned at me. ''And scary too. You're reactions were a classic, when I said that bang.'' He laughed. ''Everyone jumps or screams when I tell that story.'' He added, laughing once again.

''Well what do you expect…god, that was scary!'' Rachael confirmed, shuddering again. I nodded, agreeing with her.

Kellan laughed. ''Have we got time for another ghost story, or no?'' Kellan asked us hopefully. I huffed in response, hoping that the answer would be no. He had scared me plenty enough for one night.

''No we haven't; I'm going to bed.'' Rachael confirmed, getting up.

''Me too.'' I said quickly, getting up with her.

Kellan huffed in response. ''Oh come on Guys, it wasn't that scary.'' Me and Rachael looked up to him in shock, because it had been _that_ scary. It had been really scary, and I was definitely pulling that duvet over my head tonight, and quickly going asleep.

''Kellan, that was _very_ scary.'' I promised him, making him laugh in response. I grabbed my _after eight box _in my hands, picking them up from the floor, because I wanted to eat them upstairs with the rest of my hot chocolate.

''I'm going too guys. I'm really tired.'' Kirsty confirmed.

''Yeah, I'm going to go and help Rachael set the beds up ready.'' Jackson agreed, following us all out of the living room.

''Well…its just you and me, Kid.'' I laughed as I heard Kellan say to Rob. I stopped outside the hallway doorway and watched Rob get embarrassed as Kellan wrapped his big arm around his neck.

I laughed as I saw Rob run his hand through the top of his hair, embarrassed by Kellan's behaviour, bless him.

''Night Kellan, Rob.'' Everyone called from the stairs.

''Yep, see you in the morning, Guys.'' Rob and Kellan called back. Kellan looked back to me, confused.

''Well aren't you going too, or are you sticking around for another scary story?'' He asked me, making me laugh in response.

''I don't think so. I don't want to know any more of your scary stories, thanks.'' I warned him, making him laugh easily in response to that.

''Fair enough, see you in the morning then.'' Kellan winked at me.

''Yeah, see you in he morning.'' I looked to Rob then. ''Night Rob.''

He smiled at me. ''Speak to you soon.'' He replied. I smiled, and walked upstairs then, yawning as I heard Rob and Kellan laughing between themselves, like how they usually did. I rolled my eyes, yawning again as I walked into my bedroom.

I yawned again, feeling so tired now, and I took my dressing gown off of me, and lying it on the side of my bed, as it was really warm in my room. I yawned again as I walked into my in-closed bathroom, and I got my toothbrush out, and brushed my teeth; ready for bed. I walked back into my bedroom, and turned the light off, leaving the desktop lamp on.

I climbed into bed, safely under the duvets, and cuddled up to my teddy bear Esme, as I watched a repeated episode of Family Guy that I had seen. I decided to watch it again though, because I had found this episode even more funnier than the rest that I had seen.

It was nearing to the end of the episode, and I was just about to fall asleep, when I looked up in shock. I gasped, almost screaming as I saw Rob was stood in the doorway. What the fuck was he doing, sneaking up on me like that?

''Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. I knocked…five times.'' He admitted sheepishly, whilst I tried to calm down from the shock that I was still in. I gasped for my breathe back, still in shock about him standing there, like that.

''Urm…that's okay, I was just in shock when I saw you standing there like that.'' I admitted, because it was true. I sat up in bed, quickly grabbing my blanket from the end of the bed, because I felt conscious now, as I sat up.

All I had on was my night top and shorts, and in front of sex god too. Rob smiled in response, and stayed stood where he was; leaning on the back wall, as he watched me. I looked up at him confused.

''Well come, sit down, if you want.'' I told him, because he looked a little unsure; stood like that, leaning against the wall by the bedroom door. He nodded, and walked over slowly as I turned my lampshade dimmed on a bit more, so that the light was on a bit more.

''If you're sure.'' Rob asked, sounding very shy now that the alcohol had worn off him. Truth was, I felt exactly the same, now that I was rather sober. I nodded, rolling my eyes in response to his question.

''Of course it is, come and sit.'' I promised him, patting the free side of my bed, as he sat down on the very edge of my bed, in front of me. He nodded, and got up again. He ran his hand through the top of his hair, and took a seat next to me, on the bed.

He put his feet up then, nodding his head, as if to say that he was comfortable now, making me laugh in response. ''You joker.'' I laughed at him again in response. He grinned back at me happily.

''I see you're watching Family Guy.'' He commented, still smiling as the Family Guy episode came to an end.

''Yeah, family guy's my favourite.'' I admitted, realizing that I still had my teddy bear Esme in my hand. I blushed bright red, and put my teddy bear back down on my bedroom side, so that it wasn't in my hands.

''So…was there a reason that you were here…just out of curiosity?'' I asked Rob confused. Because it was unusual for Rob to come here at night, unless there was a reason, or if something was wrong.

''Well…not really. I just kinda…wanted to speak to you for a bit. But if you're tired, then I can go if you want me too.'' He promised me, after he had seen me nearly falling asleep when he walked into my bedroom.

''No, no…I'd like you to stay.'' I promised him, because I really did want him to stay. I looked around at him, and caught him smiling at me. I smiled back, and looked back to the television as another family guy episode started.

I started to feel tired, but I was determined not to go to sleep until Rob left. Because I wanted to make the most of time of him being here, with me, alone. Because despite the wrongness of it, I wanted him to stay here.

***


	17. Pillows

I yawned, stretching my arms around Rob, after he had wrapped his arms around me. I was falling asleep, with my head resting on the side of his chest. His speeding heart was racing against my ear, as I listened to his heartbeat whilst I kept almost falling asleep.

The closeness of his body to mine, still managed to awaken the feelings that I still felt for him; the longing, the yearning, and the chemistry that was very much burning right now with how our skin touched.

But I was learning to ignore it, because I had forced myself to believe that this was what I wanted; because I still wanted to be friends with Rob, especially after tonight. It had been so fun with him, with us messing about as friends.

I didn't care that I was still yearning for more, because it wasn't right. I couldn't have the best of both worlds, and I couldn't decide on Nick or Rob, so I just had to make do as Rob as a friend of mine.

And if tonight was anything to go by then I could do that, I knew that I could. Especially, with having moments like these between us. These moments, when we were alone, were the best in every single way.

''Are you asleep?'' Rob whispered softly in my ear, from above me. I smiled against his chest in response.

''Nope, still hanging on.'' I replied in a quiet whisper. I felt his chest move as he chuckled quietly to himself below me, in response, which only made my grin widen in response.

''Don't feel like you have to, because of me. I'll go.'' Rob replied, starting to try and move from underneath me. My hands instantly reached out, and clawed at his white vest; stopping him from moving anywhere.

''Don't go yet, I want you to stay.'' I told him, because it was true. He sighed in response, and forced himself not to move.

''Everyone's expecting me to stay in the spare room.'' He warned me, making me sigh this time, as I snuggled deeper into his warm chest.

''Everyone's asleep.'' I reminded him sourly, whispering back. He sighed heavily in response again, and wrapped his arms back round me.

''I should go.''

''Why?'' I asked him confused. I mean, I know that it should have been obvious to me, but…well, I wanted him to stay. What was wrong with friends cuddling each other? It was alright for Girls to do it, so why wasn't it right for a Guy and a Girl to do it?

It would have been okay if the Guy was gay. If Rob was gay, then it would have been alright for him to cuddle me then, so it shouldn't matter if he wasn't gay either. Because we were just friends.

''It should be obvious Charlie. You're a smart Girl.'' He confirmed, trying hard to release his hands away from me again.

I wouldn't let him though; I wrapped my arms round his, and forced him to stay like this. He sighed heavily in response.

''It doesn't matter. We're friends, right?'' I asked him, just to make sure. I mean; I thought that we were, but I was just checking.

''Yeah we are, but you're a Girl, and I'm a Guy. If you asked anyone…anyone at all about what they thought of us, cuddling like this, then anyone would think that we're together-''

''-Who cares, I don't. We know that we're friends…anyway, I wouldn't expect you to care what anyone else thought, not after years with the paparazzi.'' I added, huffing in response as I thought about that.

''I wasn't talking about the paparazzi.'' Rob confirmed, which confused me. Who was he talking about then? ''I was talking about Nick.'' He added, making me freeze automatically against his body.

I felt guilty as soon as he had mentioned Nick's name, which was probably why Rob mentioned him, so that he could leave. And now, I was fucking mad.

''Nick's not a jealous guy, he's happy, and I imagine that if I explain to him about us two being friends, he would be okay with it, thanks.'' He warned him, huffing at him in response. I sighed, annoyed.

''Well, I was just saying. If I was Nick-''

''-Don't go there, you.'' I warned him, before sitting up, and hitting him with a pillow. I watched him take that in, in shock. He looked up at me in utter shock, making me laugh in response. He looked as though he really couldn't believe that I had just hit him with my pillow.

''I cant believe you just hit me…with your pillow.'' Rob confirmed in shock, as he sat himself up. I laughed again in response, meaner this time.

''Well, believe it.'' I told him, smirking at him.

He huffed in response, and grabbed another pillow, hitting me on the head. I gasped in shock, falling on the bed with the sheer force of how he hit me. I gasped in shock, angry now. I didn't care that he was Rob Pattinson, he couldn't just hit me; a Girl.

''You cant hit a Girl!'' I shouted him angrily. I hit him back, around his chest with my pillow in anger.

''I think I just did…and I'm going to do it again.'' He confirmed, grabbing hold of his pillow, and hitting me round my arm.

''Oh my god…you know that you are so getting it.'' I warned him, throwing myself at him, and sending him flying on the bed, falling. I laughed in response, and hit him round the chest until he said the words that I wanted him to say.

''Okay, okay, I give in!'' he shouted, making me laugh. I stopped hitting him, and threw the pillow on the side, getting off of him automatically, and lying back down, next to him. He laughed then, trying to catch his breathe.

''Worn out there, twilight bud?'' I asked him jokingly, even though I was just as breathless. He laughed again in response.

''Hell yes. I'm twenty eight, I think you forget that sometimes.'' He reminded me, laughing again. I shot him a confused glance.

''What has age got to do with it?'' I asked him confused.

''I'm getting old!''

''Ha! More like you need a good workout maybe, but you're not getting old for a long while yet.'' I promised him.

''Thanks a lot!'' He replied, huffing.

''You know what I mean; its definitely not because you're getting old. You're young and fit, still.'' I told him, playfully winking at him.

He grinned at me in response. ''You're just as out of breathe as me.'' He reminded me, which was true.

''True, but I am a few years younger than you.'' I admitted, making him laugh in response again to that one.

I leaned myself against his chest again then, feeling his raging heartbeat against my ear, as he caught his breathe.

''I think that I should go now. I feel a bit tired.'' He admitted, making me laugh.

''Okay then.'' I agreed with him, looking up at him. He looked back at me, smiling. That exact, same chemistry was still there between us, but I was convincing myself that it was getting easier and easier to ignore, even though it was becoming the total opposite.

We sat up at the same time, which caused our heads to bang together. ''OW!'' We shouted together, falling apart from each other, and rubbing the top of our heads. I laughed at him, as he had banged his head harder into mine.

''Let me look.'' I asked him, as he carried on covering his head with his hand, and moaning that it hurt. I laughed, because he wouldn't let me look. ''Let me look.'' I demanded, because he was still moaning that it hurt.

''God, just my fucking luck.'' He kept mumbling under his breathe, making me laugh in response, as I tried to see if he had a bruise there or whatever on his head, even though his fucking hand was still in the way!

''Rob, honestly, I cant fucking see-'' He tipped his head back, squeezing his eyes close, as if he was ready to go to sleep here. His mumbling was already dying down, and he did look quite cute, like that.

He opened his eyes again, and sighed heavily. I grinned in response, just as his hands took mine. That same burning feeling overwhelmed my senses. I looked up in shock, watching as he licked his lips.

I leaned in, something taking over me, and pressed my lips very softly to his, gauging his next reaction. I slipped my hands away from his own hands, and pressed them to his face; as I kissed him.

There was nothing sweeter than my lips pressed against his, waiting for his next reaction, to see how he would respond to the way my lips moved against his frozen ones. And I had already closed my eyes, as I took in the amazing flavour of him.

And it wasn't just the flavour that was getting to me. It was absolutely everything. That burning, intense longing and that electric, needing electricity had fizzled together, the moment that my lips had pressed to his.

And it was such an amazing feeling; like two worlds colliding, even if that did sound lame. It was like everything that a first kiss was meant to me, with the same, intense longing, and the sizzling chemistry smoldering into this amazing fire as soon as our lips touched. He wasn't kissing me back though, and as soon as I realised why, I remembered….Nick.

I gasped in horror to think of what I had done, and I pulled myself away from him; forcing me. The electricity faded, jolted in shock as soon as we had parted away from each other, and the guilt reminded me of what I had just done.

''Oh my god…'' I gasped in shock, quickly looking away from his wide eyes, shocked face. ''Oh my god…I am so sorry. I-I-I don't even…know what…came…over…god.'' I said, still in shock about it.

''I know that you don't feel the same; I know that you just want to be friends, and I'm sorry, its just that…its harder than I thought…getting over you, but-''

I didn't get time to finish, because his hands had stopped on either side of my face, and pulled my face roughly back to his with force. This time…he kissed me. His lips, eager against my own, moved roughly, gauging my reaction, and daring me to kiss him back.

I kissed him back then, my hands moving to his own face, and feeling he roughness of the stubble growing on his face below my fingers as we kissed. All coherent thought had gone out of the window, because that electricity had doubled over as soon as his lips touched mine.

It felt even better now that he was kissing me back, because that spark had ignited into the most amazing feeling possible, as we got ourselves caught up in this kiss. And then I remembered for the second time exactly why this was wrong. Nick.

I gasped again, and pulled away from him; feeling shamefully guilty for pulling away from Nick like this, doing this to Nick, and yet still wanting him. I climbed off of the bed just as guilt ridden tears flooded over my eyes.

''I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.'' I apologized through sobs, before I ran into my bathroom, and shut the door. I slid to the floor, feeling so guilty for what I had just done. It had been so wrong, and yet I had started it, and yet also wanted more!

How could I want both people? How could I want Rob and Nick in the exact same way? It was impossible, and so selfish. I couldn't have two people; it wasn't at all fair on either of them. Rob or Nick.

And yet all I fucking wanted; was them. How could I have turned into such a selfish person in a matter of a few days?

I heard my bedroom door close, telling me that Rob had gone, which made me feel even more guilty as I cried harder into my knees.

***


	18. Shame

I felt so awfully guilty when I woke up in the morning. I had cried myself to sleep the night before, but it hadn't working in getting me to a proper, night's sleep. I kept waking up; tormented with what I had done the night before.

I had a feeling that I wouldn't want to go downstairs either, especially if Rob was downstairs with everyone too. It would be awkward this morning, especially with the knowledge that I had kissed him, and not just once; but several times first, before he kissed me back.

And he had definitely kissed me back; there was no denying that. But why had he kissed me back for? I had tried to tell him that I understood that he didn't feel anything for me; that he wanted to be just my friend, but he had kissed me.

I was so confused, even more-so because I was so wrapped up in thinking about Rob, wondering why he had kissed me back, that I hadn't even thought about Nick yet. And as soon as I thought about him, I felt completely overwhelmingly guilty.

I put on an old, stripy top, and jeans; not even bothered about what I was wearing, because I was too concerned with what had happened last night, and what was going to happen today because of our kiss last night.

I walked downstairs to see everyone sat at the kitchen table…everyone that was, besides Rob. I smiled at everyone, seeing them all sat around the table, having a laugh, and took a seat next to Rachael and Kirsty.

''Hiya Chick…how are you feeling this morning?'' Rachael asked me, grinning at me. I smiled back, even though I knew that I probably looked as upset as I felt right now. I didn't know quite why though.

If I was upset because I felt as guilty as I possibly could this morning, or if I missed Rob…like how I knew that I shouldn't. I wasn't too sure about the answers, but I knew all the questions that I should be asking myself right now.

''I feel okay actually. Considering how much we drank last night.'' I added, smiling at Rachael, as she laughed in response. ''But I feel okay actually. No more ghost stories though please, Kellan!'' I warned him, making him laugh in response.

''So urm…where's Rob?'' I asked everyone, trying to sound like I was just asking casually, even though I knew that I failed miserably on that one. I sounded exactly like how I felt; anxious to see him, to at least see him again.

''He's gone home already, I think.'' Rachael replied, shrugging. ''I don't really know; we haven't seen him at all this morning, and he wasn't in his bedroom when we all woke up.'' Rachael added, confused.

I nodded, guessing that he had probably gone to make it easier for both of us. It would have been awkward if I had seen him sat downstairs, in the kitchen, after what had happened last night between us.

But that just meant that I had the whole of today to think about exactly what I had done wrong, and how I was going to have to try and work it out on my own now. I didn't have a clue about how I was going to do that though…


	19. Confessions

I sat in the living room, watching television, even though I wasn't really watching it, and feeling so glad that it was Saturday. I loved Saturday mornings, because they were always so quiet, and they felt a bit like Sunday to me, a little bit.

But today, I hated the quietness of the house. The Girls had gone out shopping again, with Kellan and Jackson, and I hadn't gone with them, because I knew that there would be no point. Whether I sat here or went shopping, I would just be thinking about it all day.

My phone began to ring then though, playing mine and Rob's song, that we had messed about, and said that it was, after we were writing _Party Time_ together. It was; _Sweat_, by a reggae band, and even now, I couldn't help but giggle and blush a bit as I heard it.

But the guilt instantly wracked me, and made me stop giggling automatically as I answered my mobile. I looked at the I.D. name, to see that it was Rachael's number. I smiled a little bit, and answered the mobile.

''Hello?'' I answered, feeling a little confused. It was a bit of a surprise that Rachael waa finding the time to ring me when there was both shopping and our sex god's involved. I mean…they're sex god's involved. I shouldn't even be thinking like that about Rob, after what had happened last night.

It was wrong. Really wrong. And it was about time that I realized that and stopped calling him my sex god. I had Nick to think about her. I had to be good, if I was to make a final decision about what I was about to do now.

''Hello darling,'' Rachael replied, before laughing silly. I laughed with her in response, rolling my eyes at how happy she sounded, bless her. ''Guess where I am?'' She asked me, giggling again, just as I was about to ask her if she was having fun shopping.

''Urm, I don't know…how about…Los Angeles shopping centre?'' I asked her, snickering after I had asked her. that's where she had told me she was going anyway. Where else could she be after all?

''Well…we went there, but we didn't get very much, because there wasn't a lot there really…it was all really expensive.'' She admitted.

''Oh…so where are you now then?'' I asked her confused. I didn't know where she was going with this, so I asked her instead.

''We're at the Boys house, and Rob's here.'' As soon as Rachael mentioned Rob; the guilt caught up with me again. I tried to swallow, and I cleared my throat as I replied to what Rachael had just said.

''Oh…well cool.'' I replied, sitting up on the sofa.

''Yeah, and Rob wants to speak to you. We were going to put you on speaker phone, but he says he needs to talk to you about something or other.'' She admitted, confirming my fears. He wanted to talk to me, about last night.

I chickened out of it automatically, and prepared myself to make an excuse. To tell Rachael anything to get off of this phone now, before he could talk to me about it. I had enough things to think about.

''No, that's okay. I really have to go, I need to ring Nick. Tell Rob, that I'll…er, speak to him later.'' I asked her.

''Urm…okay, bye then.'' Rachael agreed, before I put the phone down quickly. I walked into the garden and had a cigarette, to calm me down. I felt so stressed, so confused about what I should do for the best. Nick or Rob.

If anyone would have asked me that question one week ago; then the decision would have been easy. It would have been Rob automatically, but now that I had Nick…I wasn't sure. They were both exactly what I wanted.

I sighed heavily as I heard the front door go, and I heard Rachael's loud voice echo through the house. ''Well, I bet she's smoking.'' I heard her say.

I heard a muffled reply, but I couldn't quite catch onto who it was exactly. ''Well, just go and see her.'' Rachael added, catching my attention again.

I listened as I heard small footsteps through the house, and I waited to see who it was that Rachael had been speaking to. However, it was fair to say that I wasn't too surprised when Rob walked out of the back door.

I looked away quickly, taking a well needed inhale of my cigarette to calm me down. I knew why he was here…to talk to me, but I also knew that that wasn't such a good idea what with the way that our talking went.

''I…I came to apologize.'' Rob admitted awkwardly. But it wasn't him that needed to apologize. It was me. And yet, this was now going to be awkward between us for a long time, because you didn't just kiss someone like that.

''There's no need.'' I promised him, because I didn't think that there really was any need for him to apologize. He had done nothing at all wrong, besides kissing me back. That had confused me a bit.

''I think there is. I…well, you know what I did.'' He didn't even seem to be able to talk about what he had done. What we had both done, last night. Truth was, the guilt was wracking me up too, but we still needed to talk about this.

I wanted us to just…both sit down, and talk about what was going on between us, to see if it was just me, or him too, but I had a feeling that I would only chicken out of it; because that's what I was best at.

''Well, don't just stand there and apologize…please. Take a seat, I want to talk you.'' I admitted, because it was true. I shifted up on the sofa, letting him take a seat if he chose to sit down next to me, and let me talk to him about this.

''Ok…ay.'' Rob agreed awkwardly, shifting forward on his feet, and forcing himself to take a seat next to me. I heard him take a deep breathe, and noted how it shook, as if he was nervous about this conversation.

The truth was that I was just as nervous as him about this conversation, but we just had to get over it, and talk, because I was fed-up of feeling awkward around him; especially after we had kissed last night.

I hated feeling awkward around him, because I desperately wanted to get over him, and both of us wasn't making this easy on ourselves. Me especially, as I had kissed him first last night, and totally out of the blue too.

So I had convinced myself that talking about this might make this a little easier for us…or more frustrated, either one. There was no word from Nick yet, and the more time that I spent away from Nick, and being pushed to Rob; the harder it was getting for me to try and tell myself that this was what I wanted. Friends. With Rob. Boyfriend. With Nick.

''There's been something that's been bothering me for a long while. Ever since I met you, actually.'' I admitted sheepishly. ''I don't know if you feel the same, though I doubt that you do. So I'm just going to go with it, and make an idiot of myself, because I need to tell you.'' I admitted, starting to babble on now.

''When I met you…there was this _something_ that pulled me to you. And not just like how it was when a fan met their hero, but…a deep sort-of chemistry. I suppose that you could say that it did funny things to me.'' I laughed as I said that.

''It made me blush more than I usually do, be more quieter than I normally am, and…well, I guess you could say that…I wanted you…because of that chemistry that I felt between us. Especially when we were dancing…my god…I didn't think that it could get any worse.'' I admitted, laughing awkwardly.

''That's why I leaned into kiss you, because…well, I don't know. Something just kept pulling me into you, like this amazing kinda pull.'' I admitted, struggling to find the right words. ''And I had been so scared that you were mortified with my behaviour when you ran off like you did.'' I admitted, because it was true.

''I can promise you that it was the opposite.'' Rob admitted, talking now that he had the chance now. I forced myself to look at him, to take in what he was going to say to me; whether I liked it or not.

''You intrigued me a little bit, when I first met you…you still do really.'' He admitted sheepishly. ''You were unlike I ever met before, and I'm being serious here. You were a laugh and you weren't even trying to impress me.''

That got me confused. ''Why would I be trying to impress you exactly?'' I asked him, thinking he had a bit of a big head now. I mean…I hadn't been trying to impress him, but he clearly thought that I had.

''Because most fans try to impress me when they meet me…they think they stand a chance. But that's the one thing I hate…people trying to be someone else. You were yourself, and I really liked that.'' He admitted.

I grinned in response, liking the fact that he was admitting that. It meant a hell of a lot to me, coming from him. Especially as I had done it without thinking; I had just been myself, because there was no point acting like something that you're not.

''You mean a lot to me, Charlie.'' Rob admitted out of the blue, shocking me. I looked at him confused, seeing him gaze out into the garden. I sighed heavily, quickly looking away as he gazed back to me.

''Don't say that, Rob. Please.'' I begged him, because I didn't need to hear it. It was wrong, not with Nick still in my life. It was only making it that much harder to get over Rob, but he wouldn't know that.

''I mean it. I've tried to tell myself to stop being stupid, but it never works. When I kissed you back yesterday…I meant what I did. And I know that I apologized for it, but I don't regret, because…well, because…''

''Because what?'' I asked him confused, seeing that he was struggling for words. I just wanted him to tell me, because I was just as frustrated as him with everything going on right now. I felt so confused about what I was feeling, because I hadn't got much experience with Boys.

I only had one Boyfriend before, and he had been awful. There had been so much trouble between me, my Boyfriend, and his friends. My useless Ex had even smoked weed when we were together, even though he had promised me that he wouldn't.

Like I had said many times before; John Pryce had been a total douche, and I could safely say that I was well and truly over him; even if it had taken me ages to.

''Because…'' he sighed heavily, after trailing off again, and got himself off of the outdoor sofa, turning away from me. I watched Rob confused, not sure what he was going to say next. I didn't understand what he was trying to tell me.

''Just say it, Rob.'' I begged him, because I wanted him to tell me. I wanted to know what was on his mind. He sighed heavily, and turned around, looking at me. I kept my eyes on him, knowing that I looked as confused as I felt.

He frowned unhappily as he leaned himself against the wall, behind him, and ran his right hand through the top of his messy hair. He took a deep breathe, and I waited patiently for him to work up to whatever he wanted to say.

''Here's the thing, Charlie.'' He started, clearing his throat awkwardly, as he forced himself to carry on. ''I really like you. I have from the start, but the thing is…'' he trailed off, exhaling in frustration.

''For god sake you idiot, just get on with it.'' He mumbled to himself, looking up to the sky in frustration as he leaned back against the wall. I waited for him to get whatever he wanted to say out, taking one last inhale of my cigarette.

I put it out on the floor, and went back to looking to Rob, waiting for him to calm himself down enough for him to tell me. I looked down at his hands, which were now shaking uncontrollably by his sides.

''Hey, chill out Rob, honestly.'' I tried to laugh it off. I got up from the outdoor sofa, and walked up to him, taking his still shaking hands in mine, trying to calm him down. I still wanted him to know that I was here for him.

Just not in the way that I had wanted in the exact same way in the beginning. Just as friends, like how it should be. We were better as friends, even if I was struggling to believe that myself, at the minute.

There was so much to think about now, I had Nick to think about now. And I couldn't ever hurt him.

''Charlie…'' Rob trailed off again, sounding more confident now though. I looked up at him, and smiled at him in encouragement. He had stopped shaking now, telling me that he wasn't as nervous as before.

He smiled back, slightly unsure about whatever he was about to confess to me. ''I like you a lot, but…its not enough. I'm sorry, but…I think…I think that…that…'' he trailed off again.

He sighed heavily, and took a breathe before forcing the words from his mouth. ''I think that I'm falling for you, Charlie.'' He admitted, shocking me. I looked back up at him with wide eyes, before realizing that he was being serious.

Oh god.

''I know that I haven't known you for long, but I feel like I have. I feel very close to you already.'' Rob admitted, throwing these confessions at me all in one go.

''Wait…please, just wait, and give me a minute to take this all in…I just…I didn't expect this from you…I'd convinced myself that you didn't feel like that.'' I admitted, letting go off his hands.

''Okay.'' He nodded, and let me take this all in. I sat down on the sofa, struggling on what to do, and what to say now. I had to make a decision and now, but….how? If I chose Nick, then where would that leave me and Rob?

If I chose Rob, then how would things be with Nick? Would he still want to be my friend? Probably not.

How on earth was I going to make a decision, when I was splitting my brain in half, in order to try and think about what was right to do, rather than what I wanted.

Because, what I wanted was Rob, but that wasn't what was right. It wasn't right on Nick, not if this hurt him. But then…if I didn't choose Rob, then I'd be hurting him, which I knew would only hurt me too, because Rob meant so much to me…so what was I to do?

***


	20. Choice

I swung lightly from the outdoor chair, thinking carefully about what decision that I was about to make. I couldn't choose between Rob or Nick, even though the choice should be obvious. If Nick hadn't been in my life, I'd know what to do.

I'd choose Rob over any Guy, because…well, the truth was that I definitely wouldn't have been able to say no. But now that Nick was in my life, things were different. Nick meant the world to me already.

''It would be best if…we were friends.'' I told him, because it was true. He had no idea how hard it had been for me to try and get over him recently. I had been so sure for years that it wasn't just a crush on a celebrity.

And I had been right. Madly so, I had been in love with my hero, even if that did sound freaky. There was no denying it. And now he was confessing all this to me…it was just making it harder to move on, like I should.

''I don't want to know what's for the best. I know what to do for the best; to leave you alone with Nick, but I cant. I want to know what you _want_.'' Rob confirmed, making me sigh heavily in response.

He wasn't making this any easier, by saying it like that. Didn't he realize how hard it was for me to say no to him, when I wanted to be with him? Nick was the perfect Guy for me, and I shouldn't be doing this to him.

''You should know what I want. You got enough hindsight last night.'' I huffed at him, getting up from the outdoor sofa and moving away, after he tried to console me. That definitely wasn't helping.

''Well then…what's stopping you?'' Rob asked from behind me. I heard him get up from the outdoor sofa too, and I moved further away, hoping that he wasn't following me. I didn't need him making this any harder than it already was, right now.

''Nick, of course!'' I warned him, sighing heavily as soon as I had mentioned Nick's name. How could Rob even forget about him, like how he had? It wasn't right or fair to do this to him, especially because I couldn't choose.

''Well…'' Rob trailed off, thinking carefully about that. ''I think that you should tell him. The truth.'' Rob suggested, shocking me. I turned back round, and looked back at him, to see that he was actually being serious.

''No…No, I cant.''

''Why not?''

''Because he means a lot to me. He means almost as much as you mean to me.'' I spelled it out for him. ''I cant hurt him. And I want to be with _him_.'' I added, spelling it out for him more clearly now.

''You don't mean that.'' Rob disagreed with me. ''Just a minute ago, you said that you wanted _me_ but that it wasn't what you _needed_. You're lying…about Nick.'' He realized suddenly. I sighed in frustration.

''Look, okay…stop it. Please. I want both of you, I cant choose between you. But it would be right for me, to choose Nick. Okay, is that clear enough for you?'' I snapped furiously. I exhaled in frustration, because he was still looking at me in shock.

''I've chosen what I should have chosen in the beginning. Nick, okay? So just…please…understand why I've done it for.'' I begged him, about to walk in the house to get away from him.

''No…you _want_ me. And I fee exactly the same about you; why should you miss out just because you want to try and do things for the right?'' He stopped me, taking my right wrist in his hand, and stopping me going anywhere.

''Because its better if we do things for the right, that's why. I would only be hurting Nick…and me, if I broke up with him. I need to get over you, please do me this favour and understand.'' I begged him, looking at him.

''I don't want you to.'' He spelled it out for me, taking a step forward closer. I pushed him away from me, and walked into the house, before he could stop me. It wasn't right, none of this was right.

''I wont give up.'' Rob's voice from behind me, was what made me snap. I turned around, and looked at him.

''If you cared about me like you say that you do…if you feel anything for me, you'll do me this favour, please. I need you in my life as a friend, but if you wont give in, and let me be happy, then…well I don't want to know.'' I warned him, because that was the truth.

What I needed was a friend right now, uncomplicated and easy. Yes, I was still crazy about him, but it wasn't right. I felt guilty about talking to Rob like that, but he had needed to know the truth. How I felt.

''Are you getting drunk with us tonight, darling?'' Rachael asked me from the living room, as I walked past.

''No, I'm going to bed.'' I shot back, climbing up the stairs to get away from this situation, before I cried, like I knew that I was about to.

''ROB, WHAT DID YOU DO TO CHARLIE?'' I heard Rachael scream through the house; sounding extremely pissed now. I tried not to laugh as I climbed up the stairs, because if I did, then I would only start crying, which is not what I wanted to do.

I walked into my bedroom, shutting the door behind me, and locking it, and laid down on my bed, just as the tears started. I hoped that Rob would be happy to be my friend, because if not…then I had just told him to get lost basically. I still wanted him in my life, because he meant so much to me, but I had basically told him to get lost if he didn't like being my friend. So I couldn't help but cry about it. Because he meant a hell of a lot to me still, and I was afraid that I had made the biggest mistake of my life.

***


	21. Friends?

I curled myself further against myself as I heard the door go again. I could hear little mumblings of what was going on, and I knew that Kellan and the gang had now safely gone. But I was too tired to go downstairs.

The reason for this was because I had been crying so much that I was so tired. And I wasn't going to be opening the door to anyone tonight, not with the state of me. Two, loud knocks at the door caught my attention, making me jump in shock.

''Charlie, open the door.'' It was Rachael. I sighed in relief, kinda expecting it to be Rob, but then…I had no chance of that now, did I? Especially after I had spoken so harshly to Rob, like that.

''Charlie, open this door. I need to talk to you.'' She called again. I threw my head into the pillow; forcing it around my head, and tried to ignore her calling for me to open the door, as I sobbed into the pillow.

I knew exactly how I was feeling right now, but I hoped that it would go away, because what I wanted so badly, was Rob to be here. And not just as a friend, but…more. I wanted him to be here; to hold me to him, and tell me the words that I wanted to hear, as he kissed me…and it was so wrong.

I didn't understand why I wanted this, not when I had been so wrapped up in Nick this afternoon. I shouldn't be feeling this, and I was so angry with myself, that I hit out, and threw my pillow at the wall in temper.

''Okay, but…I'll come back later to check on you, and if I have to break this down; I promise you that I will kick this down, darling.'' Rachael warned me, making me smile just a little bit in response.

I heard her feet walking off, and I started crying again, desperate for some release from the pain that I felt, and was aching my heart. It hurt so badly, but it was still my own fault for this whole mess.

''Urm…Charlie.'' I stopped crying automatically, hearing Rob's quiet voice outside my bedroom door. I tried to be quiet, tried to pretend that he wasn't here, and I hoped that he would think that he had just heard something…that I had gone, or something.

''Open this door please…I know you're in your bedroom.'' He confirmed, making me sigh heavily. No use in trying to hide it out then. I forced myself to get up off of the bed, and I walked over to the bedroom door, preparing myself to ask him to leave…beg, if I had to.

Just for tonight anyway, so that I had some time to think about things. Rob didn't want to just be my friend, he had that made that perfectly clear. But I couldn't be anything else, even if that was what we both wanted.

I knew that that didn't make any sense, but I knew that it would be easier for everyone if I kept with Nick. I didn't want to hurt Nick, and as much as I wanted Rob, the other half of me wanted Nick too.

''Rob…I'm tired. Just leave it for tonight, please.'' I begged him through the door separating us, because the truth was that I was too tired. I just wanted to sleep tonight, and talk about things tomorrow.

I had too much to think about as it was, so I doubted that I would be able to sleep much as it was. Couldn't he just leave it at that? I hoped so, because the more I talked about it, the more that it stressed me out.

''I just want to talk to you…even if its just for a minute.'' Rob replied, asking me to let him in. I sighed, wishing that he would just leave me alone for tonight. He had given me too much to think about as it was.

''Please, just leave me alone.'' I begged him, because all I wanted to do was get a good night's sleep first, before we talked to each other about this. Was that so much to ask for? I heard him exhale in frustration, outside my bedroom door.

''Five minutes…that's all I ask…you can even sleep on my chest again, if you want?'' he offered playfully, meaning it as a joke. I huffed in response to that though, because that just wasn't funny at all.

''Ha ha Rob, that's just hilarious after what happened last night-''

''-I was just joking!'' Rob interrupted my panicking, trying to laugh it off. I huffed in response, annoyed with him now, and shook my head in response. It hadn't been funny at all…okay, so maybe a little bit.

I smiled a little, because it was hard not to. This is how I wanted it to be; to be able to be friends with him and have a joke with him, like how I wanted to, but everything was too complicated now.

''Okay, so I wasn't actually joking.'' Rob confessed outside my bedroom door, making me sigh in frustration in response. ''But…only because…well, I want to be in your life Charlie…even if it means that we can only be friends, I'll just…I'll deal with it.'' Rob promised.

The guilt caught up with me instantly, because he sounded so upset about us. I so badly wanted to…well, it wasn't the time to think about that. I opened the door then, wanting to see if he was okay.

He grinned at me in response, pleased that he had actually got me to open the door. I smiled back, before looking away quickly. His smile was enough to make everything else disappear; the wrong, the right…anything.

Which wasn't what I needed right now, not with everything else that I had going on in my head right now.

''I knew that you wouldn't be able to resist my offer.'' Rob teased me jokingly, making me roll my eyes in response.

''Oh hell yeah.'' I joked back, hoping that he wouldn't see that I had been crying. He laughed in response, but that quickly disappeared and I knew why. He was looking at me closely…working it out…

''Have you been crying?'' Rob asked me in shock. I blushed bright red, and quickly looked down at the floor while I tried to compose myself enough to lie to him. I didn't want him knowing that I had been crying.

''Urm…no. I just keep…yawning.'' I admitted lying. I knew that I totally sucked at lying, and that he wouldn't believe me, and I kept chewing on my bottom lip as I waited for him to reply to that one.

''You're such a terrible liar, Charlie.'' Rob sighed heavily in response. I managed to half smile, because it was true. I was the most terrible liar possible, and when it came down to it…I didn't really expect him to believe me.

''It's true.'' I replied, trying to keep my eyes on the floor so that I didn't have to see the reaction on Rob's face in response to my crying. I didn't want him to think that I was just weak or something.

''Charlie…you look like you're going to cry.'' He warned me, even though I didn't feel like I was going to…yet. I looked up in shock after Rob took my hand in his. I smiled back at him, watching him walk closer, in confusion.

He watched me to make sure that it was okay, before he wrapped his arms around me, trying to console me. It felt weird actually…with my head on his shoulder like this, but…it didn't take me long for me to start crying again.

But I didn't even know why I was crying for now, which made it even more embarrassing. I looked up at him in shock, feeling the bed from underneath me. He smiled as I stopped crying now.

I looked towards the door in confusion, to see that he had already shut the door. I had missed that one. I looked back to Rob, and smiled sheepishly after I had cried in front of him, and looked away quickly.

''Are you alright now?'' Rob asked me concerned. I nodded, looking down at the bed still, ignoring his gaze that I could feel on me. I took his hands in my hands, and trailed the lines on the back of his hands.

''I'm sorry…I don't even know why I was crying for…but thanks for not being embarrassed.'' I laughed awkwardly.

He laughed too. ''It's what _friends_ do.'' He replied, catching me off guard. I looked back to him in shock, just as I was about to dry my eyes. Did he still want to be my friend then? No, surely not.

''I told you, Charlie. You mean a lot to me, but I want to be in your life in any way. I'm happy to be your friend because you mean a lot to me.'' He promised me, smiling at me in reassurance as he squeezed my hands.

''Will you…stay? With me, here…as my friend?'' I asked him, because I was starting to feel tired now, and I still wanted him to stay with me. I yawned tiredly to back up my claim, making Rob laugh.

''Okay…I will, but…I'll sleep above the covers.'' That was a wise idea, as friends. I nodded, and got into the covers, snuggling up.

''Here.'' I gave Rob a blanket to keep him warm in the night.

''I'm alright.'' Rob shook his head, not taking it.

''Take it, it gets cold in this room at night.'' I promised him, because it was true. He smiled then and took the blanket from me, wrapping it around himself.

''Thanks.'' He replied, snuggling up to me through the covers after I turned the bedside lamp off, and started to fall asleep.

''Charlie?'' Rob asked quietly; whispering.

''Yeah?'' I asked back curiously, wondering what he wanted as I smiled against the quilt, waiting for his reply.

''Night.'' he said, making giggle.

''Night Rob.'' I replied, snuggling more into his shoulder which I could reach to above the duvet around me.

''Twilight Buds?'' Rob asked me curiously, holding out his little finger for me to take, which made me laugh.

''Twilight Buds.'' I agreed, wrapping my little finger around his and giving it a gentle squeeze, before I pulled away again. He laughed too in response, before we both slowly started to fall asleep.

***


	22. Decisions, Decisions

When I woke up in the morning, I still felt tired a little bit, because of how I had been crying the night before. I sighed, and stretched my arms out, turning to the right slightly as I did, where I saw…

I giggled in response, trying to be quiet. Rob was laid flat out, next to me, and above the covers still. He looked peaceful in his sleep, and I had to wonder what he was dreaming about whilst he was sleeping, looking so peaceful like he did.

I looked back round to my clock, which was still on my bedside table, to see that it was nine already. I got up from my bed, and grabbed some clothes from my wardrobe, and walked into my separate bathroom.

I got in the shower, and washed my hair quickly, before getting out and changing into my clothes that I had brought with me. I put on the dress that I had brought with me to the bathroom, which was a pretty, orange-red dress, with different styles of patterns on them.

I put on some white flip flops to match the unusual, white patterns on my dress, and quickly dried and straightened my hair, before I walked back into the bedroom to see if Rob was now awake yet.

He was gone though, when I walked back into the bedroom, so I walked outside my bedroom, and looked about for him. I noticed Rob walking out of the spare room, with a different, white vest on, and blue jacket.

He smiled at me shyly. ''Morning,'' he grinned at me shyly, as if afraid he had been caught. I grinned back happily in response. Happy, because I was glad that he stayed, and that he was going to be making the effort to be my friend, despite how hard I knew it was for him.

''Good morning, and…how are you today?'' I asked Rob politely, knowing that I sounded a bit too enthusiastic in the way that I asked him…but that was only because I wanted him to know that…well that I was here for him really, in any way that he wanted.

Besides as a Girlfriend.

He laughed in response, not noticing how I was trying to fake the enthusiasm, luckily. ''Okay thanks, twilight bud.'' He replied happily, making me giggle in response. I had forgotten all about our little name-tag for each other.

''How about you, twilight bud?'' He asked me back, making me grin and blush embarrassedly in response. I didn't think that I would ever get over our nickname for each other, I doubted that much.

''Well, I'm glad to hear that _twilight bud_.'' I replied, making him laugh in response. ''And I'm feeling particularly good this morning.'' I replied, because it was true. I supposed that the reason why I felt so good was because Rob was here with me.

I always felt happier when he was with me, though that was probably just because…well…well, he was a friend, that's all. That was probably why I was happier when I was with him, that made sense.

''So…are you doing anything today?'' Rob asked me as we walked downstairs together. I smiled, and shook my head, because at this minute; I didn't think that I was doing anything. I watched as Rachael went to get the front door, knowing that it didn't matter if she saw us.

Because the fact was we were just friends, so it didn't matter if Rob had stayed over. From last night, was a new start, and I really couldn't be any happier than how I was this morning. I was so happy.

''Urm, if you want…I mean, you don't have to, but maybe we could hang out together today, and maybe-''

''-Is Charlie there?'' Nick's voice abruptly stopped Rob from talking. I smiled at Rob, and looked back to the door, to see Nick standing in the doorway. He grinned up at me as soon as I had looked at him, and I smiled back.

But…something felt wrong now. I had kinda been looking forward to spending the day with Rob, but I knew why Nick was here. To spend the day with me. I was excited to spend the day with Nick, but I still wanted to spend the day with Rob too, as a friend.

''Hiya.'' I greeted Nick, walking down the stairs, and to walking to the front door. I wasn't too sure what else to say, but I could tell by Rob's face that he was just as gutted about this as I was. I smiled apologetically at Rob as he walked into the kitchen.

He smiled back, though he still looked a bit annoyed, and walked into the kitchen. I sighed, and looked back to Nick, now that Rachael had gone again.

''I was just wondering, if er…maybe you wanted to go on a date?'' Nick asked me, giving me time to say no. I had a feeling that maybe…well, that maybe I should end this now and say no, and choose Rob, but…despite how much I liked Rob, I still liked Nick too.

''Urm…yeah. I'd love to, I really would.'' I admitted sheepishly, because I still felt like I did want to go on this date with Nick.

''Okay, are you ready to go now, or?''

''Why don't you come inside whilst I have my breakfast, and then we can go?'' I offered. He nodded, and grinned, following me into the house.

''It's a nice house, you have.'' Nick commented politely. I smiled at him, looking around for Rob as soon as we were in the kitchen. He wasn't here though, and for that I was disappointed. I wanted to see him again.

I got on with breakfast, and sat down at the kitchen table to eat my cereal, whilst Nick talked about a new film that was on at cinema, whilst I listened to him. Despite my ever-growing feelings for Rob, I was still into Nick too.

Rob walked into the kitchen then, and I grinned at him, happy that he was back in the house. I guessed that he had a cigarette whilst he was out in the garden, which is what I needed right now. I was feeling a little stressed, to be fair.

Rob grinned back, but quickly walk past me, as he looked to Nick, making me sigh in response. But I could understand his frustration for Nick being around here after everything that had happened with me and Rob.

My eyes followed Rob out of the room whilst Nick continued to speak, and then I thought of an excuse to talk to Rob. ''I'll be right back.'' I promised Nick after he had finished talking, and waked into the living room where Rob was.

''Hi.'' I grinned at Rob as I sat myself down next to him on the sofa. He grinned back at me in response.

''Hey…are you going on your…_date _then?'' Rob asked me curiously, sounding as though he was forcing himself to ask, to be nice.

''Urm…yeah in a minute, but I wanted to ask if you wanted to go wherever you wanted to take me to today after I come back from my date? As mates, of course.'' I added. Just to make it clear, and as though I wasn't sending mixed signals to him.

''Okay, I'd like that.'' Rob agreed, grinning at me.

I smiled back, happy now. I had something to look forward to after my date with Nick now, to make the day even better.

''Good, well I'll see you later then.''

''Okay.'' Rob promised.

As I got ready to go on my second date with Nick, I thought about how I was feeling right now. What I should be thinking about.

With Rob, I was crazy about him. I had been crazy about him for years, but enough was enough. It wasn't right to be _that_ madly in love with someone who you hadn't even met. I wanted to get over him.

With Nick, I was slowly falling for him. It would be hard with how I felt about Rob, but I adored Nick, and I knew that in time, it would feel somewhat half of how I felt for Rob. But…could I be with someone who I only partly liked when there was another Guy who had already won my heart years ago?

***


	23. Cinema Kiss

I was a little surprised about where Nick had taken me for our date, but as in a good surprise. He had taken me to the cinema, and as we strolled into the short queue to get our tickets, I wondered what we were going to see.

''Why don't you get whatever you want for the cinema and I'll get the tickets?'' Nick asked me, as he handed me a $10 dollar bill. I glanced at him suspiciously, because we had loads of time, so why wasn't he letting me stay in the queue with him?

''What are you up to?'' I asked him suspiciously. He grinned at me, trying to look innocent, even though it did not work.

''Nothing, just…well, I thought that maybe you'd want to get a drink or something, whilst I get the tickets.'' He admitted, still smiling, even though he was always smiling a little bit. He was trying to look innocent this time.

''Well, I want to stay with you.'' I admitted, squeezing his hand, which was still in mine, because I wanted to see what we were going to see. Nick laughed and shook his head in response to how I was.

''Well…how about you go and sit down then? I wont be a minute.'' Nick suggested sweetly. I watched him suspiciously, wondering what he was up to. He grinned back innocently, trying to make myself believe that he was just being nice.

''What are you up to Nick?'' I asked him suspiciously, because I absolutely hated surprises. It was no secret; I couldn't stand it when things were kept from me, and he wasn't doing any favours from keeping whatever it was from me.

It was just making me feel a little panicky, and a little annoyed too. Surprises were so not my thing.

''Nothing,'' he replied, laughing. But it wasn't an easy laugh now, it was uneasy, and I could tell that he was struggling to keep up the façade to cover up whatever he was trying to cover up from me.

''I just thought that it would be easier if I get tickets…and I want the cinema to be a surprise.'' He admitted, making me roll my eyes in response. I would know what we were going to see in about…thirty minutes anyway, so what was the point of that?

And then I started to think…started to realize really, that maybe he wasn't telling me what we were going to see yet until we got into the cinema showing to kinda be…I don't know, romantic, I guess.

Most people liked surprises in dating and stuff, but not me, so he had a lot to learn about me yet, but maybe he had just tried to make the effort. It was very much like Nick, and something that he would do.

''Okay, I get it. I'll be sat over then.'' I told him, making him chuckle in response as I walked over to a free table, right next to where the queue was. I grinned over at him, and he grinned back, and winked at me, making me giggle in response.

It wasn't helping with the fact that I got embarrassed practically constantly, and blushed bright red all the time. It didn't take too long for Nick to get our tickets and he walked straight over to me, whilst I tried to get a preview of our tickets, and what we were seeing.

He laughed at me in response, catching me doing it. ''Nice try.'' He commented, stuffing the tickets into his pocket. I blushed bright red in response, and quickly looked away, making him laugh in response, as he walked us over to the counter to get drinks and popcorn, hand in hand again.

He quickly handed his tickets to the Guy to take, whilst still managing to hide them from me, and we walked into the cinema together, whilst I tried to guess what we were going to see. It didn't help the fact that he had pushed me through the door practically, so I didn't get to see the header for what we were seeing.

I sighed heavily, still blushing as I took a seat in the cinema, next to Nick. He laughed in response, and kept talking about me about why he had to rush off the other day whilst the adverts came on in the cinema.

And then, that's when the show came on. I gasped in response, blushing bright red as I guessed the film as soon as the movie had started. Oh my god…stuck in a situation with two Guys, and my date had taken me to watch the Guy who I couldn't get out of my mind. Great.

I glanced at Nick confused, but he just grinned in response. ''I knew that you liked the movie…Rachael kinda told me. I thought that it would be a good idea to take you to see it, they were doing special showings today.'' Nick admitted, whispering to me.

''Ur yeah…great.'' I replied, not sounding too thrilled at the idea. that's because I really wasn't. ''Thanks.'' I whispered back, trying to sound grateful. I mean, it wasn't Nick's fault for the way that _I_ was feeling.

It was my fault, and now I had to sit through two hours of watching Rob. The one Guy that was constantly on my mind. I felt sick. Really, I actually felt sick. This was not going very well, especially when I knew what I had to come.

I had read the book a thousand times before, and admittedly, I was a huge fan of it. But in the book…Tom-which was who Rob was playing-had a lot of scenes in it. A lot of uncomfortable scenes too.

Sure, it was harrowing at first; I must have cried a million times as I read about how Tom had fallen so deeply in love with Elizabeth, and how he was desperately trying to find her, after a summer romance.

But then…yeah. When he does find her…there are a lot of scenes that were quite…sure to be great for me to watch. Or not. Uncomfortable was more the word, especially with Rob in this film. The Guy who I quite possibly wanted to do that to.

But I was determined to give this film a try, despite how I was feeling right now; especially with how awkward that I felt about it, and as the film showed how Tom innocently flirted with Elizabeth…I could take that.

The start of the film was okay. They don't kiss, they don't do anything, just flirting. But later in the film, although its not described in the book, I knew that it was definitely going to be seen on film, and that was definitely going to be…awkward.

And as the film got on, and he finally found her again…I was right. And I didn't think that I was actually going to be able to sit here and watch as it got worse. I was definitely not feeling very awkward…but worst.

A hell of a lot worse.

Was it so wrong to so want to be the actress in that film, getting undressed by Rob Pattinson himself? Urm…yes, I had a feeling that it was. And that annoying, awkward jealousy turned in the pit of my stomach as I watched it go on.

But I was used to that jealousy. I had experienced it for years whenever I watched films where he had to kiss another actress or whatever, except…this time, it felt more real. Now that I had met him, it felt more…like I really was jealous.

But I had my reasons. Rob and this blonde actress-who was supposed to have died her hair dark brown for the film, but didn't because…well, I don't know-were like so close apparently. And according to 'close sources', he was supposed to have even asked her out.

Lucky bitch.

And this was why I could never accept the way that Rob felt about me. There would always be that confusion and that jealousy towards other actresses and such, and that wasn't the only reason either.

For years, I had tried so hard to get over my feelings for him. It had taken forever, but I was finally starting to get somewhere, because the way that I felt wasn't right. It wasn't normal by any standards.

And no, it definitely wasn't because he was Edward Cullen, or Cedric Diggory. It was because he was _himself_. He was Rob Pattinson, and it was him; that I was trying and failing to get over right now.

Years of working so hard had gone down the drain as soon as I had met him, and now, I was stuck between what was right and what was wrong and I couldn't yet know what decision to make right now…

…and I was still watching Rob Pattinson, on the big screen, undressing some blonde. I had to run, and now.

I got up from the chair, and walked out, because if I hadn't…well, I think my head might have quite possibly exploded otherwise. Why did I have to be the mad one out of the family? I mean, why couldn't I get over him, for fuck sake!

He was a celebrity, and all my family had convinced themselves that it was just a stupid crush; obviously, they were fucking wrong. It was a hell of a lot more than that, and completely stupid in every single fucking way.

''Charlie, wait.'' I heard Nick say behind me. I rubbed away the stupid tears that had fallen from my eyes to my cheeks, and walked out of the cinema doors, and sitting on the steps to calm down enough.

Nick sat down next to me, shooting me a confused look for how I had reacted. He had every right to though, didn't he? You didn't just storm out of a cinema showing whilst the show you the person that you look up to.

But it had gotten more than someone who I looked up to. I was in love with him, despite everything that I tried to do to not be. I had to go and be the mad one, and why deny it, when it was him that I wanted?

''Are you…okay?'' Nick asked me unsure, probably confused to why I had run off like that. I wondered if maybe he had just presumed that it was because I felt awkward about seeing that in front of us.

I hoped it was that, rather than why it was the real reason.

''Ur…yeah. Sorry for…rushing out like that. It's a very…awkward film.'' I lied, hoping that he would believe me. He did.

He chuckled awkwardly besides me. ''Yeah er…it is that.'' He agreed with me awkwardly, probably because that's the way that he felt.

He took his hand in mine, and sat himself closer. He confused me though, as he put his arm around me. I looked round at him confused, to see…uh oh. Now this was a decision which was bound to be even more awkward than the movie we had just seen.

Did I let him kiss me….or did, I not? With the way that I was feeling right now, it should be a definite no, but…well, maybe I should. I mean, it might take my mind off of Rob. Maybe this was what I needed.

Nick watched me for any sign of me wanting him not to do this, but right now…well, I did want him to do this. I wanted him to kiss me, t make me forget about Rob. I wanted this, I knew that I did.

He watched my face the whole time that he moved forward, and I kept my gaze on him as he closed the distance between us. I moved forward myself, wanting this now. I was sure about this. Because I was sure about Nick.

He pressed his lips to mine gently, closing his eyes as soon as he had. He kissed me softly…once, waiting for me to react, and make the next move. I closed my eyes, and wrapped my arms around his neck, pressing his face more securely to mine.

I kissed him back, using less gentleness as to how he was kissing me. I needed him to make me forget, I needed him to make me forget everything about Rob, and just about him. I wanted that…more than anything.

His hands skimmed my sides, making me shiver-slightly in shock at first-right up until he took my face in his hands, securing my face better to his. I sighed happily against his lips in response, forgetting my own name as Nick took my bottom lip in between his teeth.

This kiss was going on and on, but I never wanted it to end. I never wanted him to stop kissing me again, if I could actually help it. It felt too good, with his hands on my face, his kiss turning more and more urgent as I kissed him back.

But eventually he pulled back and away from me, grinning at me in delight as he did. ''That was er…-''

''-Nice.'' I finished for him, grinning back as I caught my racing breathe. He laughed breathlessly in response, and nodded his head in agreement.

''Oh yeah, it was definitely that, but its just that er…well, I thought that maybe you were going off of me.'' He admitted sheepishly. He huffed, and carried on. ''I usually put Girls off by the fifth date, so you could see why I was worried.''

I laughed in response. ''You have nothing to worry about. I like you, a lot.'' I admitted, because that was true. He grinned in response, happy now.

''I'm glad, because I feel the same.'' He admitted, grinning still.

We got up from the steps then, and started to walk home hand in hand, which gave me some thought about what had just happened. Whilst Nick kissed me, I kinda had forgotten about Rob…I forgot about my own name, so…surely, this was a good thing now…right?

***


	24. Talk

I walked into the house, still grinning as I thought about my date with Nick, and how well it had gone. I walked into the kitchen, to find it empty, but the back door still open. I walked out of the door, to find Rob sat on the outdoor sofa, having a cigarette.

I grinned back at him, sitting down next to Rob, and getting out of one of my own cigarettes. ''How was your date then?'' Rob asked me curiously, sounding as though he really wanted to know for once. I was glad about that.

''It was…okay. But the film was rubbish.'' I joked, even though it was really; having to watch Rob kiss someone else. My god…it had made me feel so jealous that it was unbelievable to feel that way.

''What film did you see?'' He asked me curiously.

I grinned at him, as I replied. ''Lost Summer.'' I replied. He laughed in response, rolling his eyes at me.

''Perfect for a second date, of course.'' He joked, making me laugh too. And then I remembered that he wanted to take me out.

''So…where were you planning to take me?'' I asked Rob curiously, as we did have all afternoon still, and I wanted to spend the rest of the day with him, but…then was it too dangerous to go out together, what with the paparazzi?

''Well, I was planning to take you to a theme park…if you wanted to. It's a local park, in L.A.'' He admitted honestly, instead of keeping it a surprise, which I preferred. I smiled in response, liking that idea.

''That sounds like a cool idea. I'd like that.'' I admitted, because it was true. He nodded, and quickly looked down again, seeming embarrassed about something or other. ''What's wrong?'' I asked him, confused.

''Well…don't laugh, but…'' he started, before looking back up and at me. ''I'll have to go in disguise.'' He admitted, making me laugh in response.

''I'll just have to wear a hoodie or whatever, but…I'll have to keep my head down.'' He admitted, sighing heavily.

I giggled in response. ''Doesn't matter, at least we'll be together.'' I saw him flash me a small look in the corner of his eyes in response, so I quickly added; ''I mean…well, you know. I like spending time with you.'' I admitted, because it was true.

''Well…we should get going then…I mean, all the cool rides are opening around about now, and the queues will be huge, and the less attention on me, the better.'' He confirmed, making me laugh in response.

''Bless you, you really hate attention, don't you?'' I asked him, even though I had enough knowledge to know that he did. I followed him into the house, and laced my arm with his, as we walked through the house.

But it seemed that he definitely didn't expect me to do that, especially with how shocked he looked as he looked down at our laced arms. I looked from him to our arms, wondering if doing this had been a right decision.

''Urm…'' I trailed off, not sure what I should say. I mean, clearly he didn't mind my arm being linked with his, because he hadn't moved away yet. And touching him like this…it definitely felt pleasant.

''I just thought that maybe we could…walk to the theme park…arm in arm?'' I asked him hesitantly, as we got to the front door. He sighed, and pulled his arm away from mine, and I gulped in response; getting myself ready to hear whatever reason that he decided to pull away from me for.

''I'd like that…as friends.'' He admitted, watching my face as the delighted grin spread across my face as I tried not to blush in response. ''But…there's paparazzi everywhere, and I think that it will be likely for them to find me.'' He admitted sadly.

I felt stupid now, because it was completely obvious when he put it like that. ''Oh…'' I replied, trailing off, and feeling my cheeks warm up with my usual red blush. ''Sorry, I didn't think about the paparazzi.'' I admitted, feeling so stupid now.

''Its okay…I'd have liked it if we could have.'' Rob admitted, holding his hand out, making me confused. I watched him as he took my hand in his, trying not to hyperventilate as he held my hand up to his face, and gently kissed the back of my hand.

Oh my freaking god…

I knew that I should be feeling guilty right now, and that I should have pulled away from him, but there was nothing that I wanted more in that moment to wrap my arms around him, and…well, do something I regret.

God damn him, why did he have to be so adorably cute all the time? And didn't he know that the way he acted now was only making it more awkward for me? And why couldn't I control myself after I had made a bloody decision for?

''Maybe another time.'' Rob whispered in a hopeful voice, gazing at me as he lowered my hand back down, and gave me time to catch my breathe back, after I was hyperventilating and had so badly wanted to….

Never mind. ''Maybe.'' I agreed breathlessly, stepping away from him, and about to open the door, when his hand slipped back into mine; stopping me from going anywhere. I sighed in response, because he had promised to be good.

''Rob…you promised to be my friend…please…can we just leave it like that?'' I begged him, because my head was already raging with the various feelings that I was feeling right now, what with Nick involved too.

''If you want.'' Rob replied, his hand still in mine, as he gave me time to choose what I _wanted_. As if it wasn't obvious as it was already. He knew what I wanted, that's why he was making this so hard.

''It's what I _need_.'' I told him, because it was true. I just hoped he would understand my choice for that. ''Please just give me that.'' I begged him, trying not to cry because…well…it wasn't possible for another person to feel what I felt for Rob.

''Okay.'' He sighed, giving in, and pulled his hand away from mine, letting me walk out of the front door. I gasped in a deep needed breathe, swallowing back my sobs as I stormed out of the house as quickly as I could, so that I could get some air to me, to think properly.

''Charlie, wait…I'm sorry.'' Rob apologized from behind me. I sighed, and drew out a cigarette, lighting up quickly, because I was stressed, and I needed a cigarette. Now. Before I totally went insane.

He caught up with me, standing next to me at the gate, with his hood pulled up over his head now, so that you couldn't see his hair. I had to admit…he did look quite different. With his messy hair covered, he kinda looked…normal, almost.

Not that he wasn't normal anyway. Its just…well, his looks were on somewhat of a sex god's appearance, but with his hood pulled over his head…I almost felt like I was brave enough to resist him. If only he could wear a hoodie all the time.

''I'm sorry. I cant seem to help myself when I'm around you.'' He admitted sheepishly, shrugging as he talked. I huffed in response, breathing in a long inhale of my cigarette. How did he think that I felt?

''Right, and have you actually thought about how I feel?'' I demanded, trying not to be angry with him. For one thing, I felt so badly guilty when I was angry with him, because of how I had desperately wanted to meet him for years.

Years of longing for him was crazy, but still true. I couldn't resist anything about Rob, even if I tried. So, the more that he did this, the more that I would end up giving in time to him, and hurting Nick.

''Why do you think I'm trying to tell you how I feel? Because I know that you feel the same about me, but yet, you wont believe it yourself.'' He replied smugly; smugly, because he was sadly right about what he was talking about.

''Because there's nothing to believe, I want to be your friend, that's all.'' I warned him, turning my back to try and go back into the garden and inside, because I needed to get away from him, because he was stressing me out.

''You know that we both don't believe that. You feel exactly the same about me, and I'm fed-up of watching you go on these dates with Nick, acting like you're so in to him.'' Rob reached out and stopped me; catching my arm in his hand.

''Because I am into him!'' I shouted in fury, wishing that he would just let me go. It was driving me mad, feeling like this about him, and I didn't get why he couldn't understand why he couldn't just leave me be.

''No you're not! You're faking it, I can tell. Even when Nick was here this morning, you were too busy looking around for me. I saw you, Charlie.'' I was about to complain, getting myself ready to, before I could cry, but he carried on speaking.

''What I don't get is why you're still denying what is right in front of you? I mean…do you hate me that much-''

''-Don't be stupid.'' I interrupted him.

''Then what is it? Because obviously something is stopping you from returning your feelings, which are still completely obvious, if you ask me.'' He complained, because it was true. I knew what my reasons were.

He was right; there were reasons for me holding myself back, but I wasn't going to tell them these reasons. Even just thinking about it now, it brought back tears to my eyes as why I couldn't let myself be happy.

''I just…I just cant. Just please…just please leave me alone.'' I begged him, before snatching my arm back, and running back into the house again as quickly as I could. Rob was through the door before I could shut it though, so I raced up the stairs to try and get away from him.

I raced to my bedroom, ignoring him trying to call for me, as I started to cry uncontrollably. How could I ever move on when I was still like this at just the mere thought of him? It tore me apart whenever I thought about it.

And it wasn't just because of him that was tearing me up, it was everything, literally. I had adored Rob for far too long, and I had convinced myself that this was never going to happen. I had convinced myself that I wouldn't even meet him.

So what was I to do when struggling and not dealing with my feelings for him was the only way that I could deal with it?

''I haven't finished talking to you.'' Rob stood in front of my bedroom door, stopping me from getting into my room, as tears escaped freely from my eyes. I wiped my tears away, and took a deep breathe to calm myself.

''Please…leave me alone.'' I begged him, because I didn't want to tell him anything about what had happened with my first and only Boyfriend, or even about why I could only hold back from him.

''Talk to me…please. I'm sorry if I've ruined your day…or made you cry…again, but just…talk to me.'' He begged, stepping closer to me. He raised his hands and gently wiped away a tear from my cheek.

''I promise you that I wont harass you about us anymore, as long as you do something for me.'' He promised me, making me confused. ''As long as you talk to me, tell me what's wrong…and now.''

I cried again then, unable to stop myself, even though I didn't understand why I had actually been crying so much for, and he sat me on my bed, sitting next to me, and letting me cry until I was ready to talk to him.

Once I was quiet, he got me to talk, which…in some ways was good. I knew exactly what had been bothering me; it had bothered me for years. One thing was my Ex, John. He had hurt me so bad in so many ways, and so many times.

I had trusted him, loved him, and wanted him, and all I got was crap, and lies back. He had been a total waste of time, and he had broken my heart into a million pieces, which had stayed with me still.

Second was, the fact that I was quite possibly the most low confidence person that you could ever meet, and I still was.

And third, was the fact that I was still in denial about the way that Rob felt about me, and I still believed that doing the right thing for everyone else was the best thing.

And then there was Nick, who I still couldn't deny who I was attracted to, especially after we had kissed today. And I told Rob about the kiss too, because it was about time that I started being honest about the things upsetting _me_ for once, not anyone else.

''I cant believe it about your ex…you know that you're too good for him, right?'' Rob told me gently, as he squeezed my hands in his. ''And you should just think…things are working out with Nick too, so that's something…and you have me as a friend too. I promise you that I wont pressurize you anymore.'' Rob promised me sweetly.

''You're too good to me, you know. You're the bestest friend that I could ask for.''

''I'll try.'' He admitted, laughing it off.

We may have sorted this out however, thanks to my crying…again, but we still had a lot of things to sort out between each other, I knew that much.

***


	25. Picking The One

''EVERYONE, WAKE UP!'' I groaned in response to Rachael's loud shouting, waking me up from my sleep. God, didn't she know that it was still only just nine am in the fucking morning? God!

''EVERYBODY, WAKE UP NOW!'' She shouted again. I growled in response, and got myself up, throwing my spare pillow at the door in fury. I was too tired, especially after I had been out drinking the night before with Rob and the gang.

I had been dating Nick for the last two weeks now, and things were actually going well. Rob still meant a hell of a lot to me, and there was still that kinda…awkwardness between us, but…we were still best friends.

I had been on six dates with Nick now, and he meant a hell of a lot to me, more-so than when I had first met him. He was sweet, and kind, and so understanding, and he was so funny when he got embarrassed, bless him.

''Don't throw your pillow at the door, darling; its no good venting your hangover at me.'' Rachael warned me, making me huff in response. I didn't have a hangover, but it was bloody annoying when I got woke up early after spending the night out…thanks to Rach.

''EVERYONE…TASHA'S BACK!'' I gasped in shock as soon as Rachael had said it, and got up from the bed as soon as she had said the words.

''Oh my god…'' I shouted happily, throwing my nightgown round me, and running down the stairs to go and see her. She was in the kitchen, and I grinned back at her as soon as I saw her. Kirsty was already up, hugging Tasha.

''Tasha!'' I shouted happily, hugging her. She laughed in response, and I pulled away to grin at her. ''Oh my god…thank god you're back. I'll have to tell you all the gossip that's been going on here, but first…well first, you need to tell me what's been happening in England.'' I confirmed, making her laugh in response.

We spent the whole day talking about what she had done in England, and that took almost all the day up.

It was five by the time that we started drinking, and I couldn't wait for Rob to get back here, because I was very much enjoying his company lately. He was being a really good friend, and he meant a lot to me.

But-because there was always a _but_-I still felt exactly the same as day one, and it was getting harder and harder to deny those blossoming feelings, which were getting worse and worse rather than better.

I put on a daring, strapless, blue dress, with a small, blue rose at the top, and I put on some blue high heels to match the dress. I walked downstairs, to see that Rob was already here. He grinned up at me, and I smiled back, glad that he was here.

He was wearing a loose, white shirt with some of the buttons undone, and black suit and trousers. He looked so beautiful, with his hair a wild mess, and god…the relief and feelings that came over me because of him, was very overwhelming.

''I'm so glad that you're here.'' I admitted, hugging him like how I always did when I saw him. I was always so overwhelmed when he was around again, because the truth was…well…I ended up really missing him.

''Well, I missed you too, twilight bud.'' He admitted, pulling away slightly to look at me, but still holding me in his arms. His face was so close to mine now. ''More than you'll know.'' He added, gazing at me.

I watched him back…slightly in shock about how he was looking at me now. He had never…never looked at me like that before. Like…well…I could only describe it like…he wanted me, _almost_.

I kept his gaze with mine, watching him as his eyes took in my features, right down to…my lips. My heart sped up as he pressed his hands tighter to the sides of my body, as he watched me closely.

''Well, look at you two then.'' We jumped away from each other as soon as we heard Rachael's voice. She grinned at us, as she walked into the kitchen to get a drink, and I turned back round to look at Rob.

''I think tonight will be a fun night, don't you?'' He asked me, still holding his gaze with mine. His gaze was beyond intense, to say the least.

''Definitely.'' I agreed, smiling back at him happily. We walked into the garden where everyone else was and started drinking then, and it didn't take me too long to get drunk, like how I knew that it wouldn't.

''Do you want to go inside? I want to talk to you for a minute.'' Rob asked me quietly. I nodded, and let him lead me into the house, and I followed him, giggling as I did. The alcohol was seriously affecting me.

He let my hand go as soon as we were in the living room, and the alcohol was really beginning to show as I almost fell onto the sofa.

I sipped my WKD quietly, watching Rob look at the picture frame hung up on the cabinet in the living room. It was of me and the Girls, taken in college a few years ago, when we were living in England. Oh, if only he saw the _drunk_ pictures. Those were cringe-worthy.

''You look like you're having fun…in the picture.'' He commented, sounding drunk slightly as he continued to drink his bottle of beer. I nodded, even though he had his back to me and couldn't see the movement.

''Yeah we were always having a laugh.'' I agreed because it was true. It was always such a laugh with the Girls at college. ''I was always the one behind; the one who constantly had to do her coursework again after giving it in two weeks late.'' I giggled as I thought about it, because it was true after all.

''Why is that?'' Rob asked me curiously, still keeping his eyes on the photo-frame that he had in his hands. Should I tell him why though? The only reason was I loved writing stories. Stories mostly about him.

''Well I…I er….write a lot of stories…back in England.'' I admitted, keeping it as simply as that as I drank back the remainder of my blue WKD and got up to get some more. I put loads of it in my glass, and went back to sit down on the sofa again.

''Cool…what kinda stories did you write?'' He asked me curiously, picking up another photo frame hanging up on the cabinet.

''_Oh you know, mostly about how I wanted you_.'' was something that I was going to keep in my brain. I thought hard of another answer for him, unable to stop myself wondering why he even wanted to know for.

I mean; I was nobody. We were friends, but there really was nothing interesting about me, compared to sex god himself. That was another thing that I wouldn't mistake calling him again, like how I did when I met him.

''Urm…a little bit like _twilight_,I guess. My friend Stacey said that she thought they it was even better than twilight.'' I huffed as I thought about that. Of course mine wasn't better than Stephanie Meyer's own version. It was impossible.

''Of course it wasn't, I think she was just trying to be nice.'' I added, laughing it off easily. I drank back my WKD as Rob turned back around and smiled at me, making my heart speed up again. I may still have Nick, and Rob may just be a friend of mine, but I couldn't deny the impossible attraction to him.

Especially as I was drunk. I mean I had fancied him since I was fifteen. And not due to the fact that he was Rob Pattinson, but because that was just how it was. I wasn't too sure how it started, but when I saw him in Harry Potter…whoa.

There was just something about him, something the way that he held himself. He was so shy, but when he was filming; his confidence took over, and he lost himself in his role. And he was of course as gorgeous as hell, and the fact that he played guitar and piano was just…wow. Oh my god…it just showed how talented this sex god was.

''What was it about?'' He asked me curiously. He took a seat next to me on the sofa, wrapping his arms around the back of me, and sending my heart into overdrive, and drank a sip of his bottle of beer.

I flushed bright red, and took a sip of my own WKD bottle and prepared myself to tell him about the story that he was bound to think was rubbish. I mean this was Rob Pattinson, so why should he be impressed with my shitty talent for writing?

''Well…it was about a Girl called Katie who's seventeen and moves back to live with her Dad after her Foster Mum wants to move around the country with her Boyfriend. Katie's Mum is dead after she died along with Katie's Sister's when Katie was ten.'' I explained, looking down at my hands so that I wouldn't have to see his expression.

He probably thought I was pathetic. ''But when Katie moves back to live with her Dad, she meets a family named The Malin's who is just Damian and Viola at first, and they move in with Katie and her Dad.'' I carried on talking while I still had the chance.

''The stories about The Malin's moving back and Katie finding out that they're Vampires and how she struggles to stay away from Damian, even after she knows what he is.'' I stayed silent then, waiting to hear laughter from him.

''I suppose it's a bit silly, but…well, I like it. Its intense, you know. Like er….how despite everything that tells her she should be staying away from him, because of who he was, because of how he could kill her…but she doesn't. Because she's that badly in love with him.'' It was true. When I put it like that, it sounded kinda sweet.

''Wow…it has a good storyline. I'd like to take a look at that sometime if you don't mind?'' Oh my god; did I heard him right?

I looked up at him in shock to see him smiling at me. Automatically, my heart went into overdrive at just a simple smile.

''Do you mean that?'' I asked Rob in shock. I expected him to say no, and that he thought it sounded crap, before laughing at me, but he didn't. He nodded his head, still smiling at me, but not in amusement.

''Yeah, it sounds really good. I'd love it if you sent me it, if you wanted to.''

''Urm…hell yes.'' I admitted, making him laugh. He drank back the rest of his beer, and I quickly looked away again. Because I knew that I'd only end up staring at him; it was a habit that I hadn't yet been able to stop.

''So where's Nick tonight?'' Rob asked me suddenly. I was in shock; he didn't usually ask about Nick. In fact he had never acted about Nick at all.

''Urm…at the studio. He had to rehearse for his gig tomorrow.'' I admitted, drinking another sip from my WKD bottle, and still feeling in shock about Rob asking about Nick. It wasn't something he did.

''He sings?'' Rob asked in surprise. I wasn't sure why; Nick was such a talented Guy, that it wouldn't surprise me if Nick really could sing.

''No he's a Dancer. He's in a venue tomorrow, dancing with a local band at Roxy Theatre.'' I admitted proudly. It was a big thing for Nick to get this gig, and I knew how much it meant to Nick.

Of course, Rob didn't have a clue about what Nick did for a living, because he hadn't taken an interest before. It didn't bother me, even though Rob made no effort to speak to Nick, like how everyone else did, but it didn't bother me.

The only thing that bugged me a little bit is how Nick got when he was here. He was always so sure that Rob hated him for some reason, even though Rob was just quieter than Kellan and the rest and kept out of Nick's way.

But because of how Nick felt, he kept out of the way of Rob, and ultimately this house as much as possible. It made me sad though, because we always spent most of the time around Nick's house, away from my Girls, just because of how Nick felt about Rob.

''Oh,'' Rob replied, unbothered by it. He kept silent for a moment, looking around the room as I tried to look at anything but him…and failed, before he added; ''Tasha mentioned you had a guitar. Do you sing?'' he asked me curiously; looking back to me and grinning.

I had to wonder what he found so fascinating in me. Whenever the subject turned back to me, he was instantly hooked. I didn't get it; there was nothing interesting about me to talk about. I flushed red in response of his curiosity.

''No, I just play guitar. But I've only been learning for a few months.'' I admitted. ''I can go and get my guitar for you if you want? It's in my bedroom.'' I asked him, getting up from the sofa and taking my bottle of WKD with me as I walked to the living room door.

''Well I'll come with you.'' Rob said, getting up from the sofa too. I blushed bright red again, looking at him as if he lost his mind. It was just that…well I didn't think that it was a very good idea; Rob coming to my bedroom with me.

Nothing would happen, no matter how drunk I got, because I had a Boyfriend. I had Nick to think of, and he meant the world to me. But it was just…weird having Rob Pattinson in your bedroom, especially as there was…er…that picture hanging up on the wall…of sex god.

''I don't think it's a good idea. No offence but not even Nick goes into my bedroom very much.'' He frowned in response, but I had convinced myself that that was just about me saying no, and not about Nick.

Whatever his reason for frowning, it had disappeared as soon as he got to my side, and at the living room door, and he was smiling at me again; taking my breathe away and sending my heart into overdrive…again.

That chemistry was back again, pulling me back towards him, like a drug, like how it had when I was sat down next to him on the sofa. That undeniable chemistry pulling me closer to him, daring me to be closer to him. I shrugged it off though as usual; I had Nick to think of.

''Well how about you grab your guitar, and I'll stay outside.'' He suggested, which sounded better.

''Urm…okay.'' I agreed unsure, letting him follow me up the stairs. I had a bad feeling about this, but I wasn't too sure why that was. I kept drinking from my bottle of WKD bottle, feeling so badly drunk but not at all bothered by that fact.

We reached the outside of my bedroom, and I turned back to look at Rob, to see him drinking from his bottle of beer. He smiled at me, and I couldn't help but blush and giggle in response. He had such a cheeky smile sometimes.

I ducked my face, and looked down at my hands as I started to speak. ''My guitar should be in there, but my bedroom's so messy, I'll probably have to move everything.'' I admitted, still blushing bright red and laughing awkwardly.

''Uh hum…well I wouldn't mind.'' I saw Rob move closer to me in the corner of my eyes, and my eyes instantly diverted back to his face, wide with shock. He smiled at me, slightly unsure, before taking my hand in his.

I knew that I needed to pull away, and now. It felt too good…to be like this with him. When his hand touched mine, I felt a sharp, intense electricity in my hand from where he touched me. His hand loosely in mine, his feet moving closer towards me…

He watched me for any sign of doubt and I knew that despite me wanting to move away, he wouldn't see any sign of discomfort. And I got proof of that when he gently removed his hand from mine, and rested it on the side of my face.

''Charlie,'' he whispered, with me frozen to the floor. He stepped closer, and took my face in his hands, making me start to panic. This was actually going to happen, I could feel it, and yet the last thing that I wanted to do was pull away from him. I couldn't.

He hesitated for a whole second, looking as though he was thinking over in his head about what was right and wrong, before his lips came down on mine. They were so soft against my own, moving slowly for any sign of a reaction from me.

He, of course got one. There was no way that I could refuse him now. Not now that his lips were on mine, now that he was kissing me. It was all too much; I could almost taste him against my lips, and I needed more.

That electricity that was always shared between us and our small touches, had ignited into a real spark, and it was too tempting to say no to now. I couldn't get enough of the smoldering fire burning in our lips, as we kissed.

I couldn't get over how good it felt having his lips pressed against mine. That sizzling, deep electricity that had been there when we held hands was right here in this kiss, a thousand times more deeper and intense.

I thrust my hands into the back of his hair, with my bottle of WKD on the floor as I pushed his face more securely to mine as I kissed him back furiously; my urgent lips spurring him on. He kissed me back with the same force, before he pushed me lightly against the wall behind me, his body pressed against mine.

I hesitated for a whole second, before taking his lower lip between my teeth, and gently sucking on the skin there, before biting down gently. He moaned against my lips in response and my tongue gently traced his bottom lip; taking in the amazing flavour of him.

He tasted like cigarettes, alcohol, mints, and a stunning flavour which I wasn't too sure what was. I didn't care though, because I was so caught up in this moment, that all coherent thought was through the window. It has been like that as soon as Rob pressed his lips to mine and was going to stay like that until this kiss finished.

He parted his lips for me, letting me deepen our kiss if I wanted to, but I wasn't sure. This was actually Rob Pattinson, and I was actually making out with him! I wasn't even sure whether I was kissing him right, but I was going to go with it for as long as possible.

I felt his tongue gently prod my closed mouth, asking for entrance. I parted my lips instinctively, unable to stop myself. I wanted this as much as he appeared to want it.

His hands loosed from my face as our kiss got more and more eager and intense, and he ran his hands down the side of my body, earning a shiver of delight from me in response. He pressed his hands eagerly into the sides of my dress, and pushed me harder against him, so that I could feel absolutely _all_ of him.

I moaned in response, my hands pressing deeper into his hair as our kiss got more and more heated; our tongues still dancing together as we continued our deepening kiss. He pulled away then though, sending a shock through my body, but the next words were ones that I was dying to hear.

''Can we go into your bedroom now?''

''Uh huh.'' I replied, crashing my lips back against his, hard. Despite the wrongness of it all, and the fact that I had a Rob Pattinson picture hanging up on my wall, I wanted this kiss to go on for as long as I could make it.

We fell into my bedroom door as I turned the door handle and we fell lightly into my room, with the bedroom door crashing back into the wall. I kicked the door back closed somehow, as we continued to kiss, and stumbled for the bed.

I finally released my hands from his hair and gently trailed his soft skin before leaving it on his shoulder, and starting to help him with his jacket. We fell onto the bed lightly, and he pulled away to throw his suit on the floor.

His lips were already on mine, urgent and needy even though we were both gasping for breathe by now. I didn't care though, and my hands were already tightened into the back of his hair, gently pulling and smoothing out again between my fingers.

I knew that it was wrong, especially with how this was going, but I was drunk, and although that was no excuse, I had fancied Rob for years, even though I hadn't met him then. I gasped as a knock interrupted our heated making out.

''Ur…Charlie?'' Kirsty's voice called through the door unsure. Rob pulled away from me, his body still gently resting on top of mine as he gazed at me with half-opened lids. I shivered in response, trying to stay focused.

''Yeah?'' I called back, sounding slightly breathless. I blushed in response, clearing my throat after I finished speaking. Rob climbed off of me, gaining his own breathe back as he laid down next to me on my bed, looking away.

''Are you coming downstairs? We're getting more drinks in.'' She confirmed, laughing quietly. She sounded drunk already.

''Ur yeah…I'll be down in a minute.'' I called back, trying to be quiet. It didn't help that my heart was racing three hundred miles an hour in my chest. My heart was beating like mad, and it wasn't just because of our kiss. It was because I felt so badly guilty too.

''Okay, I'll just be downstairs.'' She called back, and I listened as I heard her small footsteps heading down the stairs. I laid still, wondering what I should say to Rob now, who was still laying next to me on the bed.

I couldn't barely move; my hands were shaking like hell, my heart racing in my chest, with fear panicking my every thought. My whole body was shaking so bad due to the fear that I felt about if we had actually gotten caught.

I deserved to get caught after the way that I had kissed Rob, especially as I was supposed to be with Nick too. I was so badly in the wrong that I didn't deserve any pity and I definitely didn't deserve Nick now.

Rob got up from the bed silently, and pulled on his black suit from the floor, before turning back to look at me with a heavy sigh. He had a look of desperation in his eyes as he begged me for what I knew that he wanted.

Answers, and me to choose, finally.

''I was in the wrong. For kissing you. I will apologize for that, because it's the right thing to do, but…'' he trailed off, and I gave myself time to listen to what I knew he was going to say already. I knew it.

''But…I want you to choose. Between me and Nick, and I mean properly. I'm sorry, but…I cant be your friend anymore, its not enough. If you choose Nick then…I'll probably go back to London for a while, to sort my head out.'' He admitted.

''So…you don't even want to be my friend anymore? If I choose Nick?'' I asked him in shock. Didn't he know how much that hurt when he said it to me like that? It was killing me, when he put it like that.

''I'm sorry, but…no. I don't think that me being your friend will be a good idea, what with everything that happens between us. I'm sorry, but…that's the way I feel.'' He admitted, apologizing.

I nodded, still trying to take this all in. It made sense though, given how he had felt for weeks on end. I deserved this.

''Okay…that's fair.'' I promised him, watching him head to the door. I couldn't even cry anymore, because I had cried so much about this before. I watched Rob as he turned back round and smiled apologetically at me.

''I still really like you Charlie, but I cant take anymore. I'm done with trying to make myself believe that friends is enough for me, when we both know that it isn't. I want you, but I'll understand if you pick Nick.'' He spelled it out for me.

''I'll…give you a few days space to think about things.'' He added, before he walked out of my bedroom door. I breathed out then, not even realizing that I had been holding my breathe before then.

I thought about what I had to do, and how little time I had to think about things. It wasn't his fault…it was about time that someone told me what I had to hear, not what I needed to hear. And now, I was going to have to make a decision, no matter how difficult it would be.

***


	26. Rob's Choice

I glanced across at Rob again, and instantly wished I didn't. He was watching me, still. It was just lucky that Nick wasn't here, especially with the way that Rob was looking at me. The last few days between me and Rob had been more than awkward.

Since he had given me the ultimatum, he had tried to stay away…I knew very well that he had. But…it was getting harder for not just him, but me to stay away from him too. And you could tell too.

He had gone clubbing with us, and tonight, he was getting drunk. But as I was still chewing on my decision, I was finding it more and more difficult to say no to Rob. I had seen Nick again in the last few days however, on our seventh date.

But, he didn't know what I was thinking about; that I was chewing on my decision to be with either Rob or Nick. It was a decision that I still hadn't made my mind up on yet. It was too difficult to choose.

I watched as Rob drank the remainder of his sixth beer in an hour. He kept his gaze on mine, as he got up to go to the bar to get another beer. ''God…Rob is downing them a bit eagerly tonight, isn't he?'' Rachael asked me in shock.

I nodded in agreement, knowing that I had to do something, and now. We may have been ignoring each other, but I wasn't letting him drown his sorrows all night. I cared about him, more than anyone I had ever cared about before.

He didn't even realize how hard it was for me to watch him, sitting there, wallowing and drowning his sorrows. It actually killed me, because I knew that I was to blame for everything. I couldn't take anymore.

''You're right. I'll go and have a word.'' I promised her, getting up from the table that we were sat on. She nodded, and watched me walk over there, to the bar. I took a deep breathe, and sat on the bar stool next to him.

''Drowning your sorrows isn't going to help anyone.'' I warned him, because it was true. I cleared my throat first, so that he knew that I was here. He swung lightly from his bar stool, and turned to look at me in confusion.

''It will help me.'' He replied unbothered, sighing heavily as he waited for his beer to be served to him. I knew that he didn't mean to sound so cold…well, at least I didn't think that he did anyway. I hoped that it was just because he was drunk.

''How is it going to help, Rob?'' I asked him, unable to stop myself feeling a bit angry with him now. ''Besides the fact that you'll have a lovely head-splitting hangover in the morning?'' I demanded angrily.

''You don't care about me remember. Or at least you're not supposed to.'' He replied drunkenly. I huffed in response, feeling absolutely furious now. If he wanted to be like that then…well, what was the point?

''Fine, well you know what…next time, I wont bother trying to look out for you!'' I shouted at him angrily, before walking off to sit back down. Luckily, everyone was dancing and couldn't see, which gave me time to wipe my tears away.

''Charlie.'' I huffed and turned away as Rob sat down next to me. didn't he realize that I didn't want to speak to him after he had been so rude to me, like that? No, clearly he didn't understand, as usual.

''I wanted to know…if you made a decision about what I asked the other day.'' He admitted, making me huff at him again in response. How he had the cheek to ask me that after he had been so rude to me, a minute ago, I didn't know!

''Why should I have made a decision after the way you spoke to me a minute ago?'' I demanded, whilst he nodded his head in response. ''You're really hurting me, you know that.'' I added, before going quiet again as I dried away my tears.

''I'm sorry.''

I huffed. ''I shouldn't have to accept your apology anymore. You're always apologizing, and nothing changes.'' I warned him-because-despite how much I still cared and loved him-it was true.

''I know, but…don't you understand why I'm frustrated for?'' Rob asked me, getting my attention again, straight away. ''I'm falling for you Charlie…big time, and all you're doing is…well, dating someone else.'' He sighed heavily. It was true, even though he didn't want to admit that I actually cared a lot about Nick.

''Look, I know, but…I still care deeply about Nick…I think that it will be better if we were just friends.'' I admitted, hoping that he would understand my decision in saying this to him. I still cared about him.

He turned to look at me with wide, shocked eyes, telling me that he definitely didn't expect my choice. I sighed heavily in response, and got myself to explain about why I had made the decision that I had.

''Look, you still mean a lot to me, but…I want to be with Nick.'' I admitted, trying to take his hand in mine. He pulled himself away from me, and got up from the chair. I watched, hoping he wouldn't leave yet; we needed to talk about this, at least.

''Fine. Do you know what, that's…well…fine then. Obviously you've er…made your mind up already.'' Rob spat back angrily, making me sigh in response. I knew that he was angry, but I wanted to talk about this.

I wanted us to talk about it together so that we could at least be friends or something together. It would mean a hell of a lot to me, if he could do that for me. ''I still care for you, more than anyone else; its just…well, I just want to be your friend-''

''-I don't care. I don't want to be just your friend Charlie, I told you before!'' He shouted at me, making me confused. What did he expect me to do then? ''I don't want to be your friend anymore Charlie…I just…I…well I er…I just don't want to hear anything anymore.''

And with that…he stormed out of the club. My heart actually broke. I sobbed, and my legs gave way underneath me. I sat down on the sofa, putting my face in my hands, and crying. There was no way that I could back my tears any longer.

''Charlie, are you alright?'' Rachael put her arms around me then, comforting me as I cried over Rob, and how I had lost my very best friend. He meant a lot to me, and now we couldn't even be friends still, anymore.

***


	27. Sulker

Despite how things had ended with me and Rob, I was still going clubbing a few days later, with Nick, as he wanted to go out with the rest of the gang…however, Rob was coming too. But I was ignoring him, despite how hard it would be for me.

I was fed-up of crying over him all the time even though I missed his company, his laughter…just everything about him. It would be difficult, but he had said it himself; that he didn't want to know me.

I just hoped that it was maybe only about him being angry, because that was all I had to hope. I still very much wanted to be his friend. I missed his company so much, and it only got worse as he came round to the house.

I made my excuse to go upstairs to go and get changed into my dress, ready for the club tonight, which I had brought especially to impress Nick, admittedly, even though it definitely wasn't my thing.

For clubbing tonight, I put on a purple dress, which was kinda tight, but looked really pretty on. Around the middle of the dress was a black belt, which looked really pretty on, even if it was a bit tight around me.

I reminded myself that that was how it was supposed to look, and that I was wearing it to impress Nick too, and I walked downstairs, with my new silver shoes on, to see everyone sat in the living room, ready to go clubbing.

I smiled at Rachael, feeling Rob's eyes on me as I took a seat on the sofa, trying to ignore him, whilst I text Nick, to ask where he was. He was supposed to be meeting us at the house, before we went clubbing first.

''You look really nice, Charlie.'' Rachael smiled at me, taking in my dress. It wasn't something that I'd usually wear, so she was probably just as surprised as everyone else with my choice of wearing it.

''Thanks…I thought that I'd wear something different for a change.'' I replied, a little unsure with my choice now, as I looked down at myself; a little shyly. It wasn't really like me at all, to wear something so glitzy, and short too.

''I think it looks really nice, darling. And you know that I always tell the truth.'' Rachael promised me, making me laugh. She drank her WKD back, and I looked down at myself again, pursing my lips as I felt eyes staring into me again.

I only had to guess who's eyes they belonged to.

''So who are we waiting for?'' I heard Tasha ask unsure, trying to break the silence, it seemed, as nobody else was talking. I looked up to see Tasha looking around, confused.

''Nick.'' I replied, trying to ignore the urge to look at Rob and make sure that he was okay with that. I could understand if he felt some upset about me deciding to bring Nick, but then he was also still my Boyfriend too.

And two, small knocks at the door told me that that was probably him now. I grinned, and got up from my chair, trying not to run in my eagerness, because I would probably fall over and break my neck.

That was just my kinda style. I flashed a quick look at Rob, to see him frowning sadly as I walked out of the living room eagerly. I sighed, wishing that he would understand that I just needed to be friends with him, even if it wasn't what I actually _wanted_ right at the minute. It was what I needed really.

I pulled open the door eagerly, and grinned at Nick. ''Hey you.'' I grinned at him, pleased to see him. He was wearing a smart black suit, which was opened, revealing his smart, white shirt, that has a few buttons undone.

He was wearing casual jeans too, which was strange, because…well, this was more something that I would find on Rob, rather than Nick. His curled hair was straightened tonight, and all spiked up, which made him look incredibly beautiful.

Nick grinned back, stepping closer, and into the door. ''Well hello to you too. You absolutely beautiful, stunning even.'' Nick admitted, wrapped his arms around me and pressed his lips to mine.

I smiled against his lips, kissing him back with the same softness that he always used with me. I wrapped my hands around his neck, not touching his perfect hair this time, because I didn't actually want to mess it up.

He looked amazing with straight hair, and I didn't want to ruin his style with my fumbling hands. His lips gently moved across mine, ghosting him as he leaned on the front door, after he shut it closed.

He pulled away too soon though, and smiled at me as I caught my breathe. ''I think…that if we spend anymore time out here…the Girls wont be happy. They're all ready to go out. But you look very beautiful too, by the way. I love the hair.'' I added, spelling it out for him.

He nodded, and grinned. ''Best lead me into the living room then.'' He replied, letting me lead him more into the hallway, and into the living room. I laughed, and turned to grin at Tasha, after she smiled at me, happy to see me with Nick.

I sat down on Nick's lap on the armchair, as we waited for the taxi to arrive, and I forced myself to look at Rob, because I could still feel his eyes on me. He was watching me, and underneath the poker-face that he was struggling to keep up; I could tell that he was upset about us.

I smiled apologetically at him, hoping that he would understand, and quickly looked away from him; because I couldn't stand to see the upset on his face. He didn't realize that he was hurting me with his pain, as-well as himself.

Rachael walked outside to get the front door, after somebody else knocked, and she came back into the living room, a minute later. ''Taxi's here.'' She confirmed, before grabbing her glass of WKD, and downing it in one.

I laughed in response, and got back up from the armchair with Nick, taking his hand in mine, as we followed Rachael, Jackson, Kellan and Tasha outside. Rob, Kirsty and Phil followed us out of the house, and we all got into a big taxi waiting outside for us.

I was sat in front of Rob, which gave me the perfect view to make me feel even more guilty in response to how upset that he looked. I looked away quickly; too chicken to take in what I had done, and looked out of the taxi window.

It only took about five minutes to get to the club, but it was silent between me, Nick, and Rob, whilst everyone else spoke. Nick was still pretty pissed off with the way that Rob looked at us, even though that I knew that Rob had even reason to look pissed off.

I just tried to tell Nick to leave it, but he wouldn't. He wanted to know what Rob's problem was, but I encouraged him to just leave it, as it wouldn't be worth it. Nick wasn't usually an angry person so to see it getting to him so much was a surprise.

I took Nick's hand and followed him out of the taxi, where he quickly got out before everyone else had the chance. I laughed at his eagerness, wondering what the rush was for. We had all night to drink.

''You in a rush there, lover-boy?'' I joked with Nick. He turned and grinned at me in response to that.

''Urm…hell yes. You are dancing with me tonight, lover-girl.'' He replied, making me giggle in response. I couldn't deny that I just adored my new nickname from him; I wouldn't mind if he called me that more often.

''I suppose that I'll just have to, wont I then?'' I forced myself to agree. ''I mean you show everyone else up with your dancing skills, so I'll just have to try and keep up with you.'' I added playfully, winking at him.

''Thanks…even though you dance just as-well as me…better even.'' Nick confirmed, trying to make me feel better. I huffed in response, just as everybody reached me and Nick, outside the club.

''Let's go then!'' Nick said excitedly, making Alice laugh this time as she lead us into her Brother's club. We were going to her Brother's club again, because that new club hadn't been that good last night.

Nick lead me to the bar in his excitement, almost dragging me along, bless him because he was so eager. I laughed in response, and he turned to grin at me. I looked back to the gang, to see Rob standing up.

As soon as I had looked at him, he kept his eyes on me; wondering what I was going to do next, now that I had spotted him looking. But I didn't have time to do anything, because Nick had already caught my face gently in his grip, and pressed his lips to mine to kiss me.

He pulled back and grinned at me, before looking back round at the bar. ''Yeah, can I get two Miami shots please?'' Nick asked the waitress serving, but my eyes were still on Rob's face, shocked now.

''I'm sorry.'' I mouthed, hoping that he would understand. He was close enough to see what I was saying to him. He just shook his head, and looked away now; looking really upset about tonight, bless him.

My heart ached, my head full of excuses for me going over there now and trying to make it up to Rob, even if it was just to hug him or whatever, but I knew that I couldn't. I sighed heavily, and turned back to the bar.

Nick passed me the shot, which was a strange but unique pulsing purple colour, which looked quite nice. I smiled at Nick, still failing miserably as I couldn't keep my eyes off of Rob, and drank my shot back in one.

Nick drank his back, but unlike me, who grimaced; his eyes just squinted a little bit in shock, making me smile. ''Right, shall we go and sit down with everyone then?'' Nick asked me, still grinning.

I looked back to the table, to see that Tasha was trying to talk to Rob, and their conversation didn't look a normal conversation. I had a feeling that they were talking about…what had been happening with us because Rob still looked stressed; in fact he looked more stressed than usual if that was possible.

''I don't think that's a good idea, Nick. I think Tasha's talking to Rob about something important, so we shouldn't disturb them.'' I warned him. It wasn't because I was scared that Nick would find out about me and Rob, even though that did give me something to think about.

It was because I was absolutely so wracked up in guilt. Rob looked absolutely heartbroken, and it was tearing me apart more and more. He looked worse than I actually felt, if that was actually possible.

''He looks okay,'' Nick shrugged, turning around and glancing at Rob. I glanced at Nick confused, wondering how he could miss the fact that Rob looked absolutely terrible; upset and annoyed.

It wasn't like Nick to sort-of…be so blind to someone looking upset because Nick was so caring, but then again, it was Rob. Nick and Rob hadn't talked to each other at all, due to the fact that; Rob disliked Nick for some reason, though I doubted that was because of me, and Nick disliked Rob back because Rob was quiet and didn't speak to Nick very much.

''Nick, he looks really cut up about me-I mean…he looks really cut up about er…something.'' I stuttered, after accidentally telling Nick a bit too much information. My heart sped up because of my lie, and Nick turned round, grinning at me, after he had noticed it.

I blushed bright red in response, and looked down at the floor; ignoring a heartbroken Rob, and a grinning Nick. I had to admit to being a little confused…why was Nick grinning at me for like how he had?

''Oh dear,'' I looked up and found Nick's eyes, feeling the confusion show on my expression as I continued watching him. ''You and Rob have had a fight, haven't you?'' He guessed in totally the wrong way.

But, I decided that it was probably easier to lie and say that me and Rob had had a fight, rather than Nick questioning about it all night. I nodded, and smiled, hating the fact that I had to lie about it.

''Yeah, we kinda…just fell out this afternoon. It was just a silly argument, but well er…I didn't expect him to be so upset about it.'' I admitted, hoping Nick would just leave it like that. Of course, I didn't think that he actually would.

''Well…we might not talk, but you should go and speak to him about it, if its both getting you down. You two are best friends…well, you were.'' He suggested, trying to be helpful. I smiled at him, shaking my head in response, quickly.

''No, that's okay. I think I'll just leave him to talk to Tasha for a while…anyway, we're still friends.'' I smiled at Nick, even though that wasn't actually true. It was too awkward between me and Rob to be anything close to friends, right now.

''Yeah, but…'' he trailed off, thinking of the best way to put it. I watched him confused, not too sure on what he was about to say next. ''Well…don't take this the wrong way, Charlie, but…'' he trailed off, again.

I watched him confused, wondering what he was trying to say. Had he guessed? No surely not…he couldn't have guessed…right?

''Well…the way that Rob looks at you…and not just sometimes, but all the time. You don't even notice it, anything that anyone does, you blush anyway.'' He said, making me laugh because it was true.

''But he…well, I don't know. Maybe, its just me, getting jealous, because…you mean a lot to me, but he just seems to be looking at you all the time, gazing at you.'' He admitted, making me shocked.

I hadn't actually thought about it the way that Nick did, and he was right; I blushed all the time, and I was blind usually to what was right in front of me, so…did that mean that I had been missing Rob's signals.

Had this been another reason why he was getting so frustrated with me for? I imagined that the answer to that was a definite yes, but I just wished that I knew how to sort this big mess out, between me, Nick, and Rob.

''Lets go and sit down at the table; everyone else is sat there.'' Nick asked me. ''And, if you want, I can leave you and Rob alone to talk, if you want?'' Nick suggested sweetly, making me smile. He was so considerate; way too considerate in-fact, bless him.

''Urm…I'd like that…'' I admitted, trailing off. ''But only if you don't mind? I mean, I know that you feel awkward about the way that you _think_ Rob looks at me-''

''-The way that I _know_ he looks at you.''

''Okay, okay.'' I tried to laugh it off, after Nick had interrupted me. ''But…I don't want you to feel like…you have to leave. Because I know that…well, I know you don't really speak to Rob, but…I don't want you to feel like you have to leave.'' I chatted on.

Nick laughed in response, the sound happy, thank god. ''Don't worry about it; I know that you have to do what you have to do. You two are friends, and if he's upset, then you are too. You don't seem to realize that whenever he's upset, it gets you down too.'' Nick told me, making me smile.

I hadn't realized how observant Nick actually was, and everything he said was all true, and correct. Which kinda worried me a little bit, with the awkwardness of what was going on with me and Rob.

We walked over to the table though, and I kept my eyes on Rob, hoping that he would look up in time to see us walking over, to give him time to realize that I was being forced over to sit with them.

Rob looked up then, and I smiled at him as we walked closer to the table; my hand still in Nick's. Rob frowned at us in response, and looked back down at the table, unhappily. I sighed in response, my heart aching for him.

I walked over to the table in time to hear Tasha finish talking to Rob. ''At the end of the day Rob, you two can still be friends. You mean a lot to Charlie, and I know what she's like; she'll want that.'' Tasha was saying to him, trying to comfort him.

He just sighed heavily, and forced one nod. I looked to Tasha, and smiled at her, and she smiled back in response. ''Tasha…Nick…can I talk to Rob on his own for a minute please?'' I asked them both, ignoring Rob when his eyes looked up, at me in shock.

It was no good sat there, moping like he was, if he wasn't even going to talk to me about it. We could still be friends maybe…eventually, after everything between us is sorted out. Nick nodded his head.

''Of course, I'm just going to the bathroom, for a minute.'' Nick agreed, heading to the bathroom. Tasha looked round at Rob to make sure that he was okay with this, but he looked at her, and shook his head.

''Charlie…'' Tasha started, but she didn't have to explain to me; I already guessed that Rob didn't want to talk to me.

''Just leave it Tasha. If he doesn't want to talk to me, then fine. But I'm not stepping on eggshells just because _he_ wont talk to _me_.'' I huffed at him angrily, and walked back over to the bar to get more shots; so that I could get drunk.

I didn't need him trying to make me feel even worse, because I felt fucking awful. What could I do if he wouldn't talk to me, and he sat there, moping about. I desperately wanted to talk to him, to try and make things better between us, but Rob didn't want to know.

I smiled at Alice, as I ordered a double shot of vodka in, making her raise her eyebrows in response. ''Determined to get drunk early, are we?'' She asked me, grinning at me. I nodded in response.

''Yes, thanks to sulker.'' I explained, nodding over my head to where Tasha and Rob was, to see that Rob had his face in between his hands; his eyes blurred because he was a bit drunk like me now.

I huffed in response, and turned back round to the bar, where the waiter had got me my double shots in. ''Well _sulker's _coming right over here now, so I think I'll leave you to it, okay?'' Alice asked me, grinning.

I nodded, sighing heavily in response. ''Yeah okay…two fucking guesses about what he wants.'' I mumbled, making her laugh in response. I downed my double shots of vodka, grimacing after, because they were so strong.

''I'm sorry.'' I tried not to smile as I heard Rob's voice, closer now. I could tell that he was standing next to me, and it was hard not to look round at him to see if he was okay. The relief that I felt from just his voice was unbelievable.

''No need to apologize.'' I promised him, even though he had kinda been acting immature; sulking like how he was, and ignoring me. But I wanted to get drunk tonight, and take my mind off of it. Everything was so complicated and out of control that I didn't possibly no how I was going to deal with everything tomorrow.

But tonight was for getting drunk, and taking my mind off of it. I had decided it after I had ordered my shot.

''I just…I wish things could be different.'' Rob admitted as I downed my vodka shot in one. I grimaced, before turning to him and smiling. I felt the exact same way, but…I had Nick. It couldn't be any different between us.

''I know. So do I, but…it just cant. Nick means a hell of a lot to me, and I'm not going to let you down anymore; I promise.'' I promised him, because it was true. He sighed heavily in response to that.

''You haven't let me down Charlie, I just wish that things could be different between us, that's all.'' He promised me. I smiled, thinking the exact same thing, but not letting him know that. I had Nick.

''Okay, well…I'm going to stay at the bar for a while, with Nick.'' I told him, because I thought that it would be better for Rob, if I did. Rob watched me confused, as if to ask why I was going to do that.

''If its about me, then don't feel like you have to.'' Rob promised me, looking a bit guilty about his behaviour before. Even though, there was nothing to feel guilty about. He didn't have to feel guilty about being upset.

''I know, but…I think we should.'' I replied, because I thought it was for the better, what with everything going on with us three right now. It wasn't right to make Rob sit there, while me and Nick act like…how we were.

''Well, just don't feel like _you_ have to, please.'' Rob replied, smiling at me, and sounding as though as he wanted just me there in the way that he empathized _you_. He walked away then, leaving me to think about that as Nick came back from the bathroom.

''Everything sorted?'' Nick asked me, as he took a seat at the bar, opposite me. I smiled sheepishly at him, and forced myself to shake my head. Because after all, everything was definitely not sorted out.

''Ur no, not quite. I think that it will be better if we stay here for a while…if that's okay. Rob still a bit upset about things.'' I admitted, trying so hard not to lie about things. I had lied enough in the past, and it was making me feel more and more uncomfortable about having to lie.

''Well…okay.'' Nick agreed, sighing as he took a seat opposite me. ''You know best.'' He added, leaning closer to me. I smiled in response, and leaned in to kiss him. I smiled at him as he pulled away, before looking back to the bar again.

''Thank-you.'' I said back, pleased with how supportive Nick was to me. I didn't deserve him; fact. And it just made me feel more guilty, especially with how things were going with Rob recently.

''That's okay…he looks pretty down actually.'' Yeah, that was probably because I chose you over him. I just nodded, and stayed with him at the bar until the end of the night. When it was finally time to go home with the others, I took Nick's hand in my own. He walked me through the crowd, and we walked out of the doors, ahead of everyone.

***


	28. Truth

I giggled as everyone else came out, and let Nick wrap his arms around me, kissing me. As soon as he had, I wrapped my arms around him tighter, pressing his face to mine.

''Ugh, you guys.'' Rachael complained drunkenly, as she stumbled for the taxi. I pulled away from him, and laughed with him, just as Rob stole a glance at us. He looked so upset at seeing us together, and I felt for him, I really did.

''What is wrong with you?'' Nick demanded. I looked round at him in shock, to see him speaking to Rob. Rob, Tasha and Kellan stopped, watching Rob as he took that in shock. Nick was never rude to Rob.

He did all that he could to stay away from Rob, but now…well, now he was just being rude to Rob. It just so wasn't like Nick to speak like that to anyone at all, and even I was in shock about it.

''What do you mean; _what's wrong with me_?'' Rob demanded back furiously. He glared at Nick furiously, whilst he got over the shock of it. I had to admit; I was just in as much shock as Rob about how Nick was acting.

''I'll explain, shall I?'' Nick replied angrily, stepping forward, making me even more shocked. I watched him, confused. ''I know you and Charlie have had an argument, but that doesn't give you the right to keep giving us evil looks all the time-''

''-Nick, just leave it…please. Rob has just been having a hard time, that's all.'' I begged him, hoping that he would. I had a bad feeling about where this was going, and people were starting to look too…and recognizing Rob, which wasn't good news for him.

''I think that's a good idea. Why don't you just leave it?'' Rob asked him, still annoyed. I stepped between Rob and Nick and broke it up, before this could get any worse, whilst Kellan and Tasha watched on, just in-case they needed to step in or not.

''Well then…stop making Charlie feel bad, just because you're in a strop with her.'' Nick told him, making me surprised. He was being so mean to Rob, now that he was speaking to him, and I'd rather just forget about it.

''Nick…he's not making me feel bad.'' I lied, even though Rob was actually making me feel so guilty and upset about this. There was no way that I was going to admit that to Rob, because I cared a lot for him, and I didn't want him to feel anyway near as guilty as how I felt.

''Yes, he is. All night, you've been considering his feelings, more than considering your own feelings.'' Nick admitted, because yet again…he was right. I looked away from Nick quickly, because I so badly wanted to deny that I wasn't upset about this.

''Well…it's fine, just leave it, please.'' I begged him, because I didn't want to pass on the blame. It was both our faults, and the more that Nick carried on with this, the more chance that Nick had finding out about the depth of mine and Rob's relationship.

Our kiss, kisses in fact. I didn't want Nick finding out about that because I wanted to keep that between me and Rob, and nobody else. It would only hurt Nick, and I still wanted to be with him, not Rob.

Nick sighed, and turned back to look at Rob. ''I may be outspoken about this, and I know that I shouldn't be getting involved, but I'm fed-up of you making Charlie upset all the time.'' Nick admitted, before getting into the taxi too.

Tasha smiled at me, making sure that I was okay. I smiled back, and watched her get into the taxi too, before I looked back to Rob. His face was a perfect mixture of pain and apology written on his face.

I didn't want him to be in the same pain that I had been going through…I didn't want him to be in any pain about what had happened with us. I felt as though it was my fault…my fault entirely. I smiled at him, forcing it despite the pain.

I walked past him, and whispered; ''It's okay.'' I promised him quietly, before getting into the taxi. His face had said it all to me already, so it didn't matter that he hadn't said anything in response to Nick's outburst.

Rob got into another taxi with Kellan and our taxi left without them, so that they could talk more about tonight. I sat outside the house while the party began inside the house, and had a cigarette to calm me down, after tonight.

I was so sure, so sure that me and Rob were going to come out tonight. That we had kissed…twice, and I was a lot more than sure that Nick would have dumped me or something like that.

I wasn't surprised when Rob walked outside, because I had a feeling that we still needed to talk about things. He sat down next to me, and lit up his cigarette, before he started talking to me about tonight.

''I'm sorry. I'm sorry about the way that I've treated you. And before you say anything, before you say that I haven't, just don't please. Because I know that I have, and it hasn't been right on you.'' Rob admitted next to me, before finally stopping and allowing me time to take that in properly.

''It doesn't matter…can we move on now; because that's all I want, as friends.'' I admitted, because it was true. He nodded, looking to me, and smiling happily.

''I'd like that. But I just wanted to know that I'm sorry.'' He admitted. I returned the smile, happy now.

''I know.'' I promised him, even though everything was not all sorted, and I knew that I still had a lot to sort out. Especially with Nick and Rob too now.

***


	29. Coming to Blows

**Get ready for one hell of a chapter…**

I walked back into the house a while later after we had that chat, and after I had calmed down enough to think about things. I walked into the living room, to see Nick sat on the sofa. I smiled at him and sat next to him, because I actually wanted to, for once.

I actually wanted to kiss him, to let him know that I loved him, because…well, the truth was…I was falling in love with him. Slowly, but I was getting there. It may not have been as much as I loved Rob, but that was only because the love that I felt for Rob was obsessive, almost.

Rob walked in five minutes later and as soon as I had seen him, it was impossible to look anywhere else again. I smiled at him, before looking back over to Nick, and smiled at him too. I could still take being friends with Rob.

Nick watched Rob carefully as he took a seat on the other sofa without saying anything, before finally looking away again, after he was satisfied that Rob wasn't looking at us. I kept getting more and more drunk now, because there was nothing else to worry about finally, and I let my hair down again.

However, it was whilst me and Nick were dancing; that things happened again. I knew that Rob needed some time to take me and Nick but obviously Nick didn't know about that, so I could understand why Nick was confused to why Rob kept looking over at us, with a look of sadness, too.

However, when Nick caught Rob giving us a little bit of an evil look after me and Nick had kissed again…he flew off the handle. It was unusual for Nick to do this, especially as I was sure that Rob wasn't actually giving us an evil look.

It didn't look like that to me anyway. But then, maybe I was just making excuses for his behaviour yet again, tonight.

''What is your problem?'' Nick demanded, more furious with Rob now. I looked from Nick to Rob in confusion, because it seemed that Rob hadn't actually done anything wrong, so I was just as confused as Rob.

''You, if you want to know the truth.'' Rob finally admitted, with him shocking me now. I looked back to Rob in shock, whilst Tasha and Kellan stopped dancing in the living room, and turned to watch.

''Rob, stop. And you, Nick; whatever problems you both have with one another, its not worth getting in a fight over, is it? You're both drunk, so lets just leave it at that, please?'' I asked, because I really didn't want them to be starting a fight.

What was the point of it? Nobody would win anyway, and I would just be mad with the two for being so immature about the problems that they couldn't get over with each other. It was pretty immature, after all.

''No…I want to know why has he a problem with me for.'' Nick told me, trying to get to Rob. I shoved him back, because I knew that this was definitely not a good idea. But Nick was still a strong, tall Man, and he was still getting closer and closer to Rob.

''You wouldn't want to know, lets just leave it at that.'' Rob told him, trying to walk away from the situation now, because we both knew what the problem was. If it wasn't for Nick in the way, me and Rob might be together.

''No, because if this is how its going to be because of me and Charlie being together, then I have a serious problem with you.'' Nick confirmed, making Rob huff in response. Kellan had stepped in now, helping get Rob out of the way.

''Yes, look I'm going alright!!'' Rob shouted at Kellan, his hands in the air, as he started to walk out of the living room. I sighed in response, because I really wanted him to stay. But it wasn't a good idea with Nick about.

''All I'm saying is take it easy, alright?'' Kellan warned him. Rob nodded, heading out the door, just as Nick got out of my grip. It definitely wasn't good seeing Nick this drunk, what with going on.

''Nick!'' I warned him in shock, as he walked out to the front of the house. I followed Kellan, Rob and Nick, along with Tasha too, to make sure that everything was okay. But it wasn't. I gasped.

''No…look, I'm sorry if I'm being rude here, but I'm fed-up of you making my Girlfriend feel like rubbish.'' Nick had grabbed hold of Rob's sleeve, stopping him from going anywhere far now.

Rob looked from his hand back to Nick, and I could tell that he was trying to keep his cool. ''Just leave it, why don't you mate? You'll be the one regretting it.'' Rob warned him, because it was true if he was going to say what I thought he was going to say.

''What's that supposed to mean?'' Nick demanded, whilst Kellan tried to pull Nick's hand off of Rob's sleeve…didn't work though.

''Just leave it!'' I begged them both, because I didn't want a fight to break out. This was not what I wanted to see right now, not between my best friend, and my Boyfriend. Why couldn't they just get along?

''Look, this isn't helping here, is it? So if you two want to fight then why don't you both take it elsewhere?'' Tasha asked them, sounding as annoyed as I did. She was holding me back, because she knew that it was likely that I would get hurt if I got to them, what with the way that things were going.

''You wouldn't want to know, so just leave it.'' Rob warned him, through his teeth. He was getting more and more annoyed, and if I could see it, then Nick could definitely see it, so why didn't he just leave things be, instead of making it worse?

''No…I want you to tell me and now. I'm not letting go!'' Nick warned him, glaring at Rob as he tightened his fist around Rob's shirt. I was nearly in tears by this point, because I didn't want this to carry on.

''Am I fucking invisible or something, here? Cant you fucking see that all you two doing is getting Charlie upset? If you want to fight, do it in the fucking morning, when you're sober, and not at my house!'' Tasha shouted at them both.

Rob and Nick looked back to me automatically, and their faces softened. I looked away, before bursting into tears. I couldn't hold the tears back anymore, and it wasn't helping with the fact that this argument was getting worse and worse.

''Oh, well done you two. How many times did Tasha have to fucking warn you before you caused the one thing that you both care about to cry her eyes out?'' Rachael shouted at them, sounding more furious than how Tasha had been.

Tasha instantly put her arms around me, which I was glad about because it covered my face and how upset I was. The thing was though…now that I was crying, I couldn't stop myself from stopping crying.

''Don't even fucking try to hug her Nick, because its your fucking fault for her crying. I hope you're fucking happy now…both of you.'' Tasha warned Nick angrily, after he tried to put his arms around me. His hands instantly dropped.

''All I'm saying is Nick, I just think its best if you both go home, okay? Sort your heads out, and come back tomorrow.'' Tasha added quickly.

''Yeah…Charlie, look…I'm going to go, but…I'll text you tonight, and apologize for what I've done tonight, okay?'' I heard Rob say. ''I'm really sorry for upsetting you, I didn't want to do that. Not again.'' Rob added, and I heard him starting to walk away.

I let him go, because I knew that there was no point pursing him tonight. Because I knew that it would only cause suspicion with me and Nick…however, what Rob had said was enough to cause suspicion, as it was.

''What…how many times have you upset my Girlfriend then?'' I gasped in shock, and turned to look to see Nick following Rob to the gate. Rob stopped automatically, shaking his head in response to how Nick wouldn't leave it, but I knew that it was only because Nick was drunk too. Even though he hated Rob too.

''Just leave it, mate, alright. If you care about Charlie, you'll let me go. Unless you want to see her bursting out in tears again, that is?'' Rob added sneakily. Sneakily, because I knew the other reason why he was trying to get away.

I didn't want Nick to find out about me and Rob, and we both knew that, so Rob was trying to stop Nick from finding out, before Nick finally lost it, and said something that we all would both totally regret.

''Don't patronise me!'' Nick shouted back, mostly because he was drunk, as he pushed Rob back, and away from him. That was it then; Rachael moved us out of the way, ignoring my gasp of shock about what Nick had just done.

''Do not push him, or I swear to god Nick, I will push you back twice as hard. And you wouldn't want to look like a sissy in front of your Girlfriend.'' Rachael warned him, standing in the middle of them, whilst Nick composed himself.

''You want to know what the one thing that pisses me off about you, Rob?'' Nick demanded, trying to take a step towards him. Rachael was there straight away, helping Kellan split the two apart again, whilst Tasha stood with me, watching it get sorted out…finally.

''The fact that I love Charlie, more than anything in this world, and you…you hold all of her attention, do you know that?'' Nick shouted at Rob furiously, making me huff in response. He was using excuses now. I had made no attempt to make it obvious about just how much I liked Rob, not in front of Nick.

''Oh my god, I cant believe you just said that, Nick! You're just using excuses now, I know you are, because-''

''-I know that, because I see the way you two look at each other!'' Nick interrupted me. ''Now, I'm sorry if I'm acting like a jealous Boyfriend here, but what do you expect when you treat my Girlfriend like crap, and she still holds a torch for you?'' Nick demanded, glaring at Rob angrily. Rob looked down to his shoes guiltily, giving it away.

Nick looked back to me, and I looked away too, trying so hard to hold back the guilty tears that I could feel were trying to come out. I wouldn't let them. Nick didn't know how much I still cared about himself though.

''See!'' Nick exclaimed, causing way too much of a scene now. ''You two cant even look at me, because you both know what I know; that Charlie still wants you, and not me!'' Nick added, huffing.

I lost it then, feeling so angry at him that he could suggest it after he knew how much I cared about him. ''Don't you dare say that, Nick! You know that I care a lot about you-''

''-Oh stop being so fucking melodramatic, Nick. Fucking hell, that was a big word for me.'' Rachael added, laughing once, before returning to being serious again, after she had interrupted me.

''But being serious again…you need to fucking stop causing a scene, I mean look…'' Rachael pointed to Adam and whatever his new Girlfriend's name was that he had been cheating on Tasha with when they were going out together.

''I mean…you're causing all the dickheads to come out and watch. We don't want Adam listening to our every word do we, so why don't you leave this petty argument until both you Guys have sobered enough to think with your brains, not somewhere else.'' Rachael added, making Kellan howl with laughter.

Rachael threw him a grin in response, as Tasha laughed too in response. She waited for Nick and Rob to take that in, whilst even Rob was trying not to laugh in response to the annoyance in Rachael's voice.

But Nick…Nick was pissed off, big time. And it was making me upset again to realize that this was killing me as much as it was killing Nick and Rob. Why couldn't they both just leave it, and stop trying to act like they were hard, for god sake?

I mean, was it that much of a different ego thing about these two, or were Men really this stupid? Couldn't they see that this argument was getting more and more fucking pointless as the time went on. It was such a shame Jackson had to miss this, as he had to be at the studio to record; I imagined that he would have been dead proud with his Girlfriend's advice.

''You listen to me, Nick.'' I turned back round to look at Rob in shock, to see him take a step forward to Nick. Rachael watched him, just as unsure as I was. ''If you must know…you would be right…about the way that I looked at Charlie.'' Rob confirmed, making me shocked.

I looked at him as if he had lost his mind, which it seemed that he really had lost his mind, right now. ''I like her…a lot, but still she stays with you. Do you know why that is? Because she loves you, you idiot. And you're so fucking blind, to see it!'' He huffed at Nick in response, shaking his head in response.

''I was right all along…you don't deserve her.'' Rob confirmed, huffing at Nick again, before he turned to look back at me. His face instantly softened, and he smiled apologetically at me. ''I'm sorry Charlie, I really am.'' He apologized properly.

I smiled back and nodded, starting to wonder if…well, if…I had made the right decision to choose Nick over Rob. For once in my life, I not only wanted Rob, but I started to think that maybe it was the best choice.

But I would have to sort all this tomorrow…and if I decided to end things…well, I would do it tomorrow when all of us were sober, and we were all thinking sensible again. ''It's okay, Rob.'' I promised him, watching him turn to leave again.

''I…I haven't finished talking to you.'' Nick confirmed, making me shocked as he grabbed hold of Rob's sleeve again. Rob turned back to look at him in shock, whilst we all groaned in response. Why couldn't he just leave things, instead of making them worse?

''Nick, just fucking let go of him would you? You're not doing yourself any favours here. Especially not with Charlie.'' Rachael confirmed, whilst she tried to split the two up. Nick just held onto Rob's sleeve tighter.

''Rachael's right, do you really think Charlie needs to see this?'' Tasha demanded, sounding really angry with Nick now too. Everyone was just as pissed off with him as I was right now, and if Kirsty would be here, she would so not be happy. It was just lucky that she was out clubbing with her Boyfriend, tonight.

''I agree with Rachael and Tasha. Do you really think that keeping Rob here like this, is going to help you out with Charlie? It will just make her even angrier if anything.'' Kellan warned him, huffing in response to Nick's behaviour.

''And if you don't let go of Rob in about…0.5 seconds, you're going to have me to deal with too.'' Kellan added, threatening Nick now. God, I hoped he did what Kellan said now, because he was making it a whole lot worse for himself.

''I want you to tell me why you have such a problem with me and Charlie's relationship before I let you go-''

''-Isn't this enough reason? Aside from fact that I've fallen in love with her too.'' Everyone gasped as Rob confirmed that, because he hadn't actually admitted that before, not to me. I blushed as everyone turned to look at me for my response.

Because I didn't know what to do, especially as it felt kinda…nice to hear Rob say that about me out loud. I kinda…well…wanted to choose Rob now, but I wasn't sure if I should, if this was going to hurt Nick as much as I imagined it would.

''And you expect me to understand? When you're in love with my Girlfriend?'' Nick demanded furiously.

''And you think that she's still going to want to be your Girlfriend, if you keep this up?'' Rob shouted back at Nick angrily. I had to admit that he had a fair point on that one. Nick wasn't making me happy with the more that he carried on with this.

''I just want to be with Charlie-''

''-Yeah? Well start acting like an adult then, before you really do lose her.'' Rob interrupted Nick furiously. ''You don't deserve her, not after what she does for you.'' Rob added, shaking his head at Nick.

''If you've got something to say to me, then just say it!'' Nick demanded, making Rob huff in response.

''You wouldn't want to hear it!'' Rob shouted back, angrily; still struggling to get Nick's hands off of him, as I watched on shocked, feeling like I was about to actually faint in a minute. My legs felt all wobbly, and like jelly as I watched this going on.

''Just tell me!'' Nick shouted, tightening his fist around Rob's sleeve, and trying to pull him closer to do something that he was bound to regret. I gasped, running up to them now, before Kellan and Rachael could try and stop Nick.

I stepped in front of him, but got pushed out of the way again by someone as Nick pulled Rob closer to him. ''Tell me now!'' Nick demanded angrily, sounding more frustrated because of how Rob was hiding it.

''Okay, fine. Me and Charlie kissed, alright!'' Rob shouted back, finally admitting it. I gasped in shock, turning to look at Rob. Now, I hoped that Rob was happy, because he had certainly done it now.

Rob sighed in frustration and ignored my shocked gaze, carrying on, and making it even worse. Just great. ''Okay, so now you can stop harassing me and Charlie, cant you? So we kissed, twice in fact.'' Rob admitted, shrugging himself out of Nick's grip easily now.

I watched Rob in shock, not sure what that meant for not just me and Nick, but for me and Rob now too. He smiled at me sheepishly, even though it was obvious that he was just as stressed as before he finally admitted it.

I turned to look at Nick now, to see him in even more shock than I was. The colour of his face had completely drained; leaving his face a ghostly white colour rather than his usual, beautiful pinkish cheeks, and darkened skin.

My heart sank for him, because I knew that he had only said everything tonight because he was so drunk. It didn't stop my feelings for him; or the fact that I was still falling in love with him, the more that we dated each other.

''Nick, I…I just want you to know that-''

''-Is it true?'' Nick demanded, interrupting me. I didn't want to tell him, but I wasn't going to lie to him again. There was no point; I would tell the truth, and hope for the best. I mean, he had admitted that he was in love with me.

But then…so had Rob too. I mean…that meant a lot to me. Rob was actually in love with me, and…though I hated to admit it, I was in love with him too. I had tried to deny it, but I was only causing myself more and more pain by doing so.

But I also very much cared for Nick, despite how wrong he had been tonight. We had all said things that we had regretted, and I still wanted Nick and I to be friends, even if we couldn't work out together.

''Yes, its true, but I still love-'' I stopped flat…watching Nick walk out of the garden. I watched after him in shock, wondering if he really was just going to leave me standing here. By the looks of it, he really was going to.

''Nick, wait!'' I called, running out of the garden. I needed him to stop; if he was going to break up with me, then I still wanted to be his friends, because he still meant a lot to me. He always had, just not in that way.

''Charlie…wait, please.'' Rob walked out of the garden after me, and I heard him following me, but right now; it was Nick that I needed to stop to.

''No.'' Nick stopped anyway and turned to look at me. ''I think that we should talk about _us_ or whatever tomorrow. Because I'm only going to do something I really regret, because I'm drunk.'' Nick admitted honestly.

''But please, Nick, I just need to talk to you-''

''-I'm sorry Charlie, but its over. We're over.'' He interrupted me, making it clear for me. I stopped dead, gasping in shock as I watched Nick leave. He shook his head and walked off, but Rob was at my side already.

''You alright?'' He asked me gently.

I shook my head, sitting on the edge of our garden wall, and letting the tears flow. If I didn't sit down, and let myself cry…I think that I might have actually fainted from the depth of my tears. It hit me like a ton of bricks, and I was thankful that Tasha was already there to comfort me.

''Hey…Nick, wait.'' I looked up in shock after hearing Rob say that, and watched as Nick stopped, and turned back round to look at Rob to see what he wanted Nick didn't look happy at all, but Rob looked as though he was trying to sort out things for me.

I smiled, because it was something that Rob would do. He was so kind. But then…the conversation turned nasty. I saw Nick shake his head and lose his patience, his fist flying out and hitting Rob in the face.

I gasped in shock, getting up from the wall straight away, with Tasha followed just behind me. ''Don't fucking hit him like that!'' Tasha shouted, but I was there first. However, Nick was totally ignoring me.

''You're so big headed, you know that? I hate you for making me dump Charlie.'' Nick demanded, throwing another punch at Rob's face. I gasped in shock, trying to split them two up, but not having much luck, neither did Tasha.

Rob lost it then, because Nick was still trying to punch Rob. He pushed Nick away from him, and hit him back round the face, but not nearly as hard as how Nick had punched Rob right round the face.

''Now…go. Before Kellan gets here, and really does something that he'll regret!'' Rob warned Tom, because it was true. I looked back to see Kellan already running down the street to get over here.

Nick walked away then; shaking his head at both of us, as I made sure that Rob was okay. I knew that me and Nick was so over now, and it killed me to know it. Rob was still holding onto his bloody nose, and I looked at him to see him in a right state.

''God, look at the state of you!'' I complained, knowing that by the end of tonight, I was going to cry my heart out about me and Nick being over. It was going to happen, I just knew that it was. I had already cried.

Rob had a black eye already from where he had hit Rob, and his nose was blessing heavily. I sighed heavily in response. ''I think that we should get you inside, get you cleared up.'' I told him.

I followed Tasha and Kellan in, holding onto Rob's arm as we walked into the house. I felt so guilty, especially as it was my fault too. I mean…Rob wouldn't have even tried to get Nick back to me, if I hadn't got so upset about it.

''Are you alright?'' Rob asked me worriedly.

I huffed in response. ''Don't ask about me; this is all my fault. And I am so sorry for everything that's happened tonight.'' I apologized, because I really believed that it was true. I felt like it was all my fault.

''Don't be silly; we all said things that we regret; me especially.'' He promised me, being careful as he walked into the house. I sat him down at the kitchen table, and everyone left me alone with Rob to clear his face up.

I brought the ice cool pack of ice-cubes that I had found in the fridge to his eyes, hearing his winch in pain. ''Sorry…I know that it hurts, but it will do your bruise good.'' I told him, because it was true.

He kept his eyes on mine, as I let him take over holding the pack, and I sat back on the chair behind me, tipping his face back as I held the warm flannel to his nose, which had now stopped bleeding, luckily.

I couldn't stand blood, and yet somehow, I had managed to deal with it, which was a first for me. I smiled at him, trying to kid myself that I was okay, even though we both knew that I was heartbroken about this. I had cared so deeply about Nick.

''I'm sorry.'' Rob apologized, shocking me. ''For the way things ended with Nick…for the way that I had told him…for causing you two to break up…for upsetting you every time that I had…for pushing you into Nick's arms…for everything.'' He apologized, making me sigh in response.

''It's fine.'' I promised him, even though nothing was going to be fine now. Not with me and Nick firmly _over_. And probably with no chance of a friendship in the immediate future either, which made me sad to think.

And there was also one thing that I wanted to know about Rob. Tonight, he had admitted that he was in love with me, and I wanted to know if he meant it so badly. I wanted it to be true…even though I missed Nick.

''Rob, you er…you said tonight…to Nick that…well, that you've fallen in love with me too…'' I trailed off, looking down at my hands as I prepared myself to ask him if he truly meant it. I had to know.

''Did you mean it?'' I asked him cautiously; expecting a flat out no…but I never got one. His hand went under my chin, and gently reached my face up, so that he could see my expression properly as he spoke.

''Every word.'' He promised me And I could tell by the sincerity and the intensity that his eyes held that he was telling the truth about that. I nodded, quickly looking away as soon as he let go of my chin, and feeling so guilty about how happy I felt about that.

''I feel so guilty for feeling happy, you know…because the truth is, I love you too, but…Nick. I don't know…its just…Nick.'' I gasped out, before bursting into tears again. God, what was wrong with me?

As soon as I started crying, Rob drew me back into his arms quickly, whispering that it would be okay. I had to believe, I had to hope that it would be. I loved Rob, but it felt as though…love wasn't enough for this time, if that made any sense, at all.

***


	30. Giving In

I helped Rob up the stairs, because although it was just his face that was bruised…I wanted to help him. I couldn't seem to let go of his arm, because I still felt guilty about everything that happened tonight, and I wanted to make sure that he was okay.

''Are you okay?'' I asked him as we reached the top of the stairs. I mean…he certainly didn't look okay. His face was messed up big time, and there was no way that he was going to be able to face the paparazzi with his face looking how it was.

''Don't worry about me, I'm fine now.'' Rob huffed in response, easily brushing the situation off. I shook my head in response, wondering how he could do it, looking how he did. I mean, if I was him…I would have probably been pretty pissed.

''What about you?'' Rob asked me worriedly, his face instantly looking back to mine, and revealing the panic that I knew he had been hiding. I sighed in response, looking away just in-case I actually burst into tears again.

''I'm…okay.'' I replied awkwardly, because that was the only reply that I could best muster together. I kept my gaze on the floor as I helped Rob into the spare room, which was now very much like Rob's very own bedroom.

I helped him sit down on the bed, still feeling his eyes on mine, with mine still locked onto the floor in-case them tears came again. They were still rising, I could feel them getting closer, threatening to spill over again.

''There's er…some spare clothes…if you need any, in the wardrobe.'' I confirmed, walking over to the curtains, and shutting them closed for the night. I walked over to the night lamp besides Rob's bed, and clicked the lamp on.

''They're Kellan's, from when he stayed over the other night, and they're probably a bit big, but…he said he didn't mind, if you wanted to borrow some.'' I added, looking back to Rob, finally.

He nodded in response, and ran his hand through the top of his hair. ''Well er…thanks. For putting me up, I mean.'' He replied, his back to me thankfully. I walked round the bed, and nodded, so that he could see.

''It's fine. Nobody uses this bedroom anyway.'' I added, because it was true. He nodded again, and looked back to me, making me look away again. It felt too awkward, especially with the way that he was looking at me.

It felt as though he expected me to just open up, and tell him how much it hurt. But I didn't want to keep whining on all night, even if he didn mind it. Nothing was going to change if I just kept whining.

''So…what now?'' He asked me, confusing me. I mean…if he meant about the bedroom, then he could stay here all he liked, but then…something told me that he didn't mean about the bedroom, at all.

''Well…whatever. I mean, you can stay here as long as you like, I really don't mind. And it would be good to know that the spare room is getting some use for once-''

''-I didn't mean about the bedroom.'' Rob interrupted me, spelling it out for me. I looked back to him in shock, to see him looking at me back, questioning me. ''I mean about us.'' He added, making it crystal clear.

''Well…I…er…'' I sighed heavily, and tried to say what I needed to say again, after I had failed so terribly. ''I'll speak to Nick in the morning, he promised me that.'' I reminded Rob. He looked at me in shock, as though I had lost my mind.

I had to admit; I had been expecting him to react like that.

''So…you're actually going to take him back?'' He asked me in shock. I looked away quickly from his demanding stare, and to the floor. I pursed my lips as I thought about how to reply to that.

''I need to…I need to speak to him at the least, I don't know if we'll get back together, but we might-''

''-But For what?'' Rob demanded angrily. ''You said it yourself that you love me, so what would be the point in taking him back? Especially after how he acted tonight.'' He reminded me furiously.

''Because I don't want this to happen. I don't want to give _us_ a try, okay?'' I shouted back, before I knew what I was saying. He watched me in shock, making me sigh heavily in response. Why did he have to make this so hard for?

''There are so many reasons for us not to be together. So many reasons which _you_ seem to have forgotten about.'' I reminded him furiously, losing my patience with him. It was as though he thought everything would be great if we were together. It didn't exactly work like that, he should know.

''Like what?'' He demanded, still in shock.

I sighed, and forced myself to tell him, seems as though he wanted to know so badly. ''One; the paparazzi, the fame. I don't want to be part of any of that. I don't want to be part of the fame that you're in, that's not what I'm about.'' I gave him one reason.

''Two; I don't want to be hurt again. I'm fed-up of making the wrong decisions, and ones that hurt _me_. I'm always looking after other people and worrying about everyone else, but why should I, when my happiness is always put second-''

''-Then give me a chance.'' Rob interrupted me, getting up from the bed. I watched him confused, wondering what he was going to do. I sighed heavily in response though, because I couldn't just give him a chance, not just like that.

Taking on Rob, meant taking on fame, and that was something that I didn't want or didn't need doing. ''What about the fame? I don't want anything to do with that, with that part of your life. Nick's easy, comfortable. It would be easier-''

''-Who needs easier?'' Rob interrupted me again, standing right I front of me, too close for me to think straight. I opened and closed my mouth in shock, trying to think of something to say to him. He looked so beautiful, especially with how close he was to me now.

''I…well…I need easier. It would be easier for me, because I…well, I…it wouldn't be right if I…well, if I…not after Nick, I couldn't…well…just go out with you just after…well…Nick…and I er-''

''-We both know what you want.'' He spelled it out for me, stepping forward still, and pressing his hands to my face. I watched him in shock, but I didn't have time to response, because his lips had already pressed to mine. I gasped against his lips in shock, trying to pull his face free from mine, but with no such luck. He kissed me urgently, daring me to kiss him back, like how he knew that I wanted to.

But I couldn't. As much as I wanted to, all I had to do was keep thinking of Nick. Keep his image in my head, and remind myself that I was seeing him tomorrow. He would take me back, even if I had to beg him.

I still cared about Nick, and he was the easy route for me to take. I preferred easy, and all I had to do was not kiss Rob back. Everything would be fine, everything would be fine. Just don't kiss Rob back…

Don't kiss Rob back, that's all I had to do. Think of Nick, think of how much he meant to you. This was wrong…

But it was getting harder and harder to extinguish the right from the wrong as Rob started to get more and more annoyed with me for not kissing him back. He pushed me back into the wall hard, making me gasp in shock.

His body followed; pressing closer to mine, and making me gasp in shock again. How could I possibly think straight with his body this close to mine; pressing eagerly against my own body? This whole thing was torturing me.

He pulled away then, and glared at me angrily. ''Why don't you let yourself feel what you want for once? I love you, and you love me. What else is there to think about?'' He demanded furiously.

I didn't have the time to reply, because he pushed me back, and pressed his lips hard into mine. I gasped in shock, as he pulled my body to his forcefully, by my hips. I gasped again in shock as he forced me back onto the bed.

I fell, but pushed him away now, because this was getting way, way over the top. ''Stop, this isn't right.'' I gasped out as he pulled back to look at me.

''Who cares about what's right? I'm fed-up of trying to do what's right. I want you as much as you want me. I'm in love with you, Charlie, and I'm fed-up of having to deny that.'' With that, he pressed his lips back down to mine urgently.

I couldn't take anymore. I wasn't going to deny myself anymore. I kissed him back, letting my hands lock into the back of his hair, pressing his face closer to mine. He kissed me urgently, pressing his hands to either side of my face rougher as I kissed him back.

I couldn't believe that I had been fighting this all this time. I must have been stupid, to missing out on this. I couldn't deny myself anymore even if I would regret it later…

***


	31. Time

I pulled away from him, needing oxygen and the time to think. I gasped for my breathe, watching Rob catch his breathe too. As soon as we had both got our breathes back however, Rob was back on me, trying to kiss me again.

''No…Rob, wait.'' I begged him, because I felt so overpowingly guilty about our intense, longing kiss. I had wanted Nick a moment ago, and me and Rob had…well…we had been kissing for a while.

''You kissed me back.'' He reminded me sourly, sounding as pissed off as he should be. Of course he was expected to be angry, but…well, I needed time and space to take this in, and he had totally thrown that kiss at me.

''Yes Rob, I know I did. And what do you expect when you kiss me like that?'' I demanded, sounding just as angrily as how he did. He watched me with the same half-closed eyes, mad with lust, making me shiver in delight.

''You need to give me some time. The more that you try and push me into your arms, the more chance that I'll go back to Nick…I'm sorry but that's the only way that I can put it to you.'' I admitted, quickly climbing off of the bed.

''So…you don't want me-''

''-I just want some time, okay? Is that too much to ask for?'' I asked him, because I needed to know. I needed him to let me have some space and some time to think things over, choose what I want, and get over Nick.

''Time to get over Nick?''

''Yes, exactly. Can you understand that, please?'' I begged him. He nodded, and got up from the bed now too. He walked over to me, and I watched him in shock as he took my face in his hands. Oh god, I couldn't let this happen again.

''Rob, please no-'' I stopped myself as soon as he had pressed his lips gently down to my forehead. I sighed happily in response, and let the feel of his gentle lips against my skin wash over me. It was a pleasant feeling.

''I'll give you all the time that you need.'' Rob promised me as he pulled back to look at me. I smiled in response, grateful with his promise. This meant more to me than anything that he could have ever possibly given me.

''Thank you, so much. This means a lot to me, I hope you realize.'' I added, because it was true. He nodded, smiling back and letting me leave his bedroom.

I walked into my bedroom, where it all came flooding back to me. I sunk to the floor as soon as I was in my dressing gown, even though I didn't even know why I was crying for. I never seemed to know lately.

The kiss that I had shared with Rob, felt even more wrong than usual, despite the fact that I was newly single. All I could think about was the fact that I wanted Nick back, and how it hurt to know that we were broken up from each other.

I cried so much that I eventually cried myself to sleep that night, which was both a good thing and a bad thing. I didn't want to sleep, I just wanted to sort this whole mess out, and I knew that I wasn't probably going to be able to.

***

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	32. London Plans

I got up early in the morning and booked two weeks off of work, whether the office was ready for me to go back to or not. I needed to get away from LA, and away from Rob and Nick for a while to sort my head out.

I had a quick shower, and put on a grey, strapped dress and walked downstairs to get my breakfast. I got a bowl of cereal, simple and easy to eat, because I didn't think that I would actually be able to keep anything else down.

I was too nervous about what I knew that I had to do. I got hold of my laptop and went onto the internet to look for a flight back to London, whilst I ate my breakfast. After all, there was no time to waste. I had two weeks to decide on what I wanted-Rob or Nick-and the more time that I had in England, the more time that I had to think things through.

I looked up in time to see Rob walking down the stairs, and I quickly looked back at the computer screen again, because I was busy, and I didn't want to change my mind about this with one look at Rob.

It was what I needed to do; I needed to get away from here and think about things, even though I knew that I would miss the one person the most. The one person that meant so much to me, and always had…Rob.

He smiled at me as he walked into the kitchen, and I smiled back, slightly less sure than how he looked. He walked over to the kitchen table, giving me time to take in what he was wearing today, even though I shouldn't have been looking.

He was wearing a grey vest, which looked quite big for him, and dark blue, fitted, skinny jeans, and his usual smart, black shoes to match with it. He sat down at the kitchen table, running his hands through the top of his surprisingly neat hair.

''Morning.'' He grinned at me, watching as he poured himself a glass of orange. I looked up from the laptop whilst I searched for cheaper flights, and smiled back at him. God, I would miss everything about Rob.

Especially that grin, and his witty charm that came easily to him. Everything about him spurred me on, and that was why I had to leave…and now. It wasn't right…feeling the way that I did about him.

Not when them feelings for Nick were still obviously potent. I couldn't keep messing people about, and making wrong decisions. If I left now, at least I would have been able to make a more sensible decision.

''Hey. How did you sleep in the spare room last night?'' I asked him lightly, making easy conversation with him. I looked back to my laptop screen, where it was loading all available flights to airports in England, for today.

''I had a good sleep, thanks. And I wanted to thank you for letting me stay the night, again.'' He added, making me smile. There really wasn't any need to thank me; he was always welcome here to stay when he needed to stay here, to get away from the fame or whatever.

''No need to thank me. I'm sure that I'm speaking for all of the Girls, when I say that you're welcome here anytime.'' I promised him truthfully. I looked back to the laptop again, to have a look at the available flights.

I clicked on a flight available for three this afternoon, which was heading to Gatwick airport, which would be useful for me to stay with my Aunt Kim and Uncle Mark, who lived nearby in London.

''Are you er…looking for something on the computer?'' Rob asked me unsure, sounding as though he was trying not to be too nosy. I went back to eating my cereal, and nodded in response; watching him drink a sip of his orange juice.

''Er…yeah. I'm looking for flights.'' I replied simply, before looking back to the laptop, and seeing that the flight cost was going to cost me $300 dollars. There was no way that I had that kinda money around.

I had $100 dollars at the most, and I wouldn't get paid until the end of the month, mostly holiday pay too because of how the office was completely unusable. I sighed heavily in response, pondering on what to do for the best.

''Are you…going on holiday?'' Rob asked me confused. I sighed again, knowing that this wasn't going to likely end well when I told him, but knowing that I actually had to. I shook my head in response.

''No, not on holiday.'' I replied simply, looking for another flight; any, any which were much cheaper than the one I had just looked at, and less than a $100 dollars, just for a flight back to London.

''So…where are you going then?'' Rob asked me again, trying not to sound too nosy…and failing. I sighed heavily in response, and gave up with the laptop for the minute, and looked back to Rob, to see him staring at me, confused.

''I'm heading back to London for a while, to sort my head out.'' I admitted, watching him sink that news in. He nodded, quickly looking away from me again. The color had drained from his face, the shock still evident.

I sighed in response, knowing that he wasn't happy now. It was evident in the way that he wasn't even looking at me now.

''I have to go back home, I have to give myself time to figure things out on my own.'' I admitted, keeping my eyes locked with his, even though he couldn't do the same. ''You promised me some space, right?'' I added.

He nodded, still not keeping his eyes with mine.

''Right, well this is the space that _I_ need. Cant you give me that much?'' I asked him hopefully. I needed the space for myself, to figure things on my own, and without anybody's help. I had managed it before and I wanted to manage it now.

He nodded again, but still kept his eyes locked with the kitchen table. I knew what was happening here; he was wallowing; or so it seemed. But it wasn't going to get him anywhere, because I had made my mind up.

''Thank you.'' I replied simply, getting up from the table and putting my cereal bowl in the washing up bowl. I grabbed my cigarette packet and lighter from the kitchen side, and turned back round to look at him.

''I need a cigarette. Are you coming outside?'' I asked him, to try and act as though things were normal. It didn't help when he shook his head, still seeming to be wallowing over my decision to leave.

''Fair enough.'' I replied, trying to act as unbothered as I could, whilst I grabbed my laptop too, and headed outside to have my cigarette. I placed my laptop on my lap and searched for a different site, with different flights back to London.

I eventually found a flight back to London for $150 dollars, and I knew that Tasha or one of the Girls would probably be kind enough to lend me a fifty to get back home with. Especially as the Girls were on a better income than what I was on right now.

That was until I saw that the seats were all gone. I sighed heavily in frustration, seeing Rob walk out of the kitchen in the corner of my eye…and he didn't look happy. ''If you've come to have a go, don't even fucking bother, because I am not in the mood.'' I spelled it out for him, feeling very much pissed off right now with the fact that I couldn't even get back home. Not for today anyway.

''I wanted to know if you was having any luck with getting flights. I know that most of the flights to London are harder to get without much notice.'' Rob admitted, shocking me. I looked back to him in shock, wondering if he was actually just going to accept my leaving as easy as he seemed to be.

It would mean a lot to me if he just let me go home and get the space that I needed, rather than having to cause an argument before I went. I had to admit though; that I didn't think he would do that, not just before I left, like that.

''Urm…yeah. Well, I have a hundred dollars, and I need at least three hundred to get back to London, so that isn't a great start.'' I admitted, sighing heavily as I pondered my eyes over the computer screen again.

''Well…I could easily give you the rest of the money, if you wanted it.'' Rob offered, sitting down besides me on the outdoor sofa. I stared at him in shock, not actually believing that he had offered me that.

''I…well, I cant take your money.'' I replied, because I just couldn't. I had known the Girls longer, and they wouldn't mind lending me the money. It was a different thing when I asked Rob to lend me the money, when he hadn't known me for that long.

''Why not? I'm offering you the money, and you wouldn't have to pay me back.'' He added, making me feel even guiltier. I couldn't actually let him do that for me, it wasn't right. I didn't want his money.

''Yeah, well…I'd rather get the money in my own way, if you don't mind.'' I asked him. He nodded, seeming confused. ''The thing is…I've known the Girls longest so it would be fair to accept their money, but…I cant accept your money, even when you're offering. I'm sorry, but…I just…yeah, find it uncomfortable.'' I admitted, because it was true.

He nodded again, seeming to understand what I was trying to tell him now. I didn't care if it was silly, I didn't want his money, and I didn't want him thinking that I just wanted his money either. I wouldn't risk it.

''Well…okay. But if you need the help, I'm here.'' He promised me, as I got off of the outdoor sofa, ready to go back inside the house now.

''Urm…Rob?'' I asked him as I got to the door.

''Yeah?'' He asked me, looking round at me, confused.

''Thanks.'' I smiled, gratefully. He smiled back, before I walked into the house and began to pack my suitcase; pondering on how I was going to get home now.

***


	33. My Promise

I sat down in the living room whilst I decided on how I was going to get the money for the flight. I didn't want Rob's money and I definitely wasn't going down that route, because I knew that I would feel guilty and uncomfortable for having to take his money.

I knew that it didn't make sense, especially after Rob had actually offered me the money, but he didn't owe me anything. And the last thing that I wanted was his money when he was as famous and as rich as he was especially.

That just wasn't me.

Everyone was up now, and I knew that everyone was sat in the garden, catching a sun tan while I sat here, stressing over this, but I knew that I had to do it now, rather than later. Because I would only be worrying about it later, and I needed to get out of here, now.

Rob walked into the living room whilst I was stressing about what to do, and I threw him a smile; hoping that it looked a lot more convincing than what I felt it looked like. He sighed heavily though, telling me that I looked as stressed as I felt right now.

''I'm here if you need any help, just so you know.'' He promised me, taking a seat next to me. I sighed in response, because that wasn't helping. How could I make a fucking decision on my own, if I couldn't do this on my own?

''No, and it doesn't help if you must know.'' I replied, annoyed. ''I know you're only trying to help, but its not really helping at all. I need to do more things on my own.'' I added, hoping that he would understand where I was coming from.

He nodded. ''Okay.'' He agreed simply, sipping his glass of water, and going silent again, automatically making me feel guilty with how I had spoken to him. I may have been stressed, but there was no point taking it out on him, was there?

''Sorry…I'm just stressed.'' I admitted, sighing again. He nodded, and moved closer to me, putting his arm around the back of the sofa as he turned to look at the screen. I knew that he didn't mean to sit so close to me-he was only looking at the laptop screen-but I had to admit that the closeness of him was…well, making my choices blurred again.

''Right…well, what are you stressed about?'' Rob asked me in confusion.

''How about everything. Everything about these stupid flights that is.'' I sighed in frustration; hitting the edge of my keyboard in annoyance. Rob chuckled in response, taking the laptop from me, and placing it on his lap, to look at it properly.

''Right, well…there's a flight for tomorrow at nine, for $100 dollars. Is that what you can afford?'' Rob asked me after a moment. I huffed in response, annoyed with just the fact that he had found a useful flight when I couldn't.

''Well….it will just have to do. I wanted to leave for today though, because…well, the sooner I got away from here, the better.'' I admitted, forcing myself to agree. He nodded, his smile gone as soon as I had said the last bit.

''I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that I want to get away from here to clear my head. I cant think straight with having you so close. You visit here everyday, and there's still Nick, who only lives round the corner.'' I said it less harshly.

''I mean, I enjoy your company, but having you two so close to me right now is just making me feel more and more confused right now.'' I added, admitting it easily. He nodded and brightened up a little bit.

''Well, that's the cheapest, soonest flight that you can afford.'' He confirmed, looking back to me. I nodded, and took my laptop back from him.

''Okay, well….thanks for the help.'' I pondered on whether to ask if he understood my reasons to leave. I mean…he had brightened up a little bit, but…he hadn't said anything in response to that. I didn't want him to think that I didn't want to stay here…to be with him, in fact.

''Do you er…understand my reasons for leaving? I mean…right now, I want to choose you, but I know if I make a decision now, I'll only regret it later.'' I added, because everything I had said was true.

He nodded, looking back to me as I put my laptop down, and shut the screen closed. ''Of course I do. You want some time and space to think about things, I understand that. I think I've pushed you to Nick enough as it is.'' He added, sighing unhappily.

I looked back to him, feeling the confusion on my face as I gazed at him. ''How do you mean?'' I asked him.

''Well…'' he began, trailing off as he thought about what to say. ''Well, I feel as though I couldn't have made am more negative impact on you. I pressurized you into making a decision all the time, and all along, I was pushing you away.'' He sighed again.

I smiled in response to his beauty. He looked so beautiful; his forehead creased in concentration, his hand running lightly through the top of his hair in embarrassment. Even the way that he pursed his lips caught my attention.

And this was why I had to get away. It was too soon after I had broken up with Nick, and anything that I did do now, I would only regret later. That's why I needed to leave as soon as possible.

''Don't worry about it. The sooner I get out of here and have time to think things through properly, the better.'' I admitted, smiling. He smiled back, still a little happier now that I had rephrased my words properly.

My phone started ringing then, and I blushed as it played the reggae song that I always used to say was mine and Rob's song. Rob watched me curiously in response, but I ignored his gaze, looking down at my mobile confused.

It was an American number.

''I don't understand…its an American number calling me.'' I admitted confused. I showed Rob my mobile whilst it was still ringing. He looked at the I.D. confused, and shrugged.

''Well, it must be someone you know…do you have any family in America?'' He asked me curiously.

''Urm yeah…I have an Aunt and Uncle who live in Florida, but I haven't spoken to them in years, and I don't think its them.'' I admitted, feeling a bit confused about who else it could have been. I didn't know anyone else in America; I hadn't even spoken to my cousin, Billy in years.

''Well, just answer it, and see who it is.'' Rob replied, shrugging easily again. I nodded, and held the phone to my ear, nervously.

''Hello?'' I asked unsure.

''Hey you. We heard our Niece was living in America now!'' I heard my Aunt Joyce say. I gasped in shock, not actually believing that it was her. I hadn't spoken to her for years, and now she was finally

''Oh my god, Aunt Joyce, is this actually you?'' I asked in shock. I turned to look at Rob, to see him in just as shock as I was. I hadn't spoken to her since I was about ten. I was so happy that she had actually called me.

''That's me, we called to see how you're getting on in America, baby. So how are you enjoying it?'' I blushed in response to her term _baby_. I was twenty two now, so you'd forgive me for finding that a tiny bit embarrassing.

''Well…I'm going back to England, to live with Aunt Kim and Uncle Mark for a while.'' I admitted.

''Aww sweetie, how come? Are you missing your family?'' She asked me gently. I looked back to Rob and smiled shyly.

''It's a…long story.'' I admitted, because it was true. I really didn't want to get into that conversation as to why I was moving back. I couldn't imagine explaining that to her, especially with Rob to explain too.

I could imagine what she would say about Rob. She would say that I should choose him, because he was the right person for me, but I didn't need telling what to do right now. I just needed space and time to escape from it all.

''Well, if you need somewhere to stay, you could always come and visit us in Florida. I've already sent you plane tickets, just in-case you want to. They run out next year, so you have plenty of time to decide.''

I gasped in shock in response, because this was the best news ever. If I was in Florida, I would be far away from Los Angeles, and still with my Family. And I had missed my Aunt Joyce, and my Cousin Billy a hell of a lot.

''Oh my god…well…I really want somewhere to stay. So is it okay if I come and visit you as soon as I get the tickets?'' I asked her hopefully. I'd rather go to Florida and meet my Aunt and Uncle who I hadn't seen for years, rather than being judged by why and who had pushed me home.

''Yeah of course sweetie. We'll look forward to you coming to stay.'' She promised, making me feel so happy.

''Well, I'll just have to sort everything out, is that okay? I'll speak to you soon.'' I promised her, dead excited now.

''Okay, bye.'' I put the phone down, and turned to look at Rob, trying to keep myself from getting too excited, like how I wanted to. I couldn't get over how cool this holiday was going to be; it was definitely what I needed.

''Was that your Aunt?'' Rob asked me, even though he already knew that it was. I nodded, and moved forward, resting my arm on the back of the sofa now. He watched me the whole time, whilst I tried to continue to hold in my excitement.

''My Aunt said that I can go and stay with her in Florida for a while. And I've agreed to go, because I think it will do me good. And she's sent me plane tickets across for me to use.'' I grinned.

He nodded, trying to keep the smile on his face. I knew that he was unhappy about me going though. I sighed, and took his hands in mine; trying to think of the best way to prove to him that I would still want him when I came back.

The thing was, I knew that I would want him still when I came back home. I just needed some time to figure stuff out, but when I had…I would be back home again, and I figured that I would probably still feel the same about him when I got back. Especially after I had spent so long loving him.

''You mean everything to me, you know that.'' I promised him, because it was true. ''And when I get back from Florida, I'm still going to be feeling the same about you. Love doesn't just disappear; especially not after how love I've been in love with you.'' I admitted, watching his face as he continued to gaze at me.

He was calm, happy to watch as I explained. ''I've been in love with you before I had even met you, and I'm not going to deny myself of you anymore. Not as long as you want me like this.'' I promised him.

''I'm not going to change how I feel about you.'' He promised me, giving me the information that I needed to know. I dropped his hands, and confusing him as I let my hands sneak up his arms slowly.

He watched me confused, shocked even as I wrapped my hands gently around each side of his face. I smiled at him in reassurance, taking in his perfect features; the way that his hair curled over on the very top of his head, the way his eyes were gazing at me; holding every kind-of emotional that I could only dream of seeing on Rob's face.

Even his lips…which instantly caught my attention. I needed to do this, to get him to believe that I was staying as soon as I got back from Florida; I would be his. If he wanted me still that was; because I was sure that once I cleared my head, and moved on from Nick, I would be able to move on.

I leaned down and pressed my lips down to his gently; closing my eyes automatically and wrapping my arms tightly around his neck. He kissed me back of course, and I was so glad that he did.

He kissed me back with the same gentleness that I was using with him, and his own hands slipped to my shoulders…running down until he found my hips, and gently pressed me further into him, closer.

I kissed him back with more urgency, taking his lower lip between my teeth, and gently sucking on the sensitive skin. Rob moaned against my lips in response, but pulled away from me; making me confused.

''No Charlie…you don't have to kiss me…not if you feel like you have to.'' He promised me, making me huff in response.

''I'm kissing you because I want to. I want to show you that I'll still be here for you when I come back. As long as you want me, I'm going to be here, fighting for you.'' I promised him, returning my lips to his.

He kissed me back for another moment; our lips moving against each other in perfect sync, silently moving in rhythm against one another's. There was nothing quite like having his lips pressed against mine, our breathes mingled together as our kiss got more and more urgent and needy.

Eventually though, I pulled away, giving me time to look at him. I smiled back at him; just as happily as how he felt.

''I'll always feel the same about you, no matter what happens; just so you know.'' I promised him, keeping our hands locked together. He would always mean a lot to me, I knew that he would. It would be impossible to forget my feelings for someone who meant the world to me, like how Rob did to me.

***


	34. Something To Think About

I packed my suitcase, ready to go. I had got the plane tickets that very same afternoon, and I was flying out that night. I was almost all packed, ready to leave when Rob walked into the bedroom, to see how I was getting on.

I smiled at him, packing my favorite Esme teddy bear, and looking around my bedroom to make sure that I had gotten everything packed. By the looks of it, I had packed everything in my suitcase now.

''All done?'' Rob asked from the doorway. I nodded, smiling happily now that everything was now done. I felt a lot less stressed now that everything was packed, and ready for me to leave for Florida.

''Yep, didn't take too long either.'' I admitted, because it was true. ''It's strange how it only takes a short while to pack all of your things together.'' I sighed heavily as I looked around my bedroom again.

''Well…at least everything's sorted now.'' He agreed simply. I nodded in agreement, and took another look around my bedroom. I would miss living here during my stay in Florida. And I would definitely miss Rob a lot.

''Yeah, and I mean…I shouldn't be staying in Florida for too long anyway…maybe a couple of weeks, but…not long.'' I admitted, looking back at him to see his reaction on that. He nodded, keeping a perfect poker face, and quickly looking away again.

''Er…what time are you going then?'' He asked me, running his hands through the top of his hair. He ignored my gaze, and walked over to the window, at the front of the room, and looked out to sunny L.A.

''Now, preferably. I mean…the sooner that I can get there, the more likely that I can get booked into the airport, and have everything sorted for when I get onto that plane.'' I admitted, because it was true.

''Oh…so….you're going now then?'' He asked me, sounding disappointed about that fact. But it would be for the best.

''Yeah, I am. It would be better if I leave earlier.'' I admitted, because it was true. He nodded again, and forced himself to look back round, and at me. I smiled in what I hoped was reassurance.

He smiled back, but quickly looked away from me again. ''Well…can I drop you off at the airport? Give you a free lift, I mean…would that be okay?'' He asked me unsure. I gave that a little bit of a thought; did I want him to take me to the airport? Hell yes, I did.

''Ur yeah, I'd appreciate that. That would mean a lot.'' I admitted, because it was true. It would mean a hell of a lot to me to spend my last moments in Los Angeles with Rob. Especially as I _wanted_ him to know that I would still want him when I came back.

''Good, well…it would mean a lot to me too.'' Rob admitted, looking back to me, and keeping our gazes locked together. My heart thumped unevenly in my chest in response, my blush reddening my cheeks.

''Well…I suppose that I should er…go and say goodbye to the Girls…you know.'' I trailed off several times, because I wasn't too sure what to say…not with how he was looking at me, as if questioning me on whether I really wanted to go or not.

''Yeah, of course. Well…go and say goodbye, and I'll take this suitcase down for you.'' He promised me sweetly. I watched him unsure, because I was really struggling with my suitcase, and I had to wonder if he would manage it; my suitcase was really heavy.

''Are you sure? I don't mean to sound rude, its just that…well, my suitcase is really heavy.'' I added quickly, laughing it off incase he actually thought that I was calling him unfit or whatever, because I mean well…I had checked out his body several times…just out of habit, of course, and well…he definitely wasn't unfit by any means.

''I don't mind, I'll grab it for you now.'' Rob promised me. I nodded, and watched him carefully as he picked it up…with mad fantasies running through my head still. Damn him for being so good looking. It was his fault for that much.

As soon as he had picked it up though, the suitcase fell back onto the floor with a loud bang where he had dropped it, making me laugh in response. I couldn't stop myself laughing because…well, it had been quite funny.

''Sorry, sorry…it's not funny.'' I apologized, one last laugh slipping past me. He winched in pain, trying not to put his foot in the air in pain. I snickered back a laugh, because he had hit his right foot.

''Ur…is your foot alright there?'' I asked him, trying not to laugh again, even though it was getting harder and harder and not to as he tried to keep his right foot on the floor. He nodded, quickly looking away again and running his right hand through the top of his hair in embarrassment.

''Fine.'' He gasped out, between his gritted teeth, making me laugh again in response. I walked forward whilst he looked away, concentrating on not to complain about hitting his foot and how much it hurt.

He was such a man; trying to act like everything was fine, and as though he hadn't hit his foot, and was now in pain. He made me laugh again, because I couldn't help it. He looked quite cute, bless him.

''I'd kiss it better for you, but as its your foot…I don't think so.'' I said jokingly, watching as he turned back round to look at me. I laughed then to try and make the awkward moment, less…awkward.

I didn't have time though, because he was smiling back; and…to be honest, I was utterly and completely lost in his charming smile. It was similar to the effect that Edward had on Bella; I was…dazzled, completely.

''There's always another place that you could kiss.'' He replied cheekily, before his embarrassment ended up showing through his fake, cool façade. ''I mean erm…as a last kiss goodbye, I mean.'' He added embarrassedly, running his hand through the top of his hair, making me smile in response.

''I'd love to.'' I replied, taking his face in between my hands before he could have a chance, and pressing my lips against his. He moaned against my lips in response, kissing me back eagerly, and kinda…pushing it a bit too far…literally.

He stumbled forward and into me, totally lost in our kiss, and a bit too much compared to me, it seemed. I gasped in shock as he pushed me back, and my back slammed into the wall, hard; his body following mine eagerly; pressing to my own body.

This was a bit too intense for what I had in mind, and I was about to push him away…to tell him that I wasn't sure that this was a great idea, not just right before we left to the airport anyway; this should wait until I got back.

But then…I started to think more about what we were doing, where this kiss was heading, and wondered if…well, if I kissed him back with the same eagerness as he was kissing me, with the same intensity; that maybe…well maybe I would be giving him something to think back whilst I was away.

Was it stupid? Hell yes, of course it was, but I was right. He had a million kind of Girls falling at hid feet, begging him to bite them, because they actually thought that he was Edward. I loved Rob, but…there were definitely still lots of millions of Girls that were in love with him, and would do anything for just one night with him.

And here I was, kissing him, with…well…Rob Pattinson getting quite a bit eager, and I was kissing him back softly, not letting hardly any of my emotion show…it was time to show him just how much I wanted him.

I pushed him back and away from him, and he carried on kissing me eagerly, urgently, as he tried to work out what I was doing. I helped him out there, pushing him back onto my bed, and sitting on his lap, before I realized that I needed oxygen and I kinda had to pull away now before I would faint from lack of oxygen to the lungs.

I pulled away from him, gasping in a deep, needed breathe just as his lips trailed away from my lips and began to make a glorious trail of kissed down from my chin right down to my jaw and stopping at my neck.

''Rob.'' I gasped out between taking breathes, wanting him to carry on that beautiful trail of kisses. They felt so good against my skin, and wrong or right, I wanted him to carry on. I couldn't think about anything, especially not Nick, with the way that Rob was kissing me.

''Uh huh.'' He agreed breathlessly, making his trail of kisses round my neck again, as I pushed my head back to give him better access. This was so good…nothing could actually compare to the way that he was kissing me at all.

I wrapped my hands into the back of his hair, letting my hands fall from his face to around his neck; letting them gently rest there. He trailed his lips back up again, and found my lips once more, and I pushed him back gently; our bodies falling to the bed, just as he began to deepen our kiss…

A cleared throat made me jump and instantly separate myself from Rob's body. I lay down next to him, struggling to catch my breathe as I glanced at Rachael, standing and watching us disapprovingly from the door.

''God…I think that it was lucky that I interrupted when I did…you two are like dogs on heat.'' She huffed jokingly, making me flush bright red in response. She laughed, and pulled me up from the bed, by my hand as Rob grabbed the suitcase and followed us out of the room; looking just as embarrassed and flustered as I was.

''Only joking…but you do need to say goodbye to us Girlies. You can do whatever you like to Rob whilst your in that car.'' She added, making me blush again. God, she was so embarrassing when she was like that.

''Rachael!'' I complained under my breathe. She laughed in response and lead me downstairs, where everyone was waiting in the hallway for me. I smiled at everyone, noticing that they seemed to be trying not to cry, bless them.

I hugged everyone goodbye, and got to the door, watching Rob come back from the car after he put my suitcase in the boot for me. I looked back to the Girls and smiled, trying not to cry myself at this point.

''Well…you know that I'll miss you, twilight buds.'' I admitted, making the Girls laugh in response.

''Are you sure that you cant stay until tonight when the Guys come round?'' Tasha asked me again.

I shook my head, because I knew that if I didn't leave now, then I might actually not be able to force myself to leave tonight. And I mean…that kiss had meant a lot to me with Rob, but I still needed to have that choice, to have that time to think clearly on things, to clear my head before things got far more intense.

''Yeah, sorry, but I think its for the best.'' I admitted, because that's how I genially felt. I walked to the care with Rob then, keeping a fair distance until we got to his car. He had brought a brand new BMW, which was quite a cool car.

I got in silently and listened as a C.D came on. I smiled in response to hear that he was listening to a _Van Morrison _C.D. I absolutely loved his music, and I was happy to find out all them years ago that Rob liked his music too.

I stayed quiet in the car, letting him hold my hand as we neared the airport, because the truth was…the closer that I got to the airport…the more I wanted to stay, but right now; I needed some breathing space; it was for the best.

***


	35. Florida

**My Aunt Joyce and Uncle Arthur was pleased to see me again, to say the least. I didn't want any fuss during my stay here, but it was nice for them to make the effort for me, bless them. Florida was possibly just as hot as how it was in Los Angeles, and that was saying something.**

**The weather was lovely though when I arrived, although I spent the whole day back at the house to find my feet, and put my stuff in my room. They had six bedrooms, and it was impossible to forget about how big their actual house was. **

**I spent the whole day with my Aunt and Uncle in their huge living room, catching up about old times and for a well needed catch up. I say well needed, because I hadn't seen her for the last twelve years. **

**I smiled shyly at my Aunt Joyce and Uncle Arthur unsure as I stepped into the huge living room, taking in its perfect features. There was a perfect, brand new flat screen television at the front of the living room, and both of the sofas were cream, leather and brand new. **

''**So, how are you enjoying your time in America?'' Aunt Joyce asked me as I sat down next to her in the comfy looking sofas. God, they really were as comfy as they felt; more-so than any sofa I had sat on. **

''**I'm really liking it, I've had a great time in LA.'' I admitted happily, even if it was slightly…stressful, was the right word, I think. But I didn't move to Los Angeles, and think it was going to be all plain sailing either; I knew that it might be difficult when moving from England to America. **

''**Aww, that's really great new, honey.'' She replied pleased, passing me a plate with chocolate brownies for me to take one. I smiled appreciatively, not really feeling that hungry after my flight but taking one anyway; just to be polite. **

''**Thanks.'' I smiled appreciatively, taking a small bite out of the yummy brownie. She smiled back, and placed the plate back onto the small table. **

''**That's okay. So have you done much in LA so far?'' She asked me curiously. I wondered on what I should tell her about that…I mean, I hadn't really done much whilst I was in LA, besides meet Rob, of course. **

''**Well, I have a job working in an office, which I love.'' I admitted, because it was true. She nodded, listening carefully and asking my Uncle Arthur to get me a glass of water. I thanked them both when he came back into the room, and took a sip, putting it on small mat on the side table too. **

''**That's great news; your Mom was telling me that you met your hero too. Is that right?'' She asked me, smiling. **

**I looked at the floor shyly, and nodded my head. ''Ur…yeah, I met Rob Pattinson.'' I replied simply, not really wanting to go into much details about exactly what had happened between us over the past few weeks. **

**See, the thing is…now that I was out of LA, and here in Florida…it felt easier to think. I knew it was wrong in the way that I had left things with me and Rob, and I knew that I shouldn't have kissed him like that, and it was only whilst I was in Florida that I had realized my mistakes and wrong decisions. **

**And for that reason alone, I had a feeling that this stay in Florida might be what I needed to clear my head and think clearer about what I really wanted, what I needed, and what would be right in choosing. **

*******

**During my stay in Florida, I did lots of things during my stay there. I visited lots of places, and lots of cafes, and this was mostly because I couldn't stop thinking about LA and what I had left behind. **

**I couldn't seem to keep my mind off of Rob, and not just Rob but Nick too. This just made me more confused; longing for two Guys that were completely different and the more that I thought about it, the more that it gave me a headache. **

**So this was my reason for enjoying my stay as much as I possibly could, and trying not to think about the decision that I knew that I had to make when I got back to LA. **

**However, at night I would walk on the beach nearby my Aunt and Uncle's house and it was then that I started to wonder how everyone was getting on. I hadn't given much thought to my Girls in LA because I knew that if I did, I would only be upset when I thought too much of it; especially when it made me think about Rob. **

**I had stayed in Florida for a week now, and although I enjoyed my stay…the truth was, there was two Guys that I was really missing the most, and four Girls that I equally missed. Especially Rob and Nick. **

**My phone rang in my pocket, interrupting my trail of thoughts with the same song that I had said was mine and Rob's song. I blushed bright red in response at the trail of thought and got my phone out of my pocket, answering the unknown caller in confusion. **

''**Hello?'' I asked unsure. **

''**Ur…hey. I didn't expect that you'd actually pick up.'' Rob's stunned sounding voice admitted. I smiled in response, somewhat thankful to his call, my heart picking up speed furiously in my chest in response to hearing his voice and that equally stunning accent of his. **

''**I wasn't going to at first, to be honest. I don't answer unknown calls.'' I admitted because it was true. ''So what are you ringing me for, twilight bud?'' I added quickly, laughing it off as I asked him. **

''**Yeah er…sorry if I rang you at a…bad time. I know you wanted two weeks purely to yourself to er…think.'' He admitted, apologizing politely. **

**I smiled in response. ''No need to apologize.'' I promised him. **

''**Well…good. I guess I er…just wanted to talk to you.'' He admitted sheepishly, making me grin and blush in response. It was good to know that people were missing me as much as I was missing them. **

''**Aww, I see.'' I replied, giggling. ''Are the Girls driving you that mad already then?'' I asked jokingly, laughing it off and expecting him to laugh it off with me, like how he was usually good at doing. He didn't. **

''**Not the Girls, no.'' He replied grumpily, sighing heavily as he said it. I tried to work out what he meant, but I didn't quite understand. **

''**Then…who's annoying you?'' I asked him, confused. **

''**It doesn't matter.'' He replied, sighing again. **

''**Well it does. Who's put you in the mood?'' I asked him confused, wanting to know who was upsetting him. It couldn't be Kellan and Jackson after all, because they were great friends and they never fell out. **

''**He doesn't matter, I didn't call to talk about him anyway. Not really.'' He spelled it out for me. I worked it out, loud and clear. He had been talking about Nick, I was sure of it. Nick had been winding him up for some reason. **

''**Nick.'' I sighed heavily as he said his name in response. ''I've worked it out so you may as-well tell me now.'' I added, wondering what was bothering Rob so much about him. The whole reason that I moved away from LA was not only to give myself some time and space; but Rob and Nick too. **

''**Nothing, I don't want to stress you out too.''**

''**Well, I'm already stressed now, so you might as-well tell me!'' I told him, because it was true. There was no point about worrying about stressing me out now, when it was too late. As soon as I had worked out that it was Nick bothering Rob, I was stressed. **

''**I don't want to talk about it. I just want to talk to you, everyone's been sending me crazy here.'' He paused for half a second, before adding; ''I miss you a lot, you know.'' He added, spelling it out for me. **

**I smiled in response because I knew that it was true, and I knew that I felt the same too. ''Well…I miss you too…all of you, in fact.'' I admitted. **

**Rob paused for a second, and I waited patiently for his reply to that one. ''Even Nick?'' He asked me curiously. **

**I sighed heavily in response. ''Don't start. Please.'' I begged him, because if I told him the truth and told him that I missed Nick too, I doubted that this conversation would end very well. And I didn't want an argument, not with Rob. **

''**I'm just asking.'' Rob replied innocently. **

''**Well…look, okay. I missed everyone, like I told you. Yes, I miss Nick too okay, but I cant change the way that I feel.'' I admitted finally, waiting again for him to take that in properly. It took Rob roughly about five seconds to reply to that, though it seemed forever to me, if I was truthful. **

''**Okay.'' **

**I sighed, knowing that he wasn't happy now. ''You're wallowing now, aren't you?'' I asked him because I knew that it was true. When he gave one word answers, I could always figure that he was sulking. **

''**No.'' He replied, giving a one word answer again and backing up my confirmation. I sighed again, wishing he had never asked me the stupid question. **

''**Right, well I'll leave you to wallow then, speak to you whenever, bye-''**

''**-No, wait!'' Rob interrupted me, waking up from his sulking. ''I'm sorry.'' He apologized, making me sigh. He wasn't helping things by keep getting me pissed off, like this. **

''**I know.'' I replied. **

''**Can I text you later tonight? I'm going to cat-nap for a bit.'' He admitted, making me laugh in response. **

''**Sure, okay. I'll talk to you later then.'' I told him, watching my Aunt Joyce walk out from the house now and walk to the beach. **

''**Okay, bye.'' He agreed. **

**I turned round and smiled at my Aunt Joyce as she took a seat next to me. ''Let me guess…was that this Rob guy then?'' She asked me curiously. I frowned in response, quickly looking away so she wouldn't see. **

**She had been asking about Rob, just because I had told Mum that I had had a chance meeting with him. However Joyce had guessed that there was more into it than I was letting on; that I knew Rob as much more than a simple acquaintance, and of course she was right, but I wasn't going to tell her that. **

**To be honest, she was annoying me a little bit. She never contacted my family unless it was something that she wanted or if she had bad news, and she hadn't spoken to me since I was ten. If she was interested in me, then surely she would have tried to get into contact much sooner than she had now. **

''**No, just the Girls. I told you before anyway; I've only met Rob once.'' I reminded her, even though that was a lie. **

''**Ah, that's what you say.'' She replied, grinning at me. **

''**No, that's the truth.'' I replied sourly, frowning at her nosiness and looking away quickly. However, I felt guilty as soon as I had said that. ''Sorry, it's just that…I'm not a tell-teller. I hate it when people keep asking questions.''**

''**That's okay.'' She replied. ''I just want you to know that…well, if you need to talk to me, I'm here. I know that I haven't been much of an Aunt when it comes to keeping into contact, but…I want you to know that I really am glad to have you here.'' She promised me, making me smile in response now. **

''**Well…I'm glad to be here.'' I replied, even though I really missed LA a lot, right now. Especially certain people. **

*******


	36. Champagne

Within three days, I realized that I really wanted to go home now. I couldn't wait to the weekend anymore, because I needed to get back to LA and now. I accepted Aunt Joyce's plane tickets for me to use for one last time, and stepped onto the plane, three days early; knowing that I was doing the right thing in leaving now.

Rob hadn't contacted me since that night and he hadn't even text me that night. But that was okay, because I was planning to surprise everyone by going home early today. I had already rang Rachael that morning and asked her where they were going that night, and if they were doing anything special.

She had told me herself that everyone was going to the local club around the corner and that they were leaving at six, which gave me plenty of time to get home, get my stuff unpacked and get changed, ready to surprise them all at the club.

I hurried home at six thirty after my long flight and quickly showered and got ready to go out again, and meet them all at the club. I put on a club dress, which was a black color, and had small, delicate ruffles running down the dress, which was really pretty. It wasn't like what I'd normally wear, but I wanted to wear something nice tonight; I was out to impress one person only. Rob, hopefully.

That was if he still wanted me; that was. I walked out the front door after putting my high heels on, and making sure that everything looked okay. I got a taxi and walked into the club, feeling more and more excited with every step that I took.

Because I knew that now that I was back, I would do everything in my power to prove Rob that he was the one that I wanted, just as long as he still felt the same about me. He meant a hell of a lot to me, and I wanted him to know that I had made my decision, and that I was his; if he still meant everything he had said.

I looked around the club but I couldn't find any of them. Amongst the crowd of people dancing on the floor to the heavy, loud, club beat, the small desks surrounding the dance-floor, and the bar where everyone was waiting to get a drink; I found nothing.

I walked quickly upstairs, dying to get to everyone, especially that one, most important person to me; Rob. I looked around the other bar, before I went to the VIP area, and stood outside the front door, leaning in the door to see who was in there.

I looked about, finding Tasha dancing with Kellan, same as Rachael was dancing with Jackson; both of them looking so happy, bless them. That was why this move to LA was so good; I as so happy to see them happy.

Kirsty was sat on a red sofa with her Boyfriend Phil, looking totally and blissfully caught up in him, bless her. And then, as I followed the line of the red sofas on the left side of the room…my eyes stopped on Rob.

I sighed happily in response, feeling nothing but relief as soon as my eyes had found his face. The pain that had been aching in my chest, making it hard to think about anything but him had faded now as soon as I saw him.

He was wearing a thin, casual, white shirt, with no tie, and with three of the shirt buttons undone, showing part of his glorious, masculine figure underneath the shirt. I shivered delightfully in response.

He had on a black suite around him, and trousers and shoes to match, and he looked absolutely stunning; with his hair slightly windswept today from the use of his hands running through it all the time.

There was a Girl sat next to him, but I didn't pay any attention to her; I couldn't, not with my lover sat right in front of me.

I couldn't keep my eyes away from him, because he looked so beautiful; especially in the way that he laughed, his features lightening up as he did, and I knew that I couldn't be happier to see him until…

I gasped in shock as the blonde Girl next to him pounced and pressed her lips to his eagerly. He fell backwards, into the back of the sofa in shock, but he was kissing her back; that much I could definitely tell.

So much for never changing his feelings about me, the bastard! I was furious, and I actually wanted to go in there and punch him. I was so mad, I could have actually done something that I would have really regretted.

But as he pulled away to catch his breathe, he looked to me, to see me standing in the doorway. He watched me in shock, taking him half a second to get over the shock of me actually being here and seeing him do that.

''Charlie, wait.'' As soon as he had said that, I was running away. There was no way that I was listening to his lame excuses; I didn't want to hear it. It was obvious what he had been up to this week. Or should that be; who he had been up to?

''Wait, its not what it looked like.'' He called out as he chased me down the stairs. I huffed in response, sick of that excuse. That was the most overused one. He must have thought that I was stupid.

''Charlie, its not actually what it looks like. You should listen to him.'' I heard Tasha say, surprising me. If she backed him up, then maybe he was telling the truth; but I wasn't listening to it.

As far as I knew she could have just been lying for him, because they were now friends with Rob too. I wasn't going to stick around to hear the excuses that they made up, because I wasn't interested.

''Charlie, stop.'' I turned round in shock, feeling Rob grab hold of my arm. I looked down to see that he still had hold of my right wrist and I was not pleased now. I was seriously pissed and he had seconds to get off of me.

''You have five mille-seconds to get off of me.'' I warned him furiously, not caring that Tasha and Kellan could hear from behind me.

He sighed heavily in response, but didn't get off of me despite the advice I had tried to give him. He was more stupid that he looked for that, because my temper was about to seriously blow over in a minute and it wasn't going to be a pretty sight.

''I just want you to listen to me. It's not what it looked like; I promise you that we were just friends. It was the Girl that was there that night when I first went clubbing with you, and I thought that she understood that we were just friends.''

I looked back to Tasha and Kellan who were listening, and Tasha nodded, looking as though she was desperate for me to believe Rob. ''It's true Charlie, they've been friends all week, and Rob told her that that was all he wanted to be with her.'' She promised me.

''That kiss didn't mean anything to me, I promise. I was trying to pull away from her.'' Rob told me, making me feel furious with him again. He certainly had not been pulling away from her; maybe pulling her to him more like.

I huffed in response, shoving my arm back from him. ''You must think that I was born yesterday!'' I shouted at him furiously, not caring that people were starting to stop and stare, knowing that it was Rob.

''What, no! I want you, not her. I was trying to pull her away from me-''

''-You were pulling her to you more like.'' I interrupted him, huffing. I didn't care that Tasha and Kellan were still trying to tell me that it wasn't what it looked like, because I knew what my eyes had seen, and I wanted to shout at him, and make him realize that I was absolutely furious with him.

Because as far as I was concerned, there was to be no more us anymore. Not after the way that he had been flaunting her in this club. There was no more _us_ anymore, I was going to make sure of that.

''I think things started to get a bit intense.'' I carried on, shaking my head at him in disbelief. I was so mad with him, especially after he had broken my heart now.

''No, it wasn't-''

''I don't believe you!'' I told him, pushing him away as he tried to explain. He was a bare faced liar, and I couldn't believe I had let him break my heart. I could feel the tears slipping down my face in response to the hurt that I felt.

''I cant believe you would do this, to me, after you said that you wouldn't change your feelings about me-''

''-Please Charlie, can we go somewhere to talk about this?'' He begged me, taking hold of my wrist again. I snatched my wrist away and shook my head.

''No…no, you can leave me alone, that's what you can do.'' I promised him angrily. ''I don't want you to speak to me again.''

''Charlie-''

''-No, no. I think you've hurt me enough, thanks.'' I huffed at him angrily. I grabbed hold of a champagne glass; the closest thing to me and threw it over Rob as he tried to get to me again. He gasped in shock.

I didn't care though, because I was so hurt. Tears were still rimming down my face, and I was sobbing now. I just wanted to go home, because I felt so hurt and I already wanted to get out of LA, even though I had just got here.

''I thought you needed a cold shower.'' I spelled it out for him angrily, between my teeth; trying not to cry.

I turned and walked off then, ignoring the crowds of Girls who had gasped in response and were taking pictures. They could take as many pictures as they wanted, I wouldn't care. I was too hurt to care.

''Charlie, please-''

''-Leave me alone!'' I shouted furiously at him, before walking out of the club's front door and getting into the nearest taxi to go home. As soon as I was in the car however, them tears came spilling out uncontrollably and yet again, I was crying over having my heart broken….yet again. It seemed that that was all I was crying over these days and right now; I could see no way out of this situation anymore.

***


	37. Argument

I fell asleep as soon as I got into the house, because I was that exhausted from my tears that it was that easy for me to go to sleep. I woke a while later after hearing the front door slam closed. I jumped, and got up from my bed to see what the noise was.

I walked out of the bedroom, tip-toeing and hearing noise and voices from downstairs. I listened carefully to what I could hear they were saying.

''You're a fucking joke mate, why cant you take no for an answer?'' I heard Tasha say furiously. I listened more carefully, stepping down the stairs extremely carefully and as quiet as I possibly could.

''Tasha's right. You're not welcome here.'' Rob agreed, making me angry. Surely, he couldn't take no for an answer either, whoever he was talking to? I told him I didn't want to speak to him again, and he had rushed back to the house without a second thought.

Surely, he could give me a few days to get over him instead of coming round here as soon as he had broken my heart and forcing me to deal with it. It was beyond the point of unfair, and he was really making me upset about it, actually.

''Look, I just wanted to talk to Charlie.'' I gasped in shock, hearing Nick's voice. I raced downstairs and into the hallway to go and see him. It was me he wanted to see, so it was me that he could see.

''Rob already said you're not fucking welcome here!'' Rachael shouted in fury as I opened the kitchen door. I looked around the kitchen in shock, taking in the situation and what was going on here.

Rob was sat at the kitchen table, sat on them high chairs, and Nick was in front of him, leaning casually on the kitchen side. Tasha was sat next to Rob, and Kellan was standing up, next to her, and holding her hand.

And Rachael was next to Nick, having a awful go at him, shouting at him, and staring at him threateningly. It annoyed me; if anyone she should be having a go at, it was Rob not Nick. I was furious with Rob, and I found the energy in me to forgive Nick now.

Everyone turned round to look at me in shock and Rob and Nick's eyes both went wide at the same time, making me sigh in response. Rob had no chance if he thought that I was going to forgive him just like that, not after the way that he had behaved.

Yeah, I might be a pushover, and yes, I worshipped the ground that Rob walked on, but I wasn't going to forgive him after he had broke his promise to me. He could have the Girl that he was crushing on tonight, I didn't need him.

''Did you want to talk to me, Nick?'' I asked him. The others all gasped in shock in time together in response to the fact that I would actually give Nick a chance. Well, at least Nick hadn't forgotten about me like some people; he had only had a go at Rob, which I could understand why, right now.

''Are you actually going to speak to him? Actually going to give him a chance after the way that he's acted-''

''-I was speaking to Nick.'' I reminded Rachael sourly, interrupting her before she could carry on.

''Fucking speak to the idiot, then.'' She huffed furiously in response and shook her head. She looked away quickly and shoved her arms across her chest in response.

I ignored her sulking though and turned back to look at Nick, encouraging him to carry on. At least, he wouldn't cheat on me. It felt as though Rob had cheated on me, anyway; I mean, me and Rob had practically been together before my holiday, but he had soon forgotten about that. Typical Guy, really.

''Urm, can we go somewhere else? Outside maybe?'' Nick suggested nervously. I shook my head in response.

''No, whatever you need to say can be said here. We have nothing to hide, right?'' I asked him, because it was true. He nodded, smiling at me as hope flickered in his eyes. I sensed that he wanted me back, and right now, I felt the same.

And no, it wasn't just about Rob; it was about everything. He had meant a lot to me when we were going out with each other and Rob only turned out to be the Guy that I didn't think that he was.

At least, Nick was easy, simple, and he was a laugh too. He always managed to make me smile and laugh, and he was great company to be around. Just not when he was drunk, but I could deal with that.

''I wanted to apologize for when you were here.'' He admitted honestly. I nodded, smiling at him in encouragement to carry on with whatever else that he had to say. ''And er…I don't know if you know but I've been visiting the house quite a bit-''

''Huh, quite a bit! More like every day, you stalker!'' Rob replied furiously, shocking me. I turned back round and glared at him, surprising him now. Good, because I wanted him to know that I was furious with him.

''And what has it got to do with you, if he has? And I thought I told you tonight that I didn't want you speaking to me?'' I demanded angrily. He childishly locked his lips with his finger and shrugged. I watched him confused and watched him turn to look at Rachael.

''Tell Charlie, that technically I wasn't speaking to her, I was speaking to Nick, and if she wants to be childish, then so can I.'' Rob asked cheekily, childishly. I felt my face redden in temper this time, not blushing.

''Ur Charlie, Rob say that-''

''-Ha-ha!'' I replied sarcastically, turning back round to glare at Rachael now. ''You're not funny, you know Rachael.''

''I was only telling you what Rob said-''

''-Well you can tell him to fuck off, cant you?'' I demanded.

She turned away and looked at Rob. ''Charlie said fuck off.'' She told him honestly. I stood, waiting for his reply and trying not to lose my temper with them both. They were so fucking immature and it was not funny.

''You can tell her that I said that she's the one being immature, now.'' Rob replied; trying to joke around at my own game. I could tell that there was hope in his voice about me talking to him again, but he had no chance.

''Charlie, Rob said that-''

''-I'm not deaf Rachael. I heard what he said!'' I shouted at her furiously. I was so angry now, especially as he was twenty eight; six years older than me. So much for being the more 'mature' one.

''Alright, stress head!'' She complained, telling me that she was just as pissed off with me as Rob. I didn't care, because I was absolutely furious with both her and Rob.

''Well you can tell Rob that he's the immature one, being twenty eight. And that if he doesn't get out of this kitchen in ten seconds, I will do something that I fucking regret.'' I promised her furiously.

She stared at me for several moments, seeming shocked with my behavior tonight. I didn't care though; there was no way that I was going to let Rob break my heart anymore than he had done in the past.

''I may be your friend Charlie, but you're well out of order tonight.'' She told me angrily, making me huff in response. I wasn't going to take advice off of her. She was hardly the person to go to for love advice.

''And just for the record _darling_, it's a shame if you do take Nick back, because Rob hasn't done anything wrong. That Girl who he was with has actually been stalking him for the whole of last week.'' She told me, making me huff again in response.

Yeah, I believed her. Not.

''And he agreed to be her friend, and this one,'' she said, rudely pointing at Nick. ''Has been stalking the house for the whole if two weeks, for every single day.'' She carried on, whilst I was still trying hard not to do something that I regretted to either one of them.

''Rob has been down about it, as in really down. And do you want to know why?'' I shook my head, making her huff. I didn't want to know about him, because he was just making me more and more angry.

''Well tough, because I'm going to tell you anyway.'' She spelled it out for me. ''Because he's in love with you. He's madly in love with you and since you walked out of that door, he's been so down about you leaving.'' She spelled it out for me, even though I was sure that she was lying about that.

''Believe it or not, but that was the first time that we got him to go out clubbing-''

''-He seemed pretty happy to me.'' I interrupted her, because it was true. She shook her head and backed away from me in response.

''I'm not even going to bother talking to you, because I'll end up saying something that I regret.'' She walked over to Rob and surprised him by pulling him up roughly. ''Come on Rob, before she kills you. Or I kill her, either one.'' She added.

''What did she say last to me? You didn't tell me so I didn't hear.'' Rob joked, making Rachael sigh heavily in response.

''We're not playing anymore, Rob!'' She shouted at him, hitting him round his head and making him complain. Tasha laughed in response but as soon as I had turned to look at her, she stopped laughing.

Without another word, she walked out of the door, leading Kellan with her by his hand. I sighed heavily, trying not to cry as I realized that all of the Girls actually hated me. It was obvious, even Kirsty was nowhere to be seen.

As soon as I began to sob however, Nick held me in his arms, stopping me crying because I was in shock.

''Hey, it's okay.'' He whispered against my hair, but that just made me cry even more. I had lost my friends, and I hated Rob more than anything in this world, right now. He was acting like a bastard after the way that he had treated me.

Okay, so maybe I was acting like a spilt brat, but I was hurt and I had just wanted to punish Rob for hurting me like how he had tonight. Was that so much to ask for? And now, now I had lost all my friends; because they had actually chosen Rob over me.

''No, its not! My friends all hate me now, and Rob is acting so immature, and all I wanted to do was hurt him, because I was _jealous_.'' I finally admitted the real reason why it had upset me so much.

It was because I was jealous, I knew that. How could I not be jealous when he had meant a lot to me? Did he mean a lot to me now?

Yeah, of course.

Did I still _love_ him like before?

I couldn't tell you right now, because I wasn't too sure.


	38. Pain

I followed Nick to the front door, after we decided to give us a try, despite the fall-out. He still meant a lot to me, and I wanted to give us a try, I really did. I stopped at the front door and surprised Nick by gently leaning my lips up to his.

I kissed him once gently, and pulled away again; leaving him smile in response to my kiss. ''Wow.'' He commented happily.

I smiled back, knowing that I needed to tell him that I still wanted to take it slow. ''Uh huh, but if we go back out with each other then I want us to take it slow, okay?'' I asked him to make sure that he understood.

He nodded and leaned his face down to kiss me once more before he disappeared through the door, promising to text me in the morning. I turned back round to see the two people that I didn't want to see.

Rob and Rachael was standing in the hallway, and I could tell by Rob's face that he had seen it all. He was watching me in shock for a moment, before he shook his head and angrily threw the little, blue, jewelry box that he had been holding onto the floor.

''What's that?'' I asked Rachael confused. She huffed in response at me angrily, and shook her head. I watched her confused, still wondering why he had actually had a jewelry box in his hands for.

''That was your welcome home present that Rob had brought you ready for Saturday. He was about to apologize for his behavior tonight and beg you to forgive him, until you took that loser back.'' She spelled it out for me, making me shocked.

''I don't think that Rob will want to bother buying you anything else now, do you?'' She asked me sarcastically. She huffed at me as she walked out into the garden to try and find Rob. I gasped in shock.

I leant down ad picked the little box carefully in my hands, and opened the box up gently in my hands. Inside was a golden, heart necklace with silver stones running in the middle of the heart, where the heart split into two.

On one side, it said; _Twilight_ and on the other side, it said: _Buds_. Our name for each other, I remembered.

I fell to the stairs in shock, and let the tears surface again because I had been so heartless and cruel to him, and he hadn't done anything wrong, it seemed. He had actually brought me this; the nicest gift that I could have received from anyone.

Tasha walked out of the living room then and saw me crying. She sighed, and sat down next to me on the side of the stairs. ''Present didn't go well then?'' she asked me knowingly, putting her arms around me.

I shook my head, showing her the present. ''I know, I saw the present myself. In fact, I helped him engrave it for you.'' She admitted, making me feel even worse, if that was even possible. I tried to stop crying.

''I didn't mean to hurt him. I was just jealous!'' I admitted finally, throwing my head forcefully into my hands. I cried into my hand uncontrollably, knowing that it was far too late to change anything.

So, we couldn't be together, but I still wanted to be his friend, his twilight bud. Like that was going to happen after how I had treated him tonight. I didn't blame him for hating me; I was beyond cruel.

''_I _know that, but Rob doesn't, does he?'' She asked me, because it was true. ''And how do you think Rob feels when you accuse him of acting like that? Rob would never cheat on you.'' She told me.

I nodded, knowing that she was right but also knowing that it was too late to change things. Rob didn't want to know me anymore, that much was clear. And I was still mad with him with how he had acted in the kitchen

Yes, I maybe just a little immature, but I was younger than him. I was twenty two, and he was twenty eight, and he acted like an immature child when it came to arguments…still, I couldn't deny feeling guilty.

''Shall I go and speak to him then? Because right now, I don't think I can see another way in which he will forgive me. Can you think of something better?'' I asked her frantically. It was good to know that _she_ was still my friend, and it meant a lot to me, but…well, so did Rob. His friendship meant a hell of a lot to me and I was desperate to cling onto him in any way shape or form.

Because, the truth was; that was all I could do to hold onto him. He meant the world to me, and I knew that it was likely that he was never going to forgive me for this. I groaned, and threw my head into my hands again; crying heavier now.

''Charlie, Charlie, listen.'' Tasha asked me gently. I sighed and listened to hear what she had to say. I sobbed into my hands louder, not able to face her yet, because of the guilt. I deserved everything after how much I had changed.

''Just give Rob some space, and talk to him tomorrow. He'll be more understanding tomorrow.'' She told me, because she was right, after all. It would be better if I spoke to him later rather than sooner.

I knew that it would take him much longer than a day to calm back down again though, especially with the way I had treated him tonight. I didn't actually blame him if he never forgave me, after how due I had been to him.

''Okay.'' I forced myself to agree, sighing heavily as I forced myself to stop crying. She rubbed my back gently, trying to get me to feel better. It didn't much work, not after all the pain I had caused; especially to Rob.

''Go and get some good sleep, and I'll talk to Rachael in the morning, before you do. I'll give her some time to calm down first.'' Tasha explained, frowning as she thought about how pissed Rachael would be, morning or night.

''Thanks.'' I mumbled sourly, trying to sound as grateful as I could, because I was grateful; it was just that I didn't see things getting any better for me now, not with the way I had treated Rob, taking Nick back, and now due to the fact that Rachael hated me too.

I walked upstairs and fell into bed, crying myself to sleep about the change in me. I was shocked at how mean I could be, especially to the one person that had meant a lot to me; Rob, the one person that had meant the world to me before today and who I had promised to choose over Nick. And now look at me.

I had turned into a total bitch in one day.

***

I woke up feeling absolutely terrible, and not just terrible when you had a hangover terrible, but terrible as in you know that you've been really mean, a total bitch and don't deserve a chance kinda way.

It was too early when I woke up; it was nine am, and I wasn't going to work this morning. Even if I had been due in, I wouldn't have been going into work today, no matter what. I couldn't face anybody after my behavior last night.

I twisted and turned uncomfortably in my bed, trying to go back to sleep just so that I wouldn't have to go downstairs and face the aftermath of this morning. I was a coward as-well as a total, fucking bitch.

And then I heard Rob and Rachael's voice.

''Well don't worry, because if she says anything to you, there will be trouble. She still has me to face yet.'' I heard Rachael say, which automatically made me want to cry. I automatically wanted to run to England and get away from my behavior, but that was the easy route out.

If I was any friend, I would go downstairs now and face them head on, and apologize for my behavior. But I was too much of a coward to do that. I had to admit it because it was true; I was a complete waste of time.

''Rachael, I don't want any trouble.'' I heard Rob reply, sounding really awkward about it. Rachael huffed in response.

''Oh don't you worry, there wont be…as long as she keeps away from me.'' She spelled it out for him. I pressed my face into my pillow, covering it over my face and crying into it. I didn't want them to hear me crying.

As soon as they were gone, I released the pillow from my face and breathed in a deep, needed gasp of oxygen. I carried on crying then, trying to be as quiet as I could as each sob tore my body apart.

I held onto either side of my body and let each sob catch violently convulse my body movements. I would never get over this, not for as long as I lived. This was all my fault, in the way that I had treated Rob. I didn't deserve any respect for what I had done, and I knew deep down that nobody would ever forgive me again, for this.

''Charlie?'' I gasped in shock and automatically stopped crying as I watched Kellan walk into my bedroom unsure after knocking on my door. ''I'll go and get Tasha.'' He promised me gently, walking back out of my bedroom again quickly.

''No wait please, I just want to…'' I stopped though, because as I looked up, he was already gone. ''I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I just wanted to apologize.'' I admitted in between fresh new waves of tears.

I couldn't keep the noise down now though, because it felt as though I was in actual pain. My heart was killing me, or at least that's what it felt like. It felt like pure, sheer heartache and the more that I let the tears surface, the more it hurt.

''Charlie, come on.'' I was pulled up and into Tasha's arms, where I still cried. ''Stop it now.'' She told me, rubbing my back as I cried and cried and cried. But I couldn't…this was all my fault, and no matter what I did; nothing would be the same again.

''I don't even know what's wrong with me…my heart…it really hurts. Its stupid, isn't it?'' I asked her, because I knew that it was true.

''Do you want me to get Rob for you? So you can talk to him about it? Would that make you stop crying?'' She asked me, sounding panicked and as soon as she had said that, I shook my head; desperate for her not to get Rob.

He wouldn't want to talk to me, not after the way that I had treated him, and I didn't blame him. How could you, after the way that I had treated him?

''Please…just stay here with me for a minute, and then I'll be fine. I promise you.'' I promised her, trying so hard to stop myself from crying but failing again.

''Okay.'' She agreed, rubbing my back gently as I cried again. I didn't know what I wanted, which made me feel even worse. I wanted Rob…but I didn't know in what way any more. I wasn't too sure whether I wanted him as just a friend, or as a lover, but I knew that I wanted him here with me.

I had never actually hated myself more than I did in that moment, because despite the fact that I had Nick, I desperately wanted to make it up to Rob again.

***


	39. Apology

**I looked over the new letter that I had write for him in disgust. It didn't sound right, it looked stupid, and I wasn't happy. I ripped the letter up angrily and threw it into the bin. I slammed my head forward and into my hands as I tried to think of what to say on a new letter to Rob. What could I say?**

_**I'm sorry I acted like a bitch, but that's all in the past now. Why don't we move on act like nothing ever happened? **_

**Yeah, because that was going to look fantastic on the letter that was supposed to be my most heartfelt reply. **

**And cut, the sarcasm. **

''**Getting anywhere with your letter?'' Tasha asked me, poking her head round the door nosily. I shook my head and frowned at her unhappily in response, sighing heavily as I did. This was not going well. **

''**No. There's my bin of rubbish letters.'' I told her miserably; pointing to the bin at the side of the room. She sighed heavily, and walked into my bedroom to go and get the letters from the bin. She grabbed hold of a screwed up letter and read the rubbish that I had put on, and nodded. **

''**Okay….not bad.'' She admitted, making me huff in response. **

''**More like absolutely useless.'' I disagreed with her, huffing at my uselessness to write a fucking letter from my heart. **

''**All you have to do is write how **_**you**_** feel. Don't try and rhyme the lines or whatever; write down how you're feeling, why you're sorry about what you've done, that sort of thing. Although, I'd leave Rachael to me if I was you.'' She added knowingly. **

**I nodded, and watched her leave my room. ''Thanks Tasha…this means a lot.'' I promised her as she left my room. **

''**That's okay Chick.'' She called back before leaving me to write my letter. I took a deep breathe and thought hard about what I was going to write on this letter before I write it. It had to come from the heart, so it had to sound heartfelt and honest. In the end, I got this written down on my paper; **

**To Rob**

**I don't know what I can say in this letter to make my behavior right, and I understand if you throw this letter away. **

**I wanted to apologize for acting like the way I did, and basically…like a bitch. I'll be honest with you; I don't know what came over me that night. **

**Well okay…that's not exactly true either, because I do know what came over me. I was jealous.**

**I know that that's no excuse and I understand if you'll never forgive me, but it's the truth. I'm sorry for hurting you too. **

**You mean a lot to me and in hurting you, I hurt myself. I'm sorry and I understand if you don't want to talk to me. **

**I want to be your friend again, if I can, because you still mean a lot to me, and…well, I still love you. **

**And I know what you're probably thinking; that I had a funny way of showing it, right? You're right, but still; I love you a lot as my very best friend, and it would mean so much to me if you could forgive me. **

**If you want to speak to me, I'll be at home all day today, so please…just talk to me, if you can. **

**Love Charlie. **

I took it with me and posted in Rob's house before quickly walking back home again. I was too chicken to stay around at Rob's house when I knew how much he hated me. And I knew that he hated me, for a fact. 

Rob had made the effort not to visit the house from yesterday morning and Rachael was fuming with me because she blamed me for making Rob stay away from the house. That only made me feel more guilty, especially as Rob wasn't even talking to me. 

He wanted nothing more to do with me; that much was clear. But still, I couldn't stay away from him, even though I still had Nick as my Boyfriend again. Because, the truth was; I did still love Rob. 

I would have been quite happy to have a phone call off of him, a visit maybe; and it would make my day just to be friends with him again. He meant a lot to me, and I knew that I had hurt him badly, but it didn't stop me caring for him. 

I walked home and went straight to my room, knowing that I wouldn't get a reply for that letter. I was surprised when Tasha called me downstairs an hour later though. I smiled at her as I got to the front door. 

I looked at the newspaper on the side in confusion because it was folded over. I opened the envelope addressed to me, and read what it said on the small piece of white card. I sighed heavily, especially as it was written in Rachael's writing too. 

It said: 

**Happy now?!**

I turned back to the paper, confused and turned the paper over so that I could see the front of the paper. I sighed heavily in response, panic taking over me as I saw what they had written on the front page. 

_PATTINSON GETS A TASTE OF OWN MEDICINE_

_Whilst partying at a club two days ago, Robert Pattinson got a little er…wet. According to close sources, the star was heard having an argument with an English Girl inside the club in front of a crowd of fans. _

_It was unclear what exactly was said, but it was said to be an Ex of his who he had the argument with and as things got out of control; which ended up with Pattinson being soaked when the young Girl threw a glass of champagne over him. _

_We're sure that the co-star of his new film-Emma Simpson-wouldn't mind giving him a help getting him out of them clothes. We're yet to find out who this mystery Girl is that threw the champagne over Pattinson. _

It was all one thing after another with me, and I knew that this didn't do me many favors with Rachael. I sighed heavily in response, and sat down on the sofa in our living room, where Tasha was sat. 

I took it that Rachael was staying around Rob's house again tonight, then. She had stayed last night too, because she was absolutely furious with me. As if I hadn't done enough to infuriate everyone as it was without the fucking paparazzi helping along the way. 

''Take it that letter didn't go down too well then?'' She asked me curiously. I shook my head, keeping my eyes on the television even though I hadn't got a clue what it was; some chat show or something. 

I was only keeping my eyes on there and not looking back to Tasha-whose eyes I could feel on me-because I could feel myself getting more and more upset about this. I didn't want to cry again, not now. 

''That was from Rachael…the champagne incident is in the papers, and she's not happy.'' I admitted, clearing my throat awkwardly. Even Kirsty was next door with her Boyfriend, because she didn't want to spend time with me.

Even Kellan hadn't visited in the last day, and whose fault was it me? Mine, and I was for sure punishing for my actions now. Tasha didn't seem to notice Kellan's disappearance but I knew that she did really. He meant a lot to her. 

''You're joking?'' She asked me in shock. I shook my head, still managing to keep my eyes away from hers before I burst into tears. I didn't want to cry about Rob again, after all the tears and crying that I had been doing for the past day and a half. 

''Come here, you.'' She told me, wrapping her arms around me and hugging me. I couldn't believe that she was actually comforting me, supporting me after what I had done. She was the only one, and it meant a lot to me for her doing it. 

The doorbell rang though, making me sigh. ''I'll get it.'' I promised her, thinking that it was probably just someone selling things or whatever. I walked to the door, and dried my tears away from my face as I opened the door. 

It wasn't a salesman. It was someone who I definitely didn't expect to see after the way that I had behaved. I looked up in shock, taking in his dark blue jeans, and loose, white shirt that he had on. He had on an NY baseball cap and his sunglasses to keep undercover and I knew that I had missed him a lot more than I had realized before. 

''Rob.'' I sighed happily, wanting nothing more than to hug him or something. But I didn't…I stayed where I was, because I knew that I didn't deserve to hug him. I didn't deserve to be his friend or for him to even be here. 

He smiled at me sheepishly, walking slowly into the door, and surprising me as he wrapped his arms around me. I hugged him back instantly, because although this was a surprise; it was definitely a good surprise. More tears slipped past my eyes in response to him being here and I leaned into his shoulder, hoping that he wouldn't see that I was crying as I inhaled the perfect scent of him. 

''I'm sorry, its just…I missed you.'' He admitted sheepishly. I smiled against his shoulder, but I sobbed before I could stop myself. He pulled me away from him slightly; just enough to see that I was crying. 

''Why are you crying for?'' He asked me confused. I gasped in a deep breathe, trying to gather my thoughts and words enough to apologize to him as he gently rubbed the tears away from my face. 

''I'm sorry…for everything. The paper, the other night, I'm just sorry.'' I apologized, before I started crying again. He pulled me back into his arms and gently rest the his head on the top of mine. 

''It's okay…I forgive you. You mean a lot to me, that's not going to change.'' He promised me, taking my face into his hands. ''I love you.'' He promised me. I was just about to complain about that, and tell him what I needed to say, when he carried on speaking. 

''I don't mind if we cant go back to how we eventually were. I love you as my best friend, as more, and everything in between. I'm here in whatever way that you want me, because I cant stay away.'' He promised me, before gently pressing his lips to my right cheek. 

My eyes closed-enjoying the feel of his lips on my face, not wanting more, because this was enough. He pulled away and watched me sink that in closely. I smiled at him, lacing his hands with mine.

''I love you too…as my friend…and thank you for coming back.'' I thanked him because I was genially glad. It meant a hell of a lot to me for him to come back after how I definitely didn't deserve it. 

''As if I could stay away.'' He promised me, wrapping his arms around me again. ''You mean too much to me.'' He added, as he got something out of his pocket. I looked at him confused, to see that same jewelry box. 

I took one half of the necklace after he had given it to me and helped him put his own necklace on, after he helped mine. 

''I might look like a sissy, but I don't care. Two halves, fitting together.'' He explained, fitting the pieces together and breaking it away again as he took me back into his arms again. I wrapped my arms around him, wanting him to stay with me here for as long as possible. 

He meant too much to me now for me to ever let him go again, selfish or not. 

***


	40. Olivia's Opinion

I'd made up with Rob now, but Rachael still wasn't talking to me. And to make matters worse, Rob still wasn't visiting the house very much still, because he needed space to sort his head out, and give our friendship the space it needed right now.

Kirsty was barely on speaking terms with me and even Tasha was visiting Kellan around Rob's house. I went back to work, because I couldn't stand sitting around and doing nothing; thinking about what I had done.

It was two days into working there, and my story was going great, but that wasn't making me feel very great, even now. Because Rob was hardly speaking to me, and even when I did text him; he wouldn't reply.

I understood though; he still needed time to sort out what exactly was going on with us. I mean, we were always fighting and then making up again, but the thing was; he was right. There was only so much our friendship could take.

Our friendship was in tatters at the minute, but I had a feeling that it would get better; that is if I gave us both the time to think things out. I mean, there was only so much arguing that we could both take, and at the minute; I was being the immature one.

Because the fact was; I couldn't carry on denying my feelings for him forever. Rob knew that I was hiding the way that I _really_ felt about him, and so did I. But the question was…how long could I keep up the façade?

I took the golden heart-split from where Rob had the other piece still-and gently rubbed my thumb on the golden, shiny piece out of habit, as I swung from my chair in boredom. Olivia spotted me and laughed in response.

''Something bothering you, hon?'' She asked me curiously. I sighed and nodded, because…well, it might be good to ask for her opinion on what exactly was bothering me. She would know what to do; she usually did.

''Ur…yeah, kinda. I suppose you could say that…I have Guy trouble.'' I admitted, watching her as she took that in. She nodded, and rolled her eyes in response.

''Oh dear…always the worst troubles to have.'' She sighed heavily. I had to admit; she was definitely right on that one. ''Well…what's bothering you then?'' She asked me unsure, smiling at me.

I started from the beginning, telling her about the argument and what had happened the other night. She listened carefully, not making one single comment about everything until I was finished.

I told her about my friends getting involved too, and how everything had gone wrong with them, and she listened again, carefully, as I told her everything and hoped she could help me out. I needed advice from a different perspective.

''Wow…your life's more of a mess than I imagined. No offence.'' She quickly added. I smiled and nodded in understanding, begging her to carry on. ''Well…it's obvious about one thing.'' She added, making me confused. What was obvious exactly?

''You love Rob.'' I gasped in shock as soon as she had said that, because I hadn't thought…well, it was that obvious. ''I can see the way that your eyes light up when you talk about Rob. You're madly in love with him, Girl. It's obvious!'' She added, grinning at me.

''Well…I love Nick too-''

''-Sorry, but that's rubbish.'' She interrupted me, making me shocked. I looked back to her in shock, while she carried on talking. ''The way you speak about Nick…sorry, but…it sounds like you hold much more of a torch for Rob, rather than the way you feel about Nick.'' She added, smiling apologetically at me.

''But it also sounds like Rob is trying to do the right thing, by you too. I mean…it sounds as though he's only staying away because he feels like he has to. Because you've chosen Nick.'' She spelled it out for me.

I nodded again in agreement, and gave that some thought. She was right of course. I imagined the only reason Rob was staying away was because he thought he was doing me a favor. And he was…in some way.

It was making it easier for me to lie to myself, to tell me that Nick meant more to me than Rob did, when really…well, my feelings for Rob was the exact same for how I felt for Nick. And what was I supposed to do when I was in love with two people?

I had never felt this way before, with only one relationship under my belt, which didn't last long, didn't go very far, and definitely was not any way near as intense as the way that I was feeling about these two.

I was definitely no expert in the relationship side of life, and I hadn't got a clue about what I _should_ be doing for the right. I knew that this was a decision that I should have made ages and ages ago, however.

They both made me happy, there was no denying that. Whenever I was with both Rob or Nick, I always had a good time and I always felt happy with both of them. And they both made me laugh; Rob and Nick both had a good sense of humor and I enjoyed both of their company.

They were both really beautiful; more-so than anyone that I deserved. I both found them equally attractive, even if Rob obviously won because of his naturally beautiful looks, Nick was still very beautiful.

But there was definitely one thing that Rob won high above Nick. One thing I hated admitting to myself, even though I knew that it was true.

The chemistry, the undeniable need. It was still there, despite how much I tried to hide it. With Rob, I already _knew_ what I was missing. I had kissed him before, and the chemistry between us…well, all I could say was it was amazing.

The only way that I could describe it was like smoldering fire. As soon as we had kissed; that chemistry had churned into a much more needing, much more intense need. Even now; when I licked my lips, I could almost taste his on mine.

Whenever I was around him, I forced myself to ignore it, to put it behind me; but it was still there. That wanting, that needing, that burning desire to kiss him again despite the wrongness of it all. I was selfish, obviously.

Especially as there was hardly any chemistry between me and Nick, not compared to how there was with me and Rob. It was selfish but…it was true. There was no way that I could say that me and Nick's relationship came anywhere near to the intensity, the constant need that I felt when I thought about Rob.

But then the whole reason that I had refused to face up to my feelings for Rob was because it meant taking on too much. If I was to choose Rob over Nick then…well, there would be no way that I could get over him.

I had come to LA to meet him, but not fall as madly in love with him as I had. I had been obsessed with the Guy for years and I had wanted to get over him, but…well I would never be able to move on if I chose Rob, and I wasn't too sure if I wanted to fall deeper and deeper into this obsessive love that I felt for him, or choose the easy way out with Nick.

I sighed heavily as my mobile rang, and I forced myself to pick it up and answer it incase it was important.

''Hello?'' I answered my phone, still stressed about where my trail of thoughts had taken me just a moment ago.

''Hello, you.''

''Oh…hey, Nick.'' I replied, trying to sound happy that he had called me. I was quite happy, but…the trail of thoughts were still in my head. And it must have been obvious to Olivia; because she raised her eyebrows in response.

''You alright? You sound a bit stressed? Is work stressing you out?'' Nick asked me jokingly, laughing it off uneasily.

''Yeah, you could say that.'' I lied.

''Well…how about we meet up for lunch today, and I take your mind off of it.'' Nick suggested sweetly.

''Urm…yeah, okay. I'd like that.'' I agreed, even though what I really needed right now, was to get my head sorted out. That wasn't going to happen within a day though, was it? So what harm was lunch going to do?

''Okay, well I'll see you at your office at twelve.''

''Okay.'' I agreed, hanging up my phone. I sighed as soon as I had, because now I was going to have this to think about all day.

***


	41. London Offer

We eat lunch at a posh restaurant round the corner, because Nick had said that he wanted to 'treat' me today. God knows why though, I mean I couldn't understand why anyone would want to take me out for lunch, treat me when I was a complete and utter bitch.

No, change that. When I had _changed_ into a complete and utter bitch.

I absolutely hated myself for what I was doing to everyone else; Rob especially. And it only made me feel worse as I sat here and made small talk with Nick, enjoying myself when I knew that Rob wanted answers.

Especially when I was feeling the way that I felt too. I was listening to Nick speak, but…it wasn't really going in properly. I wasn't actually properly listening, because the fact was…I kept thinking about Rob, thinking up mad reasons to ring him just to hear his voice again.

I mean, what on earth was wrong with me, when I had everything that I needed in Nick. He was the one to comfort me even after I had admitted that I had been _jealous_ of Rob and this blonde Girl.

And the thing was, I didn't quite catch what Nick was saying because of all my crazy, mixed up thinking, but I was slowly starting to wonder what he was talking about…especially when I got a shock with what he was talking about.

''Yeah, I mean…it will be good to see London again.'' My head darted up from my mushroom ravioli in shock then, and I watched him confused; trying to work out what he had been talking about again.

''Ur…what was that again?'' I asked him in shock. I was sure that I hadn't heard him right, but then…he definitely said _London_, and definitely not _Los Angeles_. But what was he talking about exactly?

''Well, I stayed in London for a while, before I went to LA. And I know that you'd enjoy London too.'' He admitted, smiling at me. I was still confused though; why was he going on about London for? Was he planning a holiday there for us or something?

''Wait…why do you keep talking about London for? Are you planning a holiday for us?'' I asked him confused. I had totally missed the conversation all together so I was just a little confused where London came into it.

Nick laughed in response, rolling his eyes as he did. ''Honestly Charlie, I was only explaining to you five minutes ago. I wondered why you were keeping quiet when I was telling you.'' He joked, clearing his throat as he planned to explain to me again.

''What I said was; I've got a job in a west end stage in London.'' He admitted, spelling it out for me. ''I've already looked into houses and there's one right nearby the theatre; dead cheap and it has four bedrooms there too. Charlie?''

I had gone into shock mode, totally frozen in the café chair with my head in my hands in despair. I groaned as I thought about the choice that I would soon have to make. After all, I couldn't string along Rob when we went back to London.

I would have to make a decision to either stay in LA with Rob, or go back to London with Nick. It would be a difficult choice, especially with my family in London and friends-if that's what they were now-in LA.

''Ur…yeah. Sorry, its just a shock, that's all.'' I admitted, because that much was true. Now I had that to panic about; choosing over who I wanted to be with and who I wanted to stay with, and not only that but I also had to tell the Girls and Rob too.

And that was bound to go down excellently, seemed the Girls absolutely adored Nick, and…end the sarcasm. Because the truth was; the Girls really _didn't _like Nick. I understood that the best that I could though; because I knew that they much preferred Nick to Rob.

''Of course…I understood that it was going to be in a shock, that's why I told you now, out of the way; to give you time to think about it.'' Nick admitted, smiling at me in reassurance as he took my hand in his.

I smiled back shyly, too busy thinking about how I was going to tell Rob this now, rather than get myself excited about this idea to move to London now.

***


	42. Party?

_**I had convinced myself to stay quiet about the move to London for the minute, because tonight was going to be special. Tasha had convinced everyone somehow to visit the house tonight and have a party round at the house; but Nick had other ideas when he heard that we were having a party. **_

_**I was not happy with his choice though, because I wanted tonight to be special; with no arguments, nothing bad. Because I wanted to prove to them all that I was sorry and at least try and make up for my behavior.**_

_**If Nick went into the house, blabbing about his idea to move to London together, with me; then it was bound to only cause more arguments between the group; something that I really didn't want happening, not tonight when we were all back together again. **_

''_**I don't know why you're so panicked for. Everyone will come around to the idea eventually.'' He added, trying to make me happy. It didn't though, because I didn't want everyone to just 'come round' to the idea. **_

_**I wanted everyone to be happy**_** for me. And I knew that if I did choose to go back to London with Nick, then the Girls would definitely not be happy for me, and things were going to turn ugly when we got into that house. **

''**I don't want them to just eventually accept my choice. I want the Girls to be happy too.'' I told Nick, because it was true. He sighed, and reached over his car and took my shaking hand in mine. Shaking, because I was yet to face Rob. **

''**They'll understand; as long as you're happy they will be.'' He promised me, because it was true. He kissed the back of my hand gently as I thought of possible ideas to run into the house and keep Nick outside for at least ten minutes so that I could get Rob on his own to speak to him first about it. **

**He pulled the car over by the side of the road and just outside the house, giving me a chance to look at it nervously. I wasn't going to be looking forward to this; facing everyone when they found out. **

**I had already put on a different dress; one that I had brought today for the party. It was blue, like satin and was really pretty. It was strapless but I had put on the blue straps because I didn't much like strapless dresses. **

**I had a feeling that my face showed the panic that I had been trying to hide too, because Nick chuckled in response as he shut my car door behind me, after opening the car for me. He kissed me once, and took my hand in his. **

''**Stop panicking; they'll understand.'' He promised me, kissing me on the forehead as he lead me to the front door. He was wrong of course, but I just nodded and smiled; pretending to agree with him. **

**Tasha opened the door thankfully and smiled at me, and forced a pleasant smile at Nick, even though I knew that it was false. and I knew why too. Because the Girls still didn't quite understand why I was still with Nick and not Rob. They had a point. **

''**Hiya Guys.'' She said politely, letting us walk into the front door and following her through the house. ''You look pretty Charlie.'' She commented. I smiled happily in response, glad she noticed. **

''**Thanks Tasha, so do you.'' I replied, because it was true. I looked to Nick to see him get out the glass of white, lambrini wine that he had brought for Tasha; because he had wanted to get something that she liked. **

**I smiled at him in encouragement; telling her to give her the wine, but he seemed to be struggling with his nerves. I rolled my eyes in response and took the bottle of wine off of him. She would soon be happy when she saw this. **

''**Tasha, Nick brought you a glass of wine. You're favorite; lambrini.'' I added, grinning at her as she turned around and looked at us in slight shock. ''Nick knew how difficult it is to get the lambrini in America, so he took the time to buy you you're favorite.'' I added, trying to do some serious sucking up. **

''**Oh,'' she replied in surprise. ''Thanks Nick.'' She added, grinning at him, as she took the bottle of wine from me. I smiled at Nick in reassurance; seeing that he was nervous now, and he smiled back at me panicky. **

''**Can we tell the Girls later…after we've had a bit to drink? I think that way it will be better.'' I added hopefully-whispering in Nick's ear-because the truth was; I was too nervous about telling everyone for the minute. **

''**Okay, if it makes you feel better.'' Nick agreed easily, grinning at me as he kissed me on the cheek. I smiled, and looked to see Rob walk out of the hallway; and just in time to see Nick kiss me on the cheek too. Great fucking timing. **

''**Rob.'' I called his name delighted, pulling away from Nick easily and walking over to go and see Rob. I was out to do some serious begging tonight in order to make up with everyone; especially Rob. **

**He looked at me in shock, taking in what I was wearing and causing me to blush bright red as he looked carefully about exactly what I had on. I just hoped that Nick really didn't notice that. I didn't want an argument tonight. Especially not between these two. **

**I looked back to Nick though to smile at him and make sure that he knew that I was doing. He smiled back, watching me the whole time as I stepped over to Rob. I took in what Rob was wearing too, whilst I was here. **

**He had on a very fitted, black vest which looked really good on him. As in **_**really**_** good on him. He had on some dark jeans, and some black, polished shoes to match, but it was his face that I couldn't stop staring at. **

**His perfect features were unreadable through his poker face, though I doubted that that was a good thing. His messy, gold-blonde hair wasn't spiked up today; it was flat, but still messy where he had ran his hands through the top of his hair erratically. **

''**Hey, you look nice.'' He complimented me, making me smile. I was glad that people liked my dress after I had convinced myself to get it; daring myself to get something a little bit girlier than usual. **

''**I like it, but…its not really me.'' I admitted, because it was true. ''It's a bit er…girly.'' I added, blushing bright red as I looked down at myself. I looked back to Rob and smiled at him through my embarrassment. **

''**Yeah, I er…think that you look really nice.'' He replied; looking over my dress once I wasn't going to say something, that was until I heard a smash behind me. I looked behind me confused, to see that Nick was watching us in shock. **

**He had dropped the plastic bag which had been full of bottle of WKD to try and make it up to Rachael. And he was watching us as though someone had shot him or something. I sighed, and looked to see Tasha walking back into the hallway. **

**She frowned at Nick in response, though I presumed that that was only because Nick had done it and not anyone else, but I wasn't going to say anything about it. It was a little annoying that he had dropped my present for Rachael. **

''**I'll do that, Tasha.'' I told her, trying to take the mop that she had got out from the bucket, as she tried to mop up the WKD mess on the floor. **

''**No, I'll do it.'' She told me, sounding slight pissed off. I nodded, leaving it be straight away, because I felt guilty about it. I walked back over to Nick and took his hand; moving him out of the way of Tasha to clear up. **

''**Well shall we go in the living room? I hear that's where the party is.'' I added; trying hard to lighten the awkward mood between the four of us. Rob nodded, smiling politely at me in response. **

''**Yep er…why don't you walk in with me first Charlie…because of…Rachael.'' He spelled it out for me, changing an apologetic smile at Nick. He looked really sorry for asking what he had to do, but then I knew that he had to with the way that Rachael was, right now. **

**I nodded, understanding what he meant straight away, and following him through the hallway to the living room, apologizing to Tasha on the way who just nodded in response. ''Urm…why cant I walk in the same time as Charlie?'' Nick asked us confused, from behind us. **

''**Because of Rachael.'' I spelled it out for him, trying to be quiet so that nobody heard me in the living room. I definitely didn't want to have another argument with Rachael; not after the other night. **

**He nodded, watching us suspiciously as we walked into the living room where everyone was in fact partying. Rachael was dancing in the middle of the room, laughing as she danced with Jackson. **

**Kellan watched, cheering her on and laughing as he watched from the sofa, and Kirsty was grinning at her; sitting next to her Boyfriend Phil and watching her from the sofa too as she danced to **_**Low**_**. **

**However, as soon as she saw us at the door; Rachael's smile slipped. She stopped dancing straight away and turned back to her WKD. And everyone else stopped laughing too; avoiding my gaze as I walked into the room with Nick following us far too soon. **

**I sighed heavily, feeling so guilty for being here now. Why couldn't I fucking stay in Florida! I wished I'd never come back to have to deal with this fucking lot. It was just getting me more and more down. **

**Rob smiled at me in encouragement, stopping me from wanting to try and run from the room as soon as he had placed his right hand in my left hand. He gave it a gentle squeeze, before quickly pulling his hand away so that Nick couldn't see. **

**I walked forward and took a seat next to Nick on the spare sofa. Rob took his seat on the floor, next to my feet, and as soon as he was sat on the floor; I felt guilty about the lack of seating in the room. **

''**Do you want to sit on the sofa, Rob? I'll sit on the floor.'' I asked him quietly. I refused to look at anyone else but him as I waited for his answer because the room was awfully silent, over the flowing music. **

''**No, that's okay. You stay on the sofa.'' He told me, smiling at me. **

''**It's okay, I'll sit on the floor-''**

''**-No, I insist.'' He promised me after interrupting me. He kept his intense gaze with mine, still smiling as I blushed and looked away quickly. I felt Nick's eyes on me in response to the way that me and Rob were acting, but I refused to look at him. **

**What was I to do? I mean Nick knew that I was going to be doing some serious sucking up tonight, with everyone; no matter what it took to suck up to everyone. I would try and be the good friend that I wanted to be. **

''**Do you want a drink?'' I looked up in shock to see Rachael looking at me. As soon as I had looked up at her, she smiled the best that she could even though I knew that it was hard for her to try and be nice to me. **

''**Urm…can I have a bottle of WKD please…is that okay?'' I asked her unsure as she walked back to the table, stood in the middle of the room and filled with all the drinks ready for tonight; with a large bowl too, to put the punch in. **

**She nodded and grabbed me a bottle of WKD, opening it for me. She handed it back to me without a word. **

''**Thanks.'' I replied quickly, before looking away just as quickly. I sipped my bottle of WKD and watched as everyone went back to enjoying themselves and having an actual party again. I happily sat back and watched because it kinda felt like that that's what I should be doing tonight instead of sharing the laughter. **

**Nick budged up in the end, giving enough room on the sofa for Rob to sit but he wouldn't budge from the floor. I sighed heavily and hit him round his shoulder again, because I wasn't going to give in. **

**I knew that the floor wasn't the comfiest place to sit on. He gave in, in the end and sat down on the sofa too. There was still a bit of room between us, on the sofa, which was good. I smiled shyly at Rob as Nick got up to head to go and get another beer. **

**Rob leaned forward and pressed his face to the right side of my face so that he could talk to me. However; that was only because the music was really loud in the living room. I had already known that. **

''**Are you enjoying the party? Despite how awkward I know it is for you?'' He asked me worriedly. I laughed quietly in response and nodded. **

''**It isn't too awkward now; not with you here anyway.'' I spelled it out for him. He grinned in response, happy with my reply. **

''**Well, I'm glad. This party was kinda for you.'' He admitted, shocking me. I looked at him, confused. ''It was my idea; I wanted to make it up to you after the last few days.'' He added; confessing. **

''**Wow…well, thank you. That means a lot.'' I replied, because it was true. He smiled and pulled away just as Nick came into the room. I clearly heard Rob sigh in response and turn away again, making me feel a little sad. **

**Once we were all in the living room, the partying began. I got quite a bit drunk, but it definitely made me feel less panicked, which was good. I was out to party tonight, with my friends; and as soon as I was slightly drunk, I apologized to Rachael. It felt the drink was letting me want to apologize how I had wanted to. **

''**That's okay…now, I think we should do dares!'' Rachael exclaimed excitedly. I laughed awkwardly in response, knowing that that wasn't a very good idea at all; not with her ideas for dares anyway. **

''**I don't know, Rach.'' I commented unsure. **

**She shrugged. ''Well you don't have to do dares, if you don't want to.'' She admitted coldly, making me feel a little annoyed. My apology had clearly gone down the drain, and now I had to sit and watch the others to dares. **

**She dared Kellan to take his top off; and being as casual as he was, he did it. Making Tasha blush brightly in response. I laughed, unable to stop myself. Rach totally ignored giving Nick one…especially as he very drunk. **

**But it was embarrassing, because Nick noticed, because he was so drunk…and he said something about it. ''Ur…what about me?'' He asked her annoyed. I sighed and shook my head at him, because I didn't need Rachael getting annoyed.**

''**What about you? Do you really think that I invited **_**you**_** into the dares? No, because you're only welcome here because of Charlie.'' Rachael huffed at him, spelling it out for him angrily. I sighed in response. **

**Nick prepared himself to get up off of the sofa, because he was drunk, but I stopped him. ''Please…just don't.'' I begged him, because I didn't want any arguments starting out. He sighed and nodded, sitting back into the chair. **

**Not only was it not worth it, but Nick could be awful when he was drunk. I didn't want them to argue, especially tonight. So I was just glad that Nick was being good, and agreeing with what I asked him. **

**That meant a lot to me, especially as I knew how argument Rachael could be when somebody pushed her to it. **

**I watched Rachael supply the Guys drinks with more alcohol and I could only watch as she pulled Rob into the middle of the room after they had done dares, and force him to dance with her and Jackson. He laughed embarrassed, running his hands through the top of his hair but still dancing with her and Jackson. **

**I sighed, wishing that I wasn't being pulled back. I wanted to dance with Rob because he was on his own almost, what with Rachael being with Jackson. But I knew that wouldn't look right; not with me being with Nick. **

''**How about we dance too?'' Nick asked me, taking my hand and getting up from the sofa. I watched him in shock as he tried to pull me up with him, but I wasn't going to budge anytime soon. **

**I hated dancing, and Nick was far too good at dancing anyway, so I didn't want to be made a show of us next to him. I shook my head to say no, because I hated dancing anyway; whether he was a star dancer or not. **

''**I don't want to.'' I admitted, because I didn't. **

''**Well, why not?'' He asked me, annoyed. **

''**Because I don't. For starters, I hate dancing and you're really good at dancing anyway.'' I spelled it out for him, because it was true. I didn't want to dance with someone as good as him and made a fool of myself. **

''**All I want is one dance with my Girlfriend.'' He spelled it out for me, kissing me gently on my right cheek. I smiled, still not wanting to dance. **

''**Well…later, please.''**

''**She says she doesn't want to dance. Isn't that clear enough for you?'' A very drunk Rachael warned him from the middle of the room. I looked round at Rachael to see her glaring at Nick. Rob looked just as uncomfortable as Jackson. **

**I sighed, looking away quickly and pulling him back onto the sofa before he could say anything more that he regretted. He had said more than enough tonight, helping wind Rachael up as it was, already. **

**Nick didn't look happy, but I wasn't sure what I could do to make it up to him. Rachael was like me in that way; when she lost her temper, it was better just to let her get on with things and let her get over it. **

**But I knew how uncomfortable it was, having to sit through her moods, because I had done it plenty of times beforehand when we were in colleges. Tasha and Kirsty just let her get on with things, but I found it all uncomfortable to watch. **

**We went outside in the end, after Rachael, Kellan, and Rob wanted to have a cigarette and just when everything started to seemed like it was going okay again…Nick had to say it, because he was drunk, and ruin everything. **

''**Me and Charlie have something to tell you Guys.'' He admitted after they had finished. Rachael looked back to us in shock, and I glared at Nick in response, feeling very angry now about what he had said. **

''**No we haven't, shh.'' I asked him annoyed, making him sigh in annoyance. He probably guessed that I would have backed out after it, but what did he actually expect? He couldn't just blurt it out like that in front of everyone. **

''**Charlie, you promised me that we'd tell them later.'' He reminded me because it was true. I didn't care though; now was **_**so**_** not a good time. **

''**Do you really think that now's a good time?'' I asked him after everything that had happened already tonight too. **

''**Yes, I do. Because you're not going to tell them any other time-''**

''**-Yes, I will. All I need is a bit of time to get over this myself, then I would tell them.''**

''**No, you wont-''**

''**-Well, what is it then?'' Rachael asked us; interrupting Nick's moaning. He turned to look at her and grinned. **

''**I don't want you telling them now. Leave it until I'm ready.'' I begged him, hoping that he would do it…but he didn't. He just sighed in response, as if to say that I was being difficult about this or something. **

''**I want to tell them now.'' He spelled it out for me. I sighed in response, and turned to look at Rob after feeling his eyes on us. I smiled at him apologetically and looked to the floor; waiting for Nick to brag about his London plans. **

''**I have got a job in London's West End in a show, and I'm moving to London to pursue it.'' Nick admitted, sounding like he was going to burst with pride. I sighed heavily in response to that; feeling proud of him, but wishing he couldn't do this now. **

''**So…why the big news, I don't understand.'' Rachael admitted, confused. I looked up to see her watching Nick confused and unimpressed, but I looked back at Rob to see that he had definitely already guessed. **

**His face showed the pain, showed the way that he didn't want me to go with him, and I could clearly see it. And just seeing his pain made me feel even more guilty. I looked away quickly; not being able to stand his pain. **

''**Well obviously Charlie will be moving in with me.'' He spelled it out for everyone, and I clearly heard everyone gasp in shock. **

''**You're not actually moving to London with him, are you?'' Rachael asked me in shock, sounding disgusted with the idea. **

''**Well no…I haven't actually said yes to moving yet.'' I replied, looking back to Rob to spell it out for him. He was still in pain due to this fact, I could see that. And because of his pain, I hurt too. **

''**No, you said that you were moving with me today. Everything's summed up.'' Nick spelled it out for everyone, even though that wasn't totally true. **

**Rob huffed in response and pushed past us in his eagerness to get back into the house and away from us, and I couldn't blame him. But I couldn't stop myself from wanting him to stay and hear me out too. **

''**Rob wait, please.'' I begged him, trying to hold him back. He shoved his arm away from me and shook his head. He walked into the house quickly, huffing angrily as he did in response to the news. **

**I sighed in response. ''Right, that's just great, that is.'' I told Nick sarcastically, feeling so angry with him for dropping that shock on everyone like how he had. **

**I could feel myself getting more and more worked up in response to Rob walking out and the way that this news had been told. Nick obviously hadn't thought about that. ''So, thanks a lot Nick.'' I huffed at him angrily, because I had tried and tried to tell him not to say it. He sighed in response, but I was already through the door; trying not to cry as I looked for Rob to go and speak to him. I needed to speak to him, before he got the wrong idea. **

*******


	43. I want?

I walked into the front garden to see Rob smoking another cigarette outside. He was sat on the wall; his hands shaking in fury to the news, and his face dropped. I sighed in response and tried to be quiet as I walked over to him…it didn't work though.

''So…are you going with him then?'' He asked me, as if he expected out a honest yes. Well, he wasn't going to get one, because right now; I definitely didn't want to go to London with Nick at all.

''Not at the minute, no.'' I admitted, taking a seat next to him on the wall, and being careful because of my satin dress. ''I hadn't said yes to going with him, and I hadn't said no either.'' I added, because it was true.

''Why not?'' He asked me, surprised. He didn't look up at me though, and I desperately wanted to take his hand in mine or whatever. But I couldn't; he was furious with me, and it was my time to explain.

''Because I haven't decided yet.'' I admitted, because it was true. I huffed to myself as I remembered just how Nick had been controlling today. I had seen a new side of him; that was for sure.

He had told everyone that I was going to London as though it had been decided or something even though we hadn't even talked about it. Even when he told me about London; it was like he actually expected me to come with him.

But he hadn't even asked me to. He had _expected_ me to say yes and jump at the chance to move to London and choose him over my own friends. I mean…was he just plain fucking stupid or something?

He had no idea about my feelings for Rob and about the fact that I was actually considering my relationship with Nick. I mean, I didn't want to hurt Nick, but he had no right just to just presume things.

''I'm just as angry as you, if you want to know.'' I added, watching Rob's head dart up a tiny bit in response. ''It's true; I had no idea he was going to just tell everyone like that.'' I admitted honestly.

''And he had no right to do that. We should have talked about it properly first, but we didn't. Do you know that he didn't even fucking bother to ask me first either? He just presumed that I would be moving with him to London.'' I told him, huffing angrily as I thought about this.

''Well you should tell him.'' Rob replied, sounding just as angry as me. ''Has your idiot of a Boyfriend even realized…doesn't matter.''

''Tell me. Has he realized what?'' I asked him, begging him to tell me. I wanted to know what he was going to say.

''It doesn't matter.''

''It does to me. Has he realized what?'' I asked him again, touching the side of his arm with my right hand. He hesitated, looking back to me finally, and watching my face carefully for a moment, before sighing.

''I was going to ask…if he even realized that you're having regrets.''

''Regrets about what?'' I asked him, trying to act like I didn't know what he meant. I knew exactly what he meant really.

''About you and him, moving to London…I wanted to know.'' He admitted, watching me as I took that in. I let go of his arm instantly, and pursed my lips together; trying to give him a truthful reply.

''Well er…he hasn't realized anything at the minute. I don't think he even noticed it, and…well, I don't know if I er-''

I stopped dead after I felt one of Rob's hand fall to one side of my face. I gasped and looked round at him in shock. He smiled sheepishly about being caught and concentrated on my face as he watched me.

''I'm not going to give up…proving to you that its _me_ that you want.'' He confirmed, beginning to lean his face forward to mine. I gave in instantly, leaning closer to him too, and wrapping my arms around his neck, preparing myself for the kiss that I wanted…

''Charlie?'' I sighed heavily in response to hearing Nick's voice and forced myself to pull away. Rob grabbed hold of my arm though, and tried to pull me closer, but I wouldn't have it. Nick didn't need to find us like this, even if I was going to choose Rob over Nick. I mean, it wasn't fair on Nick to see this.

''I cant…he cant find us like this, even if I do decide to break up with him.'' I spelled it out for Rob. He sighed and forced himself to nod his head, knowing that it was true. ''I still feel the same.'' I added, promising him as I kissed him gently on the cheek.

He turned his head after I had kissed him, and pulled on my arm…daring me to kiss him in front of Nick. But I couldn't do that to Nick, no matter how much I wanted to. I smiled and forced myself to pull away again; which was difficult to do.

I say forced, because it was just too difficult to resist that chemistry, that amazing pull to Rob; that he had over me. Every time that I got closer and closer to him, it was hard not to kiss him…not to resist that temptation.

I watched Nick walk out of the garden and head towards us instead. He didn't look very happy, but right now; I didn't really care. Because I was absolutely furious with him, right now. Telling everyone like that.

''We need to talk.'' Nick told me, as soon as he was at my side. I huffed in response to that, shaking my head furiously.

''No; I need to talk, and you need to listen.'' I told him furiously. It was about time that he started listening to me for once, instead of assuming things. His eyes widened in shock and confusion, but I didn't care.

He had pissed me right off, and now he was in trouble. Because there was no need for the way that he had spoken about London to everyone.

''Why…I mean, what's wrong-''

''What's wrong!'' I laughed once in a sarcastic manner. He had a cheek; especially as he genially sounded confused. ''I'll tell you what's wrong; you presume that I _want_ to go to London, that's what's wrong. I don't want to go to London, I want to stay in LA, is that clear enough for you?'' I shouted at him furiously.

He frowned and looked back at Rob. ''You should go instead of listening in, into our conversation.'' He warned him furiously.

''Ugh, I don't think so mate-''

''-It's not up to you to tell me to go, is it?'' Rob interrupted me. ''If Charlie wants me to go then I will.'' He added angrily, stepping around me to get to Nick. He glared at Rob angrily, trying to push him away, but I had already pushed Nick away.

''Don't push my friends away, or there really will be no _us_.'' I warned him angrily. He sighed, smiling apologetically at me. I huffed in response, and turned to look away from him. I was not happy.

''Charlie, I'm sorry, but…you don't honestly believe that, do you?'' Nick asked me, trying to immediate me. I huffed in response, and pushed him away from me more furiously than before now.

''What, you don't believe me do you? What, shall I dump you now then-''

''-I wasn't talking about us being over. I was talking about you and Rob…being _friends_. I think we both know that there's a lot more going on here between you two, right now.'' Nick admitted because it was true.

''Don't fucking use it as an excuse, Nick.'' I shouted at him, pushing him away from me again. I was absolutely furious with him and the more that he talked, the angrier I got. He had no right presuming things about me and Rob when he hadn't even noticed mine and Rob's closeness before.

''Do you know what…I've had enough.'' I spelled it out for him, walking past him and trying to get to the house. He grabbed hold of my arm and stopped me. I pushed him away from me furiously.

''Give me some fucking space Nick, before I really start to question our relationship. You have no right assuming things about me and Rob when you've been so wrapped up in yourself anyway.'' I spelled it out for him angrily.

I walked back into the house leaving Nick and Rob there because I needed to chill out and now. I was far too fucking angry to talk to anyone, right now. I walked past Tasha in the hallway, and she could see how angry I was so left me to walk upstairs to cool down.

I slammed my bedroom door closed behind me, and sat on my bed, throwing my pillow furiously on the floor. I stayed in there for ages, trying to calm myself down before I went downstairs to face Nick, because I would only do something that I regretted right now.

''Charlie?'' I heard Rob call through my bedroom door. I gasped in shock, happy now. Because if it was Nick, I would have definitely did something that I regretted. I wanted Rob though, not Nick right now.

I walked up to the bedroom door, where he was standing hesitantly. He smiled at me shyly, not sure if I was still angry. I smiled back happily, knowing who I wanted now, and what I wanted to do.

I took his face in my hands, knowing what I wanted. His eyes widened in shock, as I leaned closer; wanting to kiss him. I didn't want Nick anymore, not after the way that he was starting to act.

''Charlie, wait, wait.'' He begged me, pulling my hands away from his face. I watched him confused, wondering why he was stopping me for. Just fifteen minutes ago, he had wanted me to kiss him.

''You want Nick-''

''-Like hell do I!'' I interrupted him, because it was true. Nick could leave, he could go wherever he wanted right now, because I certainly didn't want him.

''What I mean is…you see the thing is Charlie, this is the truth; I don't want to kiss you again and watch you run back to Nick.'' He spelled it out for me, being truthful now. That definitely made sense instead of accusing me of wanting that idiot.

''Well…I wont. If I choose you, that would be it. I mean…cant you see the pattern going on here?'' I asked him, because the fact was that I could see the pattern. He shook his head, confusion taking place of his features.

''Whenever I go back to Nick, I run back to you. I want you, despite the stupid choices that my brain makes. If I choose you, there would be no more Nick.'' I spelled it out for him because it was true.

He didn't smile like I expected him to though, and I watched him carefully as he finally took that news in. ''Nick, wanted to speak to you downstairs.'' He spelled it out for me. I nodded, and walked downstairs, expecting Ro to follow me.

I walked into the kitchen, with Rob behind me, watching confused. Nick was in the kitchen, hope flickering in his eyes as soon as he had seen me. I rolled my eyes in response, hoping that he would understand that I was still furious with him.

''I'm not dumping you.'' I told him, as Rob walked out to the door, listening still from outside. ''I want you to give me the space that _I want_. And if you don't, there really will be no _us_.'' I spelled it out for him.

He nodded, listening carefully as I told him what I wanted for once, and not for what he presumed that I wanted for once. He smiled at me in reassurance to carry on, making me shake my head. Sucking up wasn't going to do the trick.

''And you were really out of order tonight, you know that.''

''I know.'' He agreed automatically.

''I'm still really angry with you, because of how you told everyone tonight despite how you knew that I didn't want to. And that's because I need to have some time to think about this move to London, properly.'' I spelled it out for him.

He nodded, understanding what I was saying. ''Okay, I understand; I really do.'' He promised me sweetly.

I nodded, knowing that there was one more thing that I needed to talk to Nick about. And that was Rob.

''And as for Rob…'' I trailed off, watching Rob's head dart round the door further to try and hear what we were saying. Good, because this was the truth and I wanted both Nick and Rob to hear, if I was honest.

''You're right.'' I finally agreed with Nick. ''There is something more with me and Rob, but…I haven't acted on it…I've tried not to anyway.'' Because that was kinda the truth. I had been trying to be good.

''I do love you Nick.'' I admitted, because it was true. Nick smiled in response, trying to take my hand in his, but I didn't let him. I needed to say this without him trying to mollycoddle me or whatever.

''But the thing is…I love Rob too. I'm in love with Rob too.'' I admitted, because it was true. Nick's hand dropped instantly, his eyes and mouth widening in shock. But there was no point lying anymore.

''I'm sorry, but…it's the way I feel. I don't know how I can be in love with two people, but…well, I am.'' I admitted truthfully. ''I'm sorry, but…this is the way that I feel.'' I told him truthfully, because this was me…being truthful.

''Okay.'' He agreed simply, walking out of the kitchen and heading out of the front door. I sighed in response, knowing that I might have actually ruined us. But, although I hated to say it…I didn't feel very…sorry for what I had done.

Because I wasn't lying or saying what I thought that somebody else might hear. I had been truthful, telling him how I felt; he needed to hear that, because although I hurt him…I was only hurting him more by carrying on lying.

It was about time that I started telling the truth and admitting how _I_ really felt, instead of being concerned about what everyone else might feel, because I would only be hurting Nick more in the long run.

I watched as Rob walked back into the kitchen now, knowing that he had heard absolutely everything that I had just admitted to Nick. It didn't matter to me; I had wanted Rob to know everything.

I had wanted him to know how I really felt, because everything that I had just admitted to, was true. I was in love with him, and that may still have been like how I loved him when I first met him; obsessively-so, but I didn't care.

He walked up to me slowly, silently, and stopped right in front of me. I watched him for any sign of discomfort but I found none, like how I knew that I wouldn't do. He was happy about what I had admitted.

He startled me then; pushing me back into the counter and taking my face between his hands, forcing me to look at nothing but him. I watched him, knowing what he wanted, knowing what he was thinking.

''Rob…we cant.'' I warned him, because although I wanted him to kiss me, it was probably not right on Nick himself. He pushed himself forward though, slowly starting to lower his face to mine, and I knew that I had to stop him.

''Rob…we shouldn't…we need to stop-''

I was cut off by his lips pressing against mine, and as soon as he had kissed me; my control was out of the window. I wanted him closer, and now.

My hands run down his body gently, feeling waves of pleasure emulate from him, and stopped at his lower back, pressing his body closer to mine as he lifted me onto the counter behind me. I wrapped my legs around him, and pressed my hands back into the back of his hair.

I moaned in response-unable to stop myself-after feeling his tongue gently prod my closed lips. I gave him entrance straight away, pressing my hands deeper into his hair and wrapping my hands into the strands of his glorious hair.

He moved his lips away from mine, leaving me whimper in response after our kiss had gotten so intense, and left a trail of kisses to my throat. I lifted my head up to give him better access, unable to stop myself moaning again.

I was out of control; the way that he kissed me and had control of me felt…absolutely electrifying. The way that he was kissing and sucking on my pulse point felt so good, and wherever he kissed; he left nothing but smoldering fire in place of his wonderful kisses.

''Rob.'' I breathed out, knowing that we had to stop before this got too far. I was out of control; under his spell, thanks to the glorious electricity running through us; his lips on my skin. It felt too good, and for that reason alone we needed to stop.

''You…god…we need to stop.'' I breathed out, forcing me to say the words out loud. He huffed against my skin in response, making me shiver in delight as his warm breathe hit my throat in the most tender of places.

''I'm not stopping.'' He promised me in a glorious, rough voice; which only made me shiver in more delight again. How could I get him to stop, want him to stop; when he was behaving like this?

''Uhnn…we should. You…god…so good, but…this isn't right.'' I warned him under my breathe even though I was pulling him closer and closer to me.

''I'm not stopping.'' He repeated in the same, gloriously rough voice, and that was it; my control was gone, and I wanted more.

I groaned, and brought his lips back to mine, so that I could kiss him exactly how I wanted to; urgent and needy…

***


	44. Embarrasing

His hands slipped from my face and fell on either sides of my body, causing me to shiver delightfully in response. He crept them up to my legs, and let them rake higher after pushing my body closer to his still.

This was getting way out of hand, and I knew that I would have to stop him and now. I mean…this couldn't keep going, not with the way things that were heading. My dress being pushed up my legs, his hands trailing higher and higher on my legs…

I mean…I had definitely not been _this _close to anybody before, not like this. My legs were still wrapped tightly around his body, his hands still daring me to stop him from trailing his hands higher up.

His hand was now already well past my knees. I had to stop him and I had to stop him now; especially with my self confidence the way it was. I couldn't exactly let this carry on anymore. It was getting out of hand.

''Stop, stop.'' I gasped out in between gulps of breathe as Rob's face slipped down to the middle of my neck, giving me time to catch my breathe. This wasn't right…not whilst I was still with Nick especially.

''Why?'' Rob asked; sounding just as breathless as me. His breathe gently fanned over my neck, and sent shivers of pleasure right through my body in response. And I couldn't stop myself pull my head back and give him more sweet access to my neck.

''Because…this isn't right…not when we're like this. I-I'm still with…god…Nick.'' I spelled it out for him, trying not to let my body win over my mind. I wouldn't let my body give into Rob, even if it was just too tempting.

''Hmm…you're right, but…cant.'' He gasped out, before returning his lips to mine again. I wrapped my legs tighter around his waist, and pressing him closer to me. As if I could have ever resisted this.

I moaned as he deepened the kiss again, and my hands pressed into the back of his hair again, and pressing his face closer to mine, as close as I possibly could as our tongues danced together in a perfectly.

He tasted so sweet; like everything indescribable and so sweet too. He tasted like candy, mixed with glorious mints, and a small hint of alcohol and cigarettes, which I absolutely loved. I couldn't seem to say no.

''We…need…to…stop.'' I gasped in between kisses. I didn't want to stop, but we needed to stop. I didn't want to stop, but we definitely needed to stop now, before it got too far ahead. This was already getting out of hand.

''Fine.'' He agreed, but pressed his body deeper to his by the small of my back, making me moan in delight and kissed me urgently one last time, as he started to pull away from me like how we should be doing…

He smiled at me sheepishly as soon as we had pulled away from each other. It was funny how when we weren't kissing or close together, our shyness and the reality of what exactly we had been doing and how far it had gone came back to us.

I often found that this happened a lot with Rob. I mean…I couldn't say no to him, and lets face it; who exactly could say _no_ to him? And the way that his eyes were still lit up in excitement, the way that he was gazing at me…god, it made me shudder.

''Shall we go back into the living room…before we get carried away again?'' I asked him; trying to sound as gentle as I could, because although I wanted to carry on, it wasn't right at all in carrying this on.

''I think that's a good idea considering how I cant control myself around you.'' He agreed, lacing his right hand with my own. I giggled into my hands in response, feeling very embarrassed and flustered as I followed him out of the kitchen, and into the hallway.

I gasped in shock at the sight in front of us, but that wasn't nearly loud enough over the loud music entering the hallway from the living room, to make them stop. They didn't even hear the gasp of shock.

Tasha jumped on Kellan…well okay, she didn't exactly jump, but it looked like it from here, and I could only watch in shock as Tasha kissed Kellan with as much enthusiasm as how I was kissing Rob on that kitchen side…and Kellan was definitely enjoying it by the looks of it; as he pulled her face more securely to his.

I wasn't really too sure on what to do for the best. I mean…we was just standing here, and they couldn't hear us, and we were still watching in shock as…yep, this was definitely going way over-board; especially as Tasha had definitely just undone Kellan's trouser belt.

I gasped in shock, but because they still hadn't heard that; Rob cleared his throat loud enough for them to hear him. Tasha jumped away from Kellan in shock and flushed bright red as soon as she had caught sight of us.

''Sorry Tasha…we were just going in the living room.'' I spelled it out for her. I looked back to see Rob; blushing red as much as Tasha was doing. I grinned in response, and pulled him into the living room with me, by his hand.

''Ur…okay. I'll just go and get some more…drinks.'' Tasha stuttered; sounding all flustered, making me laugh in response.

''Uh huh.'' I agreed with her disbelievingly; making her laugh in embarrassment. Bless her, but she would only do the same to me if I was in her shoes, so it was kinda like…revenge. Ha ha, I liked that idea.

''Go and get some more drinks them, Tasha.'' I joked with her, walking back into the kitchen to see her doing just that. She just nodded in response, not yet able to meet my eyes yet. ''More like condoms.'' I joked, mumbling to her so that nobody else could hear.

She gasped in shock, and almost dropped the four bottle of WKD that she was holding. My hand stopped them, and picked them up for her. She flushed another kind of bright red, and looked away from me quickly, after thanking me.

''That's okay…you do have butter fingers sometimes, don't you Tasha?'' I joked with her, liking the fact that I could embarrass her with this. It was usually me facing the embarrassment, so it made a nice change.

''Very funny, Charlie…what were you and Rob doing in the kitchen again? It was silent out here for a few minutes.'' She added, whilst Kellan watched at the kitchen door. I stopped dead in my tracks, and went bright red.

I could tell that I had gone bright red because both Kellan and Tasha laughed in response. I flushed a darker red in response, making Tasha laugh even more. God, I should have known that it wouldn't take long for the embarrassment to hit back to me again.

''Was the kitchen side getting used then Charlie…like in Party time?'' Tasha joked, making me look away and bite my lower lip in response, trying to ignore the questions. Because the thing was…she was right.

''Urm…no…we were er…listening to music.'' I lied, still looking away from her as I chewed self consciously on my lower lip; feeling as though I was going to faint from all of this blushing. I hoped to god that I wouldn't.

Tasha huffed at me in response. ''Yeah, sounded like it.'' She agreed sarcastically, making Kellan laugh in response. Oh god, surely I wasn't that loud; especially over the blazing music in the living room!

''It sounded like pretty loud music.'' Tasha commented; raising her eyebrows at me in response. I kept my face away from hers, knowing that I was flushing bright red, and at any minute now, I was going to faint if I didn't breathe.

''Why were you even listening anyway?'' I asked her curiously, hoping that it didn't sound too obvious. By the look on Tasha's face though; it was obvious that I had just clearly put my foot in it big time.

''We couldn't help it, with all that moaning going on.'' Tasha replied, huffing. I choked on my bottle of WKD in response as Kellan howled with laughter in response. I flushed even more brighter red, making Tasha laugh at me too.

''I'm er…just going to…go and sit in the living room. Keep er…Rob company.'' I admitted embarrassed, trying not to look at Tasha too much, walking past her quickly as I blushed furiously.

''Uh huh…I bet. Well if we hear any moaning going on, we'll know what's happening.'' Tasha replied, and I instantly put my head down as I walked past Kellan, as he howled with laughter again in response. As if I'd do that in front of Rachael and Jackson!

I groaned in embarrassment in response and walked into the living room where just Rob was now. I looked around the room confused, wondering where Rachael and Jackson had gone after they were here a moment ago.

''Where's Rachael and Jackson gone?'' I asked him confused, walking over to the sofa where he was sat, and handing him a beer that I had got from the kitchen from him. He smiled shyly in response and ran his hand through the top of his hair.

''Bedroom.'' He admitted, spelling it out for me. I flushed bright red in response, wondering why I had even asked him actually. It was a likely reply when it came down to Rachael and Jackson. But I didn't blame her.

''Ah…of course.'' I replied, still embarrassed about it. ''And er…Kirsty and Phil?'' I asked him, doubting that they had ran off to her bedroom. I mean…it just so didn't seem like something that Kirsty would do.

''Erm…they went to Phil's…I think.'' He admitted, sounding somewhat tipsy now as he drank his bottle of beer. I laughed in response, finding him impossibly cute as he struggled to think about that one.

''Never mind…we're all alone.'' I reminded him, kissing him once on the cheek. He turned his head automatically, grinning at me in response.

''Uh huh…so it seems.'' He replied, sounding very happy about that fact as he began to lean closer to me.

''Urm…there's still Tasha and Kellan.'' I reminded him, only to get a shrug off of him in response. He pressed forward until he was lingering over me, and took away and put down both of our drinks.

''They're in the kitchen.'' He reminded me smartly, before pressing his lips down to meet mine. I gave in instantly, pressing my hands into the back of his hair and kissing him back with the same eagerness as how he was kissing me.

''What did I tell you?'' I heard Kellan say smugly at the door. Rob groaned in response, and pressed the door shut so that he couldn't see anymore, before his lips found mine again; eager and urgent against my own.

***


	45. Happy Ever After?

My choice in choosing Rob over Nick was definitely the best thing for me to do, as far as I was concerned. It was a couple of days after I had asked Nick to give me space when I saw Nick again, and called it off with him officially.

Rob and I were choosing to take our relationship slow, especially because Rob knew just how much I hated the fact that with our new relationship, it was likely that I was going to have to face the press; something that I didn't want to do for a long, long while.

It was more of Rob's choice to take this relationship so slowly, because he knew just how upset I would be if the paparazzi had an inkling about us being together. I knew all too well about what Rob had to put up with the paparazzi, and I definitely didn't want to face it yet myself.

And me and Nick had finished our relationship on a dignified level, which was nice. Nick knew all too well about why I wanted to end our relationship; because of how I wanted to be with Rob, but he was anything but spiteful about it.

He wished us luck as a couple, and we agreed to be friends, which was good, because although I was still in love with Nick, and cared for him deeply as a person; it didn't match up to anything about how I felt for Rob in comparison.

And I didn't see any point of love without the…well, without the chemistry, without that spark that me and Rob had. I had already got an idea of the difference between just love, and what me and Rob had; and I knew what I wanted most, every single time.

Everyone was delighted with my choice, but agreed to keep quiet, because we really were taking it as slow as we possibly could. We were dating, but for the minute; it was almost like having friends with benefits.

Because, Rob knew that I wanted to take any chance of _us_ slow, after I had only just finished with Nick, and because of that understanding; it only brought us closer together which meant a lot to me.

And just a few days into our agreement, we had agreed to go out to a club with everyone. Rob wanted to come to the house and see me first, so we had agreed to staying at the house for a bit and starting the party there, but getting separate taxi's from the Guys, as to not cause any suspicion of some sort.

Because the fact was, we really were taking no chances, because me and Rob both wanted us to work out, and it meant a lot to both of us that we were taking it so slow…but not expecting too much from each other either.

However, I didn't expect Rob to be round the house so early that afternoon; before I had even started to get ready to go out. He had arrived at the house, not ready himself either at five that evening.

I opened the door to see him standing there in a grey hoodie, which was placed over his head, and light blue, loose jeans, with dark-rimmed glasses for when he was in disguise. He wasn't at all ready to go out, but I couldn't deny how happy I was to see him here.

''Hiya.'' He grinned lopsidedly at me, taking his sunglasses off now that he was safely in the porch. That was better; now that I could see his beautiful…stunning actually, green-grey eyes that I liked so much about him.

''Hey you.'' I replied in shock. I smiled back at him, standing on my tip-toes and peering around him to make sure that I couldn't see anybody standing around or anything, or anyone lurking, before looking back to him; as it was all clear.

''What are you doing here so early?'' I asked him confused, accepting him in leaning down to kiss me. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and kissing him back softly, gently; letting the kiss build itself up, and showing how much I was glad to see him…

''Hmm,'' he murmured as he forced himself to pull away. I laughed in response, mostly because this whole idea of going as slow as were being was mostly his idea, and it wasn't my fault if he was complaining about him pulling away when he did.

''Not my fault; although I do prefer the speed that our relationship is going.'' I admitted honestly, shrugging because it was true. We hadn't really gone on a date so far though, not properly anyway.

We had gone clubbing together, with our friends, but…well, I would have liked it if we got time on our own soon, so that we _could_ go on a date together and enjoy each other's company properly. That would be a great idea, but then…I wasn't too sure if that was going to be possible with the paparazzi all around Los Angeles.

''I know, I know.'' He sighed heavily in response. I laughed again, keeping my arms around his neck, loosely. ''But I like it this way, don't you? No attachments, no strings…its almost like friends with benefits.'' He added, kissing me once on my cheek.

I smiled in response because that last thought had been exactly what I had called it a moment ago; friends with benefits. Not that I minded Rob's casual attitude to our relationship one single bit. In some ways, I think I definitely preferred it.

My first Boyfriend had been a dickhead who thought that getting married was going to be the answer to all our problems…at seventeen. And Nick…well, he had been a different person compared to what I was used to.

He was beautiful, really smart, and he was definitely someone who I liked a lot, someone who I had been falling in love with. But as for Rob…he meant a lot to me, and we both knew where we stood with each other, which was good.

Because Rob knew that I still loved Nick, but he also knew that it didn't compare to how I felt for him. I was also in love with Rob, and my love for Rob definitely overruled everything else that I felt.

''Hmm, I definitely like the way things are going.'' I admitted, because it was true. I pulled his face back to mine securely and his eager lips found mine again. I kissed him back, enjoying that sizzling chemistry explode between us as soon our lips found each others again.

His lips were always pleasantly warm against my own, and whenever we did kiss; that chemistry that sizzled between us always exploded into a amazing warm, smoldering fire. It was enough to churn gut-wrenching need right in the pit of my stomach.

''Me too.'' He admitted, eventually forcing himself to pull away as soon as our kiss started to get urgent. I smiled at him in response, suddenly realizing that I hadn't actually found out while he had visited so early before our kiss.

''So…you still haven't told me why you came round so early.'' I reminded him, wondering how he had gotten out of the question so easily. Ah yes, that's why; because as soon as he had pressed his lips to mine, there was every chance that I would forget everything that I had asked a moment before.

He chuckled quietly under his breathe, and nodded his head once in response. ''Well, I've…kinda got a surprise for you.'' He admitted sheepishly. I watched him confused, trying to work out what it was.

Especially as he was admitting it so sheepishly to me, as if…embarrassed almost, a little bit. ''Wow…well er…where's my surprise then?'' I asked him confused. He hadn't arrived with any plastic bags or whatever.

Unless, his surprise was more, gorgeous jewelry of course; like the beautiful necklace that he had brought us both. The necklace that I never took off, which was a heart pendant, and he had the other half too and wore it constantly, like me.

''Why don't you take me into the house with you, and we go upstairs while you check your wardrobe out…and see if you have a surprise waiting for you.'' He spelled it out for me, making me shocked.

''No way?'' I checked with him, gasping in shock. He nodded, grinning at me in response to seeing me happy.

''I don't even know how I missed that, I was in my bedroom for all of today besides when I was in the bathroom this morning!'' I exclaimed in shock, leading him through to the hallway by my hand.

He laughed in response, happy that I was so thrilled and shocked about my surprise given by him. ''Well…I brought it yesterday as a surprise for you, and I got Rachael to sneak it into your room whilst you were in the bathroom this morning.'' He admitted, making me laugh in response. Not that I should have been surprised about that.

The behavior was typical of Rob; kind and thoughtful. I mean we were only just starting this relationship and he was already buying me things, but I did hope that he didn't make a habit out of it, because I definitely didn't want him to think that I expected presents from him now that we were together.

''Well thank you…this really means a lot to me, you know.'' I told him, because it did. ''I really didn't expect this either.'' I added, because that was also true. I didn't expect him to buy me gifts or whatever.

''Well expect it, because I'm going to carry on buying gifts for you; anything that you want.'' He promised me, making me grin in response. Not that I was actually going to let him get me lots of gifts.

We walked into my bedroom and opened my wardrobe hastily in my rush to find my present, and it was there; stood lonely on its own in the middle of the wardrobe with its fiery red material making the rest of my dresses looking somewhat plain.

It was absolutely gorgeous, and I got it out of the wardrobe, holding the dress carefully by the hanger. It was made of luxurious, red satin which looked absolutely stunning. It was held up by small straps too.

The dress was looked about right with how I had my dress lengths but the pure beauty of the dress made all my usually-gorgeous dresses shine down, because this dress was just so stunning compared to all the rest.

''I absolutely love it, no joke. It's such a stunning dress. I really have fallen in love with it.'' I admitted, in shock. It was so stunning, and I was so grateful for Rob to buy me this dress. It was a shock, but a nice shock.

''I'm glad you like it.'' Rob replied happily, chuckling in relief.

''I don't like it, Rob. I absolutely love it, thank you so much.'' I admitted, because it was true. I put the dress back into the wardrobe carefully, hearing him laugh again in response to my enthusiasm.

I turned around and found Rob sat on the edge of my bed, smiling at me happily. I grinned back, playfully. ''Would you like me to show you…how much I like my new dress?'' I asked him as playfully as I could.

I walked over to him as gracefully as I could, enjoying the fact that his eyes had suddenly widened in shock, in response to my playful question. I sat on his lap and wrapped my arms gently around his neck, and hearing him gulp in response to that.

I pursed my lips and forced myself not to laugh at the reactions that I seemed to be having on him, especially as I could feel his heart just besides my arm, and…it was definitely speeding up in response the closeness of me now.

It was good to see my own reactions towards him was reflected with him.

''Are you er…having troubles with your heart there, love?'' I asked him as playfully as I knew how. I lowered my head and giggled uncontrollably into his chest seconds though, because I couldn't help it.

''No…ticking healthily.'' He promised me, making me smile against his chest.

''That's good to know.'' I replied, kissing my trail of kisses from his neck. He sighed happily in response, and my lips found his then, cutting off his sigh quickly. He kissed me back happily, wrapping his hands gently into the back of my hair.

It started simple, gentle; small caresses of our lips ghosting on top of each others, but the more that the kiss got along; the more urgent that it turned. It began to build into more; that smoldering fire turning more and more intense as this kiss went on.

Eventually though, he pulled away from me, making me sigh now. He chuckled in response. ''Well…it's ten past five, and…I'd much rather see you _in _that dress, rather than see it hanging in the wardrobe.'' He admitted, making me blush in response.

He was right though, it was probably time for me to start getting ready. ''Well, you better go then. I want to surprise you with this dress tonight.'' I told him, chucking him out of my room, and making him laugh in response.

''See you tonight then.'' He agreed, kissing me once more.

''You will.'' I agreed with him, shutting the bedroom door behind him so that I could go and get showered.

***

**And if you want to have a look at the dress that Rob brought Charlie, click the a url please; I think that its gorgeous dress. **

?catalog%5Fname=FOREVER21&category%5Fname=dress%5Fdressy&product%5Fid=2060263134&Page=1


	46. Booth

I checked that I looked alright in my mirror, making sure my hair; which was both curled and straight, looked okay too. Rachael had styled my hair tonight, because we were back on speaking terms with each other, thanks to my new relationship with Rob.

''You look so pretty hon, honestly.'' Rachael admitted, as she watched me make sure in the mirror. It wasn't that I didn't trust Rachael's makeover and styling, it was just that…well, I wasn't used to having my hair curled, even if it was just a few strands.

''Thank you…especially for styling it, it looks amazing.'' I added, watching her as she put her make-up away back into her bag in the mirror. ''I've never really had my hair curled before, not like this, but…I really like it.'' I promised her.

''Good, well…as-long as Rob likes it, that's the main thing.'' She promised me, making me giggle in response. It felt too strange saying it like that, and as usual; it made me blush like crazy as soon as she had said it.

''Well er…thanks Rachael.'' I replied again, looking back to the mirror to make sure that my curls were in the right place again, before walking to the bedroom door, to go downstairs and check where everyone else was.

''I'm sorry.'' Rachael's voice instantly made me stop at the doorway. She carried on, now that she had my attention. ''For being a bitch, I'm sorry.'' She added, spelling it out for me, about why she was apologizing.

I sighed, and shook my head. ''That's okay.'' I promised her, because it was. I didn't like it when Rachael was sad about the way she was; I knew what she was like, but I didn't care. She was my best friend and I forgave her for her flaws and goods, just like how she did with me.

''We both said things that we regretted.'' I promised her, because it was true. I mean, it was hardly mature of me to tell Rob to stop talking to me at all. It would have been more mature to talk about things, instead of refusing.

''No, we didn't; that's just the thing.'' Rachael huffed in response. ''I didn't need to get involved, it was between you, Rob and Nick.'' She added. I supposed that was true, but…well, I was used to Rachael by now.

''It's okay chick…you did me a favor.'' I turned back round to see her sat on the edge of my bed, looking a little sad now. I sighed, and walked over to her; putting my arms around her as I did. ''Rach, honestly.'' I huffed.

''I know what you're like, and I accept that. I wouldn't have you changed in any other way.'' I promised her, because it was true. She was cool, drank and smoked a lot, but…like Tasha and Kirsty, she was my best friends; _good friends_.

''Well…someone has to have me.'' She huffed, accepting my arms welcomingly. I laughed in response, even though I had tried not to.

''Well clearly you're not that bad Rach.'' I joked. ''You're with Jackson too. He clearly thinks the world of you.'' I added, because it was true.

''You're right.'' She agreed. ''I picked a good choice in Jackson.'' She added, agreeing with me. I laughed and nodded.

''You sure did.'' I promised her. ''Now, are you coming with me to get this taxi then?'' I asked her, pulling away then.

She nodded, and followed me out of my room. We walked downstairs, and then I forgot to tell her that she looked really pretty. Because she really did look pretty too; with a sea green party dress on, and high heels to match.

''You look really pretty by the way.'' I told her as we walked into the hallway.

''Thanks, so do you. Of course I had to help Rob choose the dress. The first one that he picked up was disgusting.'' She admitted, rolling her eyes in response. ''Boys, eh? As if they could ever run a fashion line.'' Rachael added, huffing.

I laughed in response, following her into the kitchen, where Kirsty, Phil, Tasha and Kellan sat on the high chairs. I followed Rachael over to the table, noticing automatically that everyone was already drinking.

I rolled my eyes in response to that fact, especially as Tasha looked…kinda drunk. She grinned at Kellan, who grinned back at her, watching her giggle in response, and drink from her lambrini bottle.

''Well…would you like a bottle of WKD then, Charlie?'' Rachael ask me, after she had got herself her own drink already.

''Urm…yes please. But I'm not getting drunk tonight.'' I added, making her laugh in response. She obviously didn't believe me, but I didn't want to get drunk tonight; I wanted to make the most of my time with everyone.

I would get tipsy yeah, but….not drunk.

''Well,'' Rachael shrugged in response. ''We'll see.'' She added, making me laugh in response. She still sounded like she didn't believe me.

''We will.'' I agreed, before downing the bottle of WKD. I stopped, looking about for Jackson and Rob then. ''Where's Jackson and…where's Rob?'' I asked them confused, and a little anxiously too.

I had wanted to see Rob, before we went to the club, but as I looked around the kitchen and out to the garden…it didn't look as though he was here.

''Oh, er…Jackson went to get a taxi with Rob…they didn't want the paparazzi getting hint that Rob visits here as often as he does.'' Tasha admitted, sounding like she was hiding something or other to me.

I looked back to her suspiciously, but she quickly looked away, pursing her lips as she did; making me confused. I looked away again, wondering what she was up to exactly, but still letting it be.

We got a bigger taxi for all of us, and we went to a club around the corner. It was probably the best club in Los Angeles, and one that we had never been to…until now. I was a little confused though, because we were supposed to be going to the same club that we went to the other night…which told me something was going on.

I didn't say anything, and I walked into the club; taking in all of the features around here. It looked amazing, with a huge dance floor with all crowded bodies together as they danced to the heavy club beat.

There was a DJ on stage, at the left side of the room, and I noticed that all of the tables; had small, square candles on them which looked really pretty against the darkness of the room, and sparkling, club lights.

My head darted over the many bodies on the dance floor and peered around the room as I tried to look for Rob. I couldn't see him anywhere though, not even when I scanned the dance floor a million times.

''Where's Rob then?'' I asked Tasha.

She rolled her eyes and pointed over to some stairs. ''If you follow them stairs, I'm petty sure you'll find him.'' She admitted, honestly.

''Ur…okay.'' I agreed nervously, walking past everyone carefully in the middle of the room, and walked up the stairs, wondering what was going on. I mean…why hadn't he met there, at the club; like everyone else.

I got even more nervous as I reached the top of the floor because as I walked down the small whole hallway, I noticed that they were all private booths; and not just booths, but…beds _in_ the booths too.

Some of the red satin curtains were already shut, in use, and then some were opened; not being used at all, with nobody in them. Why did Rob want to meet me here exactly? It made me panic, just to ask myself.

I walked to the very last booth and peeked behind the curtain, which was pulled back. Rob was sat on the edge of the darkened, grey bed, looking somewhat stressed about something or other as he ran his left hand through the top of his messy hair.

I watched him confused, still not sure why we were actually in a club booth, with…er…beds. I mean…it wasn't like…he had planned what someone like Rachael would have thought he planned it for, but…it definitely got me confused.

Around the bed, was candles on the small, glass sides around the small booth, which was hidden in a light, pink frame, making the small booth turn a tinted, intimate, red color. To match my rising blush, it seemed.

To make it look even worse; there was a bottle of champagne in a bucket of ice besides the bed, making me feel even more panicked. It didn't help with the fact that I felt like I was going to hyperventilate at any second.

With every breathe that I took, my chest felt tighter; as though I couldn't breathe properly. Of course, I was breathing alright, but with each look at this private, intimate room; it made me panic more and more.

I forced myself to take a deep breathe and walked into the booth, making Rob's head dart up in shock. He smiled sheepishly at me, and ran his hand through the top of his hair again as he walked over to me.

''You look…absolutely beautiful.'' He admitted, seeming to struggle for words. I smiled in response.

''So do you.'' I replied, because it was true. He was wearing a buttoned down, white shirt, with quite a few buttons undone, and a smart, black suit with trousers, and polished shoes to match. He always looked nice, when he wore suits.

''Er…thanks.'' He replied, awkwardly. He took another look around the room, after catching me glancing. ''They're the only private booths in this club. I er…well…I thought that maybe you'd go on that date with me…here.'' He admitted.

I nodded, feeling somewhat relief with that fact. I looked around the small room again, unsure of where to begin or what we should be doing on a first date. I had been on dates with Nick, but it was a hell of a lot more awkward with Rob.

Especially as we were together in such a small, intimate environment and the chemistry was…well, to me anyway…it felt as though it was sizzling in this small room right now, between us.

''Well er…do you want to take a seat?'' He asked me unsure. I smiled, and shook my head, because I wanted to do another thing first, before we took a seat in here.

''Not yet.'' I replied quietly, stepping forward and gently wrapping my hands around his neck. ''I wanted to do this first.'' I spelled it out for him, before gently pressing my lips down to meet his own.

I kissed him with the same softness as this evening in my bedroom, pressing my hands into the back of his glorious hair as our kiss carried on and steadily got more and more urgent as the time passed.

I let this kiss lead on; enjoying the way that my lips felt like they were burning in response to his warm lips moving on mine in sync; the smoldering fire blazing underneath the surface of this intense kiss.

Eventually, he pulled away after letting this kiss build on for so long. He smiled sheepishly at me, seeming quite pleased with himself after that. I blushed red in response, because the truth was; I was too.

I followed him over and sat on the edge of the bed, not really sure what to do now after that intense kiss.

***

Our first date had definitely gone well, and by the end of the night; we went home with everyone else in a bigger taxi. Everyone else was carrying on the party, but I didn't want to; especially as we had drank the whole of the champagne bottle in that booth.

''I think I should go to bed early Guys…I'm feeling a little tired.'' I admitted, because it was true. I did feel a bit tired.

Tasha nodded in response, raising her eyebrows at me suspiciously. ''Uh hum, and is Rob going with you?'' She asked me, making me blush bright red in response. She laughed, and I quickly looked away again.

''Ur…no.'' I replied, making her snicker in response. I looked back at Rob to see him looking just as embarrassed as I was.

''Well we're getting into the pool outside, so you're loss.'' Rachael joked, meaning the new spa pool that Tasha had brought.

I huffed in response. ''Not exactly; I have a spa pool in my bedroom.'' I told her, making her laugh in response.

Rob followed me upstairs after I suggested the idea to him, though…I had to admit when I thought about the pool…it kinda made me nervous now. Rob left to go and get changed in the spare room, and I went into my bathroom, getting changed in the toilet.

I put a red swimming costume on, making sure it didn't show too much flesh off, and put my dress back on, to go back into the bedroom. The truth was…I hadn't actually been swimming for years, and…well, I very much disliked the idea of small costumes.

Rob was sat on the edge of the pool outside, and as soon as I had looked at him, I couldn't take my eyes away. His chest and legs were bare, gloriously naked besides the swimming shorts that he had on.

His chest was even more glorious than I could have imagined; pale, and muscular. He was definitely toned, with a small, trail of hair running down the middle of his glorious chest. I had a feeling that I was staring too, because Rob was watching me to make sure that this was okay with me. If only he knew.

''Um….this was the only spare change of clothes I had to swim in.'' He admitted, seeming a bit awkward, because of how this moment was.

I nodded in response, forcing myself to look away from his beautiful chest. ''Ur…that's fine. I'm already changed, I just have to…take my dress off.'' I admitted, feeling myself get more and more red as I said it.

I was still partly drunk though, which made it easier to get the awkwardness out of the way. If I was sober, there was no way that I would have been able to go through with this, especially not with him.

''Ur…okay…do you need any help?'' He asked me, before cursing under his breathe for how that sounded. I knew what he meant though. ''I just mean…well, I know there's a zip to undo and I was just wondering if-''

''-Okay.'' I interrupted his nervous ramblings for him. He nodded, looking as though it was mostly for himself, and got off of the side of the bath to help me take my dress off. I turned round and felt him carefully undo the zip at the back of the dress for me.

''Finished.'' He promised me quietly, kissing me gently on the back of my neck, and causing me to shiver in delight in response. I nodded and looked back round at him shyly as I slowly slipped off my dress.

He watched my face the whole time, right until my dress was on the floor and his eyes failed him, and he looked down at my body, before just as quickly looking back to my face. ''You're absolutely beautiful, you know that?'' He told me, stepping closer to me.

His lips found mine urgent and eager, and I didn't care if this wasn't as gentle as how we normally were when we kissed. Because this was definitely so worth it.

***


	47. Shock

We had decided to go out clubbing the next night, but I wasn't going to see Rob all day that day, which kinda made me sad a little bit. He had to go to Vancouver to spend the day filming his new film that he was filming, and although that I understood, I was kinda upset by the idea.

Rachael had gone with them, because her and Jackson didn't mind about the paparazzi finding out about them, where as I was a little bit more…concerned, like how Rob was. He understood my reasons for wanting to keep us secret, especially as he only began our relationship.

But because I was going to be seeing him again tonight, I made sure that I got myself really dressed up for him, because I wanted to look really nice, and catch his attention again after spending the night and day away from him.

I put on a dark blue, satin dress, with a one shoulder strap. It was pretty, if not a little tight around me, but that was how it was meant to be. I put some matching high heels with it and followed everyone downstairs.

Rob was already in the living room, with Jackson and Rachael. I grinned at him, and he smiled back at me shyly. It felt like I was missing something, but I didn't question it as I walked up to him, because I wanted to do something first.

I wrapped my arms around his neck gently, and pressed my lips to his. He kissed me back automatically of course, but pulled away sooner than what he normally would. I smiled at him unsure but he smiled back though.

I left it unsaid, sitting next to him on the sofa, because he seemed okay. ''So…how was your day in Vancouver?'' I asked him casually, as I drunk some of my bottle of WKD. He had been silent for a long while, and I didn't like the silence.

''Okay, filming was a bit slow.'' He admitted sadly.

I nodded. ''Well I'm glad that you're here now.'' I admitted, kissing him on his cheek. He smiled in response, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. I watched him confused, wondering what was up with him.

I left it though, watching Rachael top Rob up with more beer. ''Another one, Rob?'' She asked him, grinning at him in response as she asked.

''Yes please.'' He grinned at her, making me confused. Well in that case…was he just upset with me then?

''Rob,'' I said after he had his got another bottle of beer. He nodded, and watched me to carry on. ''Are you upset with me?'' I asked him confused, because I really couldn't tell if he was upset with me or not.

He shook his head though, his forehead furrowing in confusion as soon as I had asked. ''Of course not, why do you ask?'' He asked me confused.

''Well…you just seemed in a bad mood when you came back, and it seemed to be because of me.'' I admitted before quickly adding; ''I think I'm just being silly.'' I mean…the whole world didn't resolve around me.

''No, you're not. I er…its no excuse, but I really don't think that I'm enjoying filming this film. I'm sorry, just ignore me.'' He asked me, making me smile.

''Okay,'' I agreed quickly. ''But why aren't you enjoying it; I mean…that doesn't sound too good after all.'' I added quickly. He smiled at me, and kissed me on my forehead gently, causing me to blush in response.

''I guess…well, I was kinda missing you which didn't make me feel too great either, and…the other actors are quite intimidating. They've had more experience in the acting field than I have.'' He added.

''Huh, more experience.'' I scoffed at the word. ''Rob, they don't deserve to be there anymore than you. You've worked hard to get where you've gotten to, never forget that.'' I told him, because it was true.

''You're so good to me, you know that.'' He admitted, finally wrapping his arms around me. I sighed happily, leaning my body more into him, so that we were sat as close as I could. I snickered in response.

''More like you're good to me.'' I spelled it out for him, gently wrapping my arms around his glorious, masculine chest. He laughed more easily in response; his body shuddering gently in response to that.

***

I kinda got a bit drunk when I was at the club…okay then, I got absolutely wasted. But…that was only because Rachael was mixing my drinks with vodka; I was sure of it. Because at the club, I only had about four bottles of WKD, and I was absolutely hammered.

I walked off the dance floor, stumbling and almost fell to the floor as I missed the sofa seat. I laughed in response, getting pulled up by Rob. He sighed in response to my drunkenness making me giggle even more.

''Charlie, I really think that you need to chill out with drinking back the alcohol. You cant even stand up straight.'' Rob warned me concernedly, but I was far too drunk to take that seriously. Just my luck.

''Yes, I can. Look.'' I spelled it out for him, getting up and attempting to stand up on my own. It didn't work though; I almost fell over again, making everyone else laugh. Rob sighed in response, helping me up before I could fall flat on my face and back onto the chair again.

''Thanks baby.'' I said drunkenly, gently rubbing my hand on the side of his face. He sighed, and pulled my hand away; looking somewhat embarrassed of my behavior. It was just a shame that I was too drunk to notice that.

''Are you coming to dance Charlie?'' Tasha asked me jokingly, winking at Rob. I laughed though and pulled away from Rob; suddenly in the mood to party and have a dance.

''Hell yes.'' I replied, making Tasha laugh in response. I got up but Rob pulled on my wrist, almost sending me flying again.

He set me down on the sofa and gave me his worried, warning look. ''I don't think that you should dance yet, not in the state that you're in.'' He spelled it out for me anxiously. I rolled my eyes in response.

''I'll be fine.'' I promised him, getting up. I almost fell again though, so Rob walked over to the dance floor with me, and danced with me for as long as I wanted to dance, and for as long as I couldn't stand too.

He wasn't really doing much dancing though and neither was I. I had my arms wrapped tightly around his neck, because he was worried that I would fall flat on my face, and we swayed to the low, club beat.

We danced for a good hour, but I started to sober up then. Rachael was only getting more and more drunk though, and even Rob was a bit tipsy now. He sat back down, leaving me to dance after I was okay.

Bless, I think I kinda wore him out in the end, because as soon as I started to feel less drunk, I started to really dance to the beat, forcing Rob to, too. I danced with Tasha and Kellan, making them both laugh as I really got into it.

I looked back to our table to make sure that Rob was okay, to see him looking a little sad. I grinned in response, and planned to go over there to speak to him, when the impossible happened…

I gasped, watching Rachael grin at him-innocent at first-before starting to lean in, and place an arm loosely around his neck, drunkenly. What the fuck did she think she was doing, leaning in like that?

She whispered something to him, making him laugh in response. _Okay_, I reminded myself; _that was all innocent, they were allowed to joke together, after all; it wasn like Rachael was just going to…_

Oh my god! I watched as she leaned into him, and he turned his head to kiss her. It looked like they were kissing from over here anyway and it definitely wasn't a kiss on the cheek from where I was stood.

I forced myself to walk quickly over there, slamming my heels into the floor furiously as I did. I grabbed hold of Rob's arm furiously, making him look up at me in surprise, and as though he didn't expect this from me!

Well, what the fuck did he expect after I had caught him kissing my 'supposedly' best friend? Congratulations, or something?

''Charlie, what's wrong?'' Rob asked me confused as I forced him to stand up and next to me, with Rachael watching us confused too, with innocent, fucking doe eyes. I was so mad with her now.

''Oh sorry,'' I apologized falsely. ''Shall I just let you carry on snogging my supposed to be friend's face off and head back over there, like I hadn't seen anything then?'' I asked him sarcastically, before looking back to glare at her.

She huffed at me in response. ''Charlie, you better not be accusing me of what I think you're accusing me of, because there will be trouble, if you are.'' Rachael warned me, sounding as furious as me now.

''Well, I am accusing you of kissing my Boyfriend. So what are you going to do about it?'' I demanded angrily. She got up from the sofa, shaking her head in fury at me. I huffed at her in response now.

''And isn't it funny how Jackson missed this too? Talk about fucking suspicious!'' I shouted at her whilst Rob carried on trying to explain in my ear, but I wasn't listening. I'd known what I had seen.

''Go on then, tell me why its fucking suspicious for!'' Rachael shouted at me furiously. she was just as angry as me now.

''How you want to go to Vancouver to supposedly support your Boyfriend, and then two seconds later, you're kissing _my_ Boyfriend who happened to be there in Vancouver with you too.'' I spelled it out for her.

''Oh my fucking god; you cant actually be serious!'' She shouted at me. ''Rob was filming all day, wasn't you Rob?''

''Yeah, I was. Charlie, me and Rachael kissed on the cheek, I swear to god-''

''Don't fucking lie, Rob!'' I shouted at him, pushing him away from me furiously. I wasn't going to let him fucking cheat on me again.

''It's the truth, I swear!'' Rob promised me.

''Oh, I'm sure it fucking is!'' I replied furiously, being sarcastic. ''I saw you two _kissing_, as in lip kissing. There was definitely no cheeks being fucking kissed. So you're both fucking lying!'' I shouted at them.

''Oh _please_, get over yourself!'' Rachael shouted at me, making my head spin back to look at her to hear more lies. ''Like I'd be kissing Rob when I have Jackson. Why the fuck would I want Rob for?'' She asked me, huffing at me.

Jackson, and the rest were at the table now, and as Jackson heard that; he laughed. ''Charlie, you're not actually accusing Rachael of kissing Rob are you?'' He asked me in surprised shock. I nodded, looking back at him seriously. I know exactly what I had seen, and I wasn't fucking blind.

''You wasn't here to see it. She kissed him!'' I promised him, because it was true. I had seen it myself.

''You're a fucking joke, Charlie. Like I'd want Rob; he's my fucking friend, nothing else, you idiot.'' She told me angrily. ''We kissed on the fucking cheek, except for the fact that you were too drunk to see it clearly, _darling_.'' She added, pushing me away from her.

I glared at her, before instantly pushing her back. Who the fuck did she think she was; kissing my Boyfriend, lying to me, and then pushing me away? ''Don't fucking push me!'' She shouted at me, pushing me away again.

''Well then; don't fucking push me!'' I shouted at her, pushing her twice as hard away from me in response. There was no way that I was letting her do this to me, no matter how long we had been friends.

She had known how long I had waited for Rob, and there was no way that I was just going to let her steal him away from me like she was fucking trying to.

''Don't fucking push me again, or you'll fucking regret it!'' She shouted at me furiously, pushing me away from her again. She pushed me harder this time, and I felt myself fall slightly into Rob, from behind me.

''Like fucking hell, I will!'' I shouted at her, trying to reach her so that I could really show her how fucking angry I was! Rob stopped me though, pulling me away by my arm, which was half raised in fury.

''Charlie, for god sake; calm down! Me and Rachael kissed on the cheek, I promise you. There's no need to get into a stupid fight over this! Not with your best friend.'' Rob warned me, trying to be sweet.

I huffed, and grabbed my arm away from him, and glared at her. ''I don't fucking care, because I know for a fact that she kissed you!'' I shouted at her, making her huff in response.

''Keep accusing me, and I swear to god; you'll be the one regretting this, darling.'' She promised me, trying to keep her cool whilst everyone was trying to keep us as separate from each other as possible.

I huffed at her though in response. ''And keep calling me darling Rachael, and I swear to god; I wont be the one happy!'' I promised her, pushing her away from me again furiously. I wasn't going to let her get away with this; no fucking way.

''That's it, you are in so fucking trouble!'' She shouted, pulling Rob out of the way, and slapping me across the face. And yes, she actually slapped me. I gasped in shock, stopping to glare at her instantly in response to the shock of it.

I was so not going to cry, because I was too furious for that. ''Don't fucking slap me, after trying it on with Rob, you hypocrite!'' I shouted at her, flying at her before Rob could stop me. I pushed her more furiously, because I didn't slap, just as Rob managed to pull me away from her.

He grabbed me by the waist, the same time that Kellan pulled Rachael from me from the waist, and carried me away from Rachael. ''Oh my fucking god, you better get off of me now Rob, or I swear to god!'' I shouted at him, hitting his chest angrily with my fists.

He swore under his breathe in response, but refused to let me go from his arms. ''Calm down, will you?'' He begged me, carrying me out of the club, whether the paparazzi were there or not. Luckily, it wasn't too busy outside.

He ignored a group of teenage Girls laughing at us in response, but I didn't. I was furious as it was, without them idiots laughing at me. ''Something funny?'' I shouted, making Rob gasp in shock.

They stopped laughing instantly though. I smirked at them, proud that they had stopped laughing and I had shut them up. ''Charlie shh now, because you are definitely not doing yourself any favors.'' Rob warned me.

I huffed in response. ''Says the Guy that tried it on with my best friend.'' I shouted at him, annoyed.

''She kissed me on the cheek! God knows what you were seeing Charlie.'' He shouted back at me, as he put me into the back of the taxi, and directed them to drive me home. ''You must really think a lot of me Charlie, to think that I would cheat on you, like that!'' Rob added, annoyed with me.

I huffed in response. ''You just proved that you'd do exactly that tonight.'' I warned him, pouting miserably.

''I just said that-''

''-And incase that wasn't clear enough for you.'' I interrupted Rob, pushing him away from the taxi, and shutting the door behind him. He watched me confused. ''That was me dumping you.'' I confirmed angrily before the taxi drove away.

However, as soon as he had; I cried my eyes out because of the reality of what had just happened. I had just dumped Rob, and he had actually cheated on me. There was no way that I could deny that any longer.

And I felt absolutely heartbroken about that fact. I didn't care if Rachael hated me too, because I hated her twice more than she could possibly hate me. Thanks to her kissing Rob, that was. I'd never forgive her for that even if nobody else had believed me.

***


	48. Back To Square One

_I raced into the house, slamming the front door closed behind me in my fury. I raced up the stairs and into my bedroom, knowing full well what I wanted to do and where I wanted to go. I had an idea._

_I mean, I wasn't going to be staying here; living in this house, under the same roof as Rachael after what she had done. I would never forgive her for not only kissing Rob and forcing me to dump him. _

_But for slapping me too and for humiliating me in front of everyone. Okay, so we both swore and a lot of things were said that we didn't mean to say. But she had pushed me first, and she had actually slapped me round the face._

_I slammed my suitcase down onto my bed furiously and took my dress off as I changed into clothes to leave here in. I chose an ultra-casual, mixed-color shirt with buttons on the front of them. _

_The shirt was practically all blue with mixes of patchwork of black and pink, purple and orange. It was elbow long, and I matched it with a pair of knee length, light blue denim shorts, and matched it with blue and white plimsole shoes and grabbed my grey, hooded jacket to take with me for when I arrive in London. _

_I couldn't stand the thought of being anywhere near Rachael or Rob right now, and the sooner that I got to London; as far away from them as possible, the better. I would only do something that I regretted if I saw one of them again. _

_I heard the door slam open though, telling me that they were on their way into the house as I continued to pack my suitcase busily. I was leaving tonight; that was definitely decided with me, as far as I was concerned._

''_She is in so much fucking trouble with me, I'm telling you now!'' I heard Rachael shout furiously as she climbed the stairs. I huffed in response, not at all bothered anymore. If she wanted a fight off of me; she would be getting one a lot more furiously this time. _

''_Rachael!'' I heard the others complain in response to how furious she sounded. I didn't care, I would let her have a go at me, because she would only get it back from me twice as bad as she dished it out now. _

''_Rachael, I want to speak to her first. She dumped me and I want to talk to her.'' I heard Rob say making me huff in response. He could fuck off as-well, because as far as I was concerned; the two of them could have each other. _

''_Well, I know what I've got to say to her. It's short and simple and then its your turn.'' She warned him furiously, running down the hall in her eagerness to get to my room. I didn't care, I was anything bit scared of Rachael right now. _

''_Well…just don't say anything that you'll regret, please Rachael?'' I heard Rob beg. I huffed in response, hearing Rachael huff with me in response. _

''_Oh, don't you worry; I wont be saying anything that I _wont regret.'' Rachael replied. I sighed in response, waiting for her to bound around my bedroom corner and have a go at me. She could do what I liked as far as I cared; both of them could now.

She rushed around the corner of the room, walking into my bedroom, and glaring at me. She looked to me to the case, and her eyes instantly widened in shock as she saw that I was packing. I huffed at her in response, and ignored her; carrying on with my packing silently.

''What are you doing?'' She asked me in shock, even though it was obvious about what I was doing. I was getting out of here and away from them two, before I did something that I was really bound to regret.

''What does it look like?'' I replied sarcastically. ''I'm leaving, are you happy now?'' I asked her sarcastically, still feeling absolutely furious with the both of them as I continued my packing for London.

''Of course I'm not…and you cant just go, not like that!'' She warned me, but she was wrong. I could do what I liked now that there was no me and Rob; so there was no more me and LA as far as I was concerned.

''Well I can, and I will.'' I told her, huffing at her as I put my teddy bear in my suitcase, and the usual things to prepare for a cold September London. I was too furious to think right now, but I would be alright when I got to London.

''Oh yeah, and what about Rob exactly?'' She asked me furiously. ''I mean…have you even thought about him at all?'' She asked me, making me huff furiously at her. I threw my pillow to the floor in temper.

''HOW DARE YOU!'' I shouted at her furiously; my temper through the roof. ''OW DARE YOU COME INTO MY BEDROOM AND JUDGE ME AFTER YOU KISSED HIM!'' I shouted at her angrily.

''Oh get over yourself, you stupid idiot!'' She shouted back, sounding just as angry as me. I huffed in response, before quickly going silent as Rob walked into my bedroom; watching his eyes widen in shock as he took in my packing.

I pursed my lips, turning away and shaking my head furiously because he looked so shocked. What did he expect? That I would live in the same house with Rachael after this? I really don't think so.

''Oh please, you cant exactly keep denying that you didn't kiss Rob-''

''Yes, I can. Because I kissed him on the cheek, you dimwit!'' She shouted furiously at me, making me huff again and shake my head in response. She groaned in response, and shook her head at me.

''You can be fucking think sometimes, Charlie.'' She shouted at me furiously, making me huff again. Was this supposed to be making me _want_ to stay exactly? ''He fucking loves you, you idiot!'' she shouted at me furiously.

''As if he could look, touch or even kiss anyone else when he only has eyes for you!'' She shouted again, confusing me. ''I mean…fucking hell, are you really that blind to see it?'' She asked me in shock, still shouting at me.

I looked round at Rob, but he refused to look at me. He looked down at the floor, looking somewhat embarrassed about being here now. I sighed heavily, not sure on what I should believe now; whether I should go to London or move nearby.

I didn't say stay here, because although I questioned whether she was right or whatever, I still wasn't sure if I could live under the same roof as her right now. And…I had already dumped Rob after all; he wouldn't want me now, after my behavior, and right now; I didn't really want to be living underneath the same roof as Rachael.

''Well…I've made my decision anyway, so.'' I confirmed, because I was stubborn and I still had no other choice now. I couldn't stay in the same house after tonight or I may really do something that I regret.

Rachael huffed in response, sounding angry with me. ''Rob loves you, you idiot. He wants you back, despite the fact that you accused him of fucking cheating on you.'' She huffed at me. ''I don't know why though; if I was him, I would run the other way, right now.'' She added sarcastically.

''But that's because he's madly in love with you, and I'm sorry to say it like this darling, but lets face it; who else is going to accept you for everything you are, flaws and all as well as Rob himself? No-one that's who.'' She confirmed as I refused to look at her.

''I've made my mind up.'' I told her, because I knew that none of that was true. He didn't want me after what I had done tonight. And who could blame him; I mean his face said it all. He was mad with me.

''FUCKING GO THEN!'' Rachael shouted at me, shocking me. ''JUST DON'T COME BACK IF YOU GO BECAUSE I DON'T WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU!'' She added, continuing to shout at me.

I gasped in shock, watching her continue to shout at me as she headed back to the bedroom door. She huffed in response to my expression and shook her head. ''Don't look at me like that, Charlie. You deserved that.'' She told me furiously.

''You don't deserve Rob, and I hope he does fucking let you leave, because I don't want anything more to do with you! And if you really believe that I would kiss your precious Boyfriend, then more fucking fool you.'' She huffed at me.

''I would never cheat with my best friend's Boyfriends thank you, and accusing me of that; I never want you to speak to me ever again. You fucking hear me?'' She shouted before walking out of the bedroom door, and pushing past Rob on her way out.

I watched in shock, before sinking to my bed in shock, and trying hard not to cry. She was right on what she had said, but I still needed to get out of here. I needed time and space away from them for a while to sort my head out, even if Rob could ever forgive me.

''Charlie…Rachael's right.'' Rob told me in a soft, quiet voice. ''It was wrong to accuse her of something like that. I can understand exactly why she's angry.'' He added sympathetically. He was right, of course.

''And right now, I am so mad at you for thinking that I would ever cheat on you, I cant even explain to you.'' He added quietly; sounding as though he himself, was trying to keep his cool now.

''I know, but you cant blame me-''

''-Yes, I can, Charlie.'' Rob interrupted me angrily. I looked up and at him in confusion to see that he looked just as angry as Rachael right now. Of course, I could understand; I would be the same if I got it wrong. _If I got wrong, that was_.

''Look, you know that I've only been Nick and this other Guy before. This Guy had cheated on me when I went out with him, and I haven't trusted anyone enough to go back out with people again-''

''Oh, don't use that excuse!'' Rob exclaimed, shocking me. I watched him as he huffed angrily at me in response. ''You didn't use this excuse with Nick, right?'' He asked me, making sure. I shook my head, quickly looking away from him again.

''No, so why me?'' He asked me in shock. ''I mean; what have I ever done to you to make you think that I would ever cheat on you the moment that your back is turned?'' He demanded; his temper rising more and more by the minute.

''It's just…well, because…'' I breathed our sharply, and forced myself to say it; knowing that he was going to be furious with me as soon as I had said it. ''Its just because you're actually Rob Pattinson, and I still cant believe actually with me, and I just thought-''

''-I don't believe you.'' Rob interrupted me in shock. I looked back up at him in time to see him shake his head in response to how I was talking. How could I possibly blame him when I was acting like this. I couldn't seem to stop myself though, either!

''So, let me get this straight.'' Rob said in shock, trying to get his head around it. ''You think that I would actually cheat on you because of the fact that I'm who I am. That because I'm Rob Pattinson, this image created in the papers…you actually believe it.''

I gasped as soon as he suggested it, because I hadn't meant it like that. I had meant that because of how beautiful he was, how talented he was, and how I had actually wanted him for years; I couldn't believe that it was true.

I didn't mean that I couldn't believe it because of the way that Rob was promoted in the papers; a guy who moved on from one co-star to another; from Kristen Stewart to Emma Simpson. I knew that he wasn't like that.

''No, of course I don't!'' I spelled it out for him, because I really didn't believe that. ''I just cant believe that you're actually mine, that's all. Well…you're not anymore but…look okay, I just meant because I have loved you for years-''

''-You know that I really don't know how you worked that out. You have a funny way of showing that sometimes.'' I had to admit that he was probably right with that sentence. I did have a funny way of showing it.

I went silent and looked down at my feet; not really sure on what I should say to make it up to him, or whatever. I had really changed since coming to LA, and I didn't exactly feel like that shy, little Girl anymore.

I had grown with a lot more confidence ever since I had met Rob, but…what if I had grown in confidence a little too much. What if…well, what if I had turned myself into one of those people that I really couldn't stand? The ones that were up themselves.

''I don't know what to say.'' I admitted honestly.

He huffed at me in response. ''I'll save you the bother of thinking.'' He spat spitefully at me, making me winch in response. But he still carried on.

''I'll be moving to London. Because whether you take that loser back as your Boyfriend, or not; I need space. I need time and space away from you, before I can even stand to be in the same room as you.'' He admitted honestly.

I felt myself struggling not to cry, but I wouldn't in front of him. It wasn't fair on him, not after the way things had ended between us. Even if he did kiss Rachael, though I seriously doubted it now; he had every reason to hate me now.

And I knew for a fact that if he hadn't hated me before, he definitely hated me now. I could see that in the way that I could feel his gaze on me; heavily intense, and not with lust this time…but with pure hate.

''Well…fine, I understand that. But…I need to get away, because if I stay here…'' I trailed off, not finishing because I didn't need to. I may have forgiven Rob, but that was because I was _I _had been in all of the wrong.

Rachael hadn't needed to hit me like she had. I was never actually going to forgive her for that, because there had been no need for that. She was worse than me for her temper and what did she expect me to do when she knew how crazy I was about Rob?

''Do whatever. It's not any of my business anymore, is it?'' I sniped back, making me sigh in response. I didn't want to hear that he felt like that but then what did I expect after tonight, exactly?

''I'm sorry.'' I apologized, knowing that it wasn't any good sitting here and just apologizing. He wouldn't want to know.

''To be quite honest, I'm fed up of hearing you apologize.'' He admitted annoyed, before walking out of my bedroom and leaving me to think about that. I grabbed my suitcase, and went downstairs to go and say goodbye before I went; this was it then.

Rob was already gone, and Rachael was ignoring me . ''I'm sorry about the way that I acted tonight but I don't think I should be staying here after tonight, especially.'' I told everyone because it was true.

''Well…are you coming back?'' Tasha asked me confused.

I forced myself to shake my head, knowing that I wasn't going to be coming back. ''No, not for a while. I think I'll go back to London to go and see my family.'' I admitted, smiling at her. She nodded, looking as sad as I imagined she would.

''I'll be back as soon as I'm ready.'' I promised her, hugging her and Kirsty. Rachael got up from the sofa then, and walked over to me, looking as pissed off as I imagined she would be. I wasn't going to ruin my goodbyes though.

''Well bye then. I still cant believe that you're just going to actually just leave us here.'' She huffed angrily at me in response. I ignored her, and walked out of the door without another word; knowing that anything else that I said, I would only regret.

It was sad that it was going to end like this, but I weren't going to cry about it. Not after the way that Rachael had acted with Rob. I might have been immature for holding such a grudge on her, but even if she didn't kiss him, she looked as though she was going to.

How could I trust her again after that? She knew how much I loved Rob and even if she did kiss him on the cheek, she had still allowed her to get as close as that to him, and she had slapped me round the face.

I walked to Nick's house, planning to move to London with him, and start over there until I was ready to go back to Los Angeles, after clearing my head. But as soon as he had opened the door, I was crying my eyes out over Rob.

''Charlie, what's wrong?''

''It's my fault.'' I admitted sheepishly, looking to the floor in embarrassment. ''Me and Rob are over.'' I admitted, crying more because the fact was; I was heartbroken. I blame myself for me and Rob breaking up and now we were over.

''Hey, come here.'' Nick wrapped his arms around me, but I didn't wrap my arms around him, because the truth was; I wanted Rob and now I had messed everything up for good. And now, I was absolutely heartbroken.

***


	49. Depression

**I watched Nick put the cereal back onto the kitchen side, sighing heavily because I wouldn't eat it. I hadn't been eating properly in the last few days, but then what did he expect? I didn't see the point to anything anymore, not now that I had no friends, and Rob hated me. **

**I was still madly in love with him, and now I would just have to deal with the fact that we were officially over. He didn't want anything to do with me; that much was obvious, and now all I could do was just deal with it. **

''**Charlie, you haven't been eating right for the last five days.'' Nick sighed worriedly. I shrugged, not caring about anything now. Why was I supposed to care when I didn't have the one thing that I wanted?**

**I didn't reply; I never replied. I hadn't talked much in the last five days and I wasn't planning to either. I didn't want to talk when there was nothing to talk about; not when I didn't have Rob with me. **

''**Isn't there anything that I can do for you? Anyone that I can call for you to make you snap out of this?'' Nick asked me in shock, trying to think of anything to snap me out of my poor mood. It wasn't going to work though; Rob didn't want to know me. **

**Nick sighed in response when he got nothing out of me and grabbed hold of my phone lying on the side. ''That's it! I've had enough!'' Nick shouted in fury, searching through my phone for something or other. **

''**I'm ringing Rob to come around here. I'm not having this anymore!'' He shouted furiously at me. I gasped, finally something catching my attention. **

''**Y-You-You cant ring him!'' I spluttered in shock, sitting up for the first time all day to stare at him in shock. There was no point ringing somebody who absolutely hated me, like how Rob did right now. **

''**Ha! Finally; something to catch your attention!'' He shouted at me, before holding the phone to his ear. I got up from the sofa, watching him walk back as I tried to get closer to him and stop him. **

''**You cant possibly ring him!'' I shouted at him in fury. **

**He grinned at me in response. ''It's ringing.'' He warned me, pleased. **

''**No!'' I shouted, trying to grab the phone off of him. He ran outside, and into the pouring rain, but for once; I didn't care that it was raining. I followed him out into the rain, and tried to catch up with him as he began speaking. **

''**Hi, is this Rob? Yeah, well I'm going to need you to come round-''**

''**Nick, stop!'' I begged him, feeling both the rain pour down on my face and the heartbroken tears too. I grabbed the phone off of him and pressed the phone off, while I got the chance to do it; putting him off for a moment. **

''**Charlie…you have to snap out of this!'' Nick shouted at me furiously, grabbing hold of both of my arms and shaking me furiously. **

''**I cant…I just cant!'' I sobbed, crying heavily as the rain fell down my face, and wet my clothes. He sighed heavily in response, and pulled me to him, whilst I cried on his right shoulder; knowing that Rob would never have came round anyway. **

*******


	50. Forgive and Forget?

Things went back to normal that day as we packed to go to London. I stayed on the sofa whilst I watched Nick rush around the house, getting everything packed, and hoping that I was going to snap out of this sooner or later.

He had no chance.

I went to sleep after much crying, but I woke up; feeling somebody shoving me gently against my arm. I groaned, feeling tired, and stirred; trying to get them to stop but they wouldn't. I groaned again, sighing.

I forced myself to open my eyes and I gasped at the sight there. I screamed in shock, before forcing myself to stop and look away quickly. It must have just been my imagination; this couldn't be real.

I must have been seeing things, because I was going that fucking, stir crazy. He wasn't just going to come round here after everything that I had done, I knew that. I wrapped my arms around my knees, and whispered to myself in comfort.

''Rob's not here, he wouldn't come and see you. He _hates_ you, he's always going to hate you.'' I told myself, because I believed that it was true. I wrapped my hands over my ears and squeezed my eyes shut tight, because I could still hear the lies of the craziness of my mind.

''Its just your imagination, its just your imagination, its just your imagination.'' I repeated to myself, because I knew that it was true. A warm hand touched to my face, trying to snap me out of it.

I recognized that hand as the same way that it felt when Rob touched my skin; the same burning sensation, the same way his warm hand touched my skin. My god…I really was losing my mind here.

''Charlie, snap out of this! I'm here.'' Hands pulled away from my hands from my ear, making me sob in response.

''Noooo, I cant take this! Not when I'm going to wake up and know that he's not here.'' I sobbed, feeling myself get pulled to somebody's chest.

''Open your eyes and look at me!'' The furious voice asked. I didn't understand how he sounded so like Rob. I forced myself to do it-opening one eye at a time-and found the voice to match Rob's voice.

''No…no, it cant be you-''

''-Its me.'' He interrupted me, pushing me gently to his chest. As soon as I felt his warm, comforting arms around me, I knew he was here with me. I cried against his chest, happy to see him again.

''Rob-''

''I know, I know.'' He whispered against my hair.

But eventually, the tears ended as soon as I started to feel tired again.

***


	51. Flight to London

Rob never came back after I had gone asleep, no matter how many times that I tried to ring him. I had until tonight to get hold of him, and I left countless messages but still nothing. I prayed that he would contact me back and I would stay with him in LA, but I got nothing.

So with a heavy sigh, I boarded the plane with Nick, who promised me that he was going to 'look after me' from now on, and prove to me that he was worth my time and effort in moving to London with him.

I forced a smile, knowing that it was wrong to give him false hopes, but knowing that I couldn't do anything about that either. Nick was a very determined kind-of Guy, and although it was wrong; I was lonely and had totally given up in everything now that it was clear that Rob just didn't want to know.

I wondered to myself-as I took my seat on the plane-what I could have done to upset Rob. I mean I had been upset, but…why had he just decided to leave me like that, after he could see just how depressed I was without him?

One side of me longed for him to come back and comfort me again, and tell me that everything was going to be okay, and that he didn't hate me, and he _wanted_ me. And the other side was the complete opposite.

The other side hated him for leaving me here like this, after I had longed for him. He could see just how upset I was without him, but still he left me, without another word to me. That made me angry.

And it didn't help with the fact that the plane home had the most boring selection of movies. All old films, and I couldn't seem to find one single film to keep me occupied and less…tiresome, shall we say?

And it didn't help with the fact that I had Nick sat right next to me, blabbering on about something or other to do with London, and how he was excited about leaving LA behind. I didn't necessarily agree.

I mean, I was trying to listen to, but how could I listen when I had a picture of this gorgeous, talented Man in my head. That man was Rob Pattinson, incase you were wondering. He was always in my thoughts, but today?

Today seemed to be at its worst, especially with how I kept questioning myself over and over again in my head about what I could have said exactly to make him so mad with me to leave so abruptly like that.

I could think of no good reason. Besides the fact that I made a complete fool of myself, and he couldn't stand being with me for a mere second longer. Now that made a lot of sense to me. Especially as he hated me, like he did.

''Well, London here we come then.'' Nick turned to grin at me. I smiled back, knowing that I wouldn't look nearly as happy as he did right now. But then…what did he expect when I wanted the one thing that hated me most?

''I just want you to know that…well, I'm going to prove to you that I am worthy of you.'' He told me, taking my hand in his own hand and making me squirm awkwardly in my chair. He didn't notice, of course.

''Okay.'' I replied awkwardly, snatching my and back and looking away awkwardly, because I wanted his hand to belong to Rob's. and nothing he would say was going to make the pain go away.

***


	52. Putting Up With It

**The house that we moved to was very lovely; very homely styled. It reminded me a little bit like my Aunt Kim and Uncle Mark's house in Essex, London with its neighborly fashion. However, there was one crucial difference. **

**This big, open-styled house was perched on its own, and about half a mile away from any other houses. It was similar to the houses in Los Angeles; posh and modern, going by the outside of the house. **

**The outside was wooden styled and polished, and actually looked more posh than how our house had been, back in Los Angeles. There was a small, wooden table to match the house, and that was set aside the house, in the back garden. **

**There was a huge swimming pool outside the back garden too, and I hated to think about how much this house even cost. Just looking at it, made me winch. Even the bedrooms were big, and open-planned. **

**The living room had just been the same, same as the spacious kitchen; combined with the kitchen table for four people to sit on. It gave me a headache just looking around at all of the rooms, because it was just far too big and open. **

**I couldn't get a job here in the West End London, because nobody was actually 'taking on' apparently, according to the staff at each shop, restaurant and hotel. I hardly believed that, but I just had to keep moving on. **

**But Nick didn't mind, because he would come back from rehearsals and shows at the West End show that he was in, and shower me with flowers and gifts…at least, he tried to. I wouldn't accept, though. **

**Nick had convinced me into giving us a try, but the more that I did what he said; the more that I couldn't stand his idea. I didn't want Nick as my Boyfriend or anything close to that. I wanted Rob. **

**But I tried to get on with things, cleaning the house more for him to come home to as I hadnt yet found a job, and Nick didn't mind. He would rather shower me with gifts rather than complain about my lack of money income. **

**And, I had to admit…I did find that kinda sleazy, if I was being honest. I mean…how many times did I have to tell someone that I just wanted to be friends with them? I mean…Nick knew I held a torch for Rob, but he wouldn't let it bother him. **

**I stayed at home whilst he did more and more shows in the West End of London, gaining more and more recognition and excellent reviews from the press with the show; the more famous that Nick became. **

**I didn't let it bother me though, because I wasn't somebody who hung around more celebrities just to get famous. I mean…why should I be phased by Nick's newfound fame? Yeah, I was happy for him, but…I still didn't want to be part of it. **

**But clearly Nick had thought that I did. Because I could fell him dropping more and more hints as we ate together in the kitchen, about wanting to take our relationship to another level, but…I wasn't going to say anything. **

**I definitely didn't want us going anywhere near that kinda area. There had been only one Guy that I had found gloriously beautiful, and very attractive in that kinds way. I had wanted Rob, I had wanted Rob in every single way even though we were only dating for a few days. **

**But the thing was…I had wanted him that way even before I had met him. I had definitely found him attractive in every single way, and when I had met him…my god, it had been too much to bear. **

**Nobody would understand how I…had to restrain myself back almost from being too eager. He meant the world to me, and although I hated to admit; nobody would ever come close, not even Nick. **

**But I tried, I really did; to soak up his emotions, gifts and flowers with a smile and a kiss or two, but…I knew that our relationship would definitely not be physical, as far as I was concerned. I hadn't been there before, and I didn't want to either; not with someone that I only partly loved and wanted. **

**I wanted someone to really catch my eye, to really sweep me off my feet with the same chemistry that me and Rob had and somehow I just knew that I wasn't going to find it again. Not unless I found Rob. **

**Nevertheless, I got on with things and almost expected that Nick would just stay with me. The more famous he got, the less he gave me gifts, but I didn't mind that. Because I found it embarrassing when Nick showed me with flowers and stuff. **

**I didn't expect things to change so abruptly like they were about to, however…**

*******


	53. Chucked Out

**I gasped in shock as my suitcase with all my things was thrown carelessly from the window. I felt absolutely furious with that bastard now! How dare he throw me out after demanding that I went to the fucking shop to get some 'milk' for a cup of tea, and then throwing me out. **

''**This is so not fucking over, you little prick! Just you wait until you have to go out again; I will fucking **_**kill**_** you!'' I promised Nick furiously. How dare he just throw me out on the street like how he was. **

**He laughed carefree in response. ''Incase that wasn't clear enough for you, you're **_**dumped**_**!'' He shouted out, trying to impress his new, 'cool', friends of his at the stage show. He thought he was clever because he could act cool in front of them. **

''**That's funny; you have to be in a relationship with someone to dump them. Incase you didn't notice Nick; you meant nothing to me compared to how Rob meant to me!'' I shouted back at him furiously. **

**I ignored him then, and grabbed my suitcase; stomping out of the garden with no idea on where to go. I cried as I walked myself to the nearest hotel around the corner from our house, which was extortionate. **

**It was sixty pounds a night to stay there; something which I didn't know about. But I had to pay it because had nowhere else to go in London. My other family who lived in London lived on the other side of London, and I had no way to get to them besides the tube. **

**But then, how could I get there with no ticket and not much time before it really started to get dark. I put my stuff down in my hotel room and got changed into a ballerina-style dress after deciding that I needed to go out and consequently get drunk. **

**I understood that it wasn't the right decision to make, but right now; I didn't really care. I just needed to get drunk, and stop thinking about things. I was so mad with Nick, I could have actually hit him; so it was a good job that I left to get drunk when I did. **

**It was sleeveless, but was skinny-fit, with small, ballerina frills at the bottom of the small, black dress which made it look pretty. I checked to make sure that my hair was okay, straight and natural at the same time, and went out to get drunk after I had put my make-up on. **

**I went to the nearest bar around the corner and as soon as I was safely in there, I kept ordering more and more drinks, and shots together; feeling drunk by eight. I wanted to forget all about the pain that I was feeling right now.**

**And I had to admit that the more that I drunk, the more that I started to feel numb, and free from pain. Good, because that meant that soon I would be hammered and free of any such emotions. That's where I wanted to be right now. **

''**Excuse me, miss,'' I looked up at the bar man in shock after hearing his London accent, confused. Not that I really cared what he had to say; I wanted to be left in peace to drown my sorrows. **

''**You were ordered a free drink by the Gentleman sitting over there.'' He admitted, pointing down to the bar. I shook my head, feeling sure that he had got that wrong. Nobody would have wanted to buy me a drink what with the state that I was in. **

''**There must be a mistake.'' I replied sourly, shaking my head. The Barman shook his head, looking sure that he hadn't made **

''**No, no. No mistake…the Gentleman clearly said that this was to be given to you.'' He told me, handing me a glass of tonic water. I huffed in response, feeling angry with whoever's joke it was. Because obviously it was a fucking joke. **

''**Who the fucking hell do this Guy thinks he is?'' I demanded angrily, turning around at the bar and preparing myself to have a go at whoever had brought me something, non alcoholic too for a fucking laugh. **

**But instead…I bumped right into someone. A black suit. I frowned, knowing that he had definitely bumped into me, and looked up angrily; preparing myself to have a go at whoever this clumsy idiot who wasn't watching where he was going; the alcohol was clearly getting to me, after all. **

**I gasped in shock as soon as I looked up at the beautiful face; feeling my cheeks redden furiously in response to this Guy. He was still here, still the same as ever; and definitely more beautiful; no doubt about that. **

**It was Rob, my Rob. **

*******


	54. A Chance Meeting

His hair was flattened down, with small spikes of hair spiked up neatly. His small, present beard was growing faster now, and was covering his beautiful, structured jaw. He was wearing a casual, black vest and a smart black suit to match.

In fact, like me; he was dressed in all black, exactly like how I was right now. He smiled sheepishly at me, and his slightly widened, green-grey eyes looked away from my own brown, widened eyes and down to my tonic water.

He held it up and handed me it, still smiling sheepishly at me as he did. Something told me that he had been the one to buy this tonic water, and I guessed that if he had, then he had done it because he really was worried about my drinking.

It was predictable what with Rob's gentleness, and kindness.

''Sorry if my offer infuriated you.'' He apologized sincerely, watching me closely with those gorgeous, green eyes. I watched him back closely, noticing just how much I had missed those probing, mysterious eyes of his.

I huffed in response, clearing my throat awkwardly. ''Not exactly…I'd just have preferred it to be alcoholic.'' I admitted honestly, shrugging the truth off even though my heart was beating erratically in my chest in response to just his presence.

I yearned to touch him, to kiss him, but I was to be good. We were not together anymore, and it would probably have been easier for us both if we were just friends anyway; in the long run that was.

''Hmm,'' he said thoughtfully, looking back to the bar and glancing at my ten, empty shots on the bar. ''So I see.'' He added quietly. I looked down at my drinks on the bar shyly, wondering to myself why I had let myself get so many shots.

''So may I ask…'' he started curiously, looking back to me and watching me with those soft, probing grey eyes of his. ''Why you want to get yourself as wasted…as you clearly are?'' He asked me curiously; sounding somewhat worried about my choice in doing so.

I huffed in response, turning back to the bar and sighing heavily. ''Don't laugh, and don't tell me you said so, but…'' I trailed off, watching Rob take a seat on the bar stool next to me, before I forced myself to take a deep breathe and tell him.

''Nick dumped me, even though we weren't technically dating and threw me out without any warning. He threw my stuff out, packing it for me whilst I was out, and all because he's a fucking star now.'' I spelled it out for him.

I expected him to laugh, but he didn't. ''You're kidding?'' He asked me in shock. I shook my head in response, feeling somewhat humiliated with my choice in leaving to London with someone like Nick.

I shook my head, frowning sadly as I thought about what I had done. I was an idiot and it was all my fault for being here. Again.

''Look, do you want to sit over at a table with me? Its just that I want to carry on talking to you.'' Rob asked me curiously. I nodded, and followed him over to the table with my tonic water in hand.

I smiled shyly at him as I followed him, hoping that…well for once I had a chance to put some of the wrongs back to a right again, so that me and Rob could hopefully…be friends again. That would mean a lot to me.

***

**Right sorry Guys, but this is my last chapter for a while. I'll stil be writing chapters but I won't be able to upload them until next Sunday, as I'm on holiday in Guys!!!!**


	55. Having FunI'm back btw, lol!

I walked over to the table with him, to see someone that I definitely recognized. With his dark, messy hair and boyish beauty; it was definitely Tom Sturridge; Rob's best friend. I had seen enough pictures of him in the press before.

He was definitely a lot more beautiful in the flesh though, bless him. His dark hair was possibly more erratic looking than Rob's own hair, which was saying something what with how Rob always ran his hands through the very top of his messy hair.

His fringe was displayed messily across his forehead, just above his strange, light grey eyes. He was wearing a loose, white shirt and black trousers and was sat at the table with a blonde Girl, talking to him.

''Hey Tom,'' Rob called above the jazz-styled bar music. Tom looked up after sharing a joke with the Blonde Girl sat next to him and grinned at his best friend. ''This is Charlie, the Girl I was telling you about.'' Rob added, making me confused.

I glanced at him confused, wondering what exactly he had said about me. I mean, it definitely couldn't be all good things what with the way I behaved back in America with him. It got me worried.

He turned to look at me, appraising me for a long moment like a best friend should, before nodding his head once in appreciation. It was real hard for me not to blush bright red in response, but I managed it somehow.

''So this is the young lady that my best buddy's so infatuated with.'' Tom grinned at us both, watching us as if it was all some big joke, before laughing his sentence off easily how like a best friend probably would.

But me? I found it a lot more awkward for me to take in. And why, I hear you ask? After all, I should have been delighted with this idea. But in all truths; I found it very awkward due to Tom admitting it to me.

And I looked to my right to see that Rob was having the same trouble accepting that his friend had just blurted out this news to me. His right hand ran to the front of his hair like normal with his embarrassment, and not only that either.

His cheeks turned from the pale, light color that they were, right to a bright red color; almost giving me some competition there; what with how much I blushed all the time in response to the smallest things being said.

''Ur…thanks Tom.'' Rob replied awkwardly, before quickly looking away after he had noticed that I was watching him. I turned away quickly too; ignoring Tom's laughter and Rob's embarrassment.

They both made me feel awkward, beyond compare; if I was being honest. I wasn't used to Rob getting so embarrassed over me and it felt weird; being the cause of that blush on his cheeks, and not really in a good way either.

''Don't mention it buddy.'' Tom replied casually-not sounding at all bothered over Rob's embarrassment-and winked at his best friend, playfully. He wrapped an arm around the back of the pretty blonde Girl sat next to him, and drank a swig of beer from his bottle.

I followed Rob around the table, and sat next to him as he took his place next to his best friend at the table, feeling slightly unsure if I should actually be here or not. I mean, he had invited me over, but…it felt weird to be sat next to Rob like this, and so casually too; after everything that had happened between us two.

Tom went back to talking to the blonde Girl then, which left me and Rob in utter silence as he drank his beer, and I drank back my tonic water. I wasn't too sure what I should say to him, if I was being truthful.

''You know,'' Rob began. I turned my head and look at him in time to see him leaning closer slightly so that he could talk to me easier. ''I really could punch Nick for him throwing you out like that.'' He admitted sheepishly.

He watched me take that in, and I did try to smile in response, though it was hard. You see; I was a typical Beatles fan at heart, a hippie, and I didn't like violence. That was the one thing I hated in this world, along with hate and wars, and I didn't really like hearing that from him.

''Well…I'm sorry to say it but…violence wouldn't get you anywhere.'' I admitted, because it was true. ''You would only get into a fight with him, and either way; win or lose, you'd both be losing for getting down to his level.'' True, I liked to think.

''You're right.'' Rob agreed with me, nodding once in response. I smiled and quickly looked away again. ''But I still think what he did was wrong. I mean…let me just get this straight; he dumped you because he's some star now?'' Rob asked me confused.

I huffed. ''That, and the fact that I wouldn't go near him with a barge pole.'' I admitted, because it was true. ''We were supposed to be dating, but well…I think that he pretty much guessed that my feelings had turned into nothing a few days ago.'' I admitted truthfully.

''Why is that? I mean, why do you feel like you don't feel absolute _anything_ for him now?'' Rob asked me confused.

I looked back at his confused face, and smiled. I knew perfectly well why. ''Because he knew what I knew; as soon as we had reached London, I was mourning for someone else…I was mourning for you.'' I spelled it out for him.

He nodded, watching me closely for a moment, before looking away quickly as he thought on something or other; pursing his lips and furrowing his forehead as he thought hard about me admitting that.

''Well, what about the Girls? I mean, you're on good terms with them, right?'' He asked me confused. I could clearly hear a small amount of hope in his voice as he asked me too. I kept my eyes to the floor as I replied.

''No exactly. I left ten minutes after you and Rachael was still adamant that she didn't want me coming back to LA again, anytime soon.'' I confessed, because it was true. He nodded in response, looking somewhat upset about that prospect after I had looked back up at him for his reply.

''God…and you're not on good terms with any of them?'' He asked me in shock. I shook my head.

''Not really. I haven't spoken to any of them since.'' I replied truthfully. He nodded again, still looking in shock.

''I'm sorry to hear that.'' He replied awkwardly; sounding as though he wasn't too sure what he should say to me now. I shrugged in response, because there was no point dwelling on it now. I would just have to stay in England.

''Don't worry about it. I tend not to dwell on it; I find it easier that way.'' I admitted, because again; that was true. When I thought about it too much, it just made the pain all that more worse; to know that I had no friends now, and over something stupid.

''Well…obviously you're staying with me and Tom.'' Rob admitted firmly, making me confused now.

''What do you mean?'' I asked him, confused.

He looked back to me, and smiled. A charming, irresistible smile at that. ''I'm not just going to let you stay wherever you are staying at tonight by yourself. You'll be staying with us tonight.'' He promised me.

''But I have a hotel. I've already paid the sixty pounds up front.'' I admitted, because it was true. I wasn't going to waste sixty pounds, just like that.

''I'll pay you the sixty pounds back.'' He promised me sweetly. However, as soon as he mentioned him paying me-no matter how much money-I instantly winched in response. I hated other people paying for me.

''Nah….there's no need for that. I don't want your money.'' I promised him, because I hated to think that he really would do that for me. I knew for a fact that he would though; I could see the sincerity of his promise in his gazing green-grey eyes.

I still couldn't decide what color they were exactly. Green or grey; they were the color of a bit of both, really.

''Well either way, you're staying with us. I'm not going to take a no for an answer.'' He told me stubbornly. I sighed heavily in response, and forced myself to nod. I would stay, just as long as he didn't offer me money again.

I wasn't a charity and I wasn't a goldigger. I didn't like people paying for me.

''Fair enough, but I'm not taking any money from you.'' I warned him, because it was true. If I'd have wanted his money, I would have asked for it. But I knew that I wouldn't have, still. Because I didn't like accepting money easily.

''Fine, well in that case; you don't have to pay any rent.'' He promised me, making me sigh heavily in response. I wasn't too sure if he thought that I was a charity case or something, but I didn't like the fact that he was doing this for me; for whatever his reasons.

''That's not fair. I'm not a charity case.'' I warned him stubbornly; sounding as pissed off as I felt. I was struggling not to glare at him at this moment; especially if he was doing this for the reasons that I thought he was.

He nodded, smiling innocently at me in response. ''I didn't say that you were. This is me; your friend, helping you out.'' He promised me.

''But…how can you say that we're friends? After everything that I did to you too?'' I asked him confused, struggling to reason with myself about why he was being so nice to me. I definitely didn't deserve it.

He smiled sheepishly and looked down to the floor as he replied to my question. ''I love you, Charlie; that you already know full well. But…I'd like it if we could be friends. It would be better that way, don't you think?'' He asked me curiously.

I nodded in agreement, because I thought that he had a valuable point there. All the stuff that had happened to us might have just been karma telling us that we just weren't meant to be together. Now that made perfect sense.

''Anyway,'' Rob sighed happily. ''Do you want another drink?'' He asked me curiously; with us both watching Tom stumble back over to the bar to get more drinks for himself. We both laughed in response.

''Not for the minute, thanks. Though I do think that somebody needs to sort your friend, Tom out. He looks completely wasted.'' I worried, because it was true. Rob laughed in response again, and sighed.

''I think you're right. Give me a sec to sort him out, and I'll be right back then.'' He promised me. I nodded and watched him walk over to Tom at the bar, and have a word with him. Tom shrugged, and went to sit back down with a bottle of tonic water in his hand.

Rob sighed and shook his head as soon as he had caught my attention, making me smile in response. It was sweet to know that Tom had Rob to look after him like that; something typically nice that Rob would do.

Rob came and sit back down next to me, with a bottle of beer in his hand. Another one. ''So…getting drunk tonight, _new friend_?'' I asked him playfully. He just laughed in response and nodded.

''Uh huh, and so are you, _twilight bud_.'' He replied, handing me a small glass filled with clear liquid in a shot glass. I giggled in response, taking the glass in my hands.

''Thanks, twilight bud.'' I replied happily.

''That's alright, I have my own.'' Rob admitted, taking his own shot into his hands. ''On the count of three?'' He asked me.

''Ah, why not.'' I agreed happily, shrugging.

''One, two, three!'' We said together before we both poured the shot down our necks, with me grimacing in response and making Rob laugh. That had been one hell of a strong, shot liquid. Maybe even stronger than vodka, if possible.

''Fucking hell; that was strong!'' I complained.

Rob laughed in response, putting our glasses back onto the table. ''I'm not a pushover. If I do shots, its got to be strong.'' He admitted smugly.

''Well…I think you should get some more in then, twilight bud.'' I grinned at him. He chuckled, and took my shot glass from me, and went to the bar to go and get some more of them shots for us.

Tom joined us after Rob walked back though, and it kinda started into a bit of a competition about who could down it faster. And the more that I drank, the harder I found it to keep my eyes off of Rob.

This was definitely going to be a wild night.

***


	56. Some Kind Of A Joke!

**All I could say the next morning was my fucking head. It was killing me; literally. I had the world's biggest hangover, I couldn't remember a single, bloody thing from the night before, and er…**

**I rolled over in bed, and my worst nightmares were confirmed as I saw that Rob was lying next to me in the same bed as me, and appeared to be naked from here. I couldn't tell as the duvet was covering him, but his chest was bare. **

**This was not good at all, but yet…I was sure that we definitely hadn't had sex last night. I would have surely remembered that right? I mean….yeah, I was absolutely wrecked, and I kept looking at Rob, but…I would have remembered my first official time; especially with Rob. **

**Either way, I couldn't ask him yet because he was still fast asleep; his heavy breathing echoing in my ear as I got up from the bed. I shivered in response, hoping that that was the only heavy breathing he had been making last night. **

**I quickly wrapped my dressing gown around me as I only had on my night shorts and vest top and got myself to the shower; cursing myself the whole way to the bathroom about Rob and me sleeping in the same bed, together. **

''**Hello gorgeous.'' I screamed and jumped around in shock after hearing Rob's cheeky, flirting voice and put a hand to my erratically beating heart. He had fucking scared me, especially with what he said!**

''**Do not scare me like that and do not call me gorgeous. We're just friends, remember?'' I reminded him, even though I wasn't too sure that we were anymore. Especially if we had…slept together as in **_**together**_**. **

**His forehead furrowed in shock as I said that. ''What, after last night?'' He asked me offended, making me panic. **

''**What-''**

''**We had sex remember?'' Rob reminded me, making me gasp in shock. No way; this was actually real. Oh my god! ''You told me that you'd love me forever and everything. I'm offended; you forgot all about it.''**

''**Okay…please tell me that you're joking…please?'' I begged him. He grinned in response, and shook his head, making me gasp in shock. Now what the fuck was I supposed to do? I had slept with someone officially for the first time in my life and I couldn't even remember it. **

*******


	57. Very Funny not!

''Ha ha, I'm only joking. Sorry hon, but it was worth it; just to see the look on your face!'' Rob spelled it out for me, making me gasp again in shock. How the fuck could he have done that to me, the bastard!

''Ugh, I fucking hate you, you know that.'' I shouted at him, throwing a pillow at him and making him laugh.

''That wasn't what you were saying last night. In fact you were practically screaming it at me.'' He added, making me blush bright red. God, why did he have to say it like that for? Embarrassment, much?

''In your dreams maybe.'' I huffed back, knowing that that wasn't exactly all true. If his Ex was right, Rob Pattinson was supposed to be…well…amazing in bed. Something that…in my dreams that I definitely wanted to play out.

''I can dream.''

''You can, but it wont happen.'' I promised him, knowing that every word was a lie. To me, anyway. We may be best friends now, but god…I wanted to. That urge was just…way too needy to ignore.

''That's what you think, but we'll see soon enough. Maybe one day we'll be alone in this house, and the heating will break down-like it sometimes does-and we'll have to cuddle together. And you'll beg for me to get closer to make you warmer.'' He pictured it all out, making me huff in response.

He grinned and carried on speaking. ''And then we'll get closer and closer until we both just cant take anymore tension between us, and we'll give in and have the best possible sex that you could imagine-''

''Ugh…Rob, you're so disgusting.'' I told him, shocked by his outrageous flirting, but knowing by the big old grin on his face that he was just kidding around. He winked at me playfully in response.

''You love it.'' He was right. I did love it; it brought another few thousand fantasies swimming into my head.

''Yeah, you're right; I just love it so much…and that's why I'm going to the bathroom to be sick.'' I lied, making him laugh in response. ''By the way…what happened last night?'' I asked him confused.

He shrugged. ''Nothing much; we were all wasted, Tom fell into his bed, and I basically fell into this one, holding you after you were asleep in the taxi.'' He admitted.

''Oh.'' I replied, blushing bright red again before heading to the bathroom to play out these new fantasies in my head whilst I had a shower. What, I couldn't help it, could I? He'd put the thought into my head after all.

***


	58. Oops

When I walked back into the bedroom after having my shower, with my blue, grey and white striped dress on; Rob had fallen asleep again, which I think was a good thing. From the way that he was talking, it seemed that he had still been drunk.

I left him to sleep it off and walked downstairs to see Tom sat at the kitchen table, hand on his head and drinking a disgusting-looking, tomato juice. I winched in response and walked over to him.

''Hangover?'' I asked him curiously. He groaned in response and nodded; taking a big gulp of his tomato juice. I laughed in response, taking a seat next to him at the kitchen table, and pouring myself a glass of water.

''Yeah, a great big one. How's your head?'' He asked me curiously.

''Not so bad anymore. It's just sickness now.'' I admitted truthfully. He nodded and took another sip of his tomato juice.

''The funny thing was; Rob was more drunk than the rest of us, which is saying something with how drunk we were.'' Tom admitted, grinning at me. I grinned back in response because I definitely thought that Rob had still been drunk this morning.

''Yeah, and I had a pretty good feeling that he was still drunk this morning. Luckily, he's gone back to sleep.'' I added, laughing it off easily. Tom laughed too, sounding somewhat impressed by that.

''He probably was.'' He agreed easily before we both ate a small bowl of cereal for our breakfast. An hour later, and there was still no sign of Rob. I walked back into my room but I didn't find him so I walked into his bedroom to see him walking out of his bathroom.

I grinned at him, but he groaned in response, holding a bottle of water to his mouth. ''Feeling alright?'' I asked him curiously. He groaned again in response to that.

''Okay, I guess. I still feel a bit tipsy though.'' He admitted honestly, making me laugh in response. I thought that he was, especially with how he was acting this morning around me. It was virtually obvious because I knew for a fact that that wasn't how he normally behaved. He was usually very shy.

''I could tell from this morning. Do you even remember what you said to me exactly?'' I asked him humorously. He groaned in response, making me laugh. I took that as a simple no to that question.

''No. Why did I say something really bad then?'' Rob asked me confused.

''Let's just say that you really don't want to know.'' I admitted honestly. He laughed in response, rolling his eyes as he thought through what he could have said to himself. I waked downstairs with him, and let him have his breakfast as I went outside to have a cigarette.

Rob came out after had had his breakfast and sat down next to me on the garden bench. ''So er…do you remember what happened last night?'' Rob asked me unsure, making me laugh in response. Was it that bad?

''No, why? Did I do anything really embarrassing?'' I asked him unsure, praying that I didn't. I didn't really remember anything from the night before, not properly anyway. It was all sort-of…faded.

Rob laughed in response, confirming my fears. I groaned in response, hiding my face in embarrassment with my hands.

''It was me who was embarrassing. Well…kinda.'' He added, laughing again as he remembered the night from before. I got ready to be told something embarrassing that I had done last night. It was bound to happen.

''Tom wrote a load of crap on my chest last night when we were walking home.'' He admitted embarrassed, making me laugh in response. I didn't even remember us walking home. How funny.

''I think we were all just too drunk to get a taxi, to be honest.'' He admitted, laughing. ''But it was a laugh. You were so funny; you kept talking about how you loved me lol, as a friend lol and as a fan.'' He admitted.

I groaned in embarrassment in response, just my style. I don't know what else I expected from me really, especially when I was drunk. I was always so embarrassing when I was drunk, so I could just imagine it.

''It was funny though actually. And you caught a few lads attention last night.'' He admitted, laughing again. I looked up in shock, looking at him confused. Because, I still couldn't remember that bit.

''Did I?'' I asked him, confused.

''Hell yes…they were proper giving you the eye. You didn't even notice.'' He admitted. ''They were quite good looking too….I think…but you were just too busy dancing around a lamppost.'' He admitted, making me gasp in response.

''No, I didn't!'' I exclaimed in shock.

He nodded, still grinning at me. ''Yeah, but it wasn't really your fault; not really. Tom dared you to do it, and he was cheering you on. And you were completely drunk too.'' He added, making excuses for me.

I rolled my eyes in response, because there was just no excuse for that kinds behavior. Drunk or not. Making a fool of myself seemed to be something that I truly did best these days, and god, it was embarrassing.

''No excuse.'' I replied in shock.

''Those Guys were also cheering you on too. They really seemed to like you, but er…it was a fun night.'' He admitted happily. I smiled back, because it certainly sounded like a fun night, even if I couldn't remember it.

''I bet everybody thought we were mad or something.'' I laughed as I thought about my crazy behavior last night. Rob laughed too, running a hand through the very top of his messy, morning hair.

''Not really; nobody really looked besides these Guys. But er…I think they were just drunk.'' He admitted, dashing my hopes of getting attention just because…well, somebody might have thought that I was good looking or whatever, or funny or whatever.

That might sound really vain, but…well, I'd only had a few past relationships in the past, and none of those had worked out for very long; just like how me and Nick hadn't, and I never really particularly thought that I was beautiful.

I'd never called myself beautiful by any means, and although Rob and I were close, that still remained the same. I didn't see myself as beautiful in every particular way. Or talented; writing books was easy, not really a talent.

''But I think that everyone in America thinks we're alcoholics. Me, Kellan and Jackson were seen drinking out every night.'' He admitted with an easy laugh. ''The funny thing was the paparazzi mostly left you Girls alone, even though you was with us all the time. That's a real good thing.'' He carried on.

I listened carefully as he did, smiling in response. ''It is.'' I agreed.

''I didn't want our fame to cause any trouble for you guys.'' He admitted considerately, making me smile. ''I mean…when I agreed to…start a relationship with you…I didn't do it to get you famous. I just wanted it to be…just us, I guess.'' He admitted sweetly.

Despite the awkwardness of the situation, how he was talking about the part when we were together; even though it was a short while…it kinda made me happy. But I still felt awkward beyond belief.

''Do you like the attention that you get?'' I asked him curiously, even though I knew that he didn't. It was to change the subject; because I didn't want to talk about us right now, if I could really help it.

''The only way that I can describe it now is…it probably sounds silly, but…its like…your life, you're walking along the street, as a really bad analogy, you step on a stone, and it just kind of flies away. And then you are just trying not to drown afterwards…that's my life now.'' He admitted, picturing it all out for me.

Others might have been confused with the phrase, but it made perfect sense to me. I knew exactly what he was talking about, and my hart literally ached for him. I may have been a fan girl, but I was true.

I had loved him since I had seen him, I had screamed at him when I saw him on television, but I wasn't half as bad. If I saw him in the street, I wouldn't have run over to him whilst he was doing his shopping, just trying to be a normal guy and scream in his face or wrap my arms around him and try to hug him.

It was a intrusion of privacy and what amazed me most these days when it came to fame and celebrities was how people were getting away with it. It was just plain rude, and it needed to be stopped now.

Rob wasn't a piece of meat and although I probably didn't help facts; I would have never done half of what these fan girls did to him. The paparazzi was messing people's lives up big time. Rob especially.

''I'm sorry.'' I apologized quietly, for every person that had ever annoyed him before. I hugged him; not because I was another fan, but because I was his best friend and I totally loved him as that.

''Don't mention it.'' He whispered into the top of my hair, hugging me back.

I wished I could help him somehow, to make his pain fade away, because I couldn't stand to see anyone in so much pain as the pain that Rob was clearly in. It all didn't seem very fair to me, and the more that I thought about it; the harder it was for me not to cry.

''Hey…are you crying?'' Rob asked me in shock, pulling me away so that he could look at me properly. I shook y head, trying to cover my face with my hands but failing miserably. He had already seen the traitor tears slip past my eyes.

''Why are you crying for?'' Rob asked me in shock, rubbing the tears away from my face as soon as they fell.

''It's just me…being silly. I just…I hate it when I think about what you have to face. I know its escapable and I probably don't help matters by being a fan, but…it really upsets me, you know?'' I explained, feeling stupid now.

''Ah, Charlie.'' He sighed a chuckle and pressed me back into his arms again, helping me to stop crying.

''I really love you, you know.'' I promised him, because it was true.

He tipped my head back then, and I didn't have time to ask what he was doing; because his lips had already pressed onto mine. Shit! I had given him completely the wrong idea. I hadn't thought about that.

He groaned as soon as his lips had found mine and he was on me, his lips urgently pressed against mine, but I pushed him away from me, shocking him.

''I'm sorry…it's just that…I love you as a best friend. I'm sorry that I gave you the wrong impression. I really didn't mean to.'' I promised him, feeling even more guilty than I could have ever felt.

''Don't apologize. It was my fault.'' He backed away from me, keeping his eyes away from mine in embarrassment. I hugged him, trying to give him any comfort that I could. He meant a hell of a lot to me, but I wanted him there was my best friend.

''I truly love you as my friend, you know that? You mean a lot to me, but I just…I don't want to ruin things.'' I promised him, because it was true.

He rested his head on the top of mine and kissed the top of my head; despite how hard I knew I was always making things for him.

It was always my fault, and I did feel really guilty if I lead him onto kissing me like that. I didn't think that I had, but I couldn't help but wonder and blame myself too. He was my best friend, and I didn't want him to keep getting the wrong idea from me.

''I love you too…as my friend. I'm sorry that I was…er….rude. That was wrong of me to kiss you like that.'' He apologized.

I sighed, feeling even more guilty now that he had apologized to me. I couldn't help but blame myself for it.

***


	59. Not Telling

I'd been at the house for a week and I hadn't paid any rent, because Rob said it was fine. I felt really guilty though and I did want to pay at least a little bit of money to help them up with food, or whatever.

But I wasn't allowed.

Rob paid Tom his monthly rent, as Tom was the one to pay it all, and I watched on the living room sofa as he did; eating my breakfast quietly and waiting for Rob to leave so that I could do what I wanted to do.

As soon as Rob was walking up the stairs, I walked over to Tom; prepared to give him the rent that I knew that I owed. It was only fair; Rob had paid his rent too, after all. Why should I be any different?

''Here, take this.'' I suggested, handing him a thirty pound note. It wasn't much, but it was better than nothing, and would pay them back more as soon as I got a job and could afford to give them more.

Tom looked from me to the money in my hand in shock. ''Don't be silly, keep it.'' He replied easily; pushing the money away from him. I sighed heavily, knowing that I should have expected this.

''I want you to have it.''

''Well, I want you to keep it.''

''Rob paid his rent, and so should I.'' I replied, trying to hand him back the money. I couldn't live here for free.

''Rob's different; he has money coming in. And anyway, you're a friend of Rob's, and if you're a friend of his, you're a friend of mine.'' He added, grinning at me.

I sighed heavily. ''Are you going to take the money?''

''Ur…nope.'' He replied, grinning at me still.

I rolled my eyes in response and put the money away again, feeling really guilty now because I wasn't paying rent.

''Thanks…but you know that I feel really guilty for not paying rent now.'' I admitted, making him laugh.

''Don't worry about it.'' He replied casually. ''Anyway…did you get those Guys numbers the other night?'' He asked, confusing me.

''What Guys? I mean; its no good asking me. I was completely wasted, and even now; I cant remember a single thing that I did the other night…as-well as every other night.'' I admitted, making him laugh easily in response to that.

''Well, you danced around a pole, and er…a few Guys caught your eye.'' He admitted, still smiling as he thought about it.

''Oh yeah; Rob said they watched or something and they were drunk. But that was it.'' I replied, shrugging in response.

''Well…it wasn't just that. You got talking to them, and the Guys quite liked you. Gave you they're number's apparently.'' He added, making me confused.

I didn't remember that and Rob definitely hadn't told me that. So…why hadn't he told me exactly? You know…dropping it into the conversation or whatever. It was something that you usually did when you were just talking about stuff.

''Oh. Rob didn't tell me that when we were talking about the other day.''

''He probably just forgot. I think though…to be honest with you…he was a little worried about you. Just because you didn't know who they were, and these Guys were proper keen on you.'' He admitted honestly.

I nodded, quickly looking away again. Maybe Rob had been genially worried, but…well, it seemed too much of a coincidence to me-after the kiss the other day-if I was being honest, but maybe I was just being silly again.

***

**Shall I do a Rob POV outtake soon? Review and tell me what you think of the story so far and if I should or not. I'd appreciate it. A lot. **


	60. Guitar

It was such a laugh, living with the Guys at the house. We were usually out drinking every night, which was always a laugh. Tom was usually out in the day though, filming a new film that he was in, whilst Rob mostly stayed at the house with me.

He was taking a break from filming and stuff, which was well deserved in my eyes. So, it was normally just me and Rob at the house, and as I didn't pay rent; I cleared the house instead. There was often a lot of washing up to do if we headed back to the house after a party.

Rob often left me alone in the house and sat on the roof, with his guitar in hand and sang a few songs, by himself. I always left him alone when he did, because I believed that he had the right to that time alone to think straight and do what he wanted to do.

Once I was done with the washing up though, I went up to the roof to see if Rob wanted any lunch or anything, as he had been on the roof for a long time. He always was when he had his guitar with him.

I walked up to the roof and walked over to him, hearing his beautiful singing for myself. It was hard to take in really; a beautiful voice like that was always going to be hard to take in. He was just too talented.

As soon as he saw me though, he stopped playing automatically and smiled at me sheepishly. I grinned back at him, wishing that he had kept playing his music really. He had a beautiful voice, and I loved to hear him sing.

I was a big fan of his music.

''Hey, you.'' I continued grinning at him, sitting next to him on the big, red cushion that he had brought out with him from our living room sofa. It felt just as floppy as it looked; soft, like marshmallows.

''Hey,'' he replied casually, strumming the chords on his guitar one last time, lazily. He took one look at me, gave a small smile, and looked away; out to the clear, blue sky again.

It was lovely in London today…kinda. It was the middle of winter, but the sun was out, and high in the sky. The sky was bright blue, cloud free mostly. But the wind was still evident; making it feel a little chilly on this rooftop.

The air was sweet; filled with awkward quietness and bittersweet coldness. I had things to say and I was going to say them now. I cleared my throat, and took a deep breathe; filling my lungs with clear air before I began.

''I'm sorry……by the way.'' I apologized, looking down a my feet and pursing my lips together now that I had said the words aloud. I'd put on a very pretty, grey and blue striped dress, but I felt rather stupid now; my black, unflattering jumper tugged over it.

''I…don't understand.'' Rob admitted, sounding as confused as he had right to be. ''Why are you apologizing for?'' He asked me confused.

I didn't know why he was confused for though; I had every reason to apologize. For everything that I did; for hurting him, making bad decisions in the past…this wasn't me. I had changed so badly within days of me staying in LA.

I was still the shy, small Girl that I was in England, but…you wouldn't have known that if you'd met me now. I was a disappointment; I was disappointed with myself.

Dancing around poles, flirting with different Guys, hurting Rob…it wasn't me. At all. And I was sorry for the things that I had done.

''For everything; I just wanted you to know that…well, this isn't me. I don't hurt people; not the old me. But all I've done since I arrived in LA is hurt people. It just isn't me at all; I wanted you to know that.'' I admitted sheepishly.

I expected laughter, I expected annoyance, I expected him to tell me that he was fed up with the excuses, but…I got understanding instead. The one thing that I didn't deserve and I got.

''I understand.'' He replied quietly, sounding as though he was thinking on something or other. ''Do you want to start over?'' He asked me quietly.

''I'd like that, but…I want you to know that…well, that I'm going to try and change. I hate what I've become; not when I think back to how shy and…quiet I was before I moved to LA. I miss that person.'' I confessed.

''Well…I'd like to meet that person.'' I looked back to Rob and was greeted with a heavenly, cheeky smile. I smiled back, before quickly looking away again; taking in the beautiful, blue sky. It was a new start now; I could almost feel it.

***


	61. Pillow Fight

Getting Rob to help me with making my bed was not a good idea. He had offered to help me make my bed, but he was more interested in sitting there and watching me do it myself. Typical Guy, really.

He threw a pillow at me, whilst I was trying to make my bed, making me frown in response. I hated making beds-just like when I was at home-and he wasn't exactly helping things right now, if I was honest.

I looked back at Rob in shock, who was still sat on my bed and grinning at me innocently. And he clearly thought that it was hilarious to just hit me with a pillow like how he did, when it was so inconsiderate.

I mean; he was supposed to be helping me tidy my room not wreck the bloody thing again, and to make it worse; my pillows were likely going to start getting fluff everywhere if he carried on, because my pillows weren't so careful as others.

''Who he fuck do you think you are? Throwing a pillow at me when you're supposed to be helping me tidy my bedroom.'' He laughed happily in response to that, making me frown more unhappily at him.

Men were so inconsiderate. It was true; Tom had a lack of knowledge when it came to making his bed and stuff like this too, even though he did try incredibly hard-more-so than Rob, it seemed-to think more correctly, more often, bless him.

''Oh, just do it later. We're bound to be having another party tonight anyway, and you're bedroom's always a good place to listen to music full blast and er…dance around drunkenly.'' He admitted, making me roll my eyes.

What was rude was the fact that he didn't even bother to ask for my permission to carry on the party in my bedroom, he just assumed. And all the fucking time too. But he was right with what he said.

My bedroom seemed to have more space than his or Tom's rooms, and we would often finish the party in my bedroom, and listen to my ultra-trendy, new stereo that I had gotten cheap enough; which reached full blast if we wanted to annoy passer by's.

''Oh yes sir. And will moi, madam herself be joining this party?'' I asked him jokingly; trying to be as sarcastic as I could because I was still feeling quite offended with the way that he just presumed that he could use my bedroom.

''If you'd like. Though, it would be a shame if you decided to stay in a hotel overnight. You'll miss the party.'' He admitted honestly, with a shrug of his shoulders. I had a feeling that he was just being sarcastic back, because….well, why should I stay in a hotel for when I lived here, with them?

''Are you kidding me, here? Me, stay in a hotel? What on earth for?'' I asked Rob offended. Because if he truly meant that, like it looked like he did; then I was definitely going to beat the bastard up.

''Well you can stay with us, but we'll just end up getting pissed off with your snoring-''

''-I do not snore, thank you very much!'' I interrupted his laughter and hit him around the arm in response to his meanness.

''I'm only joking.'' He promised me, winking at me playfully. I blushed and grinned in response, before quickly looking away again. It didn't help with the fact that there was still a certain awkwardness when we were together.

However, I found it easier to ignore over the duration of us all living together though, nevertheless.

''But…I still think we should have a pillow fight.'' Rob admitted happily, sighing contently as he hit me hard with a pillow, around my arm again. I pouted miserably in response, because he was so rough in the way that he had just hit me.

''You're such a meanie, you know that?'' I asked him furiously. ''I mean there wasn't any need to hit me that hard, was there?'' I asked him annoyed, because it was true. He was just being mean now, I knew it.

''And you love it.'' Rob replied smugly, hitting me again in the arm and making me laugh in response before I could stop myself as I toppled to the bed due to the force of his pillow hitting me again.

''No, I think you'll find that I don't like it.'' I replied sourly-huffing at him in response-and struggling to get up from the bed after I had fallen so hard from the pillow.

''That's not what you were saying last night, baby.'' Rob joked…or at least that's what I thought he was doing, until I felt his hands run up my sides and his body just behind me. I froze in shock automatically.

''Ur…Rob, what are you doing?'' I asked him confused, trying to stay as still as possible-still frozen in shock-as I felt his warm body press closer to mine. He really wasn't joking, I was sure of it.

And it kinda felt awkward…joking like this, because we had agreed to start again just the other day and…well, he had been good to give me the space to figure stuff out on my own for a while, but…this so was not a good idea.

''Sorry…joke. I guess it…wasn't very funny.'' He admitted sheepishly, automatically releasing his hands from my body-leaving me cold again-and moving his body from mine straight away as soon as he realized that I felt uncomfortable with his joke.

''You're right, it wasn't very funny.'' I agreed, wanting to make a joke out of the situation anyway, after my speeding heart finally started to calm down after er…how close er…certain parts of his body had been to mine.

''Especially not after I do this!'' I shouted-trying to sound furious-as I turned around and hit him hard against the chest with my pillow. I laughed in response as he fell back in shock; not expecting me to hit him.

I watched him take that in from the spot that he had fallen on the bed, and his expression turned from shock to smugness. ''That's it!'' He shouted at me, making me laugh in response as he hit me back with the pillow furiously.

I laughed as we hit each other with the pillow with me falling over every single time that he hit me. It was understandable what with my lack of co-ordination and everything. But, never mind all that; it was time to have fun a little.

''I give in!'' I shouted, laughing furiously still as Rob hit me with the pillow again whilst fluff from the pillows clouded us. I knew that now was probably the time to stop because I would have to Hoover this mess up now.

''I said I give!'' I shouted as he climbed on top, laughing as he hit me again and had me completely under his spell and er…body too.

''Fine, if you want to be like that!'' I shouted at him angrily, trying to do my best to hit him and grab hold of his hands to stop him from hitting me with the pillow again. But it didn't work though.

''We have to think sensibly again!'' I tried to no avail, as he pinned my hands down roughly underneath his; his body pressed to mine. He was absolutely irresistible in every single way, and even though he tried to claim that he was unfit for a twenty eight year old; I didn't think that he was getting on too bad, myself!

''You give?'' Rob asked me breathlessly. I laughed back breathlessly and nodded my head once; because I didn't really have another choice, even if I had wanted to carry on this fight. Not with his body pressed irresistibly to mine, like how it was right now.

''Yeah okay, I give!'' I shouted back, planning a little trick in my mind as he started to get off of me. ''Ha-ha…I don't think so, sucker!'' I shouted smugly, laughing as I hit him roughly right in the chest.

''Fucking…god, I wasn't expecting that!'' Rob admitted, after whining in pain and had me pinned back down under his body in minutes. He may have been six years older than me, but you couldn't tell.

I fought for my breathe back and gave into him totally; resting my hands in his, and entwining our fingers easily. I liked the things the way that they were; best friends, with none of that awkwardness between us anymore.

It was like we were made to be friends rather than anything more, and I truly believed that now. I enjoyed us being like this, especially as I was practically getting over him in the long run; in the way that I had loved him before, anyway.

And it was good to know that me and Rob were on the same page now. He knew that I wanted him as my best friend and nothing else, which put me more at ease. Or at least, that's what I thought until…

His lips pressed down onto mine gently, shocking me beyond belief. His lips were warm on my own, kissing me softly as I struggled to understand the actual reason for him kissing me right now. Especially when we were supposed to be just friends right now.

He awaited my reaction patiently as he kissed me, but I stayed frozen under his touch, his kiss. I didn't want to be part of this; I didn't want to give into the million temptations that was daring me to kiss him back.

He was far too irresistible but I couldn't kiss him back. I was just his friend, and it was time that he accepted the choice that I had made. Even if he wasn't planning on making this at all easy for me, like how he wasn't right now.

He groaned in response to my coldness and pressed his lips more urgently to mine; daring me to kiss him back. He was really asking me to, I could tell as I squeezed my eyes shut and waited for this torment to be over.

His tongue prodded my closed mouth, trying to get to me in another attempt to change my mind about this. He forced his tongue roughly into my mouth, seizing the opportunity to taste me properly and tempt me into kissing him even more.

And it was working.

I pushed him away roughly-or at least, tried to-but his body was pressed too hard to mine. His glorious body was pressed tightly to mine as he kissed me urgently; using his tongue to explore my open mouth as I tried to stop this.

I got him away from me just enough, with just enough time to say that I wanted to say before his lips would seize mine again. I had small mini-seconds to do it, so I hurried myself before this situation got too out o hand.

''Stop it! This cant happen!'' I shouted at him furiously; struggling to catch my ragged breathe as he caught his own, before he would seize my mouth again. I was almost in tears over the sheer wrongness of it.

''Fine!'' Rob shouted back, pressing his hands into the back of my hair more tighter though, which confused me. ''Then tell me you don't want me.'' Rob commanded, shocking me. He expected me too.

''Tell me that you don't want me like that and I'll stop and get off.'' He added, explaining for me. I sighed heavily, knowing that I wouldn't be able to. Not without sounding as though I was lying anyway.

Because the truth was, I wasn't totally over Rob. I mean, how could I be over something so self-observing and obsessive? My love for him was so overpowering, even still; after all of these weeks.

What was I supposed to do when I knew that we were only really meant to be friends, and yet I still wanted him? I loved him, I really did, but…I would have still preferred to be his friend. I liked the sound of that, and he wasn't making this easier.

I felt saddened to tears almost about how I was feeling right now. How could I both love someone as a friend, and lover, and want them as more? I mean…why couldn't I just befriends with him? That would have been easier.

''I…I cant!'' I shouted, struggling not to cry as I admitted it. I hated feeling like this; like I would always have to choose one or the other when it came to Rob. I just wanted to be his friend, but fate wouldn't have that.

''Exactly.'' Rob agreed smugly. ''You want me as much as I want you. End of.'' He replied stubbornly, trying to pull his mouth back over mine in his eagerness to kiss me again. I struggled to pull him back from me.

''No, stop it!'' I shouted at him furiously.

Rob sighed, and climbed off of me; throwing his jacket to the floor in temper as he stood up. I watched him as he tried to calm himself down from his temper. Getting angry with me wasn't going to help.

This was how I felt; confused, lost and not really knowing exactly where I should be turning to, right now.

''Then what do you want from me?'' Rob shouted furiously at me, wanting to know. How could I tell him when I didn't know properly myself? He was putting me in more of an awkward situation every time that he demanded more from me.

''I just want to be friends. Its easier that way.''

''Easier for who exactly?'' Rob demanded angrily. I was prepared to make up some more excuses, to tell him that it would be easier for the both of us, but he had already started talking again. ''Look, I don't care what excuses you make.'' He spat.

''Easy is boring, who needs easy when we have what other couples don't even have; the chemistry, the longing, everything that we need right here. In fact I'm going to prove to you that I'm what you really want.''

''No, please! Stop, this isn't-'' but it was too late. His lips were already pressed on mine, silencing my beg automatically. I couldn't take anymore, and I was done with trying to resist him. No more nice Girl.

No more trying to be good, I wanted him closer now, closer than he had ever been to me, and despite the wrongness of it all; I wasn't going to stop. As long as he carried on kissing me that was.

I groaned in response, and let my hands wander down the side of shirt and grabbing the sides of them into my hands; pulling him roughly against me, closer to my body. My heart was soaring erratically in my chest with every kiss that he returned.

All that pent-up tension had been locked up inside of us for weeks, and it seemed that we both couldn't get enough of each other as we kissed each other back with the same fierceness as each other.

His body was pressed against mine through our clothes deliciously; our bodies touching as much as they could through our clothes. And I just couldn't get enough of him; of all of his glorious-self.

And I was truthfully starting to question my reasons for ever saying no to him before. This was just too good, too irresistible to miss out on. The only way that I could truly describe just how irresistible he was to me, was the fact to me; he was like my very own heroin to an addict. That was how much I wanted him.

His hands slipped from my waist and pressed themselves onto either side of my bed as he pushed his body forward eagerly to meet mine, and gripped the bed sheets on either side of me to steady himself as he pressed his body rougher to mine.

He gripped the bed sheets tighter-I could feel the tension in his arms as he steadied himself above me-as his tongue pressed deeper into my mouth, giving me a chance to savor his glorious taste. Like sunshine and daisies; he tasted all things wonderful.

With a hint of cigarette behind the deep mint taste, I couldn't really get enough. His wonderful taste was far too good to waste and I would never get enough of him. Though, I really wished that I could; it would save me less heartache in the long run.

I pressed my hands into the back of his hair, and wrapped my legs gently around his waist, so that there really was no more space between us at all. Because I needed to be as close to him as I possibly could.

His body was pressed closer to mine now, touching as much as we really possibly could be, with his arms around me; hands clenching around the bed sheets as his tongue continued to dance effortlessly with mine.

But I needed oxygen, and if we didn't pull away from each other soon, I was sure that both of us or one of us was going to faint from lack of oxygen. Probably me. I pulled him away from me, but he groaned, and pressed his body eagerly to mine again.

''I need…to breathe.'' I warned him breathlessly, as he tried to place his lips back to mine again. I didn't know what he was breathing in at the minute, but he was doing better without me for oxygen, it seemed.

He huffed a little breathlessly in response, and forced himself to stick to a trail of gentle kisses; starting from my open, gasping lips and slowly leaving lingering, burningly intense kisses further down to my jaw, neck and throat.

He stopped at the edge of my throat, kissing there softly once more as I continued to gasp in deep breathes of well needed air. I squeezed my eyes shut in immense pleasure as he slowly lowered his head back down and gently sucked on the sensitive skin there.

''Rob,'' I moaned out in pleasure. ''Yes…yes, god…please.'' I finished, begging him to carry on as I enjoyed the pleasure surrounding my body due to just mere sucking of my skin. He was just to good.

He sucked harder-complying with my request-and causing me to moan again. It felt too good, and the more that I tried to quiet my embarrassing noises, the harder I found it. I gasped in shock, freezing automatically as he bit the skin there.

Love bite. No way.

It kinda made me shiver; the thought of me lying here and being given an actual love-bite by Rob Pattinson himself. And definitely in delight. My heart was pounding in my chest; dying to be even closer to him.

This was still enough though. The closeness between us was just as pleasant as how close we could get to each other. It was definitely enough for me, and it always would be; our bodies pressed eagerly to each others like this.

He returned his lips back to mine then after we had caught our breathe again, and kissed me urgently; like how he had a few minutes ago. I kissed him back just as eagerly as before; pressing my hands into the very back of his glorious hair tightly; pressing his face even closer to mine greedily.

He released his hands from the bed sheets, and gently trailed his hands down the sides of my body and stopping at my hips. I still kissed him back greedily though and waited to see what he would do next.

He started to tug at my shirt eagerly, and I thrust my body a little in the air to help him with what I knew that he was trying to do. His hands ran underneath, raising my shirt with his hands and skimming my bare skin.

I gasped in response because my conscious was coming back to me. This couldn't happen; especially not with my lack of confidence. I didn't want Rob undressing me like this; this wasn't right.

''No…'' I gasped out. ''I…'' I stopped, not knowing how I should word it. How could I explain that despite the wrongness, I wanted it to carry on, but…I was just too insecure with myself to let it.

''You are so beautiful, you know that. You mean a lot to me, and…I don't want to be just your friend. It's not enough.'' He admitted finally, before pressing his lips back to mine before I could complain. I tried to push him away from me, but it was weak shoves compared to the urgency in his body reacting to mine.

He pulled my shirt from me, and although it wasn't my confidence stopping me now; I knew this wasn't right. Not with where this was heading, and I tried to push him away again, to find his shirt had gone now too.

That was where my self control slipped. I gave in, pressing my hands eagerly to his chest and feeling the masculine, warmth of his chest. He was stunning, in every single way; and now that my hands were touching his glorious, bare chest; I couldn't get enough.

I pressed my lips to his more urgently; running my hands up and down his glorious chest and getting waves of pleasure from him in response. Wrong or right, I wanted to more, and I knew that it was selfish.

I couldn't stop myself though; new Charlie was back, and I wanted to carry on.

I ran my hands down, to the top of his trousers; wondering when this should stop. This couldn't carry on, not like this, when it would be my very first time too. I had not been this close to anyone, like how I was now.

''Hello?'' Tom's voice awoke us from our panic, and we broke away from each other in shock. I grabbed my shirt from the floor and threw it on, with the same time that Rob threw his own shirt on and did the buttons up quickly.

He stayed on my bed, with both of us silent and wondering where this left us now. I was just as confused as him. Well, at leas I thought I was, until he sat down next to me, and entwined my fingers with his.

''I'm sorry for doing that…but I love you. I've been trying to be good, I really have. And yes; I'm probably selfish, but…I'm in love with you, and I cant fight _this_ anymore.'' He admitted, whilst I struggled not to cry about this.

I was stressing out about this because I had done everything all wrong. I still didn't felt as though…we should be doing this. It wasn't right, not after everything that had happened between us.

''I'm sorry.'' I whispered before I ran into the bathroom in time before the tears started. I was so confused about what I wanted right now that it literally ached my heart.

I wanted Rob as a friend, but then I loved him as more. I had a joke with him, a laugh, as friends when we were out clubbing, but then it never seemed enough. I was so confused, and I didn't know what I could possibly do for the best.

***


	62. Drugged

I downed my next shot, ignoring the gaze that I could feel on me. I could understand why Rob was watching me, and why he wanted to talk to me about the kiss we had shared, but…I just couldn't talk about it. Not yet.

I looked down at the dress that I had put on whilst I was in the bathroom; it was strapless and pink, and was quite short so I had put some black tights on with them, so that I wasn't so badly naked.

I looked round again-feeling self conscious-and my eyes found Rob again. He was sat next to Tom and a blonde Girl. This blonde Girl had been trying to get his attention all night, but it wasn't working.

His eyes were on me, begging me to go over there and talk to him; watching me for a reaction of some kind. I kept my dark eyes with his intense grey ones; knowing exactly what he was thinking right now.

He wanted to talk, but I wasn't going to have it. Tonight, I would get drunk. Tomorrow, I could talk about the mistakes that I had made, and deal with the consequences then. Tonight was about having a good time.

And I had a feeling that he would leave me alone for this evening. To think things through properly, on my own. Or at least…I thought that he would have.

''I want to talk to you about today.'' I sighed heavily as I heard Rob's voice from behind me, and tipped back the rest of another shot. Why couldn't he leave this until tomorrow? All I wanted was to have a bit of a laugh for tonight and sort it out tomorrow.

''Please leave this until tomorrow, please.'' I begged him, ordering another shot for myself. I wanted to get drunk and stop worrying about anything for an evening, and then talk to him tomorrow.

''I want to talk to you, now.'' I turned around from the bar in shock, feeling somewhat pissed that he wouldn't leave this alone. He was watching me closely, knowing that I was about to lose my temper in a minute or two.

I pushed him away from me furiously, feeling really pissed off now. I shocked him, but I didn't care. I was so mad about him keep on pushing me away and making this stupid, fucking decision that I was so mad with him!

''Do you really want me to fucking do something I regret? I just fucking asked you to leave it, why cant you?'' I asked him furiously. I pushed him away from me again, as he tried to reach me again.

''You just keep pushing and pushing, and forcing me to make a decision. Well, I've made one.'' I confirmed, getting right in his face as I said the next bit; feeling quite drunk and pissed off now. ''I want you to fuck off. There you go.'' I added, shoving him away from me again.

''You don't mean that. Especially not after this afternoon.'' He confirmed, making me huff again as Tom walked over and watched us in shock. I knew why; he didn't understand anything going on with me and Rob right now.

''Just fuck off and leave me alone. I don't want you to keep bothering me!'' I shouted at him furiously; knowing that I would regret every single word tomorrow morning, after my hangover kicked in.

''Well…fine then. I'll just go and sit over there then. But you know what…starting from tomorrow morning; I don't want anything to do with you. Would that suit you?'' He demanded sarcastically.

''Yeah, that's fine with me.'' I replied, huffing at him angrily. He shook his head angrily at me-looking so pissed off-and walked off with Tom following, watching us both confused about what was going on.

I downed another shot and kept on drinking more and more alcohol as the night went on. I knew I was really drunk by that point, but I didn't care. Because as long as I could still feel, I wasn't getting over Rob.

I looked over at the dance-floor to see Rob looking this way again. He was dancing with a dark haired Girl, with long, straight hair. She was very pretty and despite being selfish; I felt a little jealous.

I huffed in response when I caught him looking at me, and quickly looked away from him again. I wasn't looking where I was going when I got down from the bar stool though, and I bumped right into somebody.

''Oops, sorry. I'm a little bit drunk.'' I explained before I giggled helplessly. I got a husky laugh back, sending weird little shivers up and down my arms in response. I looked up in shock, to see the cutest Guy I had ever seen in my life. And, no joke.

He had dark, spiky hair and glorious blue eyes, and he had the most cutest face I had ever seen. He smiled; the smile lightening up his face. He was quite tall and burly; and his chest was very muscular looking underneath his suit.

''Well, that's fine.'' He replied in a slight, London accent. ''How about I buy you a drink? You look as though you could need one.'' He added, making me smile in response. He was right, of course.

''Yeah, alright then.'' I agreed easily; sitting on a bar stool and looking round to the dance floor again.

Rob was watching in shock; the brunette Girl trying to get his attention as he watched us getting a drink. I shook my head in response and turned away quickly; feeling somewhat guilty about the way that he was looking at me.

''Here, have this. It will make you feel better.'' The Guy joked. I laughed and took the shot glass from him and tipped it back without even looking what it was. I just needed to get as drunk as possible, so badly tonight.

It tasted kinda weird; like bitter and sweet mixed together but it was nice whatever it was. I didn't recognize the flavor, but it was dead strong. Stronger than anything I had actually tasted before, if that was even possible when we went clubbing with Rachael back in America.

I kept on drinking the drinks that he brought me, desperate to get as drunk as I possibly could. I ignored Rob, knowing that he was looking at me, because I would talk to him tomorrow. I planned to…after I had had a bit of fun, of course.

It was when I had my tenth shot that everything started to get blurred and out of control. My memory went blank after that, and I don't have a clue what happened after that, because I was that drunk.

***


	63. Rob POV!

**Rob POV-**

**Attack**

I glanced around again at Charlie. It was a constant habit, one that I was finding too irresistible to resist tonight. Worry seized me through as I saw her dance with the Guy she had been talking to at the bar, all night.

Worry, and something else…jealousy. There was no denying that. I knew that I was jealous about the image in front of me and who could blame me? I wanted it to be me with her, not him. I was incredibly selfish.

I took in the beautiful dress that she was wearing; something that I had done, all night. A slim line, red dress; following every single curve that this beautiful lady had. It was fiery red to match her feisty temper.

Despite all the flaws that people from the outside might see when they look at her, I saw nothing of the kind. I only saw the good in her; the side of her that I adored despite everything that had happened between us.

I was obsessed but I couldn't seem to quit it; quit her. She was like a drug and the more that I got from her; the only hungrier it made me. It was crazy about how mad I was on this Girl. Especially when she didn't even know it herself.

She was in denial about just how much she meant to me, and the craziest thing was; she didn't even seem to realize just how beautiful she was. And it only pulled me to her even more than possible.

In my eyes, she was more beautiful than anyone I had ever set eyes on, and for that; I was even more attracted her than ever. She didn't seem to even understand just how much of an effect she had on me.

Despite the flaws, I could only ever see the good in Charlie like how some might see. She was a laugh, and she was genuine, and a little crazy too. And no Girl had caught my attention as much as the way she did when she came into my life.

How could I notice anyone else whenever she was around?

It would be impossible to ignore a rose over the thorns of a flower. That was the only way I could describe how she had a hold of me. It was crazy and I could never really understand how somebody could have gotten to me just like how she had.

But it seemed that…well, she was going just a little overboard wit the craziness tonight, as she danced with this Guy…who, she didn't even know until ten minutes ago. I was worried about her, I had to admit.

''Hey,'' the Girl next to me called, because I had been watching Charlie for the entire ten minutes that we were talking to each other and I hadn't even been listening to her properly. Not whilst I had my eyes on Charlie.

''Ur…sorry.'' I apologized. I picked up my bottle of beer that I had put down on the glass table in front and drank a sip as I struggled to remember the Girl's name. I had forgotten about everything in the last ten minutes because I had been staring at the one thing that I wanted most and couldn't even have.

''That's okay; I was just asking you if you wanted me to get you another beer.'' She told me, as my eyes darted back over to Charlie out of habit. She was still on the floor, dancing with the same Guy she had been with all night.

''Ur…no, thanks.'' I replied, trying to sound interested. I couldn't really help it though, not with Charlie right in my view. It was impossible to ignore someone as beautiful as her. Even when I tried.

Things were slipping out of control though, as far as I could see. Charlie was kissing this Guy now, and things were definitely getting heated by the looks of things. Yes, I was jealous, but she was still my friend; and I was worried about her.

She didn't even know this Guy and she was all over him. She had only been talking to him for the last few hours, and the guy looked a total sleaze. He was all over, and he had been for the last few hours; buying her lots of alcoholic drinks all night.

''I'll be back in a sec. I just er…have to do something.'' I told her. I got up from the club chair and walking over to where Charlie and this Guy was dancing on the floor. I had to at least try to talk to her.

As soon as Charlie saw me heading over however, she groaned in response; telling me that she definitely wasn't going to listen to me. I didn't care though; somebody had to speak to her, before this got way over her head.

''Whart arrrre yoooou doin overrrr here?'' She demanded annoyed; drunkenly slurring her words at me. She was completely wasted; that much was obvious. I bet she wouldn't even remember this in the morning.

''I'm here to take you home. You're wasted.'' I warned her, not because I was trying to start an argument with her; but because I was genially concerned about her. Things seemed to be spiraling out of control, from what I could see.

''Donnnnn't get all er…hypo er…hypocrical.'' She warned me furiously, slurring her words again as she weakly shoved me away. She was that drunk that even if this sleaze of a Guy did want to take advantage of her; she wouldn't have been able to fight him off.

''I'm just concerned, okay?'' I asked her, because it was true. I didn't want her getting hurt, especially not with considering how drunk she was. I had never seen her as drunk as how she was, tonight.

''Well, don't be. She's fine with me, and I'll look after her.'' I looked up at the sleaze of a Guy who had said that. Yep, he looked like a sleaze too. He was a burly sort-of guy, but there was something about him that I didn't quite like.

It wasn't helping with the big smirk painted on his face. But then, Charlie would have been too drunk to notice that.

''Well, I'm her friend. So, thanks for the offer, but I look out for my friends.'' I warned him, hoping to get the message across. He glared at me in response, and Charlie…well, Charlie was just Charlie.

Stubborn as hell.

''Jurst gooooo awaaaay!'' Charlie shouted at me, pushing her away from me with more fierceness now. I sighed, trying to think of how I could word my explanation for being worried about her, without pissing her off too much.

It was a tough call, what with Charlie being as stubborn as she was.

''Charlie, I'm trying to help you-''

''-Noooo, you're not! You'rrre jurst pissring me off!!'' She shouted at me angrily. I sighed; knowing that I could never win with Charlie. No matter how many times I tried to help her out; it ended on deaf ears.

She didn't seem to even care about how much I cared for her, loved her. She was right; she had changed a lot since moving to LA, whether she was drunk or not. She was still ridiculously stubborn, and I was still madly in love with the Girl.

But, I just wasn't really too sure about which Charlie I was in love with. The one before she had changed; the shy, funny Charlie. Or this one; the drunk, sarcastic Charlie. I had a feeling that I was just in love with her, herself.

Crazily so, yes. But, still the truth. I was crazily in love with her, and nothing that she threw at me could make me feel any different. I could never help the way I felt whenever I was with her; she was my addiction.

Charlie started to storm off then, with her hand in this Guy's hand and I knew I had to stop her. I had nothing else to do. I ran after her, and pulled her to stop by her arm, which definitely wasn't the right thing to do with Charlie.

She pushed me away from her, furiously; almost stumbling over herself because she was that drunk. ''Learve me alone! I'rm goin home!'' She growled the words at me furiously, before grabbing this Guy's hand again and pulling her out of the club with her.

I ran after her again, calling her as she walked over to a taxi with him. She all but ignored me, but as I tried to stop her from getting into the taxi; it all but didn't work.

I sighed heavily, watching the taxi leave in frustration and knowing that this was getting far out of hand. If she really had gone home with him, like it looked like she had; I imagined that this was definitely not going to end good.

I cursed under my breathe and kicked a lamppost in frustration; totally oblivious to the pain in my foot, because there was a lot more pain due to the image replaying in my head. Her and him, kissing. Over and over again.

I could admit that I was furiously jealous, but I was still half and half. Half of me was incredibly jealous, and the other side was panicking about where this night could take her. She was far too drunk for anything to happen between them, but the Guy really did seem like a sleaze to me; and I wasn't just saying that because he was with Charlie.

If he did take advantage of her, she wouldn't have a chance to protect herself. She had put herself in that danger from just being as drunk as she clearly was, tonight. And I was very concerned over her welfare, tonight.

I stormed back into the club to find Tom. I found him easily above the sea of people dancing on the club floor. I walked over to his table and caught his attention automatically.

''Are you alright, mate?'' He asked me casually as he sipped his bottle of beer. I shook my head and walked round the table and taking a seat next to him.

''We need to go. Charlie's in trouble.'' I told him; shouting above the heavy music. He sighed in response and nodded, downing the last of his beer before putting the bottle back onto the table in front of him.

''Did that Guy go home with her?'' He asked in shock, after looking around the club for him. I nodded, confirming his worries.

''Right,'' he agreed, getting on the sofa he was sat. ''We better get going then.'' He agreed, jumping from the sofa and following me out of the club. I raced over to a taxi in my eagerness to go home and make sure that Charlie was alright.

Tom paid the taxi fair as I rang her mobile, trying to get hold of her. I got her answer phone, which only made me feel even more anxious. I tried the house phone, only to get the answer phone again.

I waited for our silly, voice message to end in my hurry to save a message in hope that she would hear it and be able to answer in time.

''Hey! This is our _new_ answer phone!'' Tom's voice said on the message.

I could hear Charlie's happy laughter in the background. ''Yep, so if you want to leave a message…''

''…Or just called because you miss the sound of our voice's.''

''Rob!'' Tom and Charlie's voice's complained on the machine. We all laughed together on the machine.

''Then just leave a message, and we'll try to get hold of you as soon as we can.'' My voice on the answer machine finished.

If I hadn't have been so tense with worry, I would have probably laughed about how happy we all sounded together. But I couldn't even crack a smile, not now that I was panicking about her, like how I was, right now.

''Charlie, it's Rob. I'm just calling to…well, to make sure that you're alright. I know you're mad with me right now, but…well I'm worried about you.'' I didn't know what else to say, so I left it like that, waiting for a moment for any sign that she was going to answer.

I got none, so with a sigh; I put the phone down again. Tom flashed me a smile; trying to tell me that everything was going to be okay, even though both of us didn't know that. I didn't know anything at this moment.

''She'll be okay, mate. No matter what happens, she's just drunk, and she's got us.'' Tom reminded me. I nodded, and kept my eyes on the window next to me; just desperate to get home and make sure that she was okay, for myself.

The sad thing was; I knew I wasn't going to get over Charlie. I had been head over heels about her since day one, so I didn't exactly have a very good chance of getting over her anytime now. But I had gotten used to that fact; never let it bother me because I was doing what I wanted all along; fighting for the one thing I had always wanted since that very first day.

I raced out of the taxi whilst Tom paid the taxi fair and ran up to the front gates of our house. They had been left open, which was unusual, but I didn't give that a second thought as I sprinted to our front door and jammed the key into the lock.

I flung the front door open, calling for Charlie as I sprinted into the house, looking for her. The house was far too quiet; even for a big house like this; that was unusual. It was never quiet when we were in the house; especially with having Charlie around.

I ran up the stairs, breathless from running up our huge garden and these stairs, but determined not to give in looking for her until I found her. I raced into the hallway, and ran into the room where she could only be.

I ran into her bedroom, still in shock about the image in front of me and threw the Guy off of her in seconds. I didn't care if she was still coherent enough to make a sentence or not; she could have a go at me, later.

Because it was clear by the state of her that she was completely wasted; more-so than she was at the club. She definitely wouldn't be able to start an argument with me any time soon.

So, with that in mind; I threw him off of her, his back hitting the wall with a deafening bang. I didn't even stop to think about that, because I was too fired up to stop now. He had taken advantage of her; there was no doubt about that.

The state she had been in a moment ago; just lying there underneath him…nobody could give consent in that state with whatever filth this jerk had in mind.

''Get off of me, you idiot!'' He complained as I pinned him back against the wall, my fist flying out, ready to hit him in my blind fury. There was no way that he was getting away with what he wanted to do with my friend.

''Rob…I think something's seriously wrong with Charlie.'' I put him back down and turned around to see. Tom was hovering over Charlie looking as anxious as me, and with one look at Charlie…I realized that he was right.

Something was definitely not right.

Her face was pale, paler than her usual creamy color. She looked cold, but her face was hot; burning hot, and sweaty. Her eyes were struggling to stay open, rolling into the very back of her head.

I grimaced and turned away; sickened by the sight. She looked ill, so ill and fragile. I hated it when anybody was ill, especially Charlie. And there she was; lying lifelessly on the bed as she gasped for her breathe.

I took a deep breathe and forced myself to look back to Charlie. Tom was already ringing for an ambulance, with the Guy running past me. Which brought me back to reality; he had done something to her. He had hurt her, and I would find out how.

''Oi, where do you think you're going?'' I demanded; grabbing hold of his shirt collar and swinging him back round to face me. I was furious with him; above the point of thinking sensibly and now I was ready to fight him.

''Get off of me!'' He shouted, trying to pull me away from him. He had no chance, not until I found out what he had done to her.

''What did you do to her?'' I shouted at him furiously; my fist flying to his face before I could stop myself. My fury was overtaking the right, sending me over the edge.

''I just…I just gave her a drug, that's all. She was up for it, anyway!'' He shouted back, cowering away from my hands.

''You little shit!'' I growled at him, throwing my fist to his face again as my temper blew over once more. I lost control; not knowing when to stop and I was too far lost in my own rage to ever think about stopping now.

''Rob, Rob; stop it!'' Tom shouted behind me, trying to stop me whilst he was still trying to tell the ambulance what was wrong with Charlie. ''Charlie, needs you now. She doesn't need you to act like a thug!'' He was right.

I stopped as soon as he had mentioned Charlie and watched him get up and make a run for it. ''Hey you, get back here!'' Tom shouted angrily, following the thug out of the room; phone still to his ear.

I turned around and knelt besides Charlie, who was still lying on the bed; her chest heaving as she gasped for breathe still. I couldn't stand to barely look at her; the state she was in was terrifying to me.

Her eyes were still rolling back and forth and into her head, and I could tell that she was struggling to keep her eyes open with every heaving gasp she took. I ached to see her like this; I felt as though I was in pain, myself.

''Charlie, just keep your eyes open, okay? If you can hear me, just know that you'll be okay, I promise.'' I promised her, rubbing her forehead with a flannel as she stayed silent, lifeless and limp.

Even with her hand in mine; it laid flat there, as lifeless as her body. ''I love you.'' I promised her, kissing her hand before carrying on to try and cool her hot temperature down. Her forehead felt soaring hot.

She started to cough then, and it sounded as though something was caught in her throat. I knew exactly what it was already; she had been drugged after all. And with drugs, the usual thing is to do this.

I turned her over so that she was on her side and so she couldn't choke as she was sick on her bed's duvet. I rubbed her back as soothingly as I could, tapping it to help her sometimes as she stopped again.

I didn't turn her over, incase she was sick again. One harm with her lying on her back was the possibility of choking on her own sick. She closed her eyes as if to go to sleep, sending me souring with panic again.

''Charlie, keep your eyes open. You have to, okay? Listen to me!'' I shouted at her furiously, shaking her to wake her up again. Her eyes fluttered open but her eyelids only continued to roll back into her head.

I waited impatiently for the ambulance to arrive, wanting so badly to help her. Because the longer that the ambulance took, the more chance that Charlie would fall back to sleep; which was something that I didn't want.

Not when there was a lot more chance that she would be in more danger if she went to sleep rather than if she stayed awake. I'd heard all about people being drugged and what happened to them afterwards.

And I was going to do everything in my power to keep Charlie alive. Everything.

***

**This is the end of this story; the next one; ****Let Me Sign**** is already up in Fanfiction. Please read and tell me if you think I did Rob's POV okay. **


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